Tangled Dreams

by Jennifer Anderson

  “Alright. I promise tomorrow, I’ll be on time.”

  “Now that’s a deal. Sit down and eat your breakfast I saved for you. Then you can go up and make your room feel more like your own. I can help you if you would like.”

  “That won’t be necessary. I won’t be around long enough to fully enjoy it.”

  “Um, okay sweetie. Well, maybe we can do a few things just for the time being.”

  Not wanting to disappoint her, I agreed. Finishing my breakfast I went upstairs back to my room. I didn’t really have much to make it look, or feel, like my own room. I did put my makeup on top of the vanity and a few of my necklaces that daddy gave me as a little girl. Unpacking all of my clothes I put them in the dresser drawers and threw the suitcase in the closet. Needles to say it didn’t take very long. Just when I thought the silence would get the better of me, my room door flew open and Kayla and Kylie came running through it, into my arms. They were both dirty from head to toe, and adorable.

  “We missed you last night Madison.”

  “I’m sorry Kayla. I was so tired I fell asleep.”

  “That’s okay. We can show you Emily tonight.”

  “Emily?”

  “Our pony.”

  “Oh I would love that. Did you know that I have never petted a horse before?” Kylie and Kayla looking at each other in astonishment.

  “Your kidding?”

  “Nope. I’m happy that I finally get to though.” Putting an instant smile on their faces.

  “Okay, mommy said to come down for lunch. We have to go wash up first. Then they went running out the door as fast as they ran in.

  Descending down the stairs I could smell the aroma of some sort of casserole or meatloaf in the oven. In the kitchen Julia was getting everything prepared.

  “Can I help you take the food to the dining room?”

  “Well yes you may. Just right through that door.” Pointing to her left.

  Walking in, William was already seated at the head of the table. Kylie and Kayla had already come down and was taking their seats. I however, did not see Gavin anywhere. Walking back into the kitchen I spotted aunt Julia.

  “Aunt Julia where is Gavin?”

  “Well, sometimes he doesn’t come in for lunch. He will stay out in the barn and work.”

  I noticed she had tears in her eyes as she turned away. I knew why he really didn’t come in for lunch. He was obviously punishing his parents. Making me a little angry, you could see he was doing a good job of it. They loved him like a real son and that is just as precious. I never got that kind of love from my mother. But, on the other hand, I can’t put myself in his shoes and presume to know how he feels.

  Lunch went fast enough. No one really said much of anything. Tomorrow is Saturday and it was explained to me after lunch that is was just another work day. Sunday however, was their day of rest. Julia did all of her cooking on Saturdays so she didn’t have to work either. Everyone pretty much fends for themselves. However, this Sunday she told me that she was taking me into town with the twins to pick up some new clothes. After all of that discussion the twins showed me the rest of the house and took me out to the barn. She was a beautiful horse and quite friendly. Gavin kept trudging by staring at us while he worked and I just chose to ignore him.

  Hours went by and they showed me what chores they did, and it felt good to have the company. Afterwards, we finally went in for supper. It was a different meal, but the same procedure. We heard Gavin come in from the barn, but he went upstairs and never came back down. After supper, the twins went upstairs to their room to play with some dolls, and I helped Aunt Julia clear the table.

  “Madison dear. Could you take a plate up to Gavin? He hasn’t eaten all day, and has to be hungry.”

  “Julia are you alright?”

  “Yes honey. Well I guess I should probably inform you of what is going on.”

  “I’m sorry, but I already know. I over heard you and uncle William talking about it the other night when I came down for a shower.”

  “Oh. I’m so sorry you were subjected to that dear.”

  “It’s alright. I’m sorry you’re so upset.”

  “Oh, Madison. You are such a special girl. Worrying about me when you’ve been through so much.” Giving me a light kiss on the forehead.

  “Thank you Julia. I’ll take this up now.”

  “Thank you honey.” She turned around to the sink and let out a big sigh of relief. I imagine it was because she did not have to explain the situation to me.

  Going upstairs, I decided to just dump off his tray and get the heck out of there. He can spit his nastiness to someone else. I’m in no mood for it. I knocked on the door and impatiently walked in, tired of waiting.

  “Gavin, I have your food. Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I thought….well, never mind.” I stumbled awkwardly, unable to form a sentence.

  There he stood, with a pair of jeans on and nothing else. His chest was bare and still had water dripping down it from his wet hair. I definitely underestimated how built he really was. His muscles were well-defined, as well as his arms. His hair was all messed up and I realized for the first time that he had thick wavy hair.

  “Madison chill. I just got out of the shower. It’s no big deal.”

  I started to turn around embarrassed and absolutely mortified, when he grabbed me by the arm.

  “Madison, it’s no big deal. Can I have my food before you go running out though?”

  Looking down embarrassed, I realized that I was going to walk out without giving him his tray.

  “I’m sorry Gavin. Yes you can have your food.” I tried to ignore the fact he was half-naked and the tingling sensation and butterflies in my stomach when he touched me. I pulled away quickly and put his tray on his desk. When I turned around, he was smiling clearly amused by my embarrassment. I realized that I had never seen him smile before, and unfortunately it made him even more attractive.

  “What is it? Why are you smiling like that?”

  “Anyone ever told you how pretty you are when your nervous?”

  “No, and I don’t think it is very funny.” Really annoyed by this point.

  “Ah, lighten up.”

  “I will not lighten up. You have hardly said two words to me since I got here. And when you did, you have been very rude.” I was pleased to see that cocky smile wiped off of his face.

  “I’m sorry Madison. I shouldn’t have acted that way, and it was wrong of me.” Shocked that he actually apologized I felt like I had little choice but to forgive him.

  “Well alright. Whatever. It is over now. I’ll leave you to eat.” Walking towards the door I turned around to look at him again. “You know you should smile more, it suits you.” Then it was his turn to look nervous.

  Walking back into my bedroom I was shaking. I have had boys touch me before casually enough but I had never felt like that before. It felt like and electric current flowing through my body. I have to get that out of my mind, sitting on my bed to get my bearings. I’m not even staying that long. I just need to get along with everyone and not get attached. Although, I was pretty sure it was too late for the twins. I really would miss them.

  I had to of sat there at least an hour consumed in my thoughts. Thinking about how much I missed dad, how much my life has changed in a very short time since his passing. Looking at the clock it was barely eight-thirty and I was not tired at all. Making my mind up that I wanted to go outside to explore. Yearning to watch the sunset since I have arrived. Stopping briefly outside of Gavin’s door, I wondered what he was doing. Shaking my head I ran downstairs to get some fresh air. I need to get away by myself to think for a while.

  Gavin was toying with the idea of getting up to see where she was going after hearing her bedroom door shut. His curiosity further peaked when he faintly heard the front door open and close. Looking out his window, she was walking in the direction of the barn. God, what is she doing? She doesn’t know her way around a farm. She obviously isn’t t
hinking about the snakes and the coyotes that inhabit the tall grass and woods out there. Looking towards the direction of the sunset he knew it was going to be dark before long. Flopping back down on the bed, he figured it was her own problem.

  Walking through the tall pasture wasn’t an easy task, finally coming to a line of trees. Curious I stepped into the woods and started walking awhile watching the light through the trees throwing shadows everywhere. Coming onto a creek, I decided that this has to be the most beautiful place I had ever seen. Sitting beside the water I listened to the movement and it made me wonder if dad ever did the same thing when he was a kid. Losing myself in thought once more, I didn’t realize it was getting so dark. Standing up and brushing myself off, I realized it was a whole lot darker than I realized. Looking around and forgetting what general direction I came from, I picked the direction I thought the house was in. After walking a couple of minutes, panic started bubbling up inside of my stomach, turning in a full circle confused.

  “Oh my god. I forgot which way to go.” I shrieked not caring I was talking to myself.

  Gavin was starting to pace in his bedroom when he hadn’t heard her come back. Now that it was almost dark he knew she should be back inside.

  “Damn it Madison. You don’t know your way around a freaking farm.” He mumbled more out of annoyance, than worry at this point. Walking to his closet and throwing on a shirt he left his room to go look for her. Walking out toward the barn, he was a little surprised when he didn’t see her on the porch. Maybe she was in with the twin’s pony.

  Just when I thought it couldn’t get any darker it did. Trying to look through the trees I didn’t even see any light from the moon. The panic becoming more urgent as time flew of out my grasp. Trying desperately not to get more and more scared by the minute. Unfortunately, every minute that ticked by felt like an hour. Jumping at every sound around me. Walking slowly, trying to feel my way through the trees coyotes started howling around me in every direction. “What am I going to do?” Muttering to myself. Knowing I hadn’t told anyone that I was going outside, now relishing in my own stupidity. The realization hitting my like a ton of bricks, tears started streaming wildly down my face. Not liking the prospect of spending the night out here.

  Gavin walked back out of the barn perplexed, looking all around him as he stood in front of the doors. “Damn woman. Where the hell did you go?” He said out loud to himself. Not as much annoyed now, as he was worried.

  “Come on Maddie. Don’t get hysterical. Just calm down. I lived in the same apartment building with people who had done jail time for all sorts of horrible crimes. I can handle being lost in the country.

  Right as I thought that, something growled somewhere beside me.

  “Who am I kidding? No I can’t.” Turning in the opposite direction of the growl I started to run . It was now so dark, I couldn’t hardly see my hand in front of my face and in a few short steps, I tripped over what felt like a tree root and fell hard to the ground.

  “Oh no. What did I do?” The sharp searing pain was undeniable as I rocked back and forth holding my ankle in pain. Trying to convince myself that I was fine, and reason with my hysterical self, I started to rise again slowly. The intense pain shot through my ankle once again and the burning was horrible. Knowing I wasn’t going to get anywhere with my ankle the way it was I cursed my accident prone self, laying down on the ground. I knew I was now covered head to toe in dirt and mud and it was getting very chilly. I knew screaming would do me no good. Now feeling defeated and terrified.

  Gavin was searching all around the outside of the barn. I am going to be really pissed off if she is already up in her room. Chucking a stick into the darkness. I’m out here looking all over for her, and meanwhile I am losing sleep. Relieved when I find her but, mad as hell. Looking back up at the house her room was still dark, and he was starting to get discouraged. Just as he was thinking he might have no choice but to wake up his parents, he heard a faint sound like crying, realizing it was Madison. Feeling the panic bubbling up inside of him, he started towards the woods following the faint sound of the cries growing louder and louder. Coming up on the creek he spotted her not to far laying on the ground.

  “Madison, oh shit. Are you alright?” Running over to her, he knelt on the ground and lifted her up into a sitting position. Cupping her face in his hands. “Madison are you alright? Talk to me babe. Your shaking.”

  With tears streaming down my dirty face. I had never been so happy to see him. “I’m alright now. I think I might have sprained my ankle. Gavin I was so scared. I’m sorry. I just got lost in my thoughts and before I knew what was going on, it was dark and I was lost.”

  Pulling her in close he gave his best effort to comfort her. “Sh, it’s okay Madison. Everything is going to be okay. I’m here now, and I’ll get you home.”

  “I don’t know if I can walk Gavin. My ankle is pretty messed up.”

  “It’s okay. We are not far from the house.”

  Lifting me up effortlessly, he held me close while I sobbed on his chest feeling horrible. “I’m sorry Gavin. You shouldn’t have to carry me. Maybe I can walk.”

  “And have you fall again? No. I’ve carried heavier things, a lot farther distances. Don’t worry about me.” Then he was maneuvering his way through the brush and weeds and along the creek into the pasture like he had done it a million times before. Dread washing over me suddenly.

  “What is your mom and dad going to think when they see me? They are going to think I’m irresponsible.”

  “Don’t worry about them. We’ll figure something out. I’ll get you in unnoticed tonight. Then we’ll get you into the work shower down in the basement. They will never hear us. You can just tell them in the morning you slipped in the shower. They’ll never know the difference.

  “I don’t want you to lie for me.”

  “I wouldn’t be lying to them. You will be.” He said with a hint of a smirk.

  “Good point.”

  Stepping up on the porch quietly, with one hand he eased it open and slid us in carefully like he had done it a million times. He navigated us through the kitchen into the back hallway leading to the dining room. Opening the door, we were heading down basement steps and he wasn’t even breaking a sweat. Walking across the room he sat me down on a chair by the shower. The only thing besides the pain I could think about was how good he smelled. Kneeling down in front of me, he took my ankle in his hand and started taking off my shoes. Hypnotizing me with every gentle motion he made.

  “Gavin you don’t have to do that. Really. You have done enough already.”

  Looking up at me with those gorgeous eyes.

  “Madison I have to look at it. So just shut it.”

  “Alright, sorry.”

  “Madison, did anyone ever tell you that you apologize to much?” He asked smirking.

  Why is it every time he smiles I get butterflies in my stomach? “No, I can’t say anyone has ever told me that. I have been accused of being to quiet or gullible but, this is a first.”

  Looking at it, “Well it isn’t to bad. I’ve seen worse sprains. I’m no doctor but it’s probably a mild one. I’ll have to get some ice on it. But, first I guess you need a shower.” He said to me looking me up and down. Obviously noting that I was covered in dirt, like I had rolled around in it. “Do you need me to run up to your room to get you a change of clothes?”

  “Yes please. If you could. I need my nightgown on my bed.” Forcing myself to stop staring at him and try to form a sentence.

  “Alright. I’ll go get it.”

  Rising up off the chair to get ready I realized just how much I hurt. If that wasn’t enough, the side of my leg was throbbing where I fell down. Having enough humiliation for one day, I decided to keep that to myself. With the searing pain I sat quickly back down on the chair.

  With a look of concern on his face, “Madison, I’ll help you.”

  “No. I can do it myself.”

  “Yeah because you�
�re doing such a smooth job of handling yourself already. I”ll help you.” He said giving me no choice as he reached over me to turn on the shower and grabbed a towel “Here wrap this around yourself and unbutton your pants. Pull them down as much as you can. Try not to put any pressure on your ankle though.”

  With trembling hands I unbuttoned my pants and he came around to me and lifted me up off the chair far enough for me to get them past my thighs. Coming back around to my front he reached up the towel with both hands which automatically sent me jerking up in my seat. Making me cry out in pain as I put pressure on my ankle.

  Placing both of his hands on each side of my face as he looked up at me, “It’s okay Madison. I’m just going to finish pulling them over your ankle. I promise.” Nodding my head nervously with the go ahead.

  With gentleness I would have never dreamed he was capable of he gently put his hands up the towel and pulled my jeans over my thighs, and then over my ankles. I didn’t feel a thing except for the new burning in my stomach.

  “I’ll go throw these in the washer over there.” Pointing across the room. “I’ll turn around so you can get your shirt off.”

  When he turned around, I pulled my shirt off, quickly wrapping the towel back around me. Making sure that all my potentially embarrassing body parts were fully covered. Well as covered as they were going to get anyhow.

  “Alright here is my shirt.” Holding it out with a shaky hand. Not really sure if I was shaking over him, or from the events of the night. Walking over to me, he grabbed my shirt and quickly threw it in the washer.

  “Okay, I’m going to help you up and in the shower. You can then just hand me the towel when you get in and I’ll get you a fresh one. I’ll then run upstairs to get your night-gown.”

  “Alright. Thank you.”

  As soon as he touched me, my skin started tingling under his touch. I was pretty sure I would melt right here in his hands. He was so strong and perfect. I couldn’t think of someone who was more striking as him in every way. Grabbing me gently under my arms he helped me step up in the shower. I noticed as I pulled the curtain and he gave me my towel he was trying not to look at me.