by Lovell, Dani
"You want more?"
"Yes, fuck me, Luke, fuck me..."
He kisses my mouth over and over, hot, open mouthed kisses. "No. No sex. I'm going to make you come right now." He growls as he flicks my clit and swiftly slides back inside me, pushing hard and deep. I cry out loud as he slowly pulls back and pushes in again, twisting his wrist, his fingers moving inside. It's outstanding and he's absolutely right, he is definitely going to make me come right now.
I clutch hold of the sheets below me and curl my toes as the waves slowly come forth, his fingers turning, pushing, twisting inside me, brushing against that sweet spot. "Come hard, Til..." he growls through gritted teeth and I moan slowly; one long, continuous cry as it crashes through me, everything tingling, my muscles tensing at this outstanding, forceful orgasm. My teeth clenched, he kisses my face and I can't possibly move to kiss him back... I'm stuck, locked to the spot, riding this fucking amazing orgasm to its very, very end.
His fingers gently twist, moving slowly, easing my body from this rigidity, as I come down and relax my muscles. He kisses my lips again and I grab his neck with my hand, holding him against me as I kiss him back, passionately, sliding my tongue in his mouth, needing him to understand how incredible that was.
We snog for short while before we come-to, realising we need to get downstairs. We've been missing for quite a while now. He washes his hands and I change my undies and brush my hair, before making our way downstairs, holding hands. My stomach still aches a little bit, but I'm sure once I eat, I'll be fine. "So do you have any questions about the baby stage?" I ask on the way.
"I'm pretty sure I will. I'll let you know."
"Okay."
Downstairs, everyone is rosy cheeked and merry, laughing, chatting; it's a perfect Christmas afternoon. The meal will be served shortly, so we're gradually starting to make our way into the stylish dining room. The table is set beautifully with gold decorations and crystal glassware, the centrepiece a huge round vase filled with gold baubles and crystals. The white table cloth is scattered with more tiny crystals, each one glimmering in the light, making the table sparkle spectacularly.
"Wow, this looks fabulous." I say to no one in particular as I stroll around the long table, looking for my place card.
"They did a fantastic job, didn't they?" Alexia responds with a smile from across the table. Wow! She's talking to me.
"I think I want a Pam." I say, jovially, feeling a bit awkward given the unkind thoughts I've had about the woman I'm talking to.
"I wish I could take her home with me, she's amazing. They all are," she says, softly.
Luke appears at my side and puts a hand on my bottom. "Are we here, gorgeous?"
I nod and put my hand on his back, stroking his delicious muscles. As we sit, he whispers to me. "What are the foods you can't eat? There are some, right?"
I respond quietly, "Yes, I can't eat soft cheeses, shell fish, or undercooked meat - like a steak that's not well done. But this food will be fine."
"Okay. Good. What will happen if you eat those things?"
Blimey, he really is protective. "Probably nothing, but there's a higher risk of food poisoning with the fish and meat and I read up about soft cheese because I really wanted some brie, apparently it can contain listeria bacteria which can cause listeriosis. The risk is higher in pregnant people because of hormone changes or something so it can cause miscarriage and stuff like that."
"Oh god. Don't eat any cheese."
I smile, "It's only soft cheese that's mould ripened. Other cheeses like cheddar are okay. Don't worry, I won't eat any cheese with mould."
"Maybe you shouldn't eat cheese at all, just in case."
"Luke, I can eat hard cheese. Stop worrying."
He puts his elbow on the table and rubs his forehead again as he nods, silently. I wish I could stop him stressing. I stroke his back and lean in to kiss his cheek, whispering in his ear, "Don't worry. We'll be fine."
His eyes close and he puts an arm around me, holding me against him. I see Alexia watching our affectionate embrace from the corner of my eye, she's smiling broadly. Why was I jealous of her again?
The magnificent meal is set in front of us all on the table, the turkey is huge and incredibly delicious looking; golden, juicy and... and... god I'm fucking starving, can we eat now?
Alexia stands this time, to toast everyone. She says that although she isn't staying here, this is still her house and she'd like to welcome everyone, and hopes that Clare, Oliver, Luke and I are all enjoying our stay here. Which we are, immensely. Again, like Daniel last night, she toasts to Pam and Marsha for the fabulous meal and their wonderful decorations. Apparently they are always invited to spend the Christmas meal with the Berkeleys, but they religiously decline, and remain in the kitchen to continue cleaning and preparing desserts.
She toasts the happy couple again, congratulating them on their one day anniversary of engagement, and follows by toasting Luke and I, saying how wonderful it is that we have found each other. I thought that was very sweet, and considering she's shy in social situations - very gracious. I'm such a bitch for wanting to steamroll her.
As we all dig in and load up our plates, I remind myself to be careful and not overload like I did last night. I don't want to have to vomit in front of this perfect man again. How mortifying. Still, he didn't seem to mind. My belly still aches a bit on one side, but maybe after I eat, things will move along. Might even be from retching last night, maybe I pulled something.
Oliver is on my other side, talking with Clare and Luke is deep in conversation with Bea as we begin to eat, when I get a short, sharp pain in my side. Ow! I grimace and rub it hard, easing it a little, trying not to make it too obvious in front of Luke, he'll only have a panic attack and take me to A&E for a check up or something. So I continue to eat, forgetting about it, thoroughly enjoying this mouthwatering feast.
I put my knife and fork down for a moment, to reach for my water and as I lift the glass, I get another, sudden, agonisingly sharp pain, in exactly the same place - much, much worse than the last one. I cry out, dropping my glass on my plate, and I double over, screeching my chair loudly on the wooden floor. The room silences as I hold my belly and grimace again, not even thinking about where I am, or who's watching me.
Luke stands in a shot, throwing his napkin on the table. "Holy fuck!" he cries, "Til, what's happening?"
I shake my head, I don't know what's happening and I'm scared, but right now, I can't talk, it hurts so much.
He rests his hand on my back and crouches next to me. "Put your arm around my neck, Princess, come on, we've got to get out of here." I manage to do as he says and he lifts me, effortlessly out of the chair, and carries me over to the door. I catch a glimpse of Clare on my way out, she has her fingertips covering her mouth, her eyes watering, she looks so worried. I want to tell her I'm okay, but I don't even know if I am. Oliver looks confused, and I don't get a chance to see what everyone else is doing, I'm out in the lounge before I know it.
"Baby, what the hell is it? Let me get your coat, we're going to the emergency room."
"No... no..." I manage, holding the side of my tummy and closing my eyes. "Luke, no. Let me just lie down for a little bit."
"No fucking chance, Tilly. There is something seriously wrong right now."
"Luke. Please stop. I think I need to lie down, maybe go to the bathroom, maybe even have a nice warm bath. I think it could be...uh, well...I really don't want to talk about it with you."
"What the fuck? Tilly, you fucking tell me right now, this isn't funny."
Jesus Christ, what the hell?! I press my hand against his chest. "Luke, stop panicking. It's easing a little now. I think it might just be that I'm..."
"That you're what? Would you just friggin' tell me?'
"Constipated! Okay? Consti-fucking-pated! Happy now?"
"No way. You don't do what you just did in there because you're fucking constipated," he shouts.
"Luke, be quiet! Ple
ase? Just take me upstairs. We can give it a minute, see if I'm right. If you're still worried, or I am, you can take me to the hospital. Okay?"
His face is as white as a sheet. He gawks at me for a moment, he looks totally lost. "Til, I don't know... I mean, I just don't know. What should I do? Make you go? Do what you want? What am I supposed to do right now?"
I clasp both hands around the back of his neck and look him in the eye. "Listen to me. Calm down. What I really need you to do is take me upstairs. Please? Please? I just want to lie down."
He simply nods and takes me straight up the stairs, opening the door to his room and placing me gently onto the bed. He slips my shoes off and swiftly pulls a t-shirt from the drawers. "Let me undress you and get you into something more comfortable."
I slide my dress up my thighs and under my bum and he takes it from there, slipping it over my head. He removes my bra gently and helps me into his t-shirt. "Do you want socks?" he asks, still as pale as anything.
"No, thank you. I'll just get into bed and lie down for a bit."
"Til, is this because of the fall earlier?"
"No, absolutely not, that was nothing."
"And have you eaten anything bad? Cheese? Meat? Oh god, it's not the meat we ate the other night, is it?"
"No, Luke. I'm not... you know... that's not happening. I'm fine, Wriggler is fine."
He helps me under the covers and then disappears into the en-suite. I hear the bath running as I close my eyes and pray that everything is okay. Please let this be a pulled muscle or constipation... okay, so neither has never hurt quite like this before, but I know there's a hold up in there because... well... no, I don't need to go into details about dates and shit. Quite literally.
He returns to the room and turns the light off, crawling onto the bed next to me and putting an arm around my chest. "Is this okay? Am I hurting you?"
"No. Not at all. I need a cuddle, Luke." I say feeling a little bit teary, and he opens his arms, allowing me to turn and scoot inside, snuggling up to his chest. As soon as he wraps those big arms around me, I let go and begin to cry a little. I didn't realise quite how scared I was downstairs, until now.
"Shh." He rubs my back, soothingly. "How is it now? A little better?"
I nod. "A little bit, it's not sharp now, just a dull ache."
He says nothing, I wish I could see his face, but I'm don't want to move from the warm embrace I'm locked in. I can feel his heart thudding through his chest against my face.
We lay silently for a moment, alone in our thoughts, together - physically. A knock at the door makes me jump. "Til... Til? Can I come in?" It's Bea.
Luke moves back so he can look at my face, "You want me to send her away?"
I shake my head. "No."
"But you aren't going to..."
"No, Luke. I won't say anything."
He calls out, telling her to come in. She walks straight over to me and sits on the bed next to me. "Til, are you okay? What's wrong? What happened?"
"I don't know, my stomach feels really bad."
"What is it? Have you eaten anything? Do I need a mask?" she asks humorously.
I smile, weakly, I'm just not quite with it. "No, I've been a bit bunged up and it's just gone on a bit too long, that's all. Don't tell everyone that, please?" I ask, managing to pull a mock-horrified face.
Bea grins. "Of course not. Go and have yourself a nice warm bath and a good old shit. You'll feel better in no time." She says, making me giggle out loud, which actually hurts my belly. I still, closing my eyes and holding my tummy.
"Are you okay?" Luke asks, panicked again.
"Yes, yes." I say, reaching for his hand and holding it tightly. "Bea, just tell them that I have a funny tummy."
"Will do, doll. Feel better, I'm sad you're missing Christmas but I want you happy and healthy. Look after my BFF, Lukey boy."
"I will," he says, not even a trace of humour for Bea.
She stands and walks to the door to leave. "Oh, Bea?"
"Uh huh?"
"Can you tell Clare that I said 'don't worry'?"
"Yes, I will. She's a right old worry wart that one. Feel better, love you."
"Love you."
She leaves the room and I snuggle back into Luke, feeling so sleepy all of a sudden.
"Til, can I move to turn the faucet off, real quick?"
I smile, my eyes closed. "Of course."
I wake up as he climbs back into the bed and suddenly remember what's happening. I feel like I've been asleep for a couple of hours, not a matter of minutes. Panic spreads through me, and I immediately want to go and sit on the loo and prove myself right.
"Luke, I'm going to go to the bathroom."
"Okay, shall I come with you?"
"Uh... no."
"I think I should."
"No. For what I'm going in there for, I really don't need company."
"But you might..."
"Really, no. You may not join me."
He sighs loudly. "Okay, but leave the door open."
"Are you being serious?"
"Absolutely, leave the door open." He has his dominant face on.
"Oh my god." I shake my head as I walk, hunched over, into the bathroom. I push the door to, but leave it slightly ajar, to satisfy the stress-head.
I'm really not sure I need to tell you about what happened in the bathroom, but it was semi-successful. That's all you should want to know. I climbed into the bath immediately afterwards and lay back in the warm bubbles. It was fabulously soothing, and the ache practically diminished after about fifteen minutes.
Luke made me promise that I'd tell him when I want to get out, so that he could help me, so I called out after a while and he loyally arrived by my side with a big, fluffy towel and assisted me out of the bath like I'm some sort of frail old lady. But I love it really, he's so caring.
We get back into bed, this time Luke takes his clothes off, and we snuggle up ready to sleep. I think we both had a shock today and we're quiet, tired and in need of a big cuddle. Well, I am, anyway.
As I curl up in his arms, he kisses my head and whispers to me, gently running the tips of his fingers up and down my back. "So you're feeling a lot better, sweet-cheeks?"
I nod against his chest. "Yes, much better, thank you."
"I'd still be happier if you'd let me take you to the emergency room."
"No, I'll be fine. The ache is very slight now, I'm sure it'll be gone soon."
"What, you mean it's still there? The ache?"
Oh gawd... "Yes, but it's not a lot at all. Stop worrying, Wriggler and I are fine."
He doesn't say anything else, he just lies there holding me while I drift off into a deep sleep.
~~~~~~~
"Til... Til..." Luke's voice stirs me easily.
"Hmm?"
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing?" I say, puzzled and still half asleep.
"You're moaning and moving around a lot, is your belly hurting again?"
I still for a moment and realise that it is, the ache is back and it's quite intense. It's not the deep pain from earlier on, but it definitely hurts. "Mmm, yes. It is."
"Right, come on. Where are your boots?" He turns the bedside light on and I attempt to sit up, barely able to open my eyes in the brightness.
"What? Why?"
"We're going to the emergency room and I'm not taking no for an answer."
"But Luke," I begin.
"No, Tilly, no. There's no room for discussion, we are going." Bossy boots is back!
"Can't I just..."
"No! Where are your boots?"
"Um..." I rub my forehead, trying to think. "Downstairs by the door, I think."
"Okay, good. Stay there."
He leaves the room quietly and I check the time, it's two in the morning. I could try to contest further, but I don't think it'll work, and he'll only get angry with me. And honestly, I believe I know what the source of the pain is, but I'm no doctor and I have no idea if my di
agnosis is correct. I'm a little... okay - a lot worried, too.
I slowly slip my legs out of the bed and prepare my sleepy body to get up when Luke re-enters with my fur coat hanging over his arm, my scarf, gloves and head band in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. He drops everything on the bed to put my coat on.
"Can't I put some trousers on first?"
"No need, my t-shirt is more than sufficient."
"I need trousers."
"No, the coat is long enough."
"Luke. Stop. Please go and get me some trousers, I will not go anywhere without some on." He stops and looks at me briefly, before realising I'm quite right and nodding. He makes his way to my room and I get wrapped up.
A few moments later, we're quietly making our way down stairs, careful not to wake anyone. He helps me put my boots on and slowly walks me down the steps to the car. I start to feel nervous, what if something is wrong? He lifts me into my seat and dashes around the car to get in himself. "It won't take too long, baby," he says and I nod with a half smile. He clutches my hand as he reverses out of the drive.
~~~~~~~
The journey home from the hospital was silent. You could have heard a pin drop in the car, between the occasional snivel. It was a highly emotional, very moving couple of hours and I think it will be etched into my mind for as long as I live.
Walking in to the house at about five, everyone is still asleep so all is noiseless and still. I take my boots off, and make my way up to the bedroom alone, as he goes to the kitchen. It doesn't take long for me to undress and slip into bed, the poignant early hours of the day tumbling down on my composure; tears trundle down my cheeks as I break down, alone.
The anxiety increased tenfold on the journey, and by the time we reached the hospital, we were both nervous wrecks. They were particularly thorough, they listened for the heartbeat, they performed an ultrasound scan, they checked me from top to bottom.
I think watching Luke through the whole process was what affected me the most. He was petrified. He comforted me one minute, and then had to leave the room the next. I couldn't understand his behaviour, and I still don't. Wriggler is happy as Larry in there, and I am fine. It took a simple dose of medicine to get everything moving and for the worry to be gone.
