Trust in Me

by Lydia Rose

  “Can I speak with you in private a moment, Paige?”

  Paige rolled her eyes at Jules and winked, “Just for a minute, Arthur. I have to finish getting ready.”

  “I won’t keep you long.” He turned to Jules. “It was nice to meet you.”

  “You too,” Jules mumbled.

  “What did he want?” she asked when Paige returned.

  “Nothing important. They’re starting to make announcements. We should get outside.” Paige took her arm and led her out the door. She felt there was no need to upset Jules with her conversation with Arthur. He had come here with the hope of talking her into rejoining the tour, but Paige wasn’t giving him an answer. She didn’t think her body could take the grueling torture of playing tournament after tournament. Paige knew that the new legs she was wearing today would be the test of how she felt after these next two days.

  *

  At the end of the first day’s play, Jules and Paige were behind the leaders by two. Of course the leaders were Karen and her mother. Jules had played well except for one shot that veered off course. Paige was happy that it happened on the last hole of the day so Jules wouldn’t be thinking about it the rest of day.

  “I’m sorry, Paige. I blew that shot,” she said as they walked back to the club.

  “Wasn’t your fault. I heard someone cough just as you got to your backstroke. It was unfortunate, but we can make it up tomorrow.”

  The women didn’t get to the clubhouse when the press and TV commentator stopped them in their tracks. They had just finished with Karen and Nancy and now it was their turn. “You two played well today with the exception of the last hole,” he said looking at Jules.

  “This is only Jules’s second tournament and I believe she is playing exceptionally well.”

  “How are you feeling?” he asked, looking down at Paige’s legs. “I know you left the tour after your accident. Do you think you will have problems finishing tomorrow?”

  Paige was steaming inside, but her face never faltered as she kept smiling. “I feel great and we will not have a problem finishing. Thank you all for your support.” She began to take Jules’s arm, but the commentator stopped her.

  “What about you?” he asked Jules, sticking the microphone in her face. “How are you feeling?”

  “Sorry that I missed that shot, but I feel confident that Paige and I can still win the tournament.” Her smile felt so fake along with her words, she thought she was going to be struck by lightning.

  “Well, good luck tomorrow, ladies.”

  Paige stopped to speak with other reporters while Jules went inside to shower and change. By the time she came inside, Jules was in her bra and underwear. “Do you want me to set you up in the handicapped shower?”

  “No. I’ll shower at home. I just have to change my shoes.” Paige watched Jules out of her eye as she changed her shoes. “I wish you would forget about today because I have.”

  “I can’t forget. I blew today and I probably will do it again tomorrow.”

  Paige stood up and wrapped her arms around her. “I don’t care. Let’s just have some fun and whatever happens, happens.” She now held her at arm’s length. “Okay?”

  Jules nodded and wiped at her eyes. “How are your legs feeling?”

  “Great.” Paige bounced on her feet. “I can’t believe how comfortable these things are.” For artificial legs they were comfortable, but nothing would ever replace the legs she was born with.

  Jules finished dressing and they walked toward the exit. “Let’s go home and get some rest.”

  *

  Jules had taken Paige’s words to heart. She was going to pretend that today was just another day of playing golf and whatever happened would be the way it was supposed to be. Paige had spent the evening trying to lighten the mood, but nothing worked. Not even their lovemaking had provided the release they both wanted and needed.

  The tournament began easily and both Jules and Paige seemed to be having a good time. Even Jules’s caddy asked her if she was all right because she had a smile on her face that couldn’t be erased. The first half of the course alternated between them being in the lead and the next it would be Karen and Nancy. The seventeenth hole was a par five and both their opponents finished the hole one under par. Jules came up to the tee and hit the ball straight and far landing just short of the green. When she turned around, Paige gave her a smile and a wink as she lined up her shot. Jules stood to the side and the crowd quieted before she hit the ball. It was a shot that Jules had never seen in her life. Paige had hit that ball so far that she had a hard time keeping an eye on it and then it went into the hole. The crowd went wild with screams and Jules was so excited she forgot where she was. “That was unbelievable,” she said taking Paige into her arms and kissed her on the mouth. The crowd was still celebrating seeing someone who had just hit a hole in one and no one seemed to care what they had done.

  “Getting brave there, sweetheart,” Paige said tapping Jules on the stomach.

  “I’m sorry. I just got so excited.”

  Paige knew that tomorrow’s paper and internet would undoubtedly have a photo of them kissing, but at least they would talk about the tournament. “It’s okay, sweetie.”

  The hole in one had rattled the leaders and by the eighteenth hole it was Jules and Paige’s tournament to lose. When Paige knocked her ball into the hole, the tournament was over. Jules stood back and watched Paige toss her putter up in the air before she came over to Jules and pulled her in for a fierce hug. “We did it. We did it, Jules.”

  “You did it, honey.” She began to clap along with the rest of the crowd. Jules spotted her sister and Paige’s parents who were brimming with pride for their daughter. Jules put her arm around Paige’s waist and led her over to the waiting crowd. “She is a fantastic golfer, isn’t she?” Jules asked, pointing at Paige. The cheers went up again and Paige was pulled into the crowd by family.

  “I’m proud of you too,” Eileen said pulling her sister into her body. “You both were wonderful.”

  *

  Jules had already showered and changed by the time Paige came into the clubhouse. “Your parents are expecting us in less than an hour.”

  “I know. I’m just going to change my shoes and we can go,” Paige answered softly.

  “Is everything all right?” Jules asked looking at Paige’s face. She nodded smiling and opened her locker. “Did someone say something to you?” not believing that everything was fine. Paige’s face told her there was something wrong, but she couldn’t imagine what it was.

  “I’m fine, honey.” Paige picked up her duffle. “Let’s get out of here,” she said putting her arm through Jules’s arm.

  When they walked into the backyard, they saw the banner that hung up congratulating them on their win. A glass of champagne was pushed into each of their hands and Paige’s dad began to speak. “We are all so proud of both of you and what you both accomplished. We know how hard you both worked to make this happen. To Paige and Jules.” He finished by holding up his glass before everyone cheered. “Speech,” he then called out.

  Paige looked at Jules who nodded for her to speak. “First of all, we’d like to thank everyone for their support over these last few months,” Paige said as she threaded her fingers through Jules’s hand. “I know Jules doubted we could win despite her encouraging me the whole time.” Everyone giggled. “I couldn’t have done this without her,” she said turning to Jules. “You made me feel whole again. I didn’t feel like the handicapped girl who could no longer do what she loved so much.” Paige held up her glass. “I love you, Jules.”

  “I love you too, Paige,” Jules said shyly in front of everyone. “Thank you for giving me the courage to even try something like this. It was hard work. Very hard work,” she said wiping her brow, which caused the group to laugh again. “I think in the future I would just like to play golf for the fun of it.” She smiled. “I’ll leave the tournaments to you. To Paige.” She held up her glass and cl
inked it with her. Paige leaned over and without a care that everyone was watching, kissed Jules softly. “I love you.”

  Paige pulled her into her body. “I love you too.”

  “When you two are done, can we eat?” Kelly asked, which again caused the crowd to laugh.

  Paige and Jules looked sheepishly at each other and giggled. “I guess they’re hungry.”

  Jules climbed into bed determined to find out what Paige was avoiding telling her. “Please tell me what you are afraid to say to me.”

  Paige rolled over on top of her. “Talking is the last thing I want to do right now.” She used her strong thighs to spread Jules open to her. “I want to show you how thankful I am for what you did for me.” Her core pressed firmly onto Jules’s and all thoughts of speaking were out the window.

  CHAPTER 18

  The sun was high in the sky when Jules first opened her eyes. The two women made love most of the night and only fell asleep early this morning. Paige made love to her with such emotion that it took Jules’s breath away. The way her hands moved over her body it was as if Paige was fearful of never feeling her skin again. She sat up bringing her knees to her chest and looked down at her sleeping lover. “What are you hiding from me?” Jules asked softly before moving off the bed quietly. She had just stepped into the shower when the door opened. “Morning,” Jules called out.

  “Morning.” Paige slid off the wheelchair onto the stone seat. Her hands now wrapped around Jules pulling her close to her body. “My body is sore, but I feel wonderful.”

  Jules turned into her body. “You should have slept a little longer.”

  “I couldn’t. I felt for you and you were gone,” she said pulling Jules to her again.

  “Come on. I think you need a shower to get rid of the cobwebs today,” Jules said pointing to Paige’s head.

  “I’m not sure it will help.”

  “How about I make us some breakfast and then you can lay down on the couch.”

  “Will you join me?”

  Jules kissed the top of her head. “Of course.” She wanted to grill Paige and find out what was going on, but for now she would let it go.

  Breakfast and the two cups of coffee didn’t seem to perk Paige up so Jules sent her to the couch while she cleaned up. “Save a place for me,” Jules said to Paige’s retreating back.

  “I will.”

  When Jules walked into the living room, Paige patted the spot in front of her. She laid down and Paige wrapped her arm around her middle making sure she was touching skin. “I hope you know how much I love you.”

  “I love you too, but I wish you would tell me what you are afraid to tell me.” Jules turned over so she was looking at Paige. “It can’t be that bad, baby.” She now watched as Paige opened and closed her mouth, but nothing came out. “Are you having second thoughts about us?” Jules had to ask because the more Paige held back, the more she feared the worst.

  Paige sat up quickly. “Of course I am not having second thoughts. Why would you think that?”

  “Because you have something to tell me and you can’t find the words. I’m scared Paige,” her sigh was loud and she took Paige’s hands. “Please tell me.”

  Paige’s head nodded up and down. “Arthur told me that I’ve been invited to play a tournament in San Diego.”

  Jules began to laugh. “Is that what you have been afraid to tell me?” Paige nodded. “Why would you scare me like that?”

  “You aren’t angry?”

  “No. I’ll miss you, but I’m not angry.”

  “Suppose one tournament turns into more tournaments?” Paige asked softly as she looked away.

  “Are you telling me you are going back on tour?” The fear that had dissolved in Jules’s body was returning. She knew if Paige went back on tour, they would never see each other.

  “I don’t know,” she admitted. “I honestly don’t know, Jules, but I don’t want to lose you.” Tears were now forming in her eyes and she desperately tried to keep them from falling.

  Jules could see her eyes flooded with tears and pulled her close to her body. “You aren’t going to lose me, Paige.” She now held Paige’s chin in her hand. “Never.”

  “You say that now, but when I’m gone for two months,” Paige let out a long breath and lowered her voice, “you may not feel the same way.”

  Jules knew she was right. They could end up spending more time apart than being together, but she didn’t want to admit her fears to the woman she loved.

  “You can come with me,” Paige said hopefully.

  “Honey, I have a job. I just can’t go off with you on tour. Maybe I can meet you for some long weekends, but I can’t promise you more than that.”

  Paige lowered her head in defeat. “I know.” She knew Jules couldn’t just ignore her job and traipse around the country to be with her.

  “When do you leave?” Jules asked trying to keep disappointment out of her voice.

  “Thursday afternoon. The tournament is this weekend and I have to be there Friday.” Paige took Jules hand. “You could come with me for the weekend.”

  “Paige, I have to be at school on Monday. We have meetings and I have to get set up for the new school year.”

  “I’m going to miss you,” she said cupping Jules’s face.

  “I’m going to miss you too.” Jules knew they would need to take advantage of the next three days before Paige left for the West Coast. “Will you be back on Monday?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  CHAPTER 19

  Jules and Paige spent the next three days together before she had to leave for the airport. “Text me when you land.”

  “I will,” Paige said, and they kissed one more time before they both walked outside.

  Jules walked into an empty house a short while later. Alice was still at camp and Eileen was working. She climbed the stairs and dropped onto the mattress in her room. The tears came quickly to her eyes and before she knew it, she cried herself to sleep.

  Someone stroking her hair forced Jules’s eyes opened. “Hi,” Eileen said smiling down at her. “Paige left?”

  Jules nodded. “Yeah. Earlier this afternoon.” Eileen stroked her head again. “I just found her and now I feel like I’ve lost her.”

  “It’s only one tournament, Jules.”

  “I have a feeling that it won’t be just one tournament.” Jules sat up against the headboard.

  “Did you tell her how you felt?” Eileen asked looking at her sister’s red eyes.

  “No. This is important to Paige. I know she has felt like a failure the last two years. She needs this Eileen, and I couldn’t take that away from her.”

  “Even if it means your unhappiness?” Eileen asked brushing her sister’s hair with her fingers.

  “Yeah. No matter how much I am hurting, I would never do that to her.” Jules meant every word she said to Eileen, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t going to miss Paige. After spending months together, she was going to miss Paige more and more as time went on.

  “Paige will be back, Jules. Don’t lose faith.”

  A few minutes later, Jules’s phone indicated a text. “In San Diego. Call you later.” She turned the phone to show Eileen.

  “See. You’ll speak with her later and maybe have phone sex,” she said standing and left the room.

  “Funny, Eileen.” But then she thought they might have to resort to that if Paige didn’t get back here for a while.

  That afternoon, Jules’s friend Lisa called. Her voice showed her excitement. “Jules, I just heard that you and that golfer won the tournament.”

  “We did,” Jules answered just as excited. “That golfer is Paige and she’s my girlfriend.”

  “That’s great, Jules. I’m throwing a birthday party for Pam this Saturday. Please come and bring her with you.”

  “She’s in California,” she said losing her enthusiasm.

  “For what?”

  “A golf tournament.”

  “Then you come.
All our friends will be there.”

  “I’m not sure, Lisa.”

  Lisa was beginning to lose her patience. “What, are you going to sit around and do nothing until she comes home?”

  She and Pam had been married for two years now and even though they had a wonderful relationship, they still had to party as if they were single.

  Reluctantly, Jules mumbled, “Okay, Lisa. I’ll be there.”

  “Good. See you at seven.”

  *

  Jules heard a noise in her sleep and couldn’t imagine what it was. She rolled over toward the night table and saw her phone dancing on the surface. “Hello,” she said half asleep.

  “I’m sorry baby, for waking you up.”

  “Paige?” Jules asked sitting up.

  “It’s me.”

  “What did you do today?” she asked finally awake.

  “Meet and greet stuff.”

  “Are you nervous about tomorrow?” Jules rubbed her eyes and yawned.

  “Yes. I should let you get back to sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow evening.”

  “Okay.” Then Jules realized she won’t be home. “I won’t be home.”

  “Hot date?”

  “No. It’s Pam’s birthday and I’m going over to their house for her party.”

  “Oh, okay.” Paige suddenly became quiet before she said, “Don’t replace me with another woman.”

  Jules chuckled, “Like anyone could compare to you, honey.”

  “You are so sweet. I guess I better let you go back to sleep.” Paige sighed heavily. “I love you, Jules.”

  “I love you too, Paige. I can’t wait to see you and honey, you’ll do fine tomorrow.”

  CHAPTER 20

  Jules walked into the party and greeted her hosts. “It’s been too long, Jules. Where have you been hiding?” Pam asked of her friend.

  “Playing golf,” she answered with a smile.

  “I know. We heard you won that tournament and you’re dating the cute golfer too.”

  “Yeah. She’s pretty special to me,” Jules easily admitted to her friend.