Endless Winter (Book 2): Rain & Ruin

by Theresa Shaver

  My throat and mouth are so dry I can barely swallow so I crawl to the kitchen and use the counter to pull myself up where I hang over the sink and nudge the faucet open. The first sip from my shaking, cupped hand is heaven even as the majority of the water slides down my face and soaks into my shirt. I keep taking tiny sips from my cupped hand until my stomach starts to hurt so I just lay my cheek against the cool counter and try and get my breathing under control. My chest hurts with every breath but slowly my heart starts to settle down and the pressure on my lungs becomes bearable. I open my eyes and try to stand upright but the world tilts dizzyingly so I put my head back down again.

  I have never felt so wretched in my whole life but I need to get it under control and find Ben. The last memory I have that wasn’t a dream was of Ben passed out on the floor. Anything that happened after that is a blank. I don’t know how I ended up in my room or where Ben is and I have to fight hard to keep the panic I’m feeling from overwhelming my body. Based on how weak and shaky I feel, I’ve been sick and I don’t know how long I was out. I need answers. My voice is nothing more than a hoarse croak but it’s enough.

  “AIRIA, where is Ben?”

  “Skylar Ross, Benjamin Ross is located in the barracks.”

  Frack! What’s he doing over there? I told him how I felt about us mixing with the other people and he went and…wait, “AIRIA, Ben’s not authorized to open those doors! Who opened the doors for him?”

  “Skylar Ross, Rex Larson, authorization level green, opened the doors.”

  What the frack is going on? How long have I been out of it? My head’s spinning now physically and mentally from confusion. I try again.

  “AIRIA, how did Rex get a green authorization and how long was I out of it?”

  “Skylar Ross, you approved Rex Larson’s authorization level and you have been unconscious for three days and six hours.”

  Holy crap, none of this makes sense so I’ll figure it out later. Right now I need to get Ben back. I need to see him with my own eyes to make sure he’s safe. I push slowly upright this time and manage to keep my balance so I carefully work my way down the counter and get across the gap to the bathroom where I take care of some much needed business. After washing my face and teeth and sipping more water, I start to feel somewhat better. I know I’m not going to make it very far in my condition but I’m willing to take that chance to get Ben back where he belongs. I can push through this and collapse after that. I catch a whiff of three days’ worth of the same clothes and decide to remedy that before going to the barracks.

  Using the kitchen counter again to steady myself, I stop and pull a stale bun from a container on the counter as well as a juice box from the cupboard. I figure even a few bites will help bolster my strength and the sugar in the juice will help as well. I nibble away at the bun as I make my way back to my room and change into non-stinky clothes before strapping on my holster and gun from the closet. When Ben’s safety is a concern, I will no longer take any chances. I don’t know what’s going on in the barracks but it’s time I stopped being the sad, sucky girl I’ve been for the last week or so and got back to being the strong, fierce protector of Ben. It’s time I took control and this time I plan on keeping it!

  By the time I’m at the door to the tunnel, I’ve finished my bun and juice and feel steadier on my feet. I’m definitely still very sick but I feel like I’m strong enough for right now to do whatever I need to, to get Ben back. I take a minute to rest and steady my breathing again when I get to the barracks entrance. I don’t remember the tunnel being so long and I need a minute before I go through.

  Once I’m rested and feel stronger again, I palm open the door and step through into the office area. I head down the hall to the barracks without another thought. Ben’s in there somewhere and I’m going to do whatever it takes to bring him home.

  My eyes widen in shock when I see how different the barracks are from the last time I was in here. I grip the door frame and scan the huge area for any sign of my brother. All the bunks have been moved into groups leaving huge open areas that have been filled with tables. To my eyes, so long unaccustomed to seeing other people it seems like there are hundreds of them moving around the different areas. I feel my chest tighten up even more than it already is with claustrophobia. I need to go out there in those crowds to find Ben. I shove the fear aside and push off from the frame and head straight to the middle area that used to be filled with bunks. It has the most people there and someone is going to tell me where to find my brother.

  I grit my teeth against the feeling that the walls and ceiling are getting closer as I step closer and closer to the crowd of people. I try and swallow the dryness in my throat away so I can yell my questions without getting too close but all the water I drank seems to have disappeared from my body. I’m going to have to get closer.

  I move a little further until I’m only about ten feet from one of the new tables that has people I don’t recognise sitting at it but before I have a chance to call out, my arm is grabbed and I’m being swung around.

  “What do you think you’re doing here? What happened to, “this is your side and that’s my side”? I guess Queen Skylar doesn’t have to follow her own rules, huh?”

  She’s spitting out the words as she spins me around and just finishing her condescending sentence when I come face to face with her. My gun’s in my hand the minute she grabbed my arm and the follow through brings the barrel up right between her eyes. Eyes that go from hurtful and nasty to wide and terrified. For as much as my legs feel like they are shaky noodles, my hand is rock steady. This is a target I can focus on. This is pain and suffering and fear. This took away any chance I had for a happier future. The hoarseness of my dry throat makes my words come out even more threatening than I had planned.

  “Where is my brother?”

  Her hand comes up halfway like she’s going to plead with me to stop and her head gives a tiny shake like she’s afraid to do more. I take a half step closer to her so the barrel of my gun is only an inch away from her forehead and raise my eyebrow. I won’t ask again.

  Somewhere deep inside of me I’m horrified at what I’m doing and I fear that after killing Ted, the second one won’t be as hard. As I wait for an answer my mind goes through good angel, bad angel. Does this girl really deserve to die for what she’s done? Do I take a chance that she’ll do something even worse in the future? Am I really a cold blooded killer now? Am I willing to do whatever it takes to protect myself and Ben?

  Before any of these questions can be answered, I see movement rushing towards me and a loud voice starts to call out.

  “Whoa, ladies, cool your coconuts! Mellow your melons! Hakuna your tatas!”

  I haven’t taken my eyes off of Sasha, so I see the changes of expression on her face that must exactly match my own, amazed disbelief that morphs into outrage. We both turn our heads towards him at the exact same time. There’s Marsh with his hands up and a huge fake grin that shows all of his teeth. Did he just say…?

  I turn my head back to Sasha and she’s looking me in the eye but no longer terrified by the gun pointed at her head. Instead she gets a small smirk on her face and says,

  “Can you shoot him instead? Maybe just a little bit? Like in the leg?”

  I feel my own lips tug up towards a grin in sisterly solidarity and it’s enough to bring me out of the dangerous haze I was in. I let the gun fall to my side and holster it. In seconds it feels like it weighs a hundred pounds. I give Sasha a weary nod and turn to look for Ben again. He’s the reason I’m here, not my quarrel with Sasha. What I see brings the panic and claustrophobia roaring back. Faces surround me. There’re all looking at me with frowns of disapproval or angry expressions. I try and spin away but they are all around me and I feel the giant cavern start pressing down on me. I try and find a break in the crowd so I can run but it’s a wall of people and they’re ALL STARING AT ME! My breathing turns to gasps as my chest tightens and I fight for every breath.

&
nbsp; There, there’s movement and the crowd starts to part so I lunge towards it only to come to a stop because there’s Ben. He’s in a wheelchair and his expression is one I’ve never seen before. It’s like he doesn’t even know me. That doctor is standing behind him holding the handles of his chair. He’s talking to me but all I can see is the look on Ben’s face and I can’t bear it so I look away and then there’s Rex. Rex, who wants to be with me and wants to talk to me and work things out, except this Rex looks disgusted with me. I can barely breathe now and all those faces are starting to blur and the ceiling is pressing down against my head and all I can do is RUN!

  I push through the blurry angry faces and stagger free but the ceiling is still coming down so I hunch my shoulders and move my broken body as fast as I can back towards the offices and then the tunnel. I think I hear someone calling my name but it’s hard to hear over the roaring sound of the ceiling coming down so I just stagger on. I bounce from wall to wall until I can’t go any further and my legs give out and I fall down to the cold concrete floor of the tunnel. I just lay there and wait to suffocate. My lungs aren’t working anymore but that doesn’t matter because the ceiling is all the way down and about to crush me. It’s over, so I just let go and hope I’ll be with Mom and Dad soon.

  Chapter Fifteen - Rex

  Ethan takes Ben over to the clinic while I push the cart full of milk jugs to the kitchen. By the way the people working in the kitchen reacted, you would think I was delivering molten gold instead of fresh milk. I swear, one of the women even has tears in her eyes. I tell them that Ethan recommended that the milk be given out to all children and everyone happily agrees.

  I leave the kitchen in search of my brother with a satisfied feeling but wishing Skylar was here to see just how happy her unknown contributions have made people. As I walk through the barracks I can’t help but feel proud of the way these people have all come together since we arrived to organize and create a functioning home. The sign-up sheets Lance had created and printed from the office computers are full of people who want to work. The garden grow area is already full of soil and seeds from the bags taken from the storage containers. The cooking and cleaning lists have plenty of volunteers signed up so no one person is stuck with all the grunt work. So far everyone is getting along and happy to have such a safe place to stay but I wonder if it will stay that way. At the hotel, all these people were kept under Ted and his men’s heavy thumb so no one dared to cause any trouble. I worry that once the shine of safety and comfort wears off there might be issues.

  As I scan the different groups for Matty, I put it out of my mind for now. I have enough to worry about with Sky being so sick.

  A small body hurtles into me from the side causing me to stagger. Looks like the kid’s found me instead. I snatch him up and throw him over my shoulder and spin around causing him to laugh like a loon before depositing him back on his feet.

  “REX! Are you back for good? Is Skylar and Ben all better? Can I see Ben?”

  “Whoa there pal! Ben’s doing a lot better and he’s over in the clinic with Ethan getting another x-ray so yes, we can go visit with him for a few minutes before he heads back to his place. Skylar, well, she’s still pretty sick so I’m going back over to stay with her for a while more.” I tell him and give his messy hair a rub.

  He frowns at the news that I’m going back so I tell him my plan. “I really need your help but I’m not sure if you’re old enough to help me.”

  “Yes I am! I’m totally old enough for…uhh what is it?”

  I laugh at this instant declaration even when he doesn’t know what I’m asking. “Well, Sky and Ben’s animals need to be looked after. The cow needs to be milked and its stall needs to be cleaned out. The chickens need to be fed and the eggs collected as well. Do you think you’re big enough to handle that with me?”

  Matty places his hands on his hips and scowls at me. “Of course I am! Ben showed me how to do it already when they first gave us the tour over there. It’s easy! I don’t even need you to do it with me. I can do it all by myself!”

  I throw my arm around his neck in a loose head lock and pull him along with me towards the clinic.

  “Yeah, yeah, I’m sure you could manage a whole farm by yourself but I think I’ll stick around to help out this time. Come on Farmer Joe, let’s go see if Ethan’s ready to head back over yet.”

  Ben easily slips out of the headlock and starts strutting beside me while pretending to have his thumbs stuck under imaginary suspenders. He has me chuckling with his sad attempt at a farmer’s accent. “HYuck, hyuck, hyuck. I’m Farmer Joe and I’m gonna milk me some cows.”

  We’ve just reached the clinic’s doors when I hear raised voices coming from the center of the barracks. I turn to look back and my mouth drops. That’s Sky over there and she’s pointing a gun at someone’s head! The crowd shifts and I get a look at who it is. I curse under my breath, of course it’s Sasha. I’m thrilled to see Sky awake and on her feet but the gun in her hand has me panicking. I can just image what she felt when she woke up and found Ben missing. I’m about to sprint over to them when the doors behind me open up and Ethan pushes Ben through in his wheelchair. I yell at him over my shoulder, even as I start running.

  “Sky’s over there and she’s got a gun! Bring Ben so she knows he’s ok!”

  I figure I’ll beat them to Sky and get her calmed down but it seems like every person in the barracks has moved into my way so by the time I push a path through the crowd Ethan and Ben are right on my heels. The crowd finally parts all the way and I get a good up close look at Sky. She’s lowering her gun and puts it back into her holster but she looks awful. I can tell something is seriously wrong right away. Her chest is hitching like she’s just run a marathon and her face is paper white with black and blue circles under her eyes. But it’s what’s in her eyes that worry me the most. They’re full of terror and confusion. She spins around in a circle like a trapped animal trying to find a way to escape until her eyes find Ben.

  Ethan tries to calm her down.

  “Skylar, it’s ok! I was just taking Ben for an x-ray and then bringing him right back. You’ve both been very sick.”

  I can tell she’s not hearing him at all. Her eyes dart away from Ben and meet mine. What I see in them breaks my heart. She’s lost in confusion and panic and I don’t think she even really sees me in front of her. There’s small agonizing gasps coming from her that scare me. She’s way too sick to be trying to deal with any of this. I go to reach out to her but she spins away and charges through the crowd with her shoulders hunched over like she thinks someone’s going to hit her at any moment.

  “SKY, Skylar!” I shout after her but she keeps going back towards the offices. I turn to Ethan and see that Ben is sobbing.

  “We have to go after her. She’s not thinking straight! Bring Ben, she’s going to need to see that he’s ok.”

  I don’t wait for an answer, just spin and chase after her. I can’t believe she’s even still on her feet let alone running, after being unconscious for three days but she disappears into the office hallway ahead of me. I hit the hallway at top speed and immediately crash into Lance sending us both to the floor. I try and scramble away from him but he grabs me by the arms and holds me still.

  “What the hell is going on? Was that Skylar I just saw running past? She doesn’t look very good!”

  “Let go! I’ve got to get to her, Lance. She doesn’t know what she’s doing right now. She needs help!”

  I finally shake off his hands, stumble to my feet and lunge to the tunnel doors. As soon as they slide open I see her. She’s not even half way back to her side and she’s laying on the concrete floor. No, no, no, she has to be ok! I reach her in seconds and drop down beside her. My hands reach out to touch her but they freeze half way. Her eyes are open but they’re fixed on somewhere that’s not here. She’s on her side in the fetal position with her arms crossed in front of her chest. Her whole body jerks with every hitch of her chest a
s she tries to force air into her lungs. I know it’s not working because her lips have a blue tinge to them.

  I’ve seen a lot of damaged people since the bombs dropped but never like this. I don’t know how to fix this but I hope Ethan can. I reach over and slide my arms underneath her and gently cradle her against my chest before pushing to my feet. I’m afraid of jostling her if I run even though both my heart and head are screaming for me to. So I walk quickly instead back towards the barracks. I’m not letting go of her even with one hand so when I get a few feet from the door I yell at the computer.

  “AIRIA, open the tunnel door.”

  The doors start sliding open even as the reply comes.

  “Rex Larson, Skylar Ross’s vital signs are deteriorating quickly. Medical treatment is needed.”

  I don’t bother responding because the doors open revealing Ethan and Ben in his wheelchair on the other side.

  “Rex, I’m not authorized to open…” He takes one look at Skylar and stops what he was going to say. Instead he turns Ben’s chair around and pushes it towards Lance who is standing there with them.

  “Take Ben into our suite and keep him there. He doesn’t need to see his sister like this!”

  Without even looking at Lance for his reply, he’s turned back to me and reaching for Sky’s neck to check her pulse. His face tells me all I need to know and we both start moving as fast as I can with Skylar in my arms. I ignore Ben’s screaming for his sister as Ethan’s yelling ahead of us for people to get out of the way. I don’t even see them because my eyes are locked on the doors of the clinic and hopefully what’s on the other side can save this sad broken girl.