The Doctor’s Secret Baby

by Teresa Southwick

  She tapped her lip. “There’s an asthma education program at the clinic where Henry and Oscar go. It’s run by a pediatric pulmonologist. He does lung volume screenings as well as instruction for the parents or caregivers on how to deal with the illness so that the child can lead as normal a life as possible.”

  Cal nodded. “Who’s the doc?”

  “Nick Damien.”

  “I’ve worked with him. He’s good.” He thought for a moment. “Is there any cost?”

  It was her job to know what programs and services were available in the community to meet the patient’s needs when they left the hospital. Discharge planners were assigned to follow each admit to make sure care was given in a timely fashion to eliminate unnecessary cost. Because of Helping Hands and the girls she mentored, she had an even more personal knowledge of this particular program.

  “The doc, and whatever staff he brings in, donate their time and it’s a free clinic. I’ll check into it further and speak with the parents for you.”

  “Good.”

  “All right, then, I’ll get right to it.” She started to turn away and felt his hand on her arm.

  “Wait, Em.” He removed his fingers from her skin and curled them into his palm. “Since you’re here, there’s something else I’d like to run by you.”

  “Okay. Sure.” She sounded like a nervous schoolgirl. Too eager. Too adoring. A puppy too anxious to please. It was that darn kiss. The good news was that she hadn’t collapsed into bed with him, like the very first time he’d kissed her. The bad news? She had desperately wanted to collapse into bed with him.

  He folded his arms over his chest and leaned against the high desk. “Look, I know you don’t like the idea of moving into my house with Annie. But I’ve been thinking. What if I—”

  “Don’t even say it,” she said, holding up a hand. “You can’t live with us. How would that look? What kind of example would that set for the girls? It’s out of the question.”

  “Okay.” He blinked at her. “Actually I was going to ask how you’d feel about me throwing Annie a first birthday party. A family party. At my house.” He watched her reaction for several moments before adding, “You shouldn’t feel bad about thinking the worst of me.”

  “Why?”

  He ran a finger down her hot cheek, just to show he didn’t miss the embarrassment. “It will work in my favor.”

  “Oh?”

  “When you feel guilty about going to the bad place, I’ll probably get what I really wanted in the first place.”

  “You think so?”

  “Before you say no, at least think about it.”

  He was probably right, because she had a lot to feel guilty about and owed him. But letting down her guard wasn’t easy. “This is all a big adjustment, considering that contrary to what you told me there really is a circumstance that would compel you to commit.”

  He blew out a breath and rested his hands on lean hips. “How much longer are you going to punish me for saying that?”

  “Just stating the truth. We both made mistakes. But we have Annie to think about and I don’t want to make any more where she’s concerned. The thing is that I’d sort of figured to celebrate Annie’s first birthday with the girls and their kids. Oscar and Henry aren’t related by blood, but she’s close to them.”

  “Lucy and Patty could come with the boys,” he offered. “I’d also like to ask my folks. And my brother. I know it’s probably not a good idea to overwhelm Annie with everyone at once, but since I’ve been making progress, I’ve been thinking that it’s time she met her grandparents and the rest of her family.”

  Wouldn’t that be fun? she thought. His E.R. manager already wanted to cut her heart out with a spoon and Em could only imagine how his parents felt. But Annie should know her whole family. “I really think that’s—”

  “Look, Em,” he said, an irritated expression sliding into his eyes. “If you can keep finding speed bumps to the idea, I’m not opposed to playing the guilt card. I’ve missed out on a lot with Annie this first year of her life and so have my folks. They’d like to meet their granddaughter.”

  “Now who’s going to the bad place? I was just going to say that it’s a good idea. Annie deserves to meet everyone on your side of the family.”

  “Okay, then.” He nodded as the tension seemed to drain out of him. “I’ll get back to you with the details.”

  “Sounds good.” Yeah, right. It wasn’t easy to let him back in when she’d reconciled herself to the fact that he didn’t want her or any responsibility that might come along with her. For Annie’s sake she had to try. “Now I better go meet with your patient’s family.”

  “Yeah.” He started to lead the way to the trauma bay before turning back to her. “Do you have an appointment for your ultrasound yet?”

  She nodded. “Right after Annie’s birthday.”

  “That’s two weeks. They can’t get you in sooner?”

  “The department is busy and I can’t say I’m sorry to wait. Rebecca said two weeks won’t impact the outcome, especially if it’s benign as she suspects. If it’s bad news, I don’t want to know before Annie’s big day. I’d rather be the queen of denial.”

  “All right,” he said, uncertainty dark in his eyes.

  He’d always wanted to fix things, and she recognized the impulse now in the look on his face. The expression was enough to send her to a place where Cal actually cared. Probably he did, but only because she was the mother of his child. Oh, how she wished it could be about her in a very personal way. But somehow she’d have to resolve that feeling and stop hoping for more than she had a right to expect from him.

  Em turned left from Tropicana Avenue into Spanish Trail and stopped at the guard gate. After giving her name to the uniformed security guy, he checked his list and waved her through. She’d been feeling a huge, black dread about this day for the last two weeks, ever since she’d agreed to have Annie’s first birthday party at Cal’s place. On Sunday. With his family. What had she been thinking? It didn’t matter what she’d thought. There had been no choice and here she was, on her way to family day.

  There were a number of separate communities housed in this development—condominiums, all the way up to million-dollar houses. Cal had one of the latter and she knew it backed up to the golf course. Only the best for Mercy Medical’s resident playboy.

  After turning right, she navigated her way through the streets, remembering the route as if she’d visited only yesterday. The homes ranged from sprawling, stucco-covered ranch style to the lofty, two-story variety all fronted by sentinels of mature palm trees lining the streets. Her little compact, although in pristine condition and meticulously maintained, looked out of place when she passed driveways where Lexus, Mercedes and BMW vehicles lived. She’d been here many times, but had never before felt like the riffraff police would pull over and ask what she was doing there. It wasn’t necessary to be a shrink to understand that this feeling was more about seeing Cal’s family again.

  He’d have told them the whole story. Em was the one who’d neglected to tell him about his daughter and expected they were less than pleased with how she’d handled the situation. Maybe it was the guilt police she should watch for in her rearview mirror.

  She parked in front of his two-story, sprawling, white-stucco home with the red-tile roof. The expansive front yard was a combination of green grass and rocky desert landscaping, with a wooden bridge over a dry lake bed. It was perfect.

  Em went to the rear passenger side of the car and gently unbuckled a dozing Annie from her car seat.

  “Hey, big girl.” Em smiled as her little one rubbed her eyes. “I’m glad you had a power nap. It’s a big day for you. Not only are you a whole year old, you’re going to meet your grandparents and your uncle Brad.”

  “Da?” Annie’s big blue eyes opened wide.

  “Yes. Daddy will be here. This is his house.” The big, beautiful place where he wanted his daughter to live but Mommy had put a big, fa
t no on the idea. “Mommy has good reasons. You might not understand when you see the impressive interior. But my reasons made perfect sense at the time. You have to trust Mommy.”

  “Da?” Annie pointed a pudgy finger at the house.

  “Okay. We can do this.”

  Armed with a fully loaded diaper bag and her one-year-old daughter, Em marched up the driveway, past Cal’s folks economical SUV and his brother’s expensive, two-seater red Mercedes. Somehow she’d get through this, she thought, pulling on her emotional armor.

  Beside the huge, double doors with oval etched-glass inserts was a button that she pushed to ring the bell. Annie leaned over to imitate the action, but Em held on tight, and then the door opened and Cal was there.

  Annie blinked up at him and smiled. “Da?”

  “Hey, sunshine.” He held out his arms and the little girl eagerly went to him. He kissed her cheek as if he’d been doing it since the day she was born. “How’s my girl?”

  “Couldn’t be better,” Em answered for her.

  He looked past her. “Where are Patty, Lucy and the boys?”

  “They couldn’t make it.” Better to be vague than tell him what they really said. The invitation had pity written all over it and they’d feel uncomfortable. So Em was here without backup.

  “Too bad. Maybe another time. The kids would enjoy the pool.” He took the diaper bag, then backed up with Annie so she could come inside. “The folks are here.”

  “Yeah,” she said, a knot in her stomach. “I noticed.”

  She followed him through the imposing, two-story-high entryway that divided the formal dining and living rooms. The family room and kitchen combination had been her favorite part of the house. It had been love at first sight, not unlike the way she’d once felt about Cal.

  The remarkable amount of space didn’t make the room any less inviting. A granite-covered island as big as a small country dominated the kitchen, which had a stainless-steel refrigerator, oven and dishwasher. Separating this from the family room was a bar with six stools. The walls were two-tone olive green with white chair rail dividing the light shade on top from the darker one on the bottom.

  A big, overstuffed brown leather corner group filled one corner in front of a large-screen plasma TV. Neutral beige carpet flowed throughout the house making the already extraordinary floor plan seem even more spacious. The rectangular mahogany coffee table held a pile of presents in pink birthday paper.

  Carol and Ken Westen were standing in front of the bar, with Brad beside them. Cal’s brother was eighteen months younger and maybe an inch shorter, but still more than six feet tall with dark blond hair and blue eyes. Both of the Westen boys had gotten the cleft in their chins from Dad. Brad was just as good-looking as Cal, in an edgier, cockier way.

  “Hello, Emily.” Carol smiled, but it was tense around the edges. The boys had gotten their sandy blond hair from her, although mom’s was lighter, thanks to regular coloring and highlights.

  “Nice to see you again.” Ken held out his hand, and she put hers into it. The man’s hair was completely silver but only made him look more distinguished. He was probably in his late fifties but looked far younger and still handsome, a glimpse of how gracefully Cal would age. Probably his brother, too.

  Brad cleared his throat. “Em,” he said.

  “Hi.” She couldn’t go wrong being succinct and polite.

  She’d met Cal’s family on numerous occasions. She knew how warm they could be and keenly felt the absence of it now.

  “This is Annie,” Cal said, grinning proudly.

  “She’s beautiful.” Carol’s blue eyes grew soft, tender and teary. “Cal says you named her after me and your mother.”

  Em nodded. “That’s right. Ann Marie.”

  “Do you think she’ll come to me?” Carol asked.

  “She’s a little shy at first,” Cal said. “I had to bribe her. My daughter has a definite materialistic streak.”

  Em glanced around the room and its expensive furnishings. “And who do you think she gets it from?”

  Brad laughed. “She’s got you there, bro.”

  Carol held out her arms to her granddaughter and smiled warmly. “Hi, sweetheart. Will you let grandma hold you?” Annie went to her without hesitation and the older woman cuddled her close. “She’s completely adorable.”

  Cal looked puzzled. “How come she didn’t cry for you?”

  “I think it’s a guy thing,” Em said. “She’s a little standoffish with men.”

  “Way to go, Annie,” Cal said. Uncle Brad and his father nodded approvingly.

  “Do you think she’d like to go in the pool?” Carol asked.

  “She loves her bath,” Emily said, noticing for the first time that everyone was dressed for swimming, the older woman wearing a cover-up over her one-piece suit. “I brought her bathing suit and sunscreen and a hat.”

  Cal handed his mother the diaper bag. “Go for it, Mom.”

  “Is it all right with you, Emily?”

  “Of course.”

  After getting Annie ready, Carol carried her outside followed by Cal and his brother. From where she stood, Em could see the crystal-clear pool, wrought-iron fence and the golf course with lake beyond. She followed more slowly to give them some space and took a padded chair in the shade of the patio cover complete with misters.

  Ken offered her a cold drink, then sat beside her. “How’ve you been, Emily?”

  “Fine. And you?”

  “Good. Carol’s been after me to slow down. She wants to do some traveling so I’ve added another doctor to my practice.”

  She knew his specialty was internal medicine. Both of his sons were doctors, but each had chosen different fields. “Do you have any trips planned?”

  “We’re taking a cruise to Alaska. Always said we wanted to go where it was cold when Vegas was hotter than the face of the sun.”

  Em wouldn’t have thought it possible, but she laughed. “When are you going?”

  “In September. We’re flying to Juneau, catching the boat for a repositioning cruise that goes to San Diego and winds up in L.A.”

  He was watching his wife bounce the laughing baby in the pool while Cal and Brad stood by like vigilant guardians. Em had to admit that Annie’s father was really something. Tall, tan, fit and fine. His broad shoulders tapered to a trim waist and flat belly. The dusting of hair on his chest brought back memories of twisted sheets and tantalizing touches. Her heart skipped once, then speeded up and suddenly she was hotter than the face of the sun.

  She swallowed and pushed the image from her mind. Focus, she told herself. “The trip sounds wonderful.”

  “Not as wonderful as finding out we have a grandchild.”

  She glanced at him and didn’t see hostility. “Yes, sir, about that. If you’ll let me explain—”

  “Cal told us.”

  “Everything?”

  “He said you raised the subject of children and he cut you off with a speech about going it alone.”

  “That’s the truth, Mr. Westen.”

  “You sound surprised.”

  “I guess I am. I wouldn’t blame Cal if he embellished and painted me in a bad light.”

  “Cal’s a stickler for the truth, even if he doesn’t get the sympathy vote on this one. And you used to call me Ken,” he reminded her.

  “That was before I didn’t tell your son he was a father. But,” she added, “I had my reasons.” She glanced at him. “In my past, there are some things I—I’d rather not talk about.”

  “I understand.” He nodded. “And you’ll understand that Cal has a past, too.”

  Em held the soda can tightly in her hands and felt the aluminum give way. “Doesn’t everyone?”

  “Some more than others.” He met her gaze. “Did he tell you about his marriage?”

  Cal married? Mercy Medical’s playboy had once taken the plunge? He’d only told her he wasn’t married and she’d assumed that meant he’d never tied the knot. “No. He
never mentioned it.”

  Ken took a sip of his soda. “That doesn’t surprise me.”

  “Why?”

  “Since he’s no longer married, you can assume it didn’t go well,” he said wryly.

  “What happened?” She wanted to ask what the woman had done to him that made him avoid commitment like radioactive fallout. It would explain a lot about why he’d shut her down tight as a high-rise during a bomb threat.

  “The fact that he didn’t say anything to you would imply that it’s still too painful for him to talk about.” Ken met her gaze. “I’ve probably said too much already. It’s Cal’s story to tell. Or not.”

  She nodded even though curiosity was clawing through her. She looked at Cal, taking Annie from his mom and lifting her high to make her giggle, then lowering her slowly into the water where she splashed happily. Clearly when he’d said nothing could compel him to commit, he hadn’t meant a child.

  “I should have told him anyway,” she said softly. “I—I didn’t mean to hurt him. Or you. And Mrs. Westen.”

  “We were surprised. And hurt that we missed her beginning.” Ken looked over and his expression was filled with gentle censure. “But for Annie’s sake we all need to put that behind us and move forward.”

  “Can you?” she asked.

  “Time will tell.”

  “Fair enough.”

  And she sincerely meant that.

  Em had expected animosity and accusation but Cal’s family was trying. And she could tell by the way they looked at Annie that it was love at first sight with the little girl. Cal’s little girl. The child of their child.

  A peace swept over her for the first time since she’d found the lump. If anything happened to her she knew Annie would be loved and cared for. No matter what happened, her little girl would have the family that Emily had only ever been able to dream about.

  Among other dreams. One of which was kissing Cal again even though it was a red-flag warning of fire danger. Telling him the truth had eliminated her worry about Annie’s future. Unfortunately it was replaced by concern about her own and how in the world she would handle him being in her life again.