Dying to Live

by Roxy De Winter

  “You should come away from the doors,” She told him anxiously.

  “It’s fine, look,” Aiden assured her, gesturing at the glass. “They haven’t even noticed me.”

  Courtney scratched at her chin nervously. She glanced towards the window and shivered before looking away.

  “What are you playing?” She asked him.

  “We’re not playing. Soldier Frank is helping me keep watch,” Aiden told her.

  “You’re a good boy, Aiden.” Courtney smiled at him. “I’m going to go and lay back down now. Don’t stay at the windows for too long.”

  Aiden sighed, nodded and turned back to the soldier. “Let’s patrol the area, Soldier Frank.”

  At dinnertime, Harry, Stephen and Kristy returned. They had managed to clear out the first three stores and were feeling hopeful about getting another two done before the daylight failed them. Kristy had found a pamphlet with a map of the mall inside it. They agreed that it would be useful to mark off the stores that were now safe. It was disheartening for them to read that there were over two hundred stores and only three which they had managed to check off.

  “This is definitely going to take some time,” Harry was explaining to Ahmed and Zahra. If we carry on at this speed, even working every day, it’ll be well over a month before the whole place is safe.”

  “No, you no worry. Better we all safe than rush, yes?” Ahmed reassured him.

  “If I find...” Zahra fumbled for a word. “Sack!” She exclaimed. “If I find sack, you bring food back when we need, yes? Then we not run out. Take time.” She smiled at Harry and offered him a bowl of spaghetti hoops.

  Harry smiled back at her but inside he wondered whether this was actually going to work out at all. He looked around. Jess was trying to eat and read at the same time. Laura was trying to teach Sean to juggle with tennis balls and she laughed every time he let them fall. Aiden was talking to his action figure while he ate. As he took in each of their faces, he knew that he would have to suck it up and make it work, but suddenly he wished that the others had never left.

  37.

  ‘The last thing I remember was looking at the map by the overhead light, as the darkness that hid Ohio whizzed past the windows. I had ‘The Great Guide to America’ open at a map of Washington, DC. As we raced closer and closer to our destination, I became more and more concerned with finding clues about where we needed to go. The name ‘Seahorse’ had been a stumbling block for a while. I knew that water was the significance behind it but I couldn’t understand why. Many significant government buildings were close to bodies of water. The Pentagon even had its own lagoon, but I knew that whatever we were looking for would not be in plain sight. If the escape were to be made by water, citizens would surely have witnessed any amphibious vehicles that seemed out of place. Was it then, that the significance of water was purely locational? I found the answer sooner than I expected.’

  Xin trailed a slender finger along the blue line of the Potomac River. Her was brow furrowed in concentration. She frowned again and reached for the notebook that was her makeshift journal. Xin flipped it open and flicked through the pages. She was searching for a section she had asked Lucy to write, including all of the details she could give about Project Seahorse. It didn’t seem fair to wake the poor girl up to ask her about it again. As she turned page after page, the strange shape she had drawn caught her eye and gave her pause. There were more of them than she remembered doodling. They seemed to crop up on every page, sometimes in clusters. Xin shook her head wearily and wondered if she should have a nap and try again with fresh eyes. She folded the notebook shut and sighed. Her eyes fell back to the map in front of her and she noticed the shape again. It wasn’t a doodle this time. It was a part of the printed document.

  Just as a realisation sunk in, her back arched and she drew a great whooping breath.

  Lucy jumped awake in fright and turned to her friend. Xin’s eyes were white and, if Lucy hadn’t known better, she would have said they glowed ethereally.

  “Is she having a fit?” Andy asked. His usually deep voice was an octave or so higher with shock.

  “I don’t know,” Lucy panicked. She let the blanket drop from her chest as she leaned over to clutch Xin’s shoulders. “Xin... Xin, can you hear me, honey?”

  “What’s going on? Pete asked from the driver’s seat. “Is she alright?”

  Xin remained rigid and unmoving, her breathing was shallow and ragged.

  She could see it, the shape. It was right in front of her. She yearned to reach out through the white haze and touch it. Before her eyes, it rotated and suddenly she was flying towards it, faster than she had ever travelled before. She began to panic as she recognised the sensation. She wasn’t flying, she was falling.

  As the shape got closer, Xin writhed, trying desperately to find a way to break her fall. Her muscles were locked into place and she knew that at any moment her body would explode against that grey mass. The five sided, pentagonal form that was growing larger each second.

  But then, it was gone. It disappeared entirely and was replaced by a towering grey concrete wall that stretched out into the haze for as far as Xin could see. The walls were tiled with a mosaic of uniform square windows. There were four rows of them and each was as black as night. For a moment, Xin couldn’t place what was wrong with the walls, but then the understanding dawned on her. There were no doors.

  The scene quickly changed again and Xin lurched right through the wall. She found herself in a cavernous hall with a sparkling white marble floor. The hall was empty but for ten enormous pillars that stretched from floor to ceiling along the two adjacent walls. In the centre of the hall, there was a large metal plate set into the floor. Once Xin had noticed it, she found that she was stood beside it. The plate was large enough that, had she been inclined to lay down on it with her arms stretched above her, her fingers and toes may just have touched both edges. It was silver and embossed with writing around its edge. She didn’t have time to read it before she dropped through it, but she was sure that in the centre had been a large eagle with one staring ruby eye.

  Xin fell through a crushing darkness and pain swelled in her head. Then the darkness was chased away by a blinding light. Her head felt like it might cleave in two before she ever hit the bottom. She was still unable to move and try as she might, she couldn’t force out the scream that was lodged in her throat.

  Abruptly, Xin jolted. She was sure that she had hit the ground and that any second her consciousness would leave her, but then she felt a wave of tension leave her body and sagged back against something soft. Voices filtered in shortly afterwards.

  “Her nose is bleeding, hand me that toilet roll.”

  She thought that the voice sounded familiar. She struggled to crack her eyes open enough, When she managed it, she could see Lucy reaching out to take something from Andy.

  “Lucy, you’ve got to tell me what’s happening back there.” Another voice drifted in.

  “Pete...” Xin murmured. Her lips felt thick and clumsy, they tingled as they moved.

  “Right, that’s it, I’m pulling over,” Pete said with certainty.

  Xin’s thoughts waded through the thick gloop that her brain had become, and reminded her that they mustn’t stop.

  “No,” She said, her voice stronger this time. “I’m fine.” She blinked a few time and struggled to sit up straighter. Lucy put a hand on her back to support her and held a wad of toilet paper out to her. Xin reached up to her face and felt a sticky wetness. Her fingers came away stained red.

  “Will somebody please tell me what’s going on?” Pete struggled to keep himself from yelling, but his raised voice woke Frank who was asleep next to him.

  “Don’ eat me!” Frank yelped in alarm. Pete turned to raise an eyebrow at him. Frank, remembering where he was, let out an embarrassed chuckle. “Sorry. What’d I miss?”

  “I don’t know, something happened to Xin,” Pete informed him. “Guys?” He enquired of the
other passengers.

  “Something happened to her?” Frank’s eyes widened. “You mean like, some E.T intervention? That kind of something?”

  “Come on, guys. Calm down,” Lucy chided. “Xin, do you know what happened?”

  “Yes,” Xin nodded slowly whilst she dabbed at her nose. “What happened is, I just found out where we’re going.”

  38.

  ‘Xin wouldn’t let us pull over, even though I wanted to. She made me keep driving even as she relived her experience for us. Her words were shadowed by an amazed silence. When she told us that we were heading for The Pentagon a weight settled in my stomach. None of us could guess what the situation would be like when we got there. There were optimistic suggestions that maybe the city was safe. With so much there to protect, we assumed that the military would have established a huge, pre-emptive presence there, and maybe they had held the city against the outbreak. So, we drove hard through the night to find out.’

  The first barricade the group hit was long since deserted. It was about a mile out from Arlington County. They had been weaving around a steady stream of abandoned vehicles for some time before they hit the remnants of the blockade. Twisting webs of wire fencing had collapsed but there were no bodies to indicate a struggle.

  “Do you think this means that they couldn’t keep it out?” Frank asked tentatively.

  “Who knows?” Xin said. “For all we know, they could have been too late. These barricades could have been unwittingly holding it in.”

  The sun was only just beginning to rise and by its light the next barricade, broken and unmanned like the last, became visible. It was eerily quiet and devoid of any sound or movement, but this time, all of the buildings in the vicinity were pocked with bullet holes. There were a number that bore the scorch marks of fire damage and others that were burnt to the ground. Upon close inspection, it was possible to see the traces of a fight. Old blood splatters and shell casings were the only hints. There were still no bodies to be seen.

  “This is really unsettling... Where is everyone? Why are there no bodies? Like, not even the animated ones,” Andy observed quietly.

  “Yeah, I never thought I’d actually want to see a zombie,” Frank agreed.

  “Could it be a good sign?” Lucy wondered. “What if they cleared the area and then fell back?”

  “If the area was clear, I’d expect someone to be holding the perimeter,” Pete told her. “Maybe they did have it under control but the attack came from within, like Xin said. The infection could have already been here.”

  When they hit the third barricade, it was still standing. Big chain link gates had been hastily erected, blocking the entire road. Scraps of material that had snagged on them flapped in the breeze. Parked on the other side of the gates was a huge military truck, bigger even than theirs.

  “Looks abandoned but I don’t think we’ll get through,” Pete sighed. “Even if we could, I doubt we could get much closer in this thing. The roads are going to be chaotic.”

  “We’re not that far away now. We can make it on foot,” Xin resolved.

  Frank groaned. “So it’s the end of the line for my baby then?” He patted his seat sorrowfully. “I’m going to miss her. What about all of our things?”

  Lucy rolled her eyes at him before casting her eyes over their salvaged supplies. “We’re going to have to leave a lot of this.”

  “Pack one of the bags with all of our medical supplies and water. we should be alright for food. The other bags can carry whatever weapons and ammo they will fit. We’ll take as many as we can carry and wear our armour,” Pete instructed as he pulled the Typhoon to a stop.

  Pete and Frank hopped over to join the others in the back of the truck. Lucy was tucking boxes and bottles into a canvas bag. Andy filled another with small guns and ammunition. Pete threw the strap of a machine gun across his chest and tucked a shotgun into his belt. His machete was already hanging against one hip. Frank had already filled the other bag. Xin stopped him as he started to zip it up. He held it open for her as she slipped her notebooks inside too.

  “Really?” She asked him, raising her eyebrow and picking out the small package of explosives he had included.

  “You never know,” Frank shrugged. “We’re gonna have to get in there somehow.”

  “Okay, everyone ready?” Pete asked.

  Andy threw the bag over his shoulder and handed Frank a rifle. “You should take this. You were pretty good with it before.” Frank accepted it from him and they both armed themselves with a couple more weapons.

  “Ladies?” Pete asked, eyeing their weapon choices and then nodding his satisfaction. He waited until Lucy had finished tugging on the last of her protective clothing before continuing. “Alright then, same as ever, keep your eyes open. Let’s go.”

  Pete leaned into the front and tripped the switch to lower the ramp. Frank gave the truck a final loving stroke and Pete quickly grabbed the bolt cutters he had left on his seat. Then they all filed out onto the street. It was silent and still outside, but there was a smell hanging in the air that none of them could place. Thick and heavy, it wasn’t just smoke. It brought to mind images of war torn lands.

  “C’mon, this way,” Pete led them up to the gates. “Give me a second,” he breathed as he positioned the cutters over a link in the chain that held the gates shut. Moments later the chain dropped to the ground and he eased the gate open just enough for them to squeeze through.

  Frank went first, followed by Andy. They waited for the girls to pass through and Pete brought up the rear. Surveying the street, the damage was overwhelming. Buildings that had once stood strong, had crumbled and smouldered like ruins.

  “Sheesh, what happened here?” Andy questioned aloud.

  “It looks like they got desperate,” Lucy said, looking around sadly. “They would have protected the area at all costs.”

  “We should keep moving,” Pete said with his hand at the hilt of his machete.

  The team made their way down the road. They passed storefronts with their windows blown out and picked carefully through the glass and debris. Blackened car wrecks lined the road and sheer destruction surrounded them, but still they encountered no zombies or human remains. It was like a ghost town.

  However, the next turn they came to, halted them in their tracks.

  “Oh, Christ,” Frank paled, turning away with his hand to his mouth.

  “Oh, that is grim!” Andy exclaimed, also turning away in disgust. Before them was a mountain of corpses. There was still smoke rising from the mound. It could have been burning for days. Suddenly the denseness of the air and the smell that came with it made sense. It smelt like death, masked by fire and smoke.

  “It may not be pretty, but it answers a few questions at least and I’d sure rather see them on that pile than staggering towards us.” Pete looked around at the others. “We don’t know how long that will be the case. Something obviously happened here, otherwise the military or whoever was defending the area would still be around.”

  “Wishful thinking here,” Frank began hopefully. “But what if they’re just holed up somewhere?”

  “There’s only one way to find out,” Xin said determinedly, starting forwards again.

  A short walk later, the friends found themselves emerging from the built up area and onto a main road. Across a stretch of grass, they could see sheets of metal, erected to form a protective wall. The wall was enclosing such a vast amount of space that it could only be their destination.

  “Heads up y’all,” Andy nodded. Following his gesture alerted them to the presence of a crowd. They were lingering around a break in the wall and spilling inside. The entrance was bordered by military vehicles and the figures milling around wore a variety of different types of combat gear. Pete noticed both camouflage uniforms and plain black swat attire.

  “Are they...?” Lucy asked cautiously. Frank had already raised his rifle, pointed it towards them and was peering through the scope.

  �
��Nope,” he answered firmly. “Definitely not fully alive.”

  “Are you sure?” Pete asked, already knowing the answer.

  “Never known a man walk around with half of his face missing as though nothing has happened. What about you?” Frank asked sarcastically, lowering the gun from his eye.

  “Alright, I get the picture.” Pete shook his head.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to look?” Frank raised his eyebrow and smirked, offering Pete the rifle. Pete batted it away and Frank snorted a laugh before raising it back to his eye.

  The silenced shots went relatively unnoticed. By the time any one of them realised what was happening, Frank already had a crosshair trained on them and took them out. Bodies crumpled one after the other, leaving them free to make their way closer to the fence.

  Xin took the lead, hopping over the guardrail onto the grass and jogging lightly as the others hurried after her. Pete sprinted to catch up to her.

  “You’re in a hurry,” He breathed, slowing to match her pace.

  “I’m ready to find out where all of this is leading us,” she said unwaveringly.

  “Me too,” he agreed with her. “And we will, but, maybe you could slow down and let the rest catch up?”

  Xin slowed down, looked around and flushed slightly. “Sorry.”

  “No worries,” Pete smiled, gazing quickly at her and then hurriedly looking back to survey their path. “Do you think we’re going to be able to get in easily?”

  “We can hope,” Xin said uncertainly. “The... vision? Well, whatever it was, it didn’t give me any idea how to get inside. Hopefully that’s because it will be obvious.”

  “Hopefully,” Pete agreed. “Let’s duck behind here and scope the place out.”

  Andy, Frank and Lucy caught up to them moments later, crouched behind a truck surveying the confines of the wall.

  “There’s... a lot of them,” Xin informed the others.

  “So what else is new?” Frank rolled his eyes. “What’s the plan, Stan?” He asked her.