Cast in Ruin
Page 16
Rachael felt the blood rush from her head. She clutched her free hand to her stomach as she tried to keep the little she’d eaten from rebelling. “How can you be certain? You said you don’t remember the events of that night?”
“I don’t. I was being truthful when I told you I remember little of the time I spent at Julia Bentley’s house party. I especially don’t remember attending the masked ball. Or what I would have worn. But I discovered that Covey brought the masks we’d need.”
“You asked him?”
Ben nodded in the affirmative. “Before we left London. I decided I wanted to know, so I went to see him. But when I got there, I realized I didn’t care. Claire is mine. Just as she’s yours. I felt a connection to her the moment I held her.” He cradled her hand closer to him. “Do you remember that first day in the garden when I held her?”
Rachael nodded.
“She fell asleep in my arms. She placed her head against my chest and fell asleep. It was her way of showing me how much she trusted me to protect her, and keep her safe. I knew at that moment that she was mine to care for and to love. I decided at that moment that it didn’t matter who had fathered her. Because I was her father. I would always be her father.”
Rachael couldn’t stop the tears from spilling from her eyes. Her heart expanded in her breast with an emotion so intense she couldn’t explain it. “Then how can you be certain that you are Claire’s father?”
“As I was leaving, Covey told me the mask I wore was that of a fox. I can’t tell you what hearing those words meant.”
Rachael lifted her napkin and dabbed the wetness from her cheeks. “You don’t have to tell me. I know how you felt. As I do now, just knowing that you are Claire’s father. Even though knowing so doesn’t matter. You’ve been her father since I married you. I needed you to be.”
Ben squeezed her fingers. “As I need Claire to be my daughter.”
Rachael didn’t think she could ever be happier than she was at this moment.
She’d never dreamed life could be so perfect.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Rachael watched as the shiny black Townsend carriage stopped in front of their home and the Ladies Winifred and Anne Waverley dismounted. Ben was there to greet his sisters, and Rachael waited on the portico until they climbed the two steps. When they were inside the house, she gathered first Winnifred, then Anne in warm embraces.
“I’m so glad you came to call,” she said, hooking her arms through both sisters’ arms and leading them to the room Rachael liked best. She called it the burgundy room because it was decorated in the warmest shades of burgundies and creams imaginable. She’d chosen it to entertain their first guests because it was the largest room on the main floor, and perfect to show off the house that she and Ben would call their home.
“Please, have a seat.” She ushered Winnie and Anne to one of the two matching burgundy and rose and pale green floral sofas that faced each other. She and Ben sat on the opposite sofa.
A low serving table separated the two matching sofas, and a tea tray sat in the center of the table, along with two round glass serving dishes, one with a variety of cakes and pastries, the other with small sandwiches. Rachael poured, then served the sandwiches and desserts.
“We’re ever so glad that you are living so close,” Winnie said after she’d taken a sip of her tea. “Townsend Manor is almost within walking distance of Meadowmont. The day will come when you and Ben tire of our presence,”
“That will never happen,” Rachael assured Ben’s sisters. “You are always welcome.”
Winnie was the older of Ben’s two sisters and the more serious of the two. Her hair was a deep, rich brown, dark enough that when the sun shone on it through the window, Rachael swore she saw strands of red interwoven in the waves. Winnie’s dark brown eyes were large, and angled at the edges, giving her an exotic look that Rachael found intriguing. There was an intelligent look in Winnie’s eyes that Rachael admired.
Rachael had only met Ben’s half-brother Gideon, Viscount Sheffield, once. That had been at her wedding, but she thought Winnie and Lord Sheffield resembled their father, the Duke of Townsend, whereas Ben and his youngest sister must resemble their mother. Although Rachael had never seen even a portrait of the duchess.
Rachael thought that was strange, but she looked at Ben’s youngest sister and imagined what Ben’s mother must look like.
Anne was the youngest and was as different from her older sister as night from day. Where Winnie was dark with an exotic look, Anne was blond with deep blue eyes, the same shade as Ben’s. Where Winnie was thoughtful and reserved, Anne seemed more carefree and adventurous. Where Winnie was hesitant and seemed to hide her emotions behind a protective wall of aloofness, Anne wore her thoughts and her heart on her sleeve. She had a carefree nature that invited friendship and acquaintances—and adventure. Rachael could tell already that Anne would lead any suitor who caught her eye on a merry chase.
Rachael filed these differences away for future reference. Ben had mentioned that his father had considered them too young for a Season this year. But they would both have their come-out next year. Rachael found it intriguing to imagine what sort of husbands they would choose.
Although she wouldn’t suggest that His Grace choose husbands for his daughters as he’d done for Ben, she hoped they’d be as fortunate as she’d been.
“Are you going to introduce us to the babe soon, Ben?” Winnie asked her brother. “Although we’ve enjoyed getting better acquainted with Rachael, Father tells us you surprised him with a granddaughter.”
Hearing Claire referred to as the Duke of Townsend’s granddaughter caused a lump to form in Rachael’s throat. She turned her gaze to Ben and found him smiling at her.
“Yes, I suppose we did surprise him. Why don’t you send for Claire, Rachael?”
“I’ll get her. I won’t be but a moment.”
Rachael went to the room they’d set up as a nursery and got Claire, then brought her back down. She entered the room and sat on the sofa beside Ben with Claire on her lap. “Lady Winnifred. Lady Anne. I’d like you to meet Claire.” Rachael took Claire’s hand and shook it to get Claire’s attention. “Claire, I want you to meet two very special ladies. They are your aunts and you are always to be on your best behavior around them.”
Claire answered by blowing a mass of messy bubbles, then talking gibberish as she bounced on Rachael’s lap.
“Oh,” Ben’s sisters both exclaimed, clasping their hands together in front of them. “She’s beautiful! Simply adorable.”
Claire thought Winnie and Anne’s gestures were a game, and she matched their movements. She clapped her hands excitedly in front of her as Winnie and Anne had done.
For the next half hour or more Claire was spoiled terribly by Ben’s sisters. But eventually, the babe became restless and started to fuss. Rachael stood. “I think Claire’s had enough socializing for one day. It’s time for her nap.”
Ben stopped her progress. “Rachael, perhaps Winnie would like to accompany you. I’d like to show Anne the gardens. I’m sure she’d like to see them.”
Rachael was ready to suggest that Ben show both his sisters the gardens, but the look that passed between Ben and Winnie indicated that there was something Ben wanted to discuss with his youngest sister in private. And Winnie was an accomplice in providing her brother the opportunity to be alone with Anne.
“I’d love to help you put Claire down,” Winnie said. “That will give me a chance to see our old nurse, Mrs. Coffee.”
“Of course,” Rachael said, carrying a fussing Claire to the door. “We won’t be long.”
“Take your time,” Ben answered, and Winnie nodded in response.
Rachael couldn’t help but think that something wasn’t right, and whatever it was involved Anne. She filed her suspicions away to ask Ben later. She considered asking Winnie, but from her reaction to Ben’s comment, Rachael thought this was something her husband needed to explain to her.
The second Lady Winnifred saw Mrs. Coffee, she ran into the arms of her childhood nurse and hugged her the same as she might have done when she was a girl of four, instead of a young lady of nineteen. The emotional scene caused Rachael to realize how alone Winnie and Anne were. With their mother gone, and the person who’d no doubt been their substitute mother since their mother left now taking care of Claire, they had no one. Rachael’s heart ached for the two girls.
She gave Winnie and Mrs. Coffee time to visit, then the nurse touched Winnie’s cheek in a tender caress before she turned to carry Claire off for her nap.
Remembering Ben’s words to take their time, Rachael led Winnie to the sitting room connected to Claire’s room. “Would you like to sit and visit for a while?” Rachael asked.
“Yes, I’d like that,” Winnie answered.
Rachael and Winnie sat in chairs angled before the fire, and Winnie started the conversation as if she wanted and needed to talk.
“She’s a beautiful little girl,” Winnie said when they were seated.
“Yes,” Rachael answered. “And she has a sweet disposition, except when she’s tired or hungry. Then she becomes quite demanding.”
“That sounds like my brother. Ben’s the same way.” Winnie hesitated, then spoke again. “I know I shouldn’t ask this, and Father tells me I’m not always wise in keeping my thoughts to myself, but…”
“Yes?” Rachael encouraged.
“Are you going to tell her when she’s older?”
Winnie’s question caught Rachael by surprise. Then she thought back to the conversation she and Ben had had that morning. Rachael nodded. “Yes. She’ll need to know. And it will be better if she hears the details surrounding her birth from us than someone else.”
Winnie nodded as if that answer met with her approval.
“People are not always kind,” Rachael said. She knew how true her words were. She’d lived through a scandal. “It’s important we’re always here for Claire, and that she knows we love her. She needs to always know that she’s wanted, and that she’s no different than any other children Ben and I might have.”
Winnie turned in her chair to be able to look directly at Rachael. “Claire will always be special to us, too. You’ll never have to worry about her not having family around to make her feel loved.”
“Thank you, Winnie.” Rachael reached over and placed her hand atop Winnie’s.
“She looks like Ben. Is he Claire’s father?”
Rachael swallowed hard. “Yes, he’s Claire’s father.”
“Papa said he knew she was Ben’s the minute he laid eyes on her. She has his coloring.”
“Yes, she does.”
Winnie smiled. “Do you mind if we come to visit her again soon?”
“Of course not. You’re welcome any time you want. And not just to visit Claire. I’d love to have you call on me, too. And Mrs. Coffee.”
Winnie smiled. “Thank you.”
“Not at all. I imagine you miss your mother. It must be difficult without her.”
The expression on Winnie’s face changed. In the beat of her heart, Winnie’s face paled and the focus of her eyes turned distant.
“What is it, Winnie? Is something wrong?”
Winnie took in a trembling breath that lifted her shoulder, then released it on a shudder. Her eyes narrowed with a bitterness Rachael couldn’t believe Winnie could feel.
“He hasn’t told you, has he?” Winnie said, more as an accusation than a question.
“Told me what?”
Ben’s sister simply shook her head as if the fact that Ben had kept something from her was a joke on Rachael. As if the connection between Ben and herself wasn’t as solid as Rachael mistakenly believed if her husband hadn’t trusted her with a secret he and Winnie knew. A secret that involved Ben’s mother.
“What is it your brother hasn’t told me?”
Winnie shook her head. “That’s something you’ll have to ask Ben. If he’ll tell you.”
“Why wouldn’t he tell me?”
“Why didn’t you tell Ben about Claire?”
“That was different. I didn’t tell anyone.”
“Because you knew there’d be a scandal if they found out,” Winnie said accusingly. “And because even the people who loved you most couldn’t accept her. Let alone the people in Society who spend their time looking for the next scandal.”
Rachael couldn’t deny what Winnie said. But surely Ben could have trusted her enough to tell her something that affected his family?
A score of questions raced through Rachael’s mind. Ben hadn’t allowed her to keep him in the dark concerning anything that involved her. The fact that he had insisted on knowing every detail of what had happened at Julia Bentley’s party, yet had intentionally kept something from her, bothered her more than she thought it would. The fact that he wouldn’t abide her keeping secrets from him, yet he intended to keep secrets from her made her angry.
“Does Anne know about this? Is that why your brother needed to talk to her alone?”
Winnie shook her head. “No, she doesn’t know. But she should. Then maybe she wouldn’t be causing such trouble.”
“What do you mean?”
Winnie closed her mouth. The expression on her face before she turned away from Rachael told her that Winnie realized she’d said too much.
“We should probably go back down,” Winnie said, then rose from her chair. She didn’t wait to see if Rachael agreed, but walked across the room to the door.
Rachael caught up with her before she left the room. “Winnie,” she said, placing her hand on Winnie’s arm. “If you ever need to talk, I want you to feel free to come to me. I can be a good listener if you ever need one.”
Winnie smiled, but the smile was sad. “Ben’s lucky to have you,” she said.
“Thank you,” Rachael answered. “Someday you’ll find someone special, too.”
“No,” she answered with a firm denial. “Marriage isn’t an option for me. And it’s not an option for Anne, either. Except she doesn’t know it yet.”
Rachael stared at Winnie’s retreating back in shock. And her anger toward Ben increased. Whatever secret he was keeping involved their mother. And it was tragic.
And it affected his sisters more than anyone thought.
. . .
Ben walked through the garden with Anne’s hand on his arm. She was the one who looked and acted most like him, from her golden brown hair, to her midnight blue eyes, to her carefree zest for life that was once the same as his—until he discovered what his mother had done.
His heart ached because he knew the light would go out of Annie’s eyes, too, when she found out that their mother was a murderer.
“You’re happy, aren’t you, Ben?” she said as they walked down a cobbled path. “I can tell from the way you look. And the way you act. I think you’re in love.”
Ben dropped his head back on his shoulders and laughed. Leave it to Annie to say exactly what she thought.
“You can tell all that just from one visit?”
“Of course. Anyone can see that you and Rachael are meant for each other.” She stopped on the cobbled path and looked up at him. “Someday I’m going to marry someone just as perfect.”
Ben gave her fingers on his arm a gentle squeeze, then continued on their walk. “Yes, you are, Annie. And you’ll live happily ever after.”
The two walked a little farther into the garden, then Ben brought up the reason he’d come out here with her. “Annie, has Mother written you?”
Her hesitation told him all he needed to know. “Anne, I know you don’t understand what happened, but there’s a very good reason why it’s important that you don’t conta
ct her.”
“I know she and Papa had a terrible argument, but Mother says if Papa will just let her—”
Ben stopped on the path and turned Anne so she faced him. “There’s nothing Mother can say that will change anything, Anne. What Mother did can’t be explained away.”
“But if Papa will just—”
“No, Annie. Father will never forgive her for what she did.”
Anne’s eyes glistened with tears. “It can’t have been that bad, Ben. Mother says it wasn’t.”
“It was, Annie. It was something Father can never forgive mother for doing.”
“You can’t mean that,” she said with a hitch in her voice.
The expression on his sister’s face pulled at his heart. “I know you don’t think it’s fair, but someday you’ll understand.”
“She just wants a chance to explain,” she repeated. “She said that if Papa will just listen to her, she can make everything all right.”
Obviously those were the words their mother had used in her letters. “No, Annie. That will never happen.”
“That’s not fair, Ben. Mother said it was all a misunderstanding. She just wants to—”
“No, Annie. You’re not to contact her. You’re not to encourage her. And you’re not to send her any of your pin money.”
“But she doesn’t have any money, Ben. She said she’s—”
“She has food, and shelter, and clothing. That’s all she needs. That’s more than she deserves.”
Anne gasped. “You’re not being fair, Ben. She’s our mother. We can’t treat her like this.”
“Yes, we can. And it’s what is best for Mother, too. She can’t come back. Not after what she did.”
“No,” Anne cried out. “You can’t mean that.”
“Yes, Anne. I do. I know how difficult this is for you. I regret the way things are as much as you do. But things will never be like they were before. What she did is monstrous, completely and utterly unforgivable.”
Anne stopped in the middle of the path and clutched his arms. Her grasp was hard, filled with desperation. “What did she do? Tell me. Papa wants me to believe that he sent her away because she’s ill, but that’s not true. Mother says she’s not sick.”