by Claire Adams
“I don’t know,” he said. “I mean, I probably should. Why?”
“Well, I’m going to go back to Bel Air tomorrow.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. I need to. I’ve got some things I need to deal with. So . . .” I paused.
He gave the tie another yank. “And you’re going to be afraid that you’re just going to miss me too much? Are you asking me to go with you?”
“No,” I said. “I’m just letting you know that—”
“I’d be more than happy to go with you to Maryland. It can be a little road trip.”
“Are you sure? Don’t you think you should stay here?”
“Uh, no. Well, maybe, but I don’t know if I can deal with wearing a tie for another day. How long are you planning to go back for?”
“Well, I mean, I do live there and everything. I’ve got this whole gym fiasco to take care of. I need to see my mom, too.”
“It’s been a long time since I last saw your mom. But yeah, I wouldn’t mind a little distraction. I kind of need to think about what it is I want to do with the company and everything.”
“I thought you’d already decided.”
“I know, I did, but today, Isla . . . I don’t know. It was a lot. I really had no idea what my dad did, how hard he worked, which I realize sounds pretty shitty. Luckily, I don’t need to make any decisions right now. So yeah, I wouldn’t mind going, keeping you company. Fuck! Can you please help me with this goddamn tie?”
I laughed and went over and helped him get the tie off. I pulled his shirt out of the waist of his pants. “There,” I said. “Now you look a little more relaxed.”
“I’m not going to be able to relax until I get out of this outfit,” he said. “Do people really wear this shit all the time?”
He went and changed and came back wearing a t-shirt that read Viva Ibiza! and a pair of plaid lounge pants.
“Much better,” he said. “I’m fuckin beat, though. I swear, I didn’t do much more than sit there at the desk and look through some folders and I’m exhausted.”
“It’s a different environment than you’re used to. It’ll take time to adjust.”
“Yeah.” He came over to me and I put my arms around him. “I’m having second thoughts now as to whether or not I actually want to adjust.”
The next morning, we were up and out of the city early. Instead of driving straight to Bel Air, though, we stopped on the way so I could buy a few things for my mother.
“She’s not really into presents,” I said, “but I don’t just want to show up there empty-handed.” We were in a department store, not as fancy as Saks, but it still had plenty of nice stuff.
“I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like presents,” Levi said. “Though parents seem to appreciate functional presents. Does she need anything?”
I pictured my mom’s little house; really, everything in it could be upgraded or replaced. Not that we were going to show up there with a new couch or refrigerator or something. I put a few throw pillows, and a nice duvet cover and a comforter, along with some bath towels and a case of new drinking glasses, in the shopping cart.
“See?” Levi said, as we were checking out. The cashier kept looking at him and then blushing every time he looked her direction. “You can totally handle this shopping thing.”
“This was different,” I said. “This is not a store where a tiny little wallet costs five thousand dollars.”
Levi put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me toward him. “Guess what,” he whispered into my ear, “you can afford it.”
The cashier was watching us, and I felt both a little uncomfortable and a little pleased. I recognized that look—she was envious of me. I’d certainly looked at other women like that, when I’d been younger and overweight, when I’d been at the gym and seen some woman with a totally strong, sleek body. I’d never thought that I would be the one who would be getting the looks. I knew Levi had a lot to do with it, though.
“It’s still going to take some time to get used to,” I said, ducking out from under his arm.
We went out to the car and I had to stuff all the bags into the trunk to get them to fit. “Am I even going to be able to close the trunk? This looks like a lot more stuff than it actually is.”
It did shut, though just barely. When we were back on the road, I decided to call Sophie and give her the head’s up.
“Hey,” I said when Sophie picked up. “It’s me.”
“Hey! I was just thinking about you. We must be operating on the same wave length or something. How’s it going?”
“Pretty good. Listen, we’re driving down there now, so I was hoping we could go out to eat at some point. I didn’t know what your schedule would be like, though, and I’m not sure how long we’re going to be in Bel Air for.”
“We?” she asked.
I glanced over at Levi. “Um, yeah. We.”
“Ew, you’re bringing him back here? Jesus, Isla. You’re really dedicated to Project Revenge! Good for you. Well, it’d be nice to get together with you without him, but if that’s not possible I suppose I can stand to be around him for an evening. Or lunch, or whatever. Just let me know.”
“Okay, I will,” I said.
After I got off the phone with Sophie, I called Mom.“Hi, Mom,” I said. “Are you home right now? Are you busy?”
“I’m here,” she said. “I’m just puttering around the house. Straightening things up. Why?”
“I was thinking of stopping by for a visit. I’ve got a surprise for you! A couple, actually.”
“Oh boy,” she said. “I’m not sure I like the sounds of this.”
“Stop it, Mom,” I said. “It’s nothing bad, I promise. I’m not coming by with a new puppy for you or anything.”
“You better not.”
“I won’t. But we’re in the car right now, actually—so if it’s a good time, we’ll be by in five minutes or so.”
“We?” she asked.
“That’s part of the surprise. Don’t worry, Mom, we’ll see you soon!”
“She sounds less than thrilled,” Levi said when I hung up. “I can’t remember the last time I saw your mother. How is Sharon?”
“She’s been good.”
“Are you sure it’s a good idea if we go over there? If I go over there?”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” I said. “There’s no reason she wouldn’t want to see you.”
“Other than my father ended up being too busy with his business to actually spend time with her?”
I glanced over at him. “We don’t need to bring that up. But I think part of her understands. It’s not like she didn’t know what he did before she married him. It was sort of a whirlwind, fairy-tale romance for her. Something she hadn’t been expecting, at all.”
“She always did seem like a very pragmatic person.”
“She still is. And I know for a fact she wasn’t planning on falling in love with anyone, but that’s what happened, and she allowed herself to give in to that. She and my father were never in love. She doesn’t talk about it, but I know it.”
“Yeah?” Levi said. “I don’t think I ever asked you about your dad.”
“You didn’t. I don’t really know him; he’s out there somewhere, but he never wanted to have anything to do with a family.”
My mother had never talked about it, but I knew she hated being a single mother. I knew she wished that my father hadn’t just left the way he had, but there was nothing she could do about it.
“I always liked your mom,” Levi said. “She was cool. Think she’d like to go out to lunch or something? Where is there good to eat around here? I’m starving.”
“There’s some places downtown,” I said. “She’ll probably just say she’d rather eat whatever it was she had in the refrigerator, though.”
When we got to Mom’s, I parked in the driveway and Levi helped me get all the stuff out of the trunk. We were walking up the faded brick walkway when Mom came to the door, a
surprised look on her face.
“Isla!” she said, as though she hadn’t been expecting to see me.
“Hi, Mom.”
She squinted. “Levi?”
He was bear hugging the bags with the pillows and the comforter in them. “Hey, Sharon,” he said. “Long time no see.”
“You can say that again.” Mom stepped back, holding the door open. “Come on in, the two of you. What, are you moving in? What is all this stuff?”
“Just some presents for you,” I said. “I thought I’d bring you by some things you needed.” We went into the living room and put the bags down.
She peered into one of the bags. “A bed spread?”
“It’s a duvet cover. It’s really pretty, don’t you think? You’ve had the same comforter on your bed for years now; I thought you might like this one. There’s a new down comforter in this bag, here, and you just put the cover over it.”
My mother looked less than thrilled. “I don’t recall telling you that I needed my bedroom redecorated. Not that I want to sound ungrateful, but this is a lot of stuff.” She looked at Levi. “I was sorry to hear about Alex, Levi. I hope you’re doing all right.”
He nodded. “Yeah. It was definitely a surprise. But I’m doing okay. Do you mind if I use the bathroom? I had one too many coffees on the way down.”
“Sure,” Mom said. She pointed to her left. “Just go down that hallway and it’s the first door on the right.”
“Great, thanks,” he said.
“What on earth do you think you’re doing?” Mom asked once he was out of earshot. “Why are you here with Levi?”
“I thought you might want to see him,” I said.
“Why?”
“I don’t, Mom, you were married to his father for a while! We did all live together.”
“I’m aware of that, Isla, I don’t need you to recap my personal history for me. But he used to make you miserable. I’m just surprised to see you with him, is all. I don’t want you to get hurt again. I think you should be able to understand that.”
“I’m not going to get hurt, Mom,” I said.
“You know, I thought that, too,” she said. “With Alex. The way everything happened, it just seemed like it was too good to be true, but I wanted to believe that even someone like me could have a happy ending. We all saw how well that worked out, didn’t it?”
“But you’re happy, aren’t you?”
She shrugged. “I’m not unhappy, Isla. But has life worked out how I thought it would? Not in the least. If anything, my marriage to Alex showed me that money most certainly cannot buy you happiness, despite what everyone around the world seems to think. And now you’re someone who has more money than you’ll ever need, more money that you even know what to do with. I don’t want to see that change you. People who have come into much smaller sums of money than you, have allowed that to change them, and not for the better.” She let her gaze go to the shopping bags that had been moved from the dining room table onto the floor. “Money changes people. Money changes your relationship with people. People see you differently when they know you’re very well off.”
I reached over and squeezed her hand. “I’m not going to let it change me,” I said. “And I know who my friends are.”
“But you already have changed,” she said. “You’re jetting all over the globe, you’re not going to re-open your business, you’re hanging out with Levi. That’s all this is, right? Just the two of you hanging out?”
Her tone indicated that she did not approve of any of these things. Yet I couldn’t tell her that my whole reason for hanging out with Levi was to get back at him; she’d think that was completely immature, which, in a way, it was.
“Yeah,” I said. “I mean . . . it’s . . . we’re just, you know . . . friends. Things have changed since we were teenagers.”
“What about Ella?” Mom asked.
“Ella?” I repeated. Why was she asking about Ella? It was kind of weird that she’d even remember her after all these years; then again, Ella was so beautiful it’s not like she was an easy person to forget about. “What do you mean? I just saw Ella, actually, when I was in New York.”
“Okay,” Mom said. “Aren’t she and Levi . . .?”
I heard the bathroom door open. “No,” I said in a low voice. “She and Levi aren’t together.”
Levi came back then, and I could tell from the look on his face that he’d heard at least part of our conversation. I hoped he wasn’t going to bring any of it up right now.
“So,” he said, “can I offer to take you ladies out to lunch?”
Mom looked at me. “You know,” she said, “I think I might’ve preferred that puppy.”
*****
It felt a little strange bringing Levi to my house, which was modest and nice, but not that impressive. I felt a fleeting moment of fear that he was going to judge me over it, but I pushed that aside. The looks I caught him giving me at Mom’s made me think that he had one thing on his mind, and if I was to be honest, I felt the same way: I just wanted to get back to my place, close the door, and have sex.
I led him down to the bedroom and we both disrobed as quickly as we could. We fell back onto the bed and he ran his hands up and down my thighs before finding my pussy and sliding a finger inside.
“You’re so wet,” he said.
“I can’t help it. I just keep thinking about feeling you inside of me. That’s all that I want.”
“Happy to oblige,” he said. I spread my legs apart as he climbed on top of me, positioning his hips so he could slide himself in.
If I had known sex had felt this good, I would’ve started doing it a whole lot sooner.
*****
I got up early and went for a run, while Levi slumbered on, in my bed. Before I left, I stood there in the doorway and looked at him, the way his eyelashes were thick against his skin, the relaxed expression on his face. Never in a million years did I think that any of this would be happening.
I went outside and stretched as the early morning sun started to rise. I liked getting up early, especially in the summer, because it was before the heat of the day started, when everything was still relatively quiet. Once I was done stretching, I started to walk briskly for a few minutes, and then eased myself into a jog.
As my heart rate accelerated and my breathing quickened, the thoughts that were flitting through my mind began to drain away. That was the thing about exercise, but running especially—it didn’t matter what else was happening in your life, once you started to do it, it required your full attention. And soon it was just me and the road, the sound of the soles of my shoes hitting the ground, my breathing steady, my legs moving under me as though they were controlled by some outside force.
When I felt like that, it was as if I could run forever. It didn’t even feel like separate footfalls; it felt more like flying.
Eventually, though, fatigue would seep in, reminding me that I couldn’t actually go on forever. I liked to walk the last ten or fifteen minutes, to give myself chance to cool down and to enjoy the lingering stillness in my mind. My muscles felt sore, but in a productive way, like I could feel them getting stronger. I lifted my arms up over my head and stretched as I walked, turning to the right, then to the left.
I was about to turn off the main road and down one of the side street back toward my house when I heard someone call my name. I turned. It was Brian, who had been driving by but stopped and pulled over when he saw me. He got out of his car and jogged over.
“Isla!” he said. “I thought that was you.”
He looked as though he were either coming from or going to work. I hadn’t seen him since that night I’d walked in on him with Shannon.
“How have you been?”
“Fine,” I said coolly. “Things have been fine. How is everything with you and Shannon?”
“Me and Shannon? There’s nothing going on between me and Shannon. That night . . . that night was just sort of . . . a fluke, I guess.”
“I don’t think she’d care,” he said, and I had to admit that he was probably right. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot.”
I tried not to roll my eyes. “Please, Brian. We both know that’s bullshit.”
“It’s not though!” he said. “I ran into Sophie the other day.”
“Really? And she didn’t tell you to fuck off? That’s surprising.” The way he blanched when I said it made me think that she probably had done exactly that.
“She mentioned that you had been in New York, because you’d inherited some money.”
“Oh,” I said. I crossed my arms across my chest. “I get it. You heard that I’d inherited some money and now you want to be back in the picture. Well, guess what? That’s not going to happen.”
“No,” he said. “That’s not it at all. I’m just glad because I know it’s going to take a decent chunk of change to get the gym up and running again.”
“Who says I’m going to use any of my money for that?”
“Aren’t you?”
“I haven’t decided.”
“But you love that gym, Isla. That’s your place.”
“Why do you care what I do? Why does it matter to you whether I re-open the gym or go live out the rest of my days on some tropical island?”
His eyes widened. “You inherited enough money to do that?”
“It’s really none of your business.” I started to walk, hoping he wouldn’t follow me, but he did. “You’re just leaving your car there,” I said, glancing over my shoulder.
“It’s because you’re walking away from me. Isla, I don’t care about your money, okay? I mean that. But I do care about you. And what happened with Shannon was a big mistake. It was a complete error in judgment on my part, and I shouldn’t have let it happen. I realize that now. And I don’t take you being a virgin lightly, you know. It’s a big deal that you’d want me to be the one to—”
“I’m not a virgin,” I said.
“You’re not?”
“No.”
“Oh.” This seemed to take the wind out of his sails, which pleased me. But still, he kept in stride next. I turned down my road, my house visible. “Well, that doesn’t really surprise me. You’re beautiful, Isla. You know that I’ve always felt that about you.”
