Sinners & Saints (Sinners & Saints #1)

by Ballinger, Chelsea

  We hold hands the whole trip. I even lay my head against his, falling asleep. He brushes his knuckles across my cheek to wake me up. I hate being woken up. I moan in frustration.

  “You’re drooling on my shirt.” I quickly open my eyes and sit up, wiping the drool from my mouth.

  “Sorry,” I say, “I tend to do that.”

  “So I’ve noticed.” He’s still looking at me in that way again. Like I’m adorable or something.

  We step out of the limo. I look around me at the property we have taken. It is an estate that looks like something from the 17th century. Limos and sports cars surround the property. There is another estate behind it to the right. Just as big.

  “Whose place is this?” I ask.

  “The Manhattan Women’s elite. Decades ago the originals bought this place to host parties,” Hugo answers. “They figured the men had their gentlemen’s clubs, why shouldn’t they have their own mansions and land?”

  “I like them already.”

  “Yoo hoo!” A short brunette comes our way in all white tennis gear and a clipboard. “Mr. Mandrake! Ms. Abbott, Ms. Montgomery, Mr. Nichols, and of course Ms. Spears.”

  Wait, how does she know my name?

  “Rene knows everything about everyone. Well, when it comes to these parties,” Jordana says.

  “Yes, it is my job to know everything about our guests so you can have a grand time. I even have pictures.” She flips over the clipboard to show—holy shit that’s my driver’s license headshot. “Now you all will be staying in the rooms in the west wing. I’ve already escorted Ms. Eleanor and her guest there. Also the Townsend family and Ms. Brayson will be staying in that section also.”

  “Oh, goodie.” I give Hugo a look.

  “These fine young gentlemen will carry your luggage.” She gestures to the six young men in all white.

  “Ooh!” Poppy hooks her arm through one of the boys’ arms and guides them to our luggage.

  Rene leads the rest of us into the estate. Already it seems to be a party as a half-naked girl in a bikini runs through the foyer. Slowly running behind her with a cane is an old Asian man.

  “I see you’re still going strong, Mr. Tamaki,” Cody says as we laugh.

  “Mr. Takami always brings a Playboy Bunny to these things,” Rene informs me.

  She guides up the grand staircase where people are smoking and drinking.

  “Hello, my lovelies,” Ms. Eleanor greets us while snogging Diego.

  Renee pulls out our keys each labeled with the room number. She gives us each one. Hugo grabs one of my bags out of my hand and follows me to my room.

  “You didn’t have to carry that.” I grab it from him once we get to my room. I toss it to the floor as he stands out in the hallway.

  “I wanted to,” he tells me in that way that keeps my hope conscious.

  “You did?” He’s not an idiot. He knows what I mean when I ask that.

  He waits a moment before asking. “Yes… Juliet…”

  “Well, isn’t this lovely?” Scarlett comes out of nowhere of course.

  “Don’t you have bad timing,” I say to her. She’s in a white bikini top and shorts. Of course her room is across from mine. Rebecca comes out after her and her face goes ill once she sees Hugo.

  “Hello,” Hugo greets her.

  “Hi,” she quickly says. “Scarlett, I’m gonna go to the lake.”

  “Okay,” Scarlett says smiling.

  I know Rebecca fancies Hugo, but the way she looked at him just now you would think he murdered her entire family.

  “Is she okay?” I ask.

  “She’ll be fine,” Scarlett says sharply. “I look forward to seeing you all tonight.” She smiles and walks away leaving a chill.

  “Is it me or does it get colder every time she comes within reach? Also is it me or was she speaking cryptically?”

  He’s still staring at her as she walks away.

  “Hugo? Hugo, did you want to tell me something?”

  He looks at me. “I told Scarlett about your scars.”

  Heart stops. Blood pressure rises.

  “Juliet, say something.”

  “Shit just got real,” I say. I usually say this when my feelings are really, really hurt.

  “I was… I was desperate.”

  “Desperate about what?”

  “About… about the way you make me feel.”

  “So you do a shitty thing like that?”

  “I’m sorry.” He comes closer. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He says it in a panic and I don’t know how I feel right now.

  “I’m not really shocked that you told her. Hurt, but not shocked. I’ll see you tonight.” I close the door on him and breathe.

  SCARLETT

  “He just said hi, like it was nothing. Why?” Rebecca has been going on and on about this interaction with Hugo. I’m trying to enjoy the sun and nature and all I can do is focus on her whining.

  “That’s what some guys do. Hugo is that guy.”

  “Scarlett… it’s not just that. I’ve been having nightmares where I see this blurred face and that person is on top of me and I…”

  “I take off my sunglasses and sit up on my beach towel. “What?”

  “I keep saying no and… I think I kept saying no that night.”

  Now, yes, pretending Hugo is the one who stole her virginity—that’s wrong, but I was angry and even I tend to do stupid but brilliant things when mad. It’s brilliant because Hugo crosses me again… I will destroy him and this is the way. But because it’s Hugo, I’ll make sure to keep it tamed for now. He’s a soft spot for me just like Gabriel was. I too gave him too many chances before he disappointed me. A part of me has faith that Hugo won’t.

  “Rebecca, you’re just imagining things. I’ve known Hugo for a very long time and he is not like that. A man whore, yes, but never in life would he do something like that, especially to a young girl such as yourself. Sometimes, Rebecca, when we make mistakes we try to force blame on others. We try to conjure up a different story that doesn’t basically say, ‘Hey, I was drunk and I had sex with a guy I shouldn’t have.’ That’s it.” I comb my fingers through her hair as she nods her head. “You’re okay. Just say hi and keep your distance. Next time you have sex, I guarantee you that it will be great… and memorable.”

  “Was that how it was for you? Your first time? Horrible then great?”

  I think back to it. His hands on my body, his smile, that cute heart shaped birthmark on his left inner thigh.

  “Yes. Exactly like that.”

  24

  HUGO

  The Century Ball has started and everyone is in the ballroom mingling. Everyone that’s anyone in New York comes. From the Senators to CEOs. This is where August and I were supposedly conceived. I stand in the entrance in my tailored black tux that has a dovetail. The normal men requirement. We’re to look as much like the upper class society from centuries ago as possible. Which includes gloves, mostly white or grey—mine are white to match my white pearl vest, button up, and bow tie. At least I don’t have on a top hat like most of them. I look to my right and see Scarlett in a red gown, of course. It covers the front, but reveals back from top to bottom. She always loves to show off her back. She approaches me in her red gown, pinned up blonde hair, and long white gloves.

  “You look dashing,” she says smiling.

  “And you still look ravaging.” I smile at her and she’s in a bit of a shock. “I take it as you aren’t angry at me anymore.”

  “I take your confidence as you’re not still acting like a pussy.”

  “Minor setback.”

  “Sure about that?”

  I don’t say anything. I hold my arm out. “Shall I escort you around?”

  She hooks her arm into mine. “You may.”

  “Where is the fiancé?” I ask as we walk through.

  “He’s in here somewhere, doing business of course.”

  “Leaving every man in here to eye fuck
you. If you were mine, I would make it hard for them.”

  “I am yours.”

  I stop and look into her eyes. “Do you truly believe that?” She walked right into this trap.

  “What?” She looks stunned.

  “You are never anyone’s Scarlett.”

  “What are you implying?”

  “I am only stating that… we are the ones that belong to you… you belong to no one.”

  Her face stiffens and she’s becoming uncomfortable. “You’ve been very off. Hell you just smiled at me and… so what, I like it that way. It keeps me in control… make sure everyone knows their place and the consequences of stepping out of bounds.”

  “What is ever my consequence for stepping out of bounds?” She looks around and smiles to herself.

  “Did you know Rebecca has a crush on you?”

  “Is that a trick question?”

  “Why haven’t you gone for her? You hate Patrick.”

  “Because she’s fifteen and… I don’t care. I don’t even hate Patrick. Why are you talking about this?”

  “You know how I got Patrick… I bared my soul to him. I told him about the things I had done and the things that were done to me. I told him things that I had never told you. How do you feel about that?”

  “Truth?”

  “Always.”

  “Hurt… but relieved.”

  Her jaw tightens. “Explain.”

  “It means hopefully in your own twisted way you actually care about him and that… I won’t have to worry about you.”

  “Why would you worry about me?”

  “I have always worried about you… I’m relieved that no matter what you will have someone.”

  “And what do you have? What do you really want to say to me, Hugo?”

  “Everything… because I’ve always cared for you. You’ve been an important person to me and you deserve to know that… things may change.” I’ve tried to practice speeches to give to the two women in my life, but it turns out the practice was a waste. “I told Juliet about my mother.”

  “So she tells you her sad secrets and you spill like that?”

  “No,” I shake my head. “I told her because I wanted to… Since you, I never have wanted to.”

  “So she has changed you.”

  “No, she hasn’t… she makes me want to, as stupid as it fucking is. I have the urge to express and share with her… to feel everything with her. Now I don’t know if I can ever be the person she wants me to…”

  “You can’t.”

  “Look, I am only telling you this out of respect and I can never take back the things I have told you about her.”

  “You’re worried I might out her.”

  “Yes.”

  “What will you do if I do? Seek revenge by destroying me and my Patrick and what? What would you do, Hugo?” She knows that if she does do harm to Juliet, I will want to seek revenge in every possible way. That’s how strong it is. “If you did do something horrible, it will just prove that you can’t change, Hugo. She would not be impressed with your disturbing behavior. And also… you could never truly choose between she and I… could you?”

  “Babe.” Patrick comes over with a gentlemen and his wife who I recognize as Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright. “I didn’t know you were here yet.” Patrick leans in, kissing her on the cheek then staring adorably at her like an ingrate. That was me earlier in the limo with Juliet.

  “Just got here, Hugo escorted me in.”

  He looks at me. “Hello Hugo.”

  “Patrick.” I look over to the Cartwrights. “Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright, lovely to see you.”

  They smile tightly at me. They’re still unforgiving for the time I was caught with their granddaughter and the housekeeper a few years back.

  “Scarlett, you look lovely, my dear,” Mrs. Cartwright compliments.

  “Thank you, you of course look eloquent.”

  “Hugo, where is your father by the way?” Mr. Cartwright asks.

  “Probably still trying to pick up his jaw off the floor.”

  He looks at me confused.

  They all start talking about something and Scarlett gives me a look. She still wants to finish our conversation, but I don’t know what else to say. I look away, searching for some type of escape until I lose my breath.

  “My God,” Mr. Cartwright mumbles.

  “Is that the Spears girl?” Mrs. Cartwright asks.

  “Um, yes.” Scarlett’s tone takes a turn for the worse, as it should. Juliet looks amazing. She is wearing a black dress. The front of it is a long V which she can get away with due to the lack of chest, but I’m okay with that now. The only jewelry she has on are diamond earrings. Her nails painted this dark grayish black. Her hair is pulled up into this messy do that works for her. God, she is just everything.

  “She is a looker,” Mr. Cartwright says.

  “You look to be an admirer, Hugo,” Patrick says to me amused. I look at him, the Cartwrights and a discouraged Scarlett. I look back at Juliet who has spotted me and slowly she smiles.

  “Excuse me,” I say as I walk towards her.

  My heart quickens once I reach her. Her eyes lower to what I’m wearing.

  “You really do fit out a suit, Mandrake.”

  I am still gazing at her. She laughs. “I take the silence as, ‘Yes, Juliet, you look stunning, radiant, magnificent. I just want to take you right here right now.’”

  My mouth twitches in amusement and I shake my head.

  “So, I’ve been thinking… I’ll let it go. I don’t need this night to be all about Scarlett knowing my darkest secrets. I was the idiot who told you.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “He speaks… it’s alright.”

  “No, it’s not.”

  “No, it’s not… but I don’t care,” she shrugs.

  Stuff right here makes me both want her and want to stay away from her. I don’t deserve her. Never have. I don’t think I ever will.

  “Juliet?” Nicky fucking Young is interrupting us. “My, you look of perfection.”

  “Thank you.” She blushes and I see red.

  “Young,” I say sharply.

  “Hey Hugo.” I normally don’t have a problem with Nicky Young, other than his over use of hair products, but I completely despise him at this moment and wish to do him bodily harm. “Juliet, I was wondering if you could accompany me in getting a drink at the bar?”

  “Uh…” She looks at me intently. “If it’s okay with Hugo.”

  “Sure.” What am I doing?

  The look on her face is asking me the same thing. She forces a smile and nods her head. “I’ll be with you in a moment, Nicky. I just need to finish telling Hugo something.”

  “Okay,” he smiles and she grabs my arm leading me a few feet away.

  “So I see we are still doing this.”

  “Doing what?” Annoyed, I ask.

  “You are such a stubborn bastard.”

  “And you are a tease.”

  “A tease? Are you serious? I? A fucking tease?”

  “So you’re telling me that you aren’t testing me right now?”

  “Of course I’m testing you. I just told you that I am willing to forgive you for betraying my trust and obviously by me saying if it’s okay with you, I meant I am your date you fucking twat. ”

  “I thought you weren’t into games anymore.”

  “Hugo, you are the most indecisive person I have ever met. I feel the urge to test you because I don’t want to experience a beautiful moment with you only to have you destroy it like that because you’re scared. Yes, I will keep throwing challenges at you until you fucking show me.”

  “Show you what?”

  “That you love me.”

  You know that feeling when a bomb explodes inside your chest? Yeah, me neither, but I think this might be it.

  “See,” She shakes her head. “Look at you. The mention of love and you shake and all I want to do is hold you. Well, you can shake some
more… I love you.” Her eyes jump and she looks down. “Shit, I can’t believe I just told you that.” She looks up at me in anger. “I really hate you for being the person you are and for somehow unintentionally getting me to fall for you. I’m in love with you. There it is. It’s all I have left to say now.”

  I continue standing still, unable to move and speak. I think I’m having a panic attack.

  “I’m going to pay attention to Nicky now... and if you have an epiphany where you realize it’s time to stop being a scared shit, then… you will know where to find me because you stare at me when you think I’m not aware. You look at me when I turn my back. You smile when I leave the room. I’m psychic, remember? Even though that doesn’t have anything to do with being psychic, if anything it would just mean I have eyes in the back of my head and maybe I’m a mind reader.”

  That causes me to faintly laugh.

  “See, that’s also why I love you. You think I’m funny and even though you try so hard not to show it, I can see it. You brood as easily as you lie… to yourself. Bye.”

  I watch as she walks away and I crack my neck at the sight of Nicky King’s hand on her waist as he leads her to the bar.

  I snatch a champagne glass off of a moving tray and walk over to the space where Jordana and Cody are standing. Ms. Eleanor is sitting at the table as Diego whispers sweet nothings in her ear and Poppy is flirting with one of the waiters. I stand between them and do what she knew I would do. I watch her. I completely strain my eyes watching her and Nicky Young laugh and flirt. She doesn’t even look my way. This is fucking bullshit; why do I have to do the work? She’s been on my dick since we met and now she wants to be I am woman, hear me roar?!

  Okay, that was rude. I shouldn’t of thought that.

  “Careful, Hugo… the steam is fuming out of you,” Jordana states, grinning at me.