Explicit Instruction

by Scarlett Finn

  ‘Did anyone touch you...? Did they...?’

  ‘No one raped me,’ she said. ‘If that’s what you’re asking.’

  ‘That won’t last.’

  Rushe didn’t know how to sugar coat anything. ‘Why are you here?’ she asked. ‘Why are you locked up?’

  ‘You heard them out there, they don’t trust me.’

  ‘Why not?’ she asked. ‘I thought once you were... you didn’t have sex with Simone?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘When you refused, they put you in here,’ Flick said.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘They think you’re a cop. They can’t just kill you if you’re law enforcement, because that would bring their house down.’

  ‘I guess.’

  ‘Victor’s a piece of work,’ she said. ‘He asked for information.’

  Rushe tensed, and while his body went rigid, his embrace loosened. ‘What did you tell them?’

  ‘Nothing,’ she said. ‘I don’t know anything.’

  ‘Victor asked you questions?’

  ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘But he got angry when I wouldn’t answer them, and that’s when he sent me out with John and Shiv, who brought me back here.’

  ‘John? What did he ask?’

  ‘They wanted to know about you, about anything you’ve told me, about anything I saw.’

  That last statement made him draw back, and Flick was left alone on the floor when he separated himself from her to sit a few feet away. ‘What did you tell them?’

  God he was good, that anger was back and he ground his teeth together. ‘I told them that you had a monster stuffed animal collection,’ she said, but he only glared.

  Now he could look her in the eye, now that he was angry with her. Distance was so much easier to accept than familiarity.

  Flick used the bed to pull herself up, and she slithered onto it letting every muscle in her body loosen.

  ‘What are you doing?’ he demanded. ‘Tell me what you said!’

  Flick didn’t even bother to open her eyes. From the angle of his voice, she knew he was on his feet, and at the side of the bed. But letting her swollen cheek sink into the mattress Flick took this last chance to rest.

  ‘I didn’t tell them anything,’ she said. ‘Why do you think I’m cold, and wet, and covered in bruises? Do I look like someone who blabbed to save themselves?’

  ‘They tortured you,’ he whispered.

  ‘They didn’t get onto the fierce looking metal instruments, so don’t trouble yourself. I told them that yes, you were worth dying for, even though you were fucking another woman at that moment in time. Or we thought you were.’ Flick couldn’t open her eyes. ‘Now if you don’t mind I haven’t slept or eaten since I got here, and the adrenaline’s wearing off. So unless you’re willing to share your body heat, then leave me alone... please.’

  Rushe didn’t say anything else, so she took that as a sign that he’d conceded his argument. If Flick had told them what they wanted to know she’d probably be dead right now. Shiv certainly would’ve taken great pleasure in cutting her, since that was his thing as Rushe had told her. Skeeve might be allowed to take a turn with her, but she doubted Shiv had that kind of restraint; acknowledging that pertinent fact actually made Flick feel better because she’d rather be dead than let Skeeve come anywhere near her. But if they beat her again, or she was restrained, or unconscious, she’d never be able to fight him off.

  Skeeve would be the tip of a large iceberg if she went out with the other women tomorrow. Flick didn’t know if women were trafficked in this country, or if they’d be taken overseas. The logistics weren’t what concerned her, but she knew nothing about this barbarity. Like most of the population, they were words without meaning for her, not any true meaning because how could society face this ugly exploitation? That humanity was possible of such atrocious acts really dismayed her, as it would the vast majority of people.

  But when she was gone from here Rushe would be left alone. Not that she was much use to him when she was here, but Flick would wonder about him. She’d always think of him, the last man to ever make love to her.

  At the touch of skin, her reflex was to pounce away, but Rushe scooped her up from the bed then draped her over him, just as he’d done in the shack, only this time it was different. Flick let herself look up at him, but with one hand behind his head, and the other on her hair, Rushe focused on the ceiling.

  Flick pressed her lips to his torso, and gently rubbed her cheek on him, then let her body slacken a little. Eventually they would come to get her, or take Rushe away. They lay here together on this narrow bed with the knowledge that a bomb hid under them. Only this bomb didn’t have a timer that they could watch the seconds descend on. Without warning, they would be torn apart, and when they were Flick knew they’d never see each other again.

  A piercing scream jolted Flick awake, and on springing upward her knee landed in his abdomen. But she ignored Rushe’s displeasure to take quick stock of her surroundings; a room, painted black, the bed here in the corner, and Rushe.

  ‘Rushe,’ she sighed out, and flopped back down onto him.

  ‘A harsh wake up call,’ he grumbled.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, squeezing her hand between them to pat the part of him she’d kneed.

  ‘No problem. Just don’t aim further south next time.’

  Everywhere was sore with bruises and tense muscles, but lying out on Rushe was an experience she’d missed. ‘What time is it?’

  ‘Eleven thirty,’ he said, and she had to peek at him.

  ‘How do you know that?’ He took his hand from the back of his head to show his watch on his wrist.

  ‘Ah,’ she said, settling down again. ‘At night, or in the morning?’

  ‘PM,’ he said. ‘We’ve got about four hours.’

  ‘Until what?’ she asked, stretching her body over his while she yawned. His lack of a response was unsettling. ‘Until what?’

  Flick sat up, letting her knees part over him, she straddled his stomach, and at the reminder of her apparel, she looked down. Flesh touched flesh. While she still wore her thong, it didn’t offer much of a barrier between them.

  ‘I’m not having sex with you,’ he said.

  Replaying his words, she smiled at him. ‘Isn’t that what I’m supposed to say?’

  ‘I know what happens when you get that look,’ he said. ‘And I’m not having sex with you.’

  ‘Not that I’m saying I want to, but why not?’

  ‘I don’t know if they’re listening.’

  As though a bug would suddenly become neon when he said the magic words, Flick looked around. ‘Listening?’

  ‘It’s the only reason I can come up with that they would put us together.’

  ‘Sure,’ she said. ‘Except they seem to enjoy watching us squirm.’

  ‘I’ve done everything I can to protect you. I’ve played all my cards. I pushed you away time and time again, for your own good.’

  ‘I know. I just want you to be honest with me. Please do that for me now. No more games, no more lies and misdirection. After tonight... we’ll never see each other again.’

  ‘I’m sorry you got involved, Kitten,’ he said, dropping a hand to her hip.

  ‘It’s not your fault,’ she said, tentatively touching at her face to explore her bumps and bruises.

  ‘It is my fault,’ he said. ‘You’re here right now because of me.’

  ‘I’m not,’ she said. ‘I walked into Dell’s of my own free will. How many times do we have to go over this?’

  ‘This isn’t about Dell’s, not anymore.’

  ‘So what’s it about?’

  ‘You’re here because... because they know I care about you,’ he hissed through grit teeth.

  ‘That wasn’t so painful, was it?’ she said, placing a hand over his heart. ‘The walls didn’t come tumbling down, did they?’

  ‘I’ve never...’ His expression remained as static as ever, but she saw him swallow
away the foul taste of his words. ‘I’ve never cared about anyone before. I cared about the job, but I... I didn’t know it felt like this.’

  ‘I make you weak,’ she said.

  ‘Yeah, and I resent the hell out of you for it but... any resolve I’ve had before, in the past... I’d do anything to keep you safe, Kitten. I might not be much use to you right now, but—‘

  ‘This is not your fault,’ she soothed with her words.

  ‘You’re here because of me.’

  ‘I missed you,’ she said. ‘If nothing else comes of this, then I’m happy I got to see you again.’ Sliding her hand up his chest she cupped his cheek and leaned in. ‘You’re a good man, Rushe. If you saw yourself as I see you...’

  ‘I‘m not a cop.’

  ‘I know,’ she said.

  ‘So whatever fantasy you have about a shining hero... you know?’

  ‘I know why you’re here,’ Flick said.

  ‘How can you possibly...?’

  Flick didn’t need to know the specifics, but she didn’t have to. He’d come here with purpose, and it was a purpose greater than himself. But law enforcement was a stretch too far. Cops could smile, they didn’t hate the world like he did, they weren’t strangers to caring for others in the way Rushe was.

  ‘I trust you,’ she whispered. ‘That’s how I know.’

  ‘When I walked out of that room with Simone—‘

  ‘What could you have done?’ she asked. ‘I thought about fighting too. I thought about escaping, but where could I go? This is an impossible situation for both of us.’

  Rushe took his hands under her hair to hold the back of her neck, his thumbs resting over her ears. ‘I want to have sex with you,’ he said.

  ‘That was a quick turn around.’

  ‘But I think it’s because...’

  ‘It’s the only way you think you’re capable of comforting me, or showing me how you feel.’

  ‘Look at what they did to your beautiful face,’ he said, and stroked over her bruises with such hesitancy her eyes misted again. ‘Am I hurting you?’

  ‘No,’ she said, snatching his hand back to her cheek.

  ‘You’ve got a black eye, and the blood, the—‘

  ‘Bruises heal,’ she said. ‘Hearing you admit that you care about me... it’s worth every single one of them.’

  With almost apprehension, Rushe lifted his head and traced his lips on hers. Her cuts didn’t make for much thorough kissing, and she couldn’t let him taste her tongue for fear that he’d taste her blood too. But such a simple, gentle kiss was more than that. They’d done hungry for each other, and much as that lingered, this joining was so much more powerful.

  Flick rested her lips on his, then slid her hands between them and unbuttoned his jeans. Rushe took his head back, and she read his uncertainty, but he didn’t stop her. Taking his erection from its confines, she wriggled down. Flick nudged her underwear aside, and so very slowly let his member kiss her opening, then as her eyes closed in the ecstasy they anticipated, she sat up on him. Committing every second of the delicious slither that impaled her onto him, Flick didn’t let herself forget a detail.

  Still in her dream, she took his tee-shirt up over her head to present her full naked body for him. But he didn’t touch her, and as she moved up and down on him, Flick took her own breasts into her hands and brushed her nipples with her fingertips in a reminder of him.

  Though he was here, he wasn’t with her, and while still bouncing on his penis, she opened her eyes and let their gazes join. The very second she saw the love in his eyes she yelped out at orgasm. The arrangement of his features was foreign, because the love on his face was more than a smile. The torture of that love, and his powerlessness to prevent her pain, made fresh moisture escape from Flick’s eyes, but she didn’t let it deter or impede her.

  Him in her like this, the depth of him against her most sensitive space filled her with that power she always drew from him. Flick had found her sass in defiance of this adversity, because she knew Rushe would expect nothing less of his woman.

  She didn’t care if they were listening, she didn’t even care if they were watching. As long as she had Rushe here with her, in her, Flick would make the most of every second and wouldn’t cower in the face of their aggressors triumph. They could watch and jeer as much as they wanted because she had something they could never take away.

  At the thought of it, Rushe sat up as though reading her mind. He closed his arms around her and kept her body there pressed to his. He kissed her hair, her forehead, her temple, all on a descent to her ear. Flick tipped her head to the side, giving him all the access he wanted to her neck. But when he kissed her jaw, then the groove behind her ear lobe, she realised he was whispering something to her.

  The words didn’t fully register, but he said them again. If she’d thought she appreciated him talking in bed before, this was the jackpot, and more than she could ever have dreamed of.

  ‘I love you, Kitten,’ he exhaled into her ear, while still kissing all around the area where he could reach. ‘I’ve never in my life... I love you.’

  He brought the joyful sob out of her throat, and she snatched his head to force his mouth to hers too. Brushing her lips back and forth on his, she strangled her arms around his neck, because they couldn’t be close enough, and she wanted to exist in time with his body.

  ‘I love you too,’ she breathed onto his lips.

  This was it, after this there was nothing but terror. Wherever she ended up, and no matter what happened to him, she needed him to know, to understand, what she felt for him. To know the bond that blazed them together no matter their physical distance.

  Then with such care, he cradled her body against his, and lifted her against him. With such tender devotion, Rushe laid her down on the bed, and held himself inside her.

  ‘I can’t let them have you,’ he said, with his gaze locked on her. ‘I can’t do it, Flick.’

  ‘You have to,’ she said, enjoying the mass of him occupying its home inside her. ‘If you try anything they’ll kill you.’ Flick caressed his stubbled jaw. ‘If they kill you... they get me anyway.’

  ‘You can’t ask me to... I can’t let them hurt you anymore. I don’t care what happens to me. When I saw what they’d done to you, what they’ve done. I wanna kill them. I wanna kill them all.’

  She knew the ferocity of that expression. ‘They’ll get what’s coming to them,’ she said. ‘You have to worry about getting yourself out of here. You have to gain your freedom from them. Let me go. Let them send me wherever they want to... I’ll always be your whore.’ And this time when she whispered that word she meant it as an endearment, but confusion melted into his anger.

  ‘I love you, Flick,’ he breathed, though she wasn’t sure he said it to her. ‘I didn’t know I could... fuck...’

  Flick didn’t know when he’d realised his love for her, but if his melancholy was anything to go by it was very recently – like since they started making love.

  ‘Make love to me,’ Flick said, pushing his hair up from his forehead. ‘Show me how you feel.’

  When their eyes met again his confusion cleared, his anger evaporated, and with stiff muscles, his cheek twitched then he relaxed and... smiled at her.

  His whole face changed, and his eyes lit up when he shone that beautiful joy down on her. Their odds couldn’t get any longer, but while they were here in this room, on this bed, joined together, the world was a beautiful place.

  Chapter Twelve

  They’d made love again, and again, and every time he pulled out before coming. Certainly, the last thing she wanted was to find herself pregnant, when she was out there with the lowest form of life on the planet. If she found herself carrying his baby and was force to abort, or have it taken from her, she wouldn’t be able to live with herself.

  Except she wouldn’t have much of a life to look forward to, which brought her back to the thought that kept recurring. Soon all choice would be taken from h
er, and she would be subjected to whatever her “owner” chose to demand.

  Lying here in the cocoon of Rushe’s body Flick knew that if she wanted her dignity, if she wanted to exercise any free will, there was only one thing for it.

  ‘Do you remember...?’ Flick said, while she spooned in front of Rushe facing into the corner. His body represented a barrier between her and the evil in this place, and while the protection was an illusion, the gesture was cherished.

  ‘Remember what?’ he asked, stroking her neck, her shoulder, her hair, her back.

  When they’d met he wasn’t this tactile. Gradually it had built up, now he couldn’t stop touching her, and Flick anticipated every caress.

  ‘When I was here the first time, upstairs in that room.’

  ‘Yeah,’ he said.

  ‘You... when you found out that I’d only been with two men.’

  ‘What about it?’ Rushe asked. ‘You better have a damn good point to make if you’re bringing that up.’

  In spite of herself, Flick smiled at the memory of what he’d said to her in the car after she’d hand-fed him the MnM’s. But then the gravity of her decision wiped her contentment away.

  ‘You said something to me...’

  ‘What did I say?’ he asked, kissing her hair. ‘Did I hurt your feelings, Kitten?’

  Still he could make her smile with his teasing, but they were running out of time. There was no more putting this off. ‘You said... you said that you’d... rather than watch them put me through this... that you would...’

  His hand stopped. ‘Yeah?’

  ‘You said you’d rather see me dead, than watch them put me through this.’

  Rushe didn’t say anything. Flick wasn’t very sure what he was thinking, or even what he was doing, because he remained stiff as a board behind her.

  ‘Would you do it?’ she whispered, and waited through the silence. But she counted to sixty twice, and he still hadn’t said anything. ‘Rushe?’

  In an instant his body left hers, making her lurch back into his now vacant space on the bed. When she rolled to seek him out, she saw him pacing while clenching his fists.