Kyle calls me back a half an hour later, and the conversation does nothing to ease my mind.
“Hello, Abigail. I heard you called.”
I answer immediately, “Hi! I hope you are having fun with your family. Do you have any special plans for dinner tonight?”
There is a long pause.
“I actually have plans tonight. Is there anything else?”
“No,” I reply. “Enjoy your evening”.
I worry my way through dinner much to my parents’ concern. I think, however, they are secretly relieved, and my mom tells me how one of her best friend’s sons is moving to Michigan from Pennsylvania to go to medical school and that she hopes I will make him feel welcome and introduce him to my friends.
“You remember Norman Fisch,” she continues. “He’s moving into an apartment this week, and I invited him to spend New Year’s Eve with us. Maybe he can join you and your friends.” I nod but knowing that whatever my mother is trying to do is not going to detract me away from Kyle so easily.
After dinner the phone rings.
“Abigail. Do you have plans tonight? I am wondering if I can come over.”
It is Kyle, and my heart pounds. “Yes, please come over. My parents will be home and are looking forward to meeting you.” I give him directions to my house and then inform my parents of our plan.
Kyle rings the doorbell about an hour later. My dad answers the door and shakes his hand. They have a few moments of pleasant conversation. My dad took piano lessons as a child and, in fact, earned extra money growing up playing at a nearby nursing home. He also managed to teach himself how to play guitar. It turns out that Kyle used to play in high school and college and remembers some songs. It is a pleasure to watch him and my dad bonding over the guitar and playing favorite songs. I am happy that at least with my dad, things are going better than I ever hoped.
My mom seems a little bit more guarded and suspicious. When Kyle notices the pictures on our mantle of my parents at the Bar/Bat Mitzvah candle lightings of Alex, Kevin, and Jennifer Katz he remarks how nice it is being such good friends with his cousins. My mom replies sharply,
“Yes, we consider Ruth and Sherman Katz among our best friends!”
It’s almost as if she is warning him to be on his best behavior regarding me or Ruth and Sherman are going to hear about it. Or perhaps she is wishing that I found Alex more attractive as our families once hoped for. Kyle only responds politely,
“Well, you must be close to have all their children displayed like that.”
My parents eventually wander upstairs to their bedroom to give us privacy. We do a lot more kissing and cuddling and the sense of rightness feels so wonderful.
“I can hold you like this all night,” Kyle sighs.
I respond with another kiss which quickly intensifies.
“I like your dad very much,” he compliments. “I could have sat and played guitar with him all night. Your mother, on the other hand, is not going to come around so easily.”
I suspect he is right and it surprises me. Early on in the summer, it was my father who made all sorts of negative comments, but he was just being protective of his little girl growing up.
We continue to kiss and he finds a spot on my neck that absolutely drives me wild. I feel all hot, on fire, and tingle in places down below. I moan softly with pleasure.
“I think I found an erogenous zone,” he grins.
He finds my lips and kisses me passionately once more. He looks at me,
“We need to find you a young guy. You need someone who is more your own age.”
I sigh. “I have dated lots of young guys, and they bore me. I am happy where I am right now.”
He kisses me again and holds me tight, rubbing circles in the small of my back. We spend several hours just kissing and holding each other until he finally mentions that it’s late, and he needs to go home. He tells me that in the next few days he has to spend time with family but that we are still on for our Christmas night date. We share one last passionate kiss, and I watch by the door as he pulls out of our driveway.
Chapter 17 Christmas Date
As he had mentioned, Kyle did not call me for the next few days, and I respected his space to give him quality time with his family. I knew his sister Jane was in town, and I think he would want to visit her, his brother-in-law, and nephew as well as his brother’s two daughters and son. His parents are also still living as well. I did meet his mother once when we worked together over the summer before we went out on our date. He did mention that he told his mother about me and that she was happy he was dating somebody Jewish. I just hoped that it was family time that he really wanted and not time with Sarah to try to make things work.
I tried to keep busy and think on the two days we had together rather than worry about what might happen. I went over to friends’ houses and tried to enjoy game nights, watching movies, and going to local bars, but my mind was elsewhere, and I kept hoping Kyle would call with a free evening that he wanted to spend with me.
On Christmas Day in the afternoon he calls me as promised, and we make a time for him to pick me up. He made reservations at the Dragon House, an upper scale Chinese restaurant. I wash my hair and try to tame my curls the best that I can into a smooth style. I am satisfied with my new sweater that accentuates my curves and camel colored pants. I carefully apply my make-up, which I rarely wear, flatteringly so that my eyes and high cheekbones are accentuated.
He rings the doorbell, exchanges a few polite words with my parents, and we go on our date. Now that I think about it, this is only are second actual date. On the two times during this visit, we had only just “hung out” and the one over the summer was more of a casual meeting. Kyle was dressed up nicely, too, wearing a button down shirt, tie, and khakis.
He tries to order us wine with dinner for a festive mood but is informed by the waiter that alcoholic drinks are not served on Christmas Day. We have a good time without as conversation flows. I don’t complain that I wish I had seen him more this visit but mention how much fun I have been having spending time with friends.
After dinner, we decide to go back to his brother’s place as he, his sister-in-law, nieces, and nephew are out to dinner with his sister-in-law’s family. Whenever Kyle stays at his brother’s, he has a private area to himself in the basement with his own room. He has me lay down next to him on the bed. We kiss each other passionately, and he works his hand down my shirt. He figures out the latch on my bra, and he loosens his tie and takes off his shirt as well. We lay pressed together chest to chest and then he reaches down and gently caresses my breasts. His lips quickly follow on my neck as he finds my sensitive spot. I moan with pleasure. I am completely happy to be where I am at this moment. He leaves his pants on, but I can feel his erection. It is both thrilling and frightening to know I have this power over someone. His mouth moves down to my breasts as he suckles one nipple and then the other. I feel like I want to pull away, yet I want to continue. Before I can decide whether or not to proceed, we hear the garage door open. His brother and his family have returned home. We make ourselves presentable as quickly as we can and climb the stairs to greet his family.
Like the first time I met them, his family are polite and pleasant. Elizabeth, his sister-in-law, seems especially nice. She asks me about my plans for graduation as I help her in the kitchen with making coffee. She even tells me she may know of a few people I can contact with newspaper connections.
Back in their great room, I find that Kyle’s nieces and nephew have talked us into playing a rousing game of Monopoly. We are all laughing and having fun when the phone rings. The older niece answers.
“It’s Sarah,” she whispers.
Kyle takes the phone and walks into the kitchen for privacy. I try my best to make conversation with his brother, sister-in-law, and the children, but I am not succeeding very well. Shortly after he returns, he announces that he is getting tired and is going to take me home.
Instead of te
lling me what happened when he talked to Sarah, he puts in a mixed tape of a popular teen singer that his nieces loaned him. We both know the words and are holding hands and singing along. For now we will be happy with what we have together. He walks me to the door and kisses me passionately and embraces me for a long time against him. He lets me know that he would like for us to continue to call and write to each other, and I mention my grandmother in Florida.
“That would be nice. Let’s see what we can work out for your Spring Break. In the meantime, Happy New Year.”
He holds me tight and kisses me deeply one last time before he drives away.
Chapter 18: Motherly Love and Other Disasters
The rest of Winter Break is uneventful and predictable. I go out with friends who are still home. For New Year’s Eve, we decide to go to a festival in a downtown shopping area in Birmingham, one of the nearby upscale cities. They open up their community buildings to different music concerts, one act plays, and other festivities until it is time to countdown to midnight. I am stuck bringing along Norman, the son of my parents’ friend, who will be attending the winter semester of medical school.
Norman is very loud and opinionated about anything and everything. He keeps a strict diet year round of plain pasta and dry chicken. I am miserable to be stuck with him. My friends are trying to be polite, but I can tell that they feel the same way. Unfortunately, my parents invited him to stay in our guest bedroom until school starts, and he has offered to give me a ride up. My parents are going to have to come up with something a lot better for me to forget about Kyle. I touch my lips, happily knowing that Kyle was my last kiss of 1992.
The night before I am to leave for school, my mom insists that we need to talk.
“We need to talk about Kyle. I tried to have an open mind but now that I’ve met him, I think the whole thing stinks. He didn’t really make an effort to see you or take you out to any nice places. Why, when the Golden’s first got together Cindy was living here in Michigan, and Brian came almost every weekend from St. Louis to see her.”
I sigh. Here goes my mom being negative again because my life is not fitting in with her plans.
“Kyle is treating me just fine, and he did take me out to a really nice dinner on Christmas Eve.”
Mom gives me a look of annoyance and says, “The Dragon House is nothing special; he could have done a lot better and seen you a lot more.”
“Mom,” I raise my voice. “He was visiting from out of town. He had a lot of people to see and not a lot of time. The fact that he saw me as much as he did was nice.” (I try not to think of Sarah and how many times he managed to see her).
Mom just gives me that look she does when she disagrees but does not want to argue anymore.
“I am just glad I didn’t bring this up to Ruth and Sherman. There is really nothing for them to know.”
I realize that judging from the way they acted, at least dad is coming around. As for my mom, she has always been critical of my choices and a bit overprotective. Plus, she likes to one-up her friends and she probably feels Kyle’s gestures were not enough to brag about to the Katz’s and her other friends. I do not need fancy dinners and it is way too soon for passionate declarations of love.
The beginning of 1993 is a rough time for Leigh, Diana, and me. Diana is taking a shower and all of a sudden she announces that she has to go home for the weekend and asks if I can come with her. Her father picks us up, and she is strangely silent. Later that day, she calls me and asks if she can come over.
“I found a lump in my breast, and my father got me a late Friday appointment with my doctor.” Tears are running down her face. “He says he won’t be able to tell anything for sure until they do a biopsy. I’m staying home through at least Monday and a surgeon will operate.”
I’m in shock, so I just decide to listen. I give her a supportive pat on her hand, and she continues,
“I just can’t believe how Matt has been acting. Last night, all I wanted to do was for us to lie on my bed and cuddle. When he called the friends he had plans with to cancel, they all teased him about being whipped, and he didn’t correct them that we are dealing with a potentially serious problem.”
I give her a hug, worried about my friend’s health and surprised at Matt’s behavior. To be honest, though, I always thought he was a little bit whipped, always doing anything and everything for Diana. This time, however, I feel he was in the wrong and that she deserves better from her boyfriend, more sympathy and support. She continues,
“We have discussed this several times, and I always end up crying. I can totally see Matt and I married in a few years. I keep seeing how wonderful he would be as a father, but he says that he never wants to marry anyone. His parents are unhappy but, still, we have so much more than they do,” She blows her nose and continues. “I love him so much, and I can’t see being with anyone else, but it makes me sad knowing that someday I may have to. I don’t want to make that choice about Matt yet even knowing how he feels about marriage.” Diana has her biopsy, and Leigh and I wait anxiously by the phone in our apartment. Finally, the day after the biopsy, it rings. Leigh rushes to the phone. She listens and then gives a sigh of relief.
“Negative! She just has to stay home today to recover, and she will be back up here tomorrow.”
I’m so relieved for my friend. I think about what she had to say about her relationship with Matt and about no matter the future, she had to be what she could to him for now. This health scare of hers hit close to home: someone my age and a friend going through this. I think about what Kyle and I have and our time together.
January 20, 1993
Dear Kyle,
I have been thinking about our time together, and it was very nice being with you. I’ve made an important decision about us. I think that I am ready to take things to the next level with you. In other words, I am ready to have sex when the moment is right. I do insist on protection as I am almost 22 and do not want to get pregnant. If I ever did get pregnant, although I am pro-choice, I do not believe in abortion for myself. Also, if we are going to do this, I know that you would wear protection, but I also insist on an HIV test because you never know.
Now that the awkward stuff is out of the way, thank you for giving me the confidence to make this decision, and I am very glad that I met you and that my first time is going to be with you. I can’t imagine it with anybody else. I think you are one of the best things that has happened to me, and I can’t wait to see you over Spring Break.
You do know Spring Break is around my 22nd birthday. My father offered me his frequent flyer miles as a present, and I can’t imagine a better one. As the date gets closer, more details to come.
Love,
Abigail
I mail the letter off before I can really think things through. I do not know how long this is going to last between Kyle and me, but I think that I am falling for him and cannot wait for him to receive my letter. I wonder what he is going to say when he sees what I have to say.
After returning from the lobby mailbox, I see Leigh sitting on the couch in tears. Diana is comforting her.
“He was such a great guy,” she keeps saying over and over.
“What’s wrong?”
Leigh tells how Ted just called her and told her that they needed to break up. They had had a fight the weekend before. Ted had come up and all of a sudden, he left and Leigh quickly followed and let Diana and I know that she was going home. She came back later that night, however, with all sorts of promises of how she needs to change. Then today, he tells her that he thought it over and that things happened too fast, and they need to see other people. I always thought she latched on to her relationship with him so she wouldn’t have to deal with what she went through with Daniel.
Daniel is a burnout and has no plans to go to college. In fact, he does not think much about anything except cars and drag racing and has gotten in trouble with the law over it. He was driving on a suspended license. He and Leigh met two yea
rs ago when he saw her walking around the mall with her friends. He walked up to her and asked for her number. In the time that I knew Leigh and Daniel together, they were always in a fight about one thing or another, but they would always make up. Then one day last year while we were still in the dorms, Leigh came to my room and told me that Daniel hit her. I was surprised when a few weeks later they got back together. Then six months later, Daniel hit her again and a few weeks after that, she went to a party and met Ted and all of a sudden they were a couple. In truth, I’m not surprised about the breakup. I always thought Leigh’s expectations about Ted were too much too soon.
Diana and I comfort Leigh while she cries, and we just listen.
“This is the first time in years I am alone. I don’t think I have eve r been alone before,” she cries. “There has always been someone.”
I take this one as I have always been alone. I try to reassure her by saying, “Sometimes it is better to be alone. You learn so much of yourself. I know you, you will get through this.”
On Friday night, Diana and I decide that we need to celebrate her negative biopsy and to cheer Leigh up. We decide to go dancing at our favorite bar. We have a great night laughing and drinking a little bit too much. We are singing popular songs as we walk home.
The phone is ringing as we are opening the door. I pick it up.
“Hello Abigail!”
It is Kyle; obviously, he got my letter, and as I suspected he wants to talk more about my decision.
“So where have you been tonight?” His tone is very sarcastic.
I answer, “Out dancing with friends.”
“Well, I hope you didn’t do anything to get AIDS.”
I am shocked at his tone.
“Very funny, Kyle. What is going on?”
“Well, obviously I got your letter, and we need to talk. I do not think you are ready to have sex.”
A Relationship...Or Something Like It Page 6
