by Megan Smith
“I think we both needed that.” She says wiping the tears from her eyes. “First things first, we get you and your sister food. Where is she by the way?”
“School.”
“Will she be home soon?”
I tap the screen on my phone to check the time. “She’ll be home in about an hour.”
“Okay, let’s run out to the store now before she gets back. Then you need to figure out if you want to take Eli up on his offer to move in or I could call Cooper and ask if he would mind you taking over one of his bedrooms until you can get up on your feet.”
She’s right, I have a decision to make and honestly I don’t know what to do. On one hand I feel like it might be a better idea to stay with Jaylinn at Cooper’s but then I feel like I’m imposing on them even though he’s not around much. I don’t want to bring them into my messy life when they just got back together. And on the other hand I could move in with Eli and rent a room from him. He did say he was looking for a roommate. I’m afraid to take the chance with him. What if we can’t stand each other. Then I would be back to square one and I just don’t think I could mentally handle that.
Jaylinn elbows me in the arm. “You’re lost in thought over there.”
“I am.”
“Let’s figure it out together.” She gets this evil smile on her face and I already know where she is going to steer this conversation. “Cooper’s house, you’d have to put up with me, you’d have to share a bedroom with your sister but he’s not going to charge you rent. Once I tell him what’s going on he’s going to refuse.”
“I’m not doing that. If we stay there we’re paying.”
Jaylinn smiles triumphantly. “Then you just picked.”
I narrow my eyes at her. “You did that on purpose.”
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
Jaylinn pats me on the leg. “Let’s agree to disagree. We need to go though so we’re back in time for Fallon. I’m dying to meet her now.”
“She’s a good kid.”
“If she’s anything like you, I’m sure she is.”
On our ride to the grocery store I bring up the fact that if I still do have a job and Eli still has his roommate offer open I’m going to need help with Fallon. I will need help taking her back and forth to school and someone to watch her on the nights I have to work.
“You can borrow my car. You have a license, right?”
I pick up a can a soup that’s on sale and place it in the cart. “Yeah, Brian took me for my test.”
“Well, at least he was good for something.”
Jaylinn added in those microwavable containers of macaroni and cheese and tosses them in the cart. When she turns her head I quickly fish them out and put them back on the shelf but she catches me.
“What are you doing?”
I grip the handle of the cart and whisper, “I can’t afford those.”
“Who said they were for you?” She grins.
I place them back in the cart then following her down the next aisle.
“So back to what we were talking about, Cooper isn’t using his car. I’ll leave you mine and I’ll take his.” She winks. “I love his and now I have an excuse to use it.”
“You sure you’re okay with that? It’s not too much trouble?” The guilt from asking for help is getting to me. I feel like a freeloader.
“I wouldn’t have offered if it was. Anyway, on the nights you have to work I’ll babysit. I’ve always wanted a little sister. Hunter wouldn’t let me braid his hair when we were little.”
I giggle. Hunter with braids I’d pay to see that.
I’ve just about used up the twenty dollars I have so I just follow Jaylinn around until she’s done. We pay, I had just enough thankfully, loaded the car and headed to Fallon’s school to pick her up. When we pull up in front of the school, Fallon is waiting in her normal place but she doesn’t see me until I get out of Jaylinn’s car.
“Squirt, how was your day?”
She clings to my side as I open the back door of Jaylinn’s car for her to climb in. “Who’s that?” she whispers.
“That is my friend Jaylinn.”
“Hi, Fallon,” Jaylinn turns in her seat to greet her.
“Hi,” she says shyly.
“Did you have fun at school today?” Jaylinn asks as I buckle her in.
Fallon nods. She’s always so shy around strangers.
“That’s good.” Jaylinn reaches into one of the bags we put on the back seat and grabs a fruit snack. “Are you hungry?”
Fallon looks at me and I smile hoping that gives her the courage she needs to say yes.
“Yes, please.”
Jaylinn beams at me when I climb back in the car. Fallon and I chat about what she did today at school and how her lunch was. Jaylinn pulls into the same parking spot as she did earlier. The three of us climb out, Fallon runs over to the door while Jaylinn helps me with my bags. I point out which bags are mine but she grabs some of hers, too.
“Those aren’t mine.” I point out to another bag she grabs.
“I know.”
I narrow my eyes. What the hell is she doing?
Jaylinn shut the trunk that is now empty and follows after Fallon. We bring all the stuff upstairs and into the kitchen. Fallon sits on the couch and starts to go through her book bag. I start unpacking my bags and Jaylinn does the same.
“Okay, seriously, what are you doing?”
“What does it look like?”
“Like you’re unpacking your bags.”
Jaylinn pats me on the head. “You’re quick.”
“Those are yours. Do you plan on staying here or something?”
“Yeah, I don’t want the stuff to thaw out. I’ll just leave the other stuff in the bags until I’m ready to go.”
I just nod because she’s acting really weird.
Once we are all finished we take a seat beside Fallon. I flick the tv on and pray that it still turns on. The cable bill was one of the bills I actually got to pay before mom stole my money.
Jaylinn clears her throat. “Why don’t you go make that phone call?”
My stomach instantly knots and my hands get clammy. “Um, yeah, okay.”
I find my phone and walk back to my bedroom for a little privacy. I pace back and forth a few times before finally just hitting the call button.
The phone barely rings once before Eli answers. “Layla?”
“Um, yeah, it’s me. Is this a bad time? I, uh, could call back later.”
I sound like an idiot.
“No, it’s okay. I was hoping you would call.”
“Look, I’m sorry about what happened last week. You just took me by surprise and I shouldn’t have thrown you out. I know you were only trying to help.” I rush out before I lose my nerve to do so.
Eli sighs. “No reason to be sorry. I’m the one who is sorry. I just wanted to fix everything and I didn’t mean to hurt you by doing so.”
“I know and I understand. I’ve just kept this side of me a secret for so long that I wasn’t sure how to handle the situation. Anyway, I was calling to see if I still had a job.”
Without missing a beat he says, “You’ll always have a job here, Layla.”
Whew. “Great, thank you. One other thing,” I hesitate. “Um, are you still looking for a roommate?”
“Yeah I’m not in a huge rush to find one. Like I said, I was looking around but honestly I haven’t given it much time or effort.”
I bit down on my bottom lip. I just need to bite the bullet and ask. “Would you be willing to have Fallon and I? I promise we won’t cause you any problems and it’ll only be for a few months until I can get on my feet.”
“Yes,” Eli practically shouts in my ear. “Sorry, yes, I’d love for it to be you guys.”
“Great, well as you know I don’t have any money and I’ve been out of work. I could work a few days, hopefully get some tips so that I can pay for a down payment.”
“Layla, there is no
down payment.”
“I’m not moving in there if there isn’t one. You can’t move in anywhere without having one.”
“Calm down, we’ll figure something out okay. How about one hundred dollars?”
I mentally tally up that I could do that with ease just working a weekend and I’d have a little extra left over. “Okay, but are you sure that’s enough? I don’t want you to treat me any differently than you would anyone else.”
He chuckles. “It’s plenty and I’d charge anyone that amount. Honestly I don’t really need the money, my house is paid off. I just was really looking for a roommate for the company.”
“You’re going to have a six year old on your hands; you’ll have all the company you’ll need and may be begging for peace and quiet again.”
He laughs and I can’t help but laugh too.
We chat for a little while longer. We worked on getting me back on the schedule. I told him that I filled in Jaylinn with what’s been going on and that she’s going to be helping me with Fallon on the nights I have to work. Eli also offered to help any time he could and that just made me sit back for a second and realize what a great guy he really is. Eli and I talked about getting Fallon and I moved in as soon as possible, too. When everything was worked out we said our goodbyes.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can finally breathe. Maybe that dark cloud will finally go away and a rainbow will take its place. Maybe, just maybe.
Eli
Life is good. Nah, life is great.
It’s been almost two months since Layla and Fallon moved in. It was a little uncomfortable for a while but we settled into a routine that works for all of us. The late night screams from one of the girls falling into the toilet after me leaving the lid up was causing some problems. All the girly stuff in the bathroom, hell, the whole house, took some getting used to. Don’t get me wrong I was used to it from growing up with my sister but this was nothing I’ve ever seen before. Now when I came home from work I didn’t just sit down and try to catch a ball game on TV, nope, now it’s playing Barbie dolls with Fallon. When I’m not doing that, I’m cooking dinner, something I rarely ever did.
Fallon is, according to Layla, the happiest she’s ever been. Her teachers even mentioned it to Layla as well. Jaylinn, I think, has adopted her as a little sister. They always have ‘girl’s night’ where they stink up the living room of nail polish and smelly perfume shit, braid each other’s hair and talk about boys. I don’t like that part, not one fucking bit. Layla rolls her eyes at me when I’m glaring at Jaylinn for bringing it up. I swear she does it just to get a rise out of me.
Layla’s mom is still missing. Layla has called around to all the different hospitals in the area, all the rehabs nearby, and has checked all the places she could think of. She also checks in at Jax’s all the time hoping she’ll come back around but, so far, no luck.
Layla has gone back to school. She explained to the counselor what was going on and they worked everything out. Instead of going full time like she was, she is now doing part time. It’ll take her twice as long to finish her degree but it’s the way it needs to be, for now at least. She was even able to keep her full scholarship, too.
Brian has gone missing. Hasn’t been heard from since he left that day I showed up over at Layla’s apartment. This doesn’t sit well with me at all. If it was up to me I would have hired a bodyguard for Layla but she wouldn’t have it. She said that he’s not even going to school anymore either. Something is definitely up with that. We also got her a new phone under my plan, actually I got it, I didn’t give her a choice in the matter; this way he couldn’t call her and he didn’t have a cell phone bill to hold over her head to make her feel guilty.
I snooped around a few times and found out what the cost of Layla’s electric, gas and rent was for the apartment. I took that amount, divided it in half and timed it by the number of months they were together. I’ve got money set aside in a bank account for her to give him back all the money he’s ever given to her. Layla doesn’t know that and she never will. The only one who does is Erin.
When Layla and Fallon first moved in I invited Erin and Sophia over for a little bar-b-que. All the girls hit it off great.
“I like her.” Erin said to me while we were washing the dishes one night after Layla cooked for us. “She’s got you all domesticated now.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Why, because I’m doing the dishes? I’ve always done them.”
“Nope not just the dishes, you cook, clean, always make sure they have everything before you worry about yourself.” Erin said as she took a plate to rinse it off. “And you have this smile on your face that never goes away.”
Sitting here on the back deck at my house while I’m watching Fallon and Sophia in the pool a few weeks later makes me realize that maybe Erin is right. Every single time I look at Layla or Fallon I can’t help but smile.
“Hey, can you throw these on the grill for us?” Erin asks as she hands me a plate of hamburgers and hot dogs. It’s a Saturday afternoon and Erin brought Sophia over for a swim before Layla and I have to leave for work tonight.
“Yeah, sure.”
I walk over to the grill which is just under the kitchen window out back and still in view of the girls in the pool. I flip the lid and start to place the hot dogs and hamburgers down. I can hear Erin and Layla talking in the kitchen. I probably shouldn’t eavesdrop but I do anyway.
“You’re right when you mentioned how good Eli is with Sophia.” Layla says. “He’s really good with her and Fallon. The other day when the girls were playing out front, Eli had just got home from the store and before he even came in he took them out back and was blowing bubbles with them. Then he gave them each a Popsicle and helped them with their jump ropes all before he even made it inside with the stuff he bought.”
“He’s a good guy, Layla, one I’m proud to call my brother. I thought for a while he would never find someone who could make him smile and who would tie his ass down but you do that to him. He gets this look on his face whenever you’re around.” One of them turns on the faucet and it drowns out the rest of what my sister was saying.
The water turns off. “I just hope that we aren’t out welcoming our stay, you know? This can’t be easy for him to take on a girl and her sister, kind of like a ready-made family.”
I push open the lid of the grill and flip the burgers. I don’t know how many times I’ve told Layla that I want her here. I’m not sure how else to get it through her head.
“If there is one thing I know about my brother it’s this, if he didn’t want you around you wouldn’t be. Eli is a straightforward type of guy, he doesn’t do things just because it’s the right thing to do.”
“But I feel like I just dropped my life on him and it makes me feel a little guilty, I guess.”
“Have you told him that? I mean you are friends at the end of the day.”
“No, I haven’t but maybe I should.”
“Let me ask you something? Do you want a relationship with my brother one day?”
I’ve backed off trying to pursue a relationship with Layla because she doesn’t need to worry about that for now. I want her to get her life in order without having to involve me.
Layla doesn’t respond right away.
“Yeah, I would one day when I know I can stand on my own two feet.”
I can picture Erin staring at Layla the way she does to me when she’s about ready to challenge me. “What if you broke one of your legs? What would you do? Who would you lean on?”
There is some rustling around going on. I hope Erin is making my favorite potato salad.
“I don’t have anyone to lean on, I guess. I mean I have Jaylinn but she’s got Cooper.”
My sister is going in for the kill in one, two, three…
“And that’s no way to live, Layla. You should always have someone to lean on, even if it’s just someone to listen when you need a shoulder to cry on.”
&
nbsp; I walk away to grab my beer off the table that’s down by the pool. I don’t want to hear her answer. I don’t want it fucking with my head. My sister is right about needing someone to lean on. Everyone needs that. It’s also another reason why I haven’t taken things further with Layla. I want her to do this on her own terms, when she’s ready.
When I turn back around from grabbing my beer from the table Layla is standing by the grill with her hands on her hips.
“You heard all that didn’t you?” She asks shyly.
I nod. “Just a little of it.”
She comes over and wraps her tiny arms around my arm hugging it close to her. “Can we talk tonight after work?”
“Sure.” How could I ever say no to her?
Erin comes out of the house with a handful of food. “Girls, come, it’s time to eat.”
The five us sit down and eat on this perfect summer afternoon. I can’t picture doing anything other than this right here.
Later that night after Layla and I get home we’re sitting out on the back deck watching the sun rise. It’s a cool night, the water is lapping up against the dock and the crickets are chirping away.
“It’s so peaceful out here.” Layla sighs. “It’s one of my favorite things about this house.”
I kick my feet up on the chair across from me so that I can stretch out. “It’s what sold me on the house.”
Layla yawns and snuggles into the blanket she’s wrapped in. “I wonder what Erin did with the girls last night.”
I turn my head towards her. “Probably something crazy like always.” Every time Erin has the girls she does something fun with them. They’ve been to the boardwalk, the trampoline park, Build-a-Bear and she’s even taken them to get their nails done.
We’re both quiet for a while, content on watching the top of the sun rise just above the water. It starts to light up the sky. It’s starting a new day with new memories. We both should probably be sleeping but it’s these moments that I love with Layla.
“So you heard me and Erin talking earlier in the kitchen?” Layla asks.
I knew this conversation was coming and it was wrong to listen but I couldn’t not listen either. “Yeah, but like I said not all of it.”
