Dating Dr Notorious

by Donna McDonald

  “Did you ever try to date Regina?” Lauren asked. It was a friendly question and she already knew the answer. She just wanted to hear Jim’s version of it.

  “No,” Jim answered quickly. “I never asked Regina out, but she wouldn’t have dated me even if I had. I was her client before I became her friend. She helped me deal with some difficult situations in my life. Dr. Logan draws an ethical professional line very carefully between the client and herself.”

  Lauren’s heart leapt when Jim chose to tell her the truth. “Yes, I know all about her ethics. I was once Regina’s client too.”

  “Really? I hadn’t heard,” Jim said quietly, wondering why she had told him. “I knew Alexa was her client once. She and I had a couple friendly dinners several years ago. Alexa told me about her relationship to Regina. I guess Regina has turned several clients into friends.”

  “Only the three of us, as far as I know,” Lauren said. “Do you mind if I ask you a personal question? I confess it was my motive for suggesting the walk.”

  Jim nodded and bit his lip to keep from laughing. Lauren McCarthy was about as nice a woman as he’d ever met. It was almost laughable for her to have an ulterior motive about anything.

  Lauren took a deep breath and told herself to channel Regina’s bravery.

  “I just wondered—I mean—well, are you still interested in going out with me?” she asked finally, her question ending on a squeak.

  “Are you kidding? No, I can see you’re not.” Jim’s surprise was total, and he was unable to keep the shock from his reaction. “What’s changed, Lauren? I’m sure you’ve heard I’m a married man. While my marriage is not the standard kind of relationship, I still have no intention of divorcing my wife. Going out with me would be hell on your reputation. I know you don’t want that.”

  “I’m not sure what I want anymore,” Lauren told him. “Of course I heard you were married, but where’s your wife? No one I know has ever seen her—but I guess it doesn’t matter anyway. Look, Jim, I don’t want to really date you—not in the more traditional sense—I just want to get to know you better. I’d like for us to be friends.”

  Lauren smiled confidently at Jim, pleased with her matter-of-fact tone and her approach to establishing a safe relationship with someone both Alexa and Regina thought was good guy. Jim would be a pleasant companion, someone she might call now and again for dinner or a movie.

  Jim stopped walking, looking at Lauren with hands fisted tightly in his pockets.

  “Friends?” Jim said bitterly, his self-deprecating laughter echoing off the trees as the night absorbed his frustration. “Being friends with you would be very hard to do. No, scratch that. It would be impossible for me to be your friend, Lauren.”

  Lauren almost laughed at his emphatic tone and frustrated stance. It was a miracle the man didn’t just snap like a twig with the stress of holding his muscles so taut. Wanting to laugh, but afraid she would hurt his feelings, she put her hands on her hips, an action she’d seen both Alexa and Regina do when they were frustrated, but never had the urge to do herself until tonight. Jim was being way too melodramatic. He was acting more like Jenna and Seth than a grown man.

  “What do you mean we can’t be friends? I’m friends with a lot of people,” Lauren demanded. “I’m a good friend. I walk people’s dogs, take food when they’re sick, and do a lot of other things. People like being friends with me.”

  “That’s not what I meant. Let’s just say there are things about me that might make you not want to be my friend,” Jim told her, coming very close, and then bending even closer to whisper the rest in her ear. “Not only would we not be friends, once you knew these things about me, you and I could never go back to being just polite acquaintances again. It would be wise for us to leave things just as they are between us.”

  “Oh, please. Why so much drama? What could I possibly learn about you that could be so life altering?” Lauren joked, laughing up into Jim’s serious face.

  Jim pulled his hands from his pockets. She didn’t back up, he noticed, didn’t know she needed to run like hell. Jim gave her credit for standing her ground, though it was probably naïveté more than bravery.

  While Jim wasn’t the sinner everyone thought he was, he also for damn sure wasn’t the saint Lauren imagined him to be on the basis of one kind act.

  Lauren was laughing at him now only because she had no idea what he felt, especially about her. Jim was suddenly driven to correct her lack of understanding. He suddenly and very badly wanted Lauren McCarthy to know exactly how he felt.

  “Just remember Lauren, the reason I’m giving in to my urge to do this is because you laughed at me.” He put his hands on Lauren’s waist and pulled her surprised body flush against his as he held her gaze. They lined up better than any dream he’d ever had about it.

  Lauren started to protest what Jim was doing, but fell silent when he put his lips to her neck to kiss her there. She heard herself make some little sound of surprise, which turned into a whimper, against the heat of his mouth.

  “What are you doing?” she asked, her voice unsteady. Should she push him away, she wondered? She didn’t want to push him away.

  Jim groaned low in his throat at her innocent protest, biting her gently in his frustrated state, then set about sucking the place he’d bitten while he grew iron hard against her. He tightened his grip a little more, his hands deliriously happy to be on Lauren McCarthy at last. The woman’s body was amazingly hard and sleek beneath his hands.

  “Jim—,” Lauren began, only to be stopped by his voice.

  “Sssh—no talking,” Jim said, his voice raspy and abrupt. “I’m pretending I’m not going to hate myself for this later.”

  Little pleasure dots danced inside Lauren’s eyelids. She called his name again because she didn’t know what else to say. When she tilted her head to give him more access to her neck, her mouth instinctively seeking his, he pulled away.

  Jim groaned again, pressing his hips to hers, loathe to sever the connection between them. Her mouth was there, just there if he wanted. But he couldn’t—shouldn’t.

  Lauren felt her nipples grow hard and wondered if Jim even knew how much he was turning her on. He seemed almost oblivious to her presence.

  “Jim,” she whispered, “I don’t understand this.”

  When Jim finally released her neck, he dipped his head to her the top of her pink dress and inhaled the scent rising from her straining breasts.

  “Me neither. Do you know you smell like heaven?” Jim asked.

  Her breasts tingled in anticipation of his mouth hovering above them. She could feel his lungs expanding as he drew her scent in.

  “I make it myself,” Lauren whispered, suddenly dizzy with longing. “I make my own perfume. This one is called Desire.”

  Jim laughed harshly against Lauren’s chest, tightening his grip even more, resting his forehead against her breasts for just a moment, then he lifted his face to hers.

  “You should have just called it Lauren,” he told her.

  When she moaned deep in her throat, it broke something in him, and Jim finally let himself kiss her mouth. She tasted every bit as good as she looked. When her legs gave out and she fell against him in surrender, Jim just kept on kissing her.

  He held Lauren McCarthy like she was a life raft and he was a drowning man. Maybe he was, he thought. His breathing was ragged and his arms shaking when Jim finally managed to let her go.

  “I can never just be your friend,” Jim said to Lauren, staring at her mouth, wanting to kiss her again. “I’ve wanted you this much for a couple of years. I know I can’t have you, but even that doesn’t stop me from thinking about us together. Now it will be worse because I’ve had a taste. Don’t ask me to do platonic. I don’t have it in me.”

  Lauren stood in the dark of the garden with her body humming for the first time in years. Her sexuality, her sense of herself as a desirable woman, had started to die from the first moment she’d learned about her former
husband’s indiscretions.

  In less than five minutes, Jim had given her all that back.

  Despite Regina’s and Alexa’s teasing, Lauren wasn’t really a saint. She wasn’t even naïve—though she frequently let people assume it about her. It was just easier than fighting about her standards.

  And certainly she wasn’t the best judge of men, but she had learned many things from her constantly unfaithful ex-husband. She knew what guilt tasted like on man’s lips and there wasn’t an ounce of guilt in Jim’s kiss, only a loneliness matching her own. It made her want to know his secrets—all his secrets. Whatever the true story for Jim Gallagher, Lauren would bet her trust fund the man didn’t have a wife—or at least not in the biblical sense.

  “I’m free for lunch on Tuesday,” Lauren told him. “I want to get to know you.”

  “Lauren,” Jim said roughly, his voice breaking. “You don’t know what you’re asking.” And he couldn’t let himself believe what he was hearing.

  “I’m saying I want to get to know you,” Lauren said, “and then I’m probably going to want you to kiss me again.”

  In Jim’s eyes, Lauren saw the same intense longing Ben had for Regina, the same inexplicable, unexplainable urge to connect. She decided she wanted that connection with Jim—returned his interest more than he was expecting, and she wanted—really wanted to have what his look promised. Her interest suddenly explained her resistance to Jim, her utter disappointment to hear he belonged to someone else. Now that she’d had a taste of him, she simply refused to believe he belonged to anyone—unless it was to her.

  It was the most selfish, unreasonable thought she had ever allowed herself.

  “Lauren, we can’t—I can’t.” Jim took her hand and raised it to his lips, but his eyes fell to her neck. A flush covered his face. “I didn’t mean to—mark you,” he stammered, “I’m sorry. I wanted you for so long—I got carried away.”

  “Good. Do it again,” she demanded, not minding how needy or bold the words sounded. Regina would be proud of her. “Let’s see what else there is between us.”

  Jim stared into Lauren’s eyes and saw her desire for him. She should have looked untouchable in her perfect dress with her glossy hair and French manicure. Jim used to think Lauren was untouchable. Now she looked eager and willing, and if he kissed Lauren’s mouth again, Jim knew he’d drag her to the ground right where they stood and bury himself in her.

  So instead, he brought his lips to the other side of her neck up near her ear, kissing and sucking a place just out of sight.

  “You’re not what people think you are,” he whispered, his tongue laving a trail for his lips.

  “Neither are you,” she argued.

  Her breasts pushed restlessly against him the whole time, and Jim sighed in pleasure. It had been so very long since anyone had truly wanted him, and he couldn’t stop himself from being a selfish bastard for a few more moments.

  “I’m afraid of your mouth,” Jim whispered the truth against her neck. “I don’t know how much I can stand without taking this farther than either of us can handle tonight. It’s been a really, really long time since I felt like this.”

  “Me too,” Lauren whispered back.

  When Jim removed his lips from her neck this time, he held her for comfort only, stroking her back and kissing her hair. When he was mostly under control, Jim took Lauren’s arm and started walking back with her.

  By the time they got back to the dance floor, Jim needed to leave and said so.

  “What about Tuesday?” Lauren asked, reluctantly turning loose of his hand.

  “We’ll see,” Jim said quietly. He had no intention of contacting her at all. He planned to tuck tonight away, remembering only the promise it held.

  It would have to be enough.

  There were promises you could break, and those you had to keep. No one knew that better than he did. He was keeping one he had no choice about and he had no intention of breaking it.

  Lauren deserved more out of life than Jim could ever offer her.

  *** *** ***

  Alexa and Regina walked over to Lauren as she stood in the doorway watching Jim leave.

  Alexa slipped an arm around her shoulders. “Nice to see you enjoying yourself for once,” she said, all teasing gone.

  Regina slipped an arm around Lauren’s waist stretching up to whisper in her ear. “Don’t look now, but you have a love bite on your neck.”

  Lauren nodded. “I know,” she said, sighing.

  Both women laughed and hugged her.

  “Actually, I have two,” Lauren told them. “Jim put the other one in a place it wouldn’t show.”

  “Naturally, we’ll expect a full accounting next Thursday,” Alexa told her.

  “Absolutely,” Lauren agreed, having no intention of sharing anything about it. “I think I’m having lunch with him on Tuesday.”

  “I don’t know if that’s going to happen. Looked like Jim was running pretty fast when he left,” Regina told Lauren. “You may have to chase that golden goose if you truly want it.”

  Lauren patted Regina’s hand and smiled. “Jim informed me that he couldn’t be my friend, then kissed me like there hadn’t been anyone before me and wouldn’t be anyone after. I’m convinced now he’s not what he seems. Now I want to know the truth.”

  “I wish I could tell you his story, but I can’t,” Regina told her regretfully.

  “No worries,” Lauren said, patting Regina’s arm. “Keep your ethics, Dr. Logan. I think I’m going to enjoy finding out for myself.”

  “Good for you,” Regina told her. “I can tell you Jim’s totally worth it.”

  “No kidding. The man is rusty but still had some really good moves,” Lauren said teasingly, smiling at the women she admired. “You two may have to teach me how to flirt though. I said some really stupid things tonight. My face was probably red the whole time I talked with him.”

  “You’ll be fine,” Regina assured her. “It’s like riding a bike. You don’t forget, but you wobble a bit when you first start riding again.”

  “So what do you think?” Lauren asked Alexa, knowing she had dated Jim.

  “I think I throw a hell of great party,” Alexa bragged, hugging Lauren tightly. “Even Saint McCarthy got a hicky out of it.”

  For the first time since she’d known them, Lauren fervently wished she could be even half as notorious as either of her outrageous friends. It would make what she intended to do so much easier.

  Chapter 16

  Alexa and Casey’s engagement party Saturday night had been fun, but exhausting.

  Now it was a perfect, lazy Sunday afternoon in Ben’s condo, the kind only good for naps and watching TV. Since neither of them liked TV much, Ben was napping on the couch with his feet tucked in Regina’s lap as she was reading one of the thriller novels she liked. She had told him there was nothing better than murder and mayhem to clear the cobwebs out of her brain.

  Ben opened his eyes to see Regina intensely reading while she absently rubbed one of his feet. He was as love struck with Regina as he had ever been with anyone in his life. He closed his eyes and sighed heavily.

  “Damn it, Regina. I want to do this with you for the rest of my life.” Ben opened his eyes again as the book hit his feet on its way down from her face.

  “How can you appear to be sleeping when your mind is churning? Why are you angry?” Then fully processing what Ben had said, Regina lightly smacked the bottom of the foot she was rubbing. “That wasn’t exactly the polished marriage proposal I expected from a man like you.”

  “That declaration of frustration was definitely not a marriage proposal. It was more like the beginning of a heated discussion, maybe even a fight.” Ben swung his feet out of her lap. “I’m getting tired of the problems between us being created by people other than us. I want to fight with you over the way the toilet paper is hung, not over someone writing fiction about us in the newspaper.”

  “Personally, I’ve always thought t
oilet paper should roll from the top,” Regina said easily, trying to sound reasonable while struggling not to laugh. Even as she joked, she linked her fingers with Ben’s to offer her agreement with the rest of his statement.

  Ben looked at her twinkling eyes and sighed again. Regina’s keen sense of humor was just one of the many things he enjoyed about her. “See? I think toilet paper should roll from the top, too. Why is it so hard for us to be together then?”

  Ben stood to pace in front of her with his hands in his pockets.

  Regina wanted nothing more at the moment than to find a way to make Ben feel better. “Well, I don’t think people who read celebrity gossip magazines care whether you and I agree on the issue of hanging toilet paper,” she offered logically, finally giving in to laughter at the ridiculousness of the conversation.

  “Well, they should,” Ben said, irritated, giving in to the laughter himself and coming back to sit close to her. “It’s hundreds of little things like hanging toilet paper that make a relationship good or bad for the long haul.”

  Regina smiled at how intuitively right Ben was, probably from having successfully navigated a long-term relationship himself.

  “I agree with you completely, Benjamin. Good relationships are made from the hundreds of little agreements between people,” Regina said.

  She hooked her arm through his and laid her head on his shoulder. He kissed her forehead and put his chin in her hair.

  “I’m going to figure this publicity thing out for us, Regina. There has to be a way for us to be together that doesn’t harm the people we care about. Do you believe I can solve our problem?” he asked.

  When Regina raised her face to his, Ben saw fear and doubt, but also hope. He was sad that not a lot of people had come through for Regina in her life. It made him more determined to be one person who did.

  Regina put an arm around Ben’s shoulders and hugged. “I believe you love me enough to try, which is more than I ever thought I would have with a man. I know it’s my job causing the problems for us. I’m happy for every day you don’t run away from our problems or me.”