Label Me Proud

by Stephie Walls

  “There was a time where one of us never did anything without the others. I bet you guys don’t remember that, but I do.”

  “How could we not remember it? We’ve been friends for most of our lives,” I pointed out.

  He spun the chair around with his foot, like he was on a merry-go-round. If he weren’t careful, he’d be sick as a dog, and I wasn’t cleaning up his puke. “Yeah, but it all changed after high school.”

  He was right. Everything changed because we grew up, and our lives went in different directions. Masyn and I had just had to mature faster. Neither of us had the luxury of spending the next four years living off our parents and getting a degree—not that we wanted it, anyhow.

  “Beau, just because you took a different path doesn’t mean we aren’t still as close as we were four years ago. You and Masyn still talk all the time.”

  “Yeah, about you,” he pouted, and I started to believe he’d had more to drink than I initially thought.

  I didn’t allow myself to see Masyn’s reaction. It wasn’t a secret they’d talked, I just wasn’t sure she wanted him tossing out all she’d said over the years. “We talked about you, too,” I confessed.

  Beau tilted his beer to the side and pushed off the floor, causing himself to turn faster in the seat. He was acting like a child, but for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out where the attitude changes or sudden regression into immaturity came from.

  I gave myself a mental shrug. It wasn’t my house. Far be it from me to tell him what to do, so I ignored his careless behavior. Beau spoke, even as the chair continued to whirl. “I just wish I could go back and change things…”

  “Why?” Masyn looked around when her voice echoed in the room around us.

  “Because I hate this”—he spread his arms out, still moving—“this place. I don’t want to live here.”

  I wasn’t sure if I could reason with him, but I gave it a shot. “You can sell the house, man.”

  “Not just the house. It’s the city, the people, the stuffy job with suits and ties. The expectation to live up to the Chastain name.”

  That I couldn’t help him with. I may not have all the things Beau did; nevertheless, I loved my life. After this weekend, I recognized the need to make some improvements where my dad was concerned, but all in all, I was happy.

  “If you’re so unhappy, change it.” Masyn always kept things simple.

  “And do what? Move back to Harden? Live with my parents? Get a job at the shop? Come on. Get real. There’s no life for me there.”

  Talking shit about the way we grew up and what we’d turned into was the fastest way to light a fuse under Masyn and piss her off. “Not like what you have here, you’re right. If you hate this so much, do something about it other than whine. So you’ve had a few crap days. You didn’t really lose anything by getting rid of Felicity. And a house is nothing more than a stack of boards neatly arranged. Maybe you should stop wallowing in self-pity and recognize the opportunities you had that most of your friends didn’t.”

  He finally put his foot on the floor and stopped spinning. “I don’t know how to undo the last four years’ worth of decisions.”

  I wasn’t going to sugarcoat shit for Beau. “You might want to start by deciding what you actually want, instead of taking what’s handed to you.” If this was the conversation he wanted to have tonight, by God, we could have it. Truthfully.

  He immediately got defensive. “What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Exactly what I said. You’re twenty-two, almost twenty-three years old, and you’ve never had a job. Not even a paper route. You were about to marry a woman you didn’t love for a fucking trust fund to continue living a cushy life. And fuck, look around. No one starts off in a house like this. You’ve set yourself up to fail, Beau. You’ve always had the best of everything, so you don’t appreciate anything.”

  “So, now I’m unhappy because I’m rich?” He snubbed the notion that my opinion might hold water.

  “Earth to Beau! You aren’t rich. Your parents are.”

  Masyn grabbed my forearm when I stood. “Lee, calm down. Don’t be so mean.”

  “No, I’m not going to calm down.” I turned my attention back to Beau. “You want to change your life, man? Then change your attitude. I love you, but at some point, you’ve got to cut the tie from Daddy’s purse strings. Whether that’s starting the job at this firm tomorrow, or that’s going back to Harden and working on an assembly line—do it because it makes you proud at the end of the day.”

  If looks could kill, I’d be on my way to the morgue. The vein on the side of Beau’s head thrummed a steady beat, and his eyes narrowed like he was ready to attack. “Another couple of weeks with you, and I’ll be halfway there.” He held up his beer. “A member of the blue-collar crowd.”

  “I’m not ashamed of who I am or where I came from, Beau. There was a time you weren’t, either.”

  Masyn jumped up from her seat and stood in front of me. She placed her hands on my chest, craned her neck, and pleaded with her eyes. “You guys, please stop. I don’t understand why you’re fighting.”

  I held up my hands. I didn’t have a clue how we got here tonight or what happened with Beau. All I knew for certain was that I wasn’t prepared to lose my best friend over whatever this was. “Beau, you’ve got to do what feels right. And it may not be what everyone else expects or wants for you. Just know, at the end of the day, however you decide to go, I’ll always have your back…even if I disagree with you.”

  He ran his hands through his hair and then stalked to the kitchen. The beer bottle clanked with the others in the trash can when he threw it away. “Lee, you know where everything is. Masyn, make yourself at home. I’m calling it a night.”

  When he was out of earshot, Masyn nudged me in the side. “Even I know that you know you have to go talk to him. You can’t leave things like this.”

  “And say what? I’m not going to coddle him.”

  She gently shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Don’t be such a guy.”

  “What would you have me be? Handling him with kid gloves is what got him here. All his life, someone’s shielded him from reality. Now that he’s about to face it, he’s freaking out. Maybe the best thing for him is to have to lie in the bed he made.”

  “Now you just sound like your dad. I swear, if you start talking about lying down with dogs, or leading a horse to water, or can’t never could, I think I’ll puke.”

  A smirk rose on my lips. “You ruined the entire speech I had planned for him.”

  “This isn’t funny.”

  “It’s a little funny. Come on, Masyn. I’m tired. I’m dealing with my own crap, and none of it came from not liking the taste of the silver spoon in my mouth.”

  “He’s your friend, Lee. He hasn’t left your side in two days, and I can tell by looking at this place, he had other things he needed to do. Stop being a jackass. There’s obviously a reason he’s lashing out, and it’s more than just the beer he consumed.”

  “Fine.” That didn’t mean I had to like it.

  She smiled, pleased with herself. She might not want to count her chickens before they’d hatched; I hadn’t ironed out his wrinkles just yet.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  After I showed Masyn where our room was and got her towels so she could shower, I traversed the mile across the house to Beau’s bedroom. The lights were on, so he was either still up and ignoring me, or passed out and unable to hear me. When I knocked and he didn’t answer, I ventured in to the second set of doors and tried again.

  “Yeah?” So, he was up.

  “Can I come in?”

  “Depends. You going to keep kicking me while I’m down? Beating me like a dead horse?” he pouted.

  That was the closest thing I’d get to an invitation, so I took it. “You know that’s not my goal.”

  “Then what is? I’m not going to cry if that’s what you’re hoping for.”

  The sounds of my chu
ckling weren’t what he wanted to hear, either, so I stopped. “All bullshit aside, it’s like you flipped a switch this afternoon. I’m just trying to understand where you’re coming from.”

  “She drove three hours not knowing what she’d find or if she’d even be able to get to you.”

  “Masyn?” My voice rose with surprise when I said her name.

  His brow furrowed, wondering why I was confused. “Yeah, Masyn. Who else?”

  “You can’t seriously be jealous. She would’ve done the same for you.”

  He shook his head. “Not in the same way. Not without you. And you wouldn’t have come without her. And it has nothing to do with the two of you sleeping together. It’s been that way for years… I just didn’t see it until today.”

  I sat down next to him on the bed and leaned back on my hands. “Seems like getting two friends for the price of one works out in your favor.”

  “There was a time when it wasn’t that way. The three of us came as a unit.” He lay on the bed with a hollow thump, like he might sink into a ton of feathers.

  “Beau, we’ve grown up. You made new friends in a new city. A week ago, you were getting married. That daily life didn’t include either of us in it, either. That didn’t change the fact that the moment you stepped back into town, Masyn and I were at your side.”

  “As shitty as Saturday was, standing at the register in Wilson’s with you and having Nancy ask if she wanted to know what we were up to, it was like high school all over again. I was on the verge of a colossal mess, and the two of us were in our own world.” Clearly nostalgia had sent him barreling down a fictional path—high school was in the past, and so was a life without responsibility.

  “The two of us?” I asked.

  “Yeah, me and you.”

  “You mean without Masyn?” I made sure to clarify, allowing him to lead me to the point I needed to make.

  “She wasn’t there.”

  “Exactly. You want to say she came here for me, okay, yeah, she did. Great. But I came looking for you on my own last Saturday. And you left the church with Masyn—not me—that day.”

  His expression was hard to read, almost blank. “I don’t follow.”

  “We each pick up where the other leaves off. No one’s abandoned you, Beau.” I let out a loud exhale, hoping he’d see the three of us were a continuation of the each other just like we’d always been.

  “I don’t have friends here like I did in Harden. I’ve got friends, that’s not what I mean. We just don’t have any history. And I don’t think I’ll ever share the bond the three of us have with anyone else.”

  “Why do you have to?”

  “I miss it. I’m empty.” Finally, an admission of truth. Beau missed the comradery the three of us shared.

  “Then come home. I’ve got a spare bedroom and an extra key. You don’t have to stay with your parents. Just don’t jump from the frying pan into the fire. No one will think any less of you for coming back after what went down last weekend.”

  “I’m sure Masyn would love that,” sarcasm dripped from his tongue.

  “Could be fun, the three of us living together. Maybe you could help me talk her into giving up that house and staying at my place.” I slapped him on the leg and stood. Before I left his room, I hesitated and then confessed, “I didn’t tell you to go to work tomorrow because I don’t want you at the hospital. I don’t want you to let the shadows of your past hold you back from a brilliant future.”

  “Thanks, Lee.”

  The lights were off when I got to our room. I had to count the doors to make sure I was in the right place. If Masyn were asleep, turning the light on would likely wake her up. I softly closed the door behind me and waited for my eyes to adjust to the dark. Once I could see my hand in front of my face, I toed off my shoes and got undressed. Masyn had found the remote for the ceiling fan and turned the place into an icebox.

  As quietly as I could, I eased under the blankets. My head hit the pillow, and Masyn popped up like a weasel.

  “Jesus, you scared the hell out of me. Why didn’t you tell me you were awake when I came in?”

  “I was half-asleep until I felt the bed shift. Is everything okay with Beau?”

  I snaked my arm under her head and pulled her into my side, finding her completely naked. “No. But it will be.”

  “Felicity really messed him up.”

  I kissed the top of her head before responding. “I don’t think it’s just her. I think Beau’s spent so much of his life trying to be everything that was expected of him that he forgot to figure out who he actually is. He’ll figure it out.”

  “Do you believe he’ll stay in Atlanta?”

  “Depends on how big his balls are.”

  She smacked me playfully on the chest. “Gross. That’s so crass.”

  “Masyn.” I turned slightly to my side, still keeping her close enough to feel the warmth of her skin on mine. “His parents gave him the down payment on the house. He got a job with help from his dad. He’s been working on connections in Atlanta for years now. His path was laid for him years ago. In order to escape, he has to let down people he loves and carry on the charade.”

  “That’s awful. But it kind of explains the outbursts.”

  “The Chastains are good people. And if they knew he wanted something else, I think they’d be open to it. He has to find the courage to tell them, and he can’t do that until he figures out what it is he thinks he’s missing.”

  “What if that’s Harden?”

  “I offered him a room at my house.” Her hair was still damp from her shower, so I kissed her temple and inhaled the rosemary scent of her shampoo.

  She stiffened, and her soft breasts brushed against my chest. “That’s my room!”

  “You still need your own room?” I dragged my fingernails along her smooth thigh and smiled at the goose bumps it stirred. Somewhere in the distance, the air conditioner hummed to life, so I reached for the thick comforter and drew it over our heads, cocooning us in a warm cave.

  “It makes life easier,” she replied, her tone husky, “when you’re in the doghouse.” She followed that with a minty kiss that made me dizzy.

  “Oh? Does that mean you won’t be flouncing back across town when I piss you off?” I chuckled quietly and worked my way down her silky neck to that spot where her pulse beat out of control just above her collarbone. I licked and kissed and nipped her skin. The faint flavor of soap spread over my tongue.

  She moaned, wound her arms around my head, and arched her body upward, her pebbled nipples grazing my chest. “You don’t piss me off—and I don’t flounce!”

  “Masyn, please. I make you madder than an old red hen at least once a day. So, if you need your own room to stew in, tell me now, or you may end up having to bunk with Beau.” It was hard to focus on the conversation when every inch of her teased all of my senses.

  Even as my lips trailed her skin, she never missed a beat. “You act like I’m never going home and that this might really be an issue. I stay at my place most nights, anyhow. If Beau needs my room, I’ll loan it to him.”

  “That’s an issue we need to revisit when we get home.” I sucked one of her pert nipples into my mouth, sucking on it and swirling my tongue around her peak.

  She gasped, either in pleasure or surprise—I didn’t care which. “What?”

  “Your place.”

  She pushed me back, halting my attempt at seduction to force my attention to the conversation and not her pleasure. “At least once a week we have this conversation. I swear, Lee. It’s perfectly safe. In the two years I’ve lived there, nothing has ever happened in my neighborhood.”

  “We can agree to disagree. The arrest record in the morning papers tells the truth. But that’s neither here nor there.” I attempted to lean back in, but Masyn was insistent on talking.

  “Then what is?” Her tone was firm, and there was no way she was letting me off the hook.

  I pushed the covers down as I threw m
yself onto my back and covered my face with my arm. “I don’t want there to be a ‘your place’ and ‘my place.’ I want it to be ours.”

  “You want me to move in? But you said you offered my room to Beau.” Her voice softened, moving through the room like wind.

  This was one of those times where I was fairly certain Masyn knew exactly what I was getting at, yet she chose to pretend she didn’t in order to force me to say the words she wanted to hear. “I want you next to me every night, in our bed, in our room.”

  “Lee…”

  “We’ve been playing house for years. I’m tired of playing. Life’s too short, and without a guarantee of tomorrow, I want a promise of today—with you.”

  A subtle smile formed on her lips, and the moon highlighted her delicate features. “People are going to talk.” Her grip on me tightened, and she slid her leg over mine.

  I wedged my knee between her legs, eased her thighs open, and adjusted my body between them. “They’re going to talk, regardless. Might as well give them something to make their day interesting.”

  The barely audible gasp she released when I rolled my hips and slipped into her tight warmth ignited desire deep inside me. Being with Masyn was a full-body experience like nothing I’d ever felt before. My skin tingled, heat spread from my lips to my toes, and the urge to satisfy her burned like kindling, until we became one and erupted into a blazing inferno. It wasn’t a firecracker with a short fuse, it was the whole damn Fourth of July display. And when it was over, the bursts of light still hung behind my eyelids.

  Each time I was with her proved better than the last and cemented the fact that we belonged together. We’d spent seventeen years falling in love, and this was the final piece to our puzzle. Lying there in the dark as our breathing returned to normal and she’d resumed her spot on my side, I asked again, this time hoping for an answer instead of a conversation.

  “Will you move in with me?” If she hadn’t been listening, the sounds of the night might have stolen the words away, but I felt her cheek move with her smile.