Endgame (Book 2): Alekhine's Gun

by W. A. R.

  Just another reminder of the change within her.

  They had found a barn of some type in the large back yard, a frail fence covering it and a good section of land around it. There was nothing but a few tools and a few bales of hay inside of it and the skeletal remains of what could have been a horse between the backside of the barn and the stone fence. There was also what was once a garden on the opposite side of the property as well. Amber had stood there, her eyes drifting from the house to the barn and back to the garden. This place was large and accommodating. It would have been a perfect place to live had things not happened the way that they did. Now, however, they would not be able to enjoy what this place had to offer; not all of them, anyways. Some would be gone before long, searching and fighting to rescue the others on a long shot. Truth was, Amber wasn’t sure she could survive without them. She could survive but she wasn’t sure her heart would allow her too. Those three and her children are what always made life worth living. As it was, only Cassie remained, and she was grown and distant. Amber damn near had nothing.

  After their summary of the property, they had all began unloading their items that were in the truck, taking them into the house. This was all done in silence, under the cover of stars and a cloudless sky. It was beautiful, she thought. It was the kind of night where lovers lay under the stars or kids studied the planets and constellations. She knew that the kids would be doing no such thing and with the others gone, there were no more lovers in their group…no one to appreciate what beauty there was to offer. These thoughts continued to haunt her as everyone ambled into the house. Amber, Buddy, and George however, had other chores to handle before they could move forward with whatever was needed next.

  They had rounded the front of the red Dodge, their footsteps determined and steady. Still the silence reigned on and instead of making Amber uneasy, it was comforting to her. Damien had remained oddly silent and resigned as well during all of this, that is, until George lowered the tailgate and reached for him. Despite his best efforts to escape while whimpering desperately for some form of saving grace, he couldn’t move, and the fact brought an immense satisfaction to them. Amber didn’t remember how they had gotten him to the barn, but she did remember strapping him as he screamed to a chair. She remembered standing there, staring at him as he lowered his chin to his chest, his head hanging limply atop his shoulders; she remembered balling her hands into fists at her sides as Buddy and George moved past her, her mind and body wanting nothing more than to torture him, to make him every bit of the monster that he was.

  As she stood there, her mind was slow in thinking. Here was this man, this monster who had pulled her family apart and killed her son and in the process destroyed her heart and her conscious. Lance had said that she had a fire within her that they wanted to witness and Amber was sure he wouldn’t want to witness what this fire was capable of. She stood, staring, contemplating every little thing that she wanted to do to him later, determining what tools she needed and she found herself wishing she had some adrenaline to keep him from going into the shock she knew he was going to delve into. It was going to be horrible, traumatic, and she wasn’t even sure if she was going to believe what he had to tell her. All she had known of the man for the past three months was nothing but a large lie entwined with malicious hate. Finally, she moved to followed George and Buddy who stood waiting for her at the doors of that dreadful barn. They had closed the doors, locking them and keeping him in the pitch-black darkness with nothing but the sounds of Biters keeping him company. Then, the final task waited before them. They needed to bury the children.

  After Buddy and George had taken the corpses of two young ones to the intended spot, Amber stopped them from going to retrieve spades to dig with. If she were honest, she wanted to be alone with him, with her son, before they buried him; before she buried him. Her eyes had been pleading and slowly filling with tears. She needed this, needed them to try to understand that this was going to be the last she had with her son, or the body of him. It didn’t matter; she knew he was dead but still, holding her baby close to her one last time was something she needed. How could she have let him die? A lot of guilt rested on her soul, a lot of guilt and anger and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She needed some time to come to terms with that fact that once her son was placed in that hole she would no longer see him; his face would be nothing but a memory after that.

  They obliged hesitantly, reluctant to leave, and once the two men had disappeared she fell to her knees beside her son and she wailed. She cried, and she screamed. She wrapped her arms tight around her waist and doubled over, burying her face into the cold cloth that covered him. The night air brought a chill and she shivered but she refused to move, refused to leave her son’s side. This was the last time she would have with him, the last chance she would have to tell him everything she wanted to tell him, to tell him what kind of man he was supposed to grow to be. It was the last chance she had to tell him how very proud of him she was and how very dearly she loved him. He had been a lesson to her, she had told his non-listening ears, a lesson of love and how great things came from horrific circumstances. She told him the truth of his conception, and she told him how very frightened she was of the truth. She told him how shamed she was. She had told him all of this while intermittently crying and screaming, holding tight to herself so she wouldn’t fall completely apart. His ears would never hear her confessions. And she stayed this way until morning. Sure, the others had kept coming out to check on her throughout the cool night, to do what needed to be done, but she forced them to wait. She needed to wait, just a bit longer.

  And now, she sat beside the hole that was dug for her son by two wonderful people, and she watched as a hole was dug for Brittany, and a cross secured for Elva-Jo. Her eyelids were heavy and her fingers numb from the crisp morning air but she didn’t mind. Her son was colder. She knew that her mother and her daughter watched her, nay, had heard her the previous night and yet again, she didn’t care. She was hurting, and there was no way to fix it. She felt a bitterness seep into her bones, an anger that was menacing and unmatched and she knew that once he was put into the ground that a large piece of herself would go with him. Coming to accept that, she knew that it was time and slowly she rose to her feet, rounding the feet of her son, and lowering herself into the hole where he would be buried. Zeus, who had lain sadly beside her, beside the hole, lifted his snout from his paws and watched her. She heard the others stop what they were doing and she knew they were watching her as well as she lifted her arms and pulled her son to her. He fell into her arms, and she held him as she had all those times before when she had carried his sleeping form to bed. And just as she had whenever he was asleep, before hell came to them on earth, she lowered him to his final bed, his final resting place.

  “Goodnight.” She whispered softly to his unhearing ears, pulling her hands from under him. She stared at him in the darkness of the hole, the cool fall wind blowing against her and she smiled slightly, feeling her heart grieve in his loss and yet rejoice in the fact that she had been so very blessed to have been his mother.

  She turned to climb out and saw George standing there, hand out and ready to help her, a sad smile on his face. She easily reached up and placed the toe of her shoe against the side of the hole, climbing out. Once she was sturdy on her feet, she saw Cassie holding one spade, and Rick holding the other and she nodded, knowing that her daughter needed to do this, to accept it and mourn in her own way. Cassie nodded back at her mother in acknowledgement, her hazel eyes filling with tears as Amber studied her. She wanted nothing more than to go hold her daughter, but Cassie needed her time; she understood that, didn’t she? Still, it was a sheer force of will that made her legs move her from her son’s grave towards George, who was slowly leading her by the hand from the grave, allowing the Cassie and Rick to cover him.

  The bitterness that resided in Amber’s heart was growing with every passing minute, and she wished she could rid herself of it,
and yet not. She allowed it to embrace her and she inhaled deeply, feeling George’s reassuring hand squeeze her own as they neared the house. She didn’t want to go in and she didn’t want to sleep. Yes, her body was exhausted and so very tired, but she couldn’t. How could she whenever the others were out there, somewhere? And then she remembered…and it hit her with such a painful force that she couldn’t believe that she had forgotten. They were meeting the others on Stateline Road the following day at noon. More fighting, more battles, and more death; it was all possible, she knew. Then again, hadn’t those people been right about everything that had happened back at the house in Thurston? Hadn’t their advice and words of warning actually been accurate? The answer was yes, and Amber and her family had killed all their people in the process of surviving. She wondered if these ‘friendly’ strangers would be happy about that. They obviously worked with the enemy, considering the fact that they were watching them and had Miles’s radio. So, the next question was, why would they help Amber’s family killed their friends? It didn’t make sense. They needed a plan, they needed to discuss everything that was going to happen or possibly could happen, and she couldn’t do that while she was sleeping. Everyone needed her. Everyone that was at the new house, the others who were with the enemy, and even the ones that were in the ground. They all needed redemption, didn’t they? The pain was too much to bear. The voices of Katie, Bobby-Jean, and Buddy reached her ears through the haze of foggy thoughts. She wondered briefly if Buddy and George had mentioned their conversation with the men on the radio to the others; hell, if he had even had a chance to.

  Buddy looked at her pointedly. “Amber.” He nodded at her in greeting, and Amber nodded back before sighing. Her eyes felt so incredibly heavy, and her shoulders sagged with the weight of the world. She was running on fumes, not having slept in over twenty-four hours. Her head was still tender from her confrontation with Lance and she winced as it offered her a dull throb, reminding her it was still there. Yet, what needed to be done, needed to be done. Hell, she wasn’t even sure what to say to take away even a fraction of the sadness that gripped at them all. Things were tense and painful and they couldn’t fix it.

  “Buddy.” She replied, her voice hoarse. She felt feverish and like she was on the verge of vomiting.

  “How are you feeling?” he asked and she winced. She wasn’t going to answer that question; she couldn’t.

  “Everyone alright?” she asked, effectively changing the subject. Catching the slight nods from everyone, even as they looked away from her, she knew that they were trying to ignore the shooting pain that they all felt.

  “Yeah, we will be alright.” Buddy offered before stealing a glance at her. She frowned under his scrutiny. “Are you alright?”

  Was she alright? Absolutely not. Her mind was foggy at best from the blow to her head and the lack of sleep. Her throat hurt and her voice nearly gone, her jaw sore from screaming and crying deep into the night. Her eyes felt like sandpaper every time she blinked as they were dry, puffy, void of tears. She had lost five of the most important people in the world to her within two days, making her heart desperately want to stop beating. Physically, she was barely held together; emotionally, she had already fallen apart and was unsure of how to put the pieces back together. So, no, she wasn’t alright. She couldn’t tell him that, though; not in front of her mother, or any of the others for that matter. They were all depending on her to make the decisions, waiting to follow whichever way she thought best to lead.

  She hated that.

  “Did anyone get any sleep last night?” she asked off-handedly, clearly taking another route to avoid his questioning. He stared hard at her for a moment as she avoided his eye contact. She didn’t feel like being analyzed and most certainly not by him.

  There were a few shrugs in response to her question before Bobby-Jean turned her concerned eyes to her daughter. “We got enough.”

  Amber nodded, offering a brief smile that didn’t meet her eyes. “Good.”

  “We can handle anything…” Bobby-Jean began but Amber cut her off.

  “Mom…” she warned.

  Her mother continued. “…that happens. If it gets bad, we will…”

  “Mom, please…” her irritation was growing.

  Bobby-Jean kept talking over Amber’s protests. “…wake you. You need your rest. Please go get some sleep.”

  Amber stared hard at her mother, feeling her heart ache because she knew she wasn’t the only one hurting with loss. “Mother, I’m fine. There are more important things going on right now.”

  “You can’t do anything if you die from exhaustion.” Buddy commented. He then glanced at Katie and lifted a brow. “That’s a thing, right?”

  Katie sighed and shrugged. “Yeah…it can be.”

  “Guys…” Amber began protesting.

  “I knew it!” Buddy exclaimed before turning back to Amber. “See? You need your rest.”

  “I’m doing the best I can. I will sleep when I feel comfortable with our safety and our position to do so. Can we please leave it at that?” She looked at them all, her throat constricting. She cleared her throat loudly, chasing away at least some of the hoarseness of it. She placed her hands firmly on her hips. “Please? I don’t need any lectures right now.”

  “Fine.” Buddy grumbled before stealing a glance at George, who just happened to be standing beside her. “Tell us what you need us to do.”

  “We need to talk as soon as possible. All of us about everything that has happened. We haven’t even had a chance to do that yet.” Amber replied as easily as she could, hoping not to startle anyone with her words and yet jumping right into business, her tears still fresh on her face. No one disagreed with her, however; instead they all nodded their agreement. She ran her hand across her face in exasperation.

  “About what happened?” George began cautiously. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”

  “Yeah.” Buddy agreed. “That won’t do anything but bring more pain.”

  Amber narrowed her eyes at the two men. “What are you two saying?”

  “Just that…we know what happened. We were there.” George offered her. And he was right, at least for the most part. However…

  “There is still some stuff that needs to be gone over that not everyone is aware of.” She told them and judging by the looks on their faces, they had had the sudden realization of what she had meant.

  Bobby-Jean and Katie stole curious glances at her. “What do you mean?”

  Amber sighed and opened her mouth to answer when Buddy hurriedly cut her off. “Alright…I get what you’re saying.” He stated. Amber closed her mouth and looked at him. He didn’t want to tell them about the men on the radio, at least not yet. She could see that much on his face. But why? She couldn’t very well ask him right then and there. She decided she would address it later when they were away from the others.

  Amber shifted on her feet, not looking to anyone in particular. “We need to discuss what is going to happen next.” She needed to understand where everyone stood because though she may be willing to risk her own life to save Shelly, Miles, and Brian, she wasn’t going to risk the others unless they were willing to do the same.

  Bobby-Jean gaped like a fish. “What do you mean ‘next’?”

  Amber shrugged. “I mean our next move. We have to do something…”

  “No.”

  Amber groaned in frustration. “Mother…”

  “I lost Brian and your father because of these people, because of this mess.”

  Amber swallowed. “I know, mom. I lost them too. That’s why we have to do something about it.”

  Bobby-Jean crossed her arms, tears brimming in her eyes. “I can’t…”

  Amber looked at her mom as if she had lost her mind. “Mom…”

  “I am not losing you and Cassie too!” her mother all but screamed at her suddenly, surprising everyone. Amber jumped back a little, startled; her eyes were wide in surprise. Only seconds before she
had been calm and rational and now she was pointing her finger at Amber, tears flowing from her eyes. She was hysterical and Amber couldn’t blame her. Still, Amber knew what needed to be done, and she would make her mother realize that she was right. “We don’t even know if they are alive!”

  It was like a slap to the face, her words. “Are you serious right now?”

  Bobby-Jean took a step closer to Amber, her eyes red and her hands trembling. “I am dead serious.”

  Buddy shook his head. “Bad choice of words.” He groaned. He held up his hands and took a step back whenever she turned her angry glare to him.

  Amber swallowed the large lump that settled in her throat. “That is your son!”

  “I know that. But going after them would lead to me losing a son and a daughter.” Her mother retorted. Amber looked at her evenly. This conversation was hurting her. She knew that it would; and yet still…there she was feeling the pain.

  “Are you really willing to take that risk of losing him? Because as long as there is even the slightest chance they are alive I am going after them.” Amber growled, feeling George’s hand on her shoulder. Yes, she had become angry. Very angry. She was thankful for George reigning her in and leading her back to reality. Katie looked nervously between mother and daughter while Buddy stepped forward, ready to intervene should it be necessary.

  “Are you crazy?!” Bobby-Jean exclaimed and Amber studied her mother for only a brief moment before answering with as much conviction as she had.