“You could have packed up your things and left if that’s what you wanted to do,” Jane spat out. “If things were so bad for you, you could have run away with the first man who would have you. But you shouldn’t have taken that baby away from me. It was torture! Sheer torture!”
Jane sniffed, and in an obvious attempt to regain some of her dignity, she swiped at her tears with the back of one hand.
Despite the lies she’d told him, despite everything, Greg wanted to go to her, wanted to comfort her, but for some reason he didn’t. He couldn’t. So he simply stood, silent, rooted to the spot.
“You want to know why I took Joy?”
Pricilla seemed unaffected by Jane’s tearful diatribe.
“I took the kid away because I was mad at you. I was mad as hell that you manipulated me. You made me feel guilty. If it wasn’t for all the guilt you laid on my shoulders, I’d have never given birth to the kid. I’d have been as free as a bluebird in the treetops.” She switched her weight to the other hip. “But you forced me to endure that god-awful pregnancy—I’ll never forgive you for those horrible months I spent fat and miserable. I’ll never forget the awful pain of having that kid come out of me. And as if that hadn’t been enough, you then made me feel guilty about wanting to go out and have a little fun. ‘You’re a mother now,’ you said. ‘You have to stop partying and carousing,’ you said.”
Pricilla made a mockery of Jane with a squeaky, unflattering, holier-than-thou imitation.
“But I am free,” the woman continued, unrelenting. “I’m free of you. And I’m free of the kid. And leaving the both of you behind is—”
“The best thing you ever did,” Jane quietly concluded. “Yes, you’ve already said that.”
Silence seemed to echo off the living room walls. Then Pricilla glanced at Greg. She giggled suddenly, her eyes registering surprise.
“I’d forgotten you were here,” she told him. She heaved a sigh, and smoothed her palms down her silk-clad thighs. She looked at Jane again. “My, but I feel better. I went to the apartment today to tell you all this, but you weren’t there. When I went to the restaurant, Max told me you’d gotten a job with some doctor in Philadelphia.” Her cackle of laughter was sharp. “I about split my gut when I heard that. ‘There she goes again,’ I told myself, ‘manipulating her way into people’s lives.”’ Her blond head tilted to one side, her eyes taking on a wounded look. “I know you always cared more about the kid than you did about me.”
“Oh, Pricilla, that’s not true.”
“It is! And you and I both know why, too.”
Greg’s gaze cut sharply to Jane, who had pressed her lips together, guilt seeming to ooze off her in thick sheets. The whole scene was growing stranger by the moment.
Jane began, “Look—”
“No.” Pricilla cut her off by swiping her hand through the air. “I’ve said what I came to say. I’m ready to go. I have someone waiting for me.” Then she turned to Greg. “I also came to warn you about Jane. She’s manipulative. And she’s not above using guilt to get people to do exactly what she wants.” Squaring her shoulders and tipping up her chin, she admitted, “I lied about you. I’m sure she’s tattled on me. Revealed all the lies I told her about how you refused to help me with the kid.” Her mouth quirked up at one corner. “I’d like to say I’m sorry, but I really can’t. I was watching out for myself. It’s a tough job, but somebody’s gotta do it.”
Without another word and only the slightest of wobbles, Pricilla sauntered to the door. It took two tries for her to get it open, but then she was gone.
The dull ache swelling in Jane’s chest felt like it was surely going to suffocate her. She knew what it was. She’d lived with this dreadful feeling every single day since moving in with Greg and Joy.
It was fear.
Fear of being discovered.
But now the pain had grown. Metamorphosed into something new. Something gargantuan.
This unbearable lead balloon inflating inside her was the fear of Greg’s reaction now that he had discovered the truth about her identity.
Of course, he’d had to find out. However, this wasn’t how she meant for it to happen.
Her eyes darted to Greg. He stood there, seemingly frozen in place as he stared at the closed front door. His handsome features were devoid of emotion. But Jane knew that was only due to the shock he’d received. Soon the awful truth would sink in, his mind would assimilate all the information he’d learned from Pricilla’s visit. Then his muscles would thaw. And his feelings of anger and betrayal would soon be bubbling to the surface like molten lava.
Her fear warned her—urged her—to run. To flee before he had the chance to react. She realized that was only her natural-born instinct of fight or flight…and she didn’t believe she had any more fight left in her.
But running would be wrong. She’d told Greg stories. She’d lived under his roof allowing him to believe half truths and lies about who she was, where she’d come from, and she’d hidden from him her relationship with Joy.
“So that was the sister—”
The melting process had begun, and Jane felt her mouth go dry at the sound of Greg’s cold tone.
“—from whom I was waiting for a call.”
Jane didn’t answer. It was clear he wasn’t asking a question. So she only remained silent and stood there.
“That was the person who was going to give you a great reference. Pricilla was the person for whom you baby-sat. Joy was the baby you helped raise.”
He was putting the story together quickly. Guilt weighed so heavily on her, she could hardly keep eye contact with him. But she forced herself to hold her head up, her gaze level with his. Knowing what he was going through, the shock of the truth he was just now discovering, Jane felt he deserved an eye-to-eye connection.
“Lies,” he said. “It was all a bunch of lies. I can’t even count all the lies you told me.”
“They weren’t all lies, Greg,” she said quietly. “You’ve got to believe me.”
“Why? Why do I have to believe you? Why should I believe anything that comes out of your mouth?”
He was hurting. Oh, my, how he was hurting. She could clearly see that. His green eyes were hazed over with the pain he was experiencing.
“Please…” She’d never felt the need to plead so urgently as she did at this moment. “Please, Greg, let me explain.”
A war was being waged inside him. That was clear. Would he agree to listen to her story? Or would he walk away from her? Jane knew she’d have to live with the winner of the battle, knew she’d be forced to be content with whatever decision he ultimately came to.
It felt as though many long moments passed, even though she knew no more than ten seconds could have ticked away. Finally, he moved. He walked over to the couch and sat down.
“I’m listening.” Then he crossed his arms tightly over his chest and waited.
Hesitantly, she went and sat down in the chair adjacent to the couch. With nervous fingers, she reached up and absently scratched her chin, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, worried her earlobe, all the while pondering where to start her explanation.
“When I came to your office for the first time,” she began, “it wasn’t with the intention of lying about who I was. I came there—” Apprehension had her feeling the need to pause and swallow. “I came to you intending to ask you if you had seen Pricilla and Joy. You see, they had been gone a week. And I had no idea where they were.”
The agony and worry she had endured during that awful, lonely week made her eyes grow misty.
Inhaling a shaky breath, she continued, “B-but, if you think back, you’ll remember that you were late. I sat there in that examining room for a long time. Just thinking. Worrying. And wondering.”
He gave a light nod, and Jane knew he remembered the day and the fact that he had been running late.
“I hadn’t wanted to come see you at all,” Jane admitted. “Back when Pricilla first told me she
was pregnant, I advised her to contact you. To give you the opportunity to offer her some help.” She licked her lips and acknowledged, “Monetary help. You see, we needed it. Pricilla wasn’t working. Hadn’t ever worked, really. And on my wages as a waitress…”
She shook her head. “I’m not staying on track very well, am I? Anyway, Pricilla told me that she’d talked with you, and that you…weren’t very nice about the idea of a baby. That you refused to give any help at all unless you were given total custody. Pricilla suggested we agree, that we give you Joy, but—” again, Jane was forced to swallow “—but I just couldn’t let that happen.”
Jane didn’t feel the need to go into just how deeply she was against that idea, or why.
“She never came to me.”
His chilly tone frightened Jane. This wasn’t going well at all.
“I know that. I do know that. Now. But I didn’t know it then. While I was waiting to see you in your office that first day, I was frantic. And not thinking clearly. I had looked for Pricilla and Joy everywhere. I’d called and visited all her friends. No one had a clue where they might be. S-so in desperation, I ended up in your office.”
She rubbed her fingertips back and forth across her lips. “But at the last minute, I realized I might be making a mistake. I thought you might frown on the idea of Pricilla disappearing with Joy like that, with no job and no money, a-and that you might make some trouble for us. See a lawyer. Try to take Joy from us—from Pricilla, I mean.
“And just as I was about ready to leave the office, you arrived.” She moistened her dry lips. “So…I lied. About who I was and why I was there. And I’m sorry.”
Disapproval dulled his gaze.
“Please try to understand,” she pleaded. “I practically raised that baby for ten months. I love Joy. Like she was my own.”
Guilt rolled over her, and she hoped he didn’t suspect the full truth behind her desperation where Joy was concerned.
“I hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Joy for a week. I was in a panic. I was sick with worry. And when you said you had a little girl, my thoughts just went into total chaos. When you offered me a job as Joy’s nanny, I thought I’d died and gone straight to heaven.”
Hot tears scalded her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. “I wanted to see her so badly. I wanted to be with her.” She dashed away the single teardrop from high on her cheek. “So I let you believe that I was just a woman who was unemployed and down on her luck and in need of a job and a place to stay.”
Sucking in a quiet breath, she continued, “I quickly learned you’re nothing like the man my sister described you to be. I can’t believe how I’ve come to care about you. How I’ve come to—”
Careful, her brain hastened to warn. Now wasn’t the time to reveal her heart. In fact, at this moment Jane truly believed there would never be a time that she could reveal the full extent of her feelings for this man.
“The only thing I’m guilty of,” she said, “is not revealing to you that I’m Pricilla’s sister and Joy’s aunt. Everything else I ever said to you was the truth. The honest truth.”
He sat there, and Jane easily imagined him to be a powerful judge weighing the fate of her future.
She could hold back the all-important question no longer. “Are you going to kick me out, Greg? Are you going to keep Joy away from me? Please, I’m begging you. Please allow me to have some small part in that baby’s life. Please. I understand if you’re angry. If you’re disappointed and disillusioned. And feeling betrayed. You have the right to feel all of those things. And every bit of that is my fault. But, please…”
Her voice trailed into oblivion when he shook his head and stood up.
“I don’t know,” he said. “I don’t know what to think.”
Then he walked out of the room, leaving her sitting there all alone.
Chapter Ten
“I should have put two and two together weeks ago.” Greg paced the small conference room, making circles around the table where Sloan sat.
“But we’re in the medical profession, Greg,” his friend pointed out. “Two and two rarely if ever equal a concrete answer. There are too many variant factors.”
But Greg barely heard him. “How could she do this?”
Just then Travis shouldered his way into the room balancing three foam cups. “Got here as quick as I could. Stopped off for decaf coffee. So, Greg, which patient is in crisis? And what happened?” He looked down at the empty conference table. “Where are the patient’s files?”
Emergency meetings were rare in their practice. And before tonight, the gatherings had always been called to discuss a specific patient’s imminent distress. However, after having lain awake nearly two hours, emotions eating a damned hole in his stomach, Greg had called this meeting to address his own crisis.
He needed advice. He needed strong shoulders to lean on. He needed friends on whom he could safely vent. He’d called Sloan and Travis.
“It’s not a patient.” Sloan reached for his cup of coffee and popped off the lid.
“It’s Jane,” Greg said, raking his fingers through his hair.
Travis looked confused. “But we just left your place a couple hours ago. Everything was fine.”
Sloan inhaled steam rising from the coffee. “Seems Joy’s mother showed up after everyone left.”
Again, Travis’s dark brows gathered as he evidently searched his brain for some information. “What was her name? Patsy?”
“Pricilla,” Greg supplied.
“Yes. I remember now.” Travis smiled. “Well, isn’t that nice? Joy’s mother coming to visit on Thanksgiving.”
“From Greg’s description,” Sloan said, “it wasn’t so nice. The woman had been drinking.”
Greg corrected him, “The woman was sloshed out of her gourd.”
Travis whistled. “Did you let her see the baby?”
Dark, heavy thoughts weighed on Greg’s mind. “She didn’t come to see Joy. She came to see her sister.”
Travis just shook his head. “I’d better sit down. I have no clue what’s going on here.”
Quietly, Sloan explained, “Jane is Pricilla’s sister.”
Finally realizing just how tangled the ensnaring web of the situation was, Travis gave another low whistle. “Jane is Joy’s aunt. That means Jane lied—”
Sloan cut him off with a sharp look. Evidently, Greg’s friends didn’t want him getting any more upset than he already was. But it was too late. Greg didn’t think he could get any more upset than he was right at this moment.
“As I sat on the edge of my mattress tonight,” Greg said, “things came to me. Things I should have thought of weeks ago. You know, Jane’s story was off. The story she gave me that very first day back there in the examining room. She said she needed a physical for a job—a job she hadn’t even lined up yet. That’s not the normal sequence of events. A person gets a job first, they obtain physical forms from their new place of employment, and then they see a doctor. Not the other way around. Why didn’t I realize then that this was all a sham? I fell for her ploy, hook, line and sinker. She said she needed a job, and I opened up my home, my family, opened up my whole life to her.”
“Stop being so hard on yourself,” Travis said.
“You had a need of your own. A big need.” Sloan planted his elbows on the tabletop, then laced his fingers together. “You needed help with Joy. Badly, if you’ll remember correctly. Maybe it was that need that kept you blind and deaf to anything else but what you saw as the solution to your problem.”
Greg sighed. “That makes me sound pretty lame.”
“It makes you sound human,” Travis said.
The room was silent for a moment.
Then Greg said, “You know, she had a good reason behind the lie she told.”
Both his friends looked interested.
“Pricilla had lied to Jane about me,” he told them. “Jane thought of me as some sort of big, bad wolf. She’d been led to believe that I wanted
no part of Joy’s life unless I was given full custody. That I’d refused to help Pricilla and Joy with monetary or emotional support.”
He explained Jane’s position until a deeper understanding shone in both the men’s gazes.
“However,” Greg finally said, “even though she had what she felt was a good motivation, that doesn’t change the fact that she lied. And she continued the ruse, continued to keep me in the dark regarding her real identity, even after she found out that all the things Pricilla had said about me weren’t true.”
“She was probably scared to tell you the truth,” Sloan offered, “after she’d let it go on for so long.”
“She let it go on for so long,” Travis repeated his friend’s words, “that her feelings for you changed. They deepened. Developed into something much more intense than she expected. I saw it when we were all together for Thanksgiving.”
Sloan nodded. “And your feelings for her have developed into something pretty amazing, too. Don’t try to deny it, Greg. You know it’s true.”
Greg remained silent. Sloan was right. He couldn’t deny it.
“I’ve never seen you happier,” Sloan quietly continued. “Yes, part of that happiness is due to Joy’s arrival in your life. But it’s more than that. It’s Jane. She makes you feel good. Needed. She makes you feel…content. I’ve never seen you more settled, more satisfied than since you met Jane. She changed your life. You have to admit that.”
It was true, Greg realized. So very true.
“So it’s understandable that she couldn’t bring herself to reveal the truth,” Travis added. “The relationship you two shared was changing, growing, every single day.” He shrugged. “Not to mention her maternal-feelings for the baby.”
Something Pricilla had said to Jane came to Greg.
If it wasn’t for all the guilt you laid on my shoulders, I’d have never given birth to the kid.
“Oh, heaven help me,” he groaned.
Pricilla would have aborted his daughter! If it hadn’t been for Jane, Greg would never have experienced the delight of being Joy’s father.
The Nanny Proposal Page 13
