Wrecked by the Bad Boy: The Sick MC

by Olivia Stephens

That didn’t surprise me at all, but here was no place for a snarky retort. I began to wonder just how many layers of pain this girl hid under all that anger and drama.

  “He still kept cooking, even though I said awful, awful things.” Her gaze turned skyward as if talking to her ex-lover herself. “I never realized I was going to lose him one day. Never thought that I would lose the opportunity to fix the mistakes I’d made.”

  “Asa.” I think Zane’s voice surprised all three of us. “He loved you. You didn’t need to make things right with him.”

  “But I should have.” Her eyes were cold as they turned back to us. I don’t know why I expected tears from her. I bet she could summon them up in an instant if it served her purposes, but I doubt she ever cried beyond that.

  “I’ve made so many mistakes in my life. So many. And I need to start atoning for them.” She smirked. “Do you like that word? Atone? It’s one I learned here. Atonement. Atoning. It’s my bread and fucking butter now.”

  It was time for me to speak up again. Or try to, at least. “Asa, you don’t need to atone for anything right now,” I said. “For now you should just focus on getting better.”

  She nodded, sighing. “Yeah, that’s what the doctors said. Basically those exact words. But I figured I can start small and work from there.”

  I hoped she didn’t consider us on the small side of the atonement spectrum, but by the look on her face she did. I supposed she wasn’t ready yet to understand the full implications of her actions. I didn’t blame her for it. She had probably been stewing about Graham’s death, under all that facade, since the very day he died. It would take her some time to come to terms with what she did to us, with what she had tried to do. She tried to end my life and tried to chain up Zane for his.

  “Well I think that’s good,” I said.

  She shot me a warning glare, reminding me that she didn’t need my approval. I had to laugh.

  “I will say,” she admitted, “I’d never felt as listened to before as I did when you were being my fake doctor.”

  I gave a genuine smile. If I had even the smallest part to play in her recovery, I was happy with it. “You deserve someone to listen to you.”

  “And now I’ve got a whole hospital of staff,” she said, extending her arms in an uncharacteristically jubilant expression. “They’ll be tired of listening to me before long.”

  “Is there anything else you want to say to me now, while I’m here?” I glanced at Zane. “To us?”

  She was fighting an internal battle, judging by her face. I watched the muscles furrow and jolt over her jaw, her forehead, her cheeks. She wanted to say something, but she didn’t. Maybe she just wasn’t ready. But we were ready, whatever it was. I was ready.

  “I guess I should probably tell you guys that the pregnancy was fake,” she said eventually, each word seeming more painful to her than the last. “I made it up.”

  Zane was gracious about her admittance. “Thank you for coming clean,” he said.

  I stayed silent. This was their business now. And maybe if they forgot I was in the room, Asa would reveal a little more.

  She was still looking out the window, too uncomfortable to meet either of our gazes. Zane didn’t try to urge her. I think he was trying the same tactic as me. Eventually, Asa huffed a sigh and said, “Everything got so fucked after Graham died. I was so screwed up and scared, and I thought nobody would ever love me again.” She looked down at her hands, the chipped red nail polish flaking away under her trembling, picking fingers. “Zane, you were the most stable guy I knew. You really have your shit together. And I thought with our history, it would be easy to get you to stay with me once you knew I was pregnant.”

  Except he hadn’t believed it for a second. It might not have been a bad plan, with anyone else. Well, it was a horrible plan no matter who she had tried it out on. But it might have worked. That was the scary part.

  “I understand,” Zane said, even though I wasn’t sure he ever really would. “I’m still very sorry for your loss.”

  A tear began to snake down Asa’s cheek. She wiped it away with the back of her hand like it was dirt on her skin. “I want to get better. It’s going to take a lot of work, but I can’t live like this.”

  Those were the best words I had ever heard her say. I wanted her to be better too. So did Zane, if he could get past all his rage toward her for hurting me. He hadn’t explicitly said he wanted to throttle her, but I had a feeling it was what went through his head most of the time now.

  “I think you will get better if you try,” Zane said. He reached out a hand as if to place it on top of hers, but halted halfway. I gave him a reassuring nod, and he got the rest of the way.

  Asa didn’t look at us the rest of the time in her room, and we left pretty quickly when the silence began to lengthen. I had a feeling that girl needed a good cry, and I didn’t think she would be able to stop herself from killing us if we bore witness to it.

  The walk back to the parking lot was solemn. Neither of us was sad, but I think we were both very pensive. I was thinking about how much I truly hadn’t known about Asa, and how sad I was for her. I didn’t know what Zane was thinking about, but it kept him very quiet.

  I kicked a stone across the parking lot once we’d reached the outdoors, watching it skitter across the ground toward Zane’s bike. It was hot outside, but there was just the faintest bit of breeze that tumbled through my hair and lifted it away from my sweating head.

  “I have something I want to ask you,” Zane said, stopping with a hand on my arm. “Something that I wanted to ask you back in Rayne, before everything got crazy.”

  He dropped onto his knee in front of me, right on the pavement in front of the doors, and my hands flew to my gaping mouth. “Zane!” I cried. “You can’t be serious!”

  His devilish grin was my only answer until he pulled the small, velvet box from his pocket and opened it in offering to me. I nearly squealed, my heart beating a wicked tattoo on the back of my ribs.

  “I am dead serious,” Zane said. “Life is too short, and I already know with my entire being that I will love you to the end of my days.” He pulled the ring from the box and raised it up toward me. The only thing that was missing was my finger inside of it. “Sasha, I’ve loved you from the moment I set eyes on you in that little flower shop. You’re everything to me. I need you with me always.” He smiled. “Marry me?”

  I laughed, giddy with excitement. “I never pictured being proposed to on the steps of an asylum,” I said. “Talk about crazy.”

  Zane chuckled. “Nobody ever accused me of not being crazy. Is that a yes?”

  “Of course that’s a yes!” I practically shrieked. “A million times yes, Zane!”

  I stretched my hand out to receive the ring. It was a perfect fit.

  He rose back to his feet and took me in his arms, spinning me around as I giggled like a maniac. My brain was wiped clean of everything except pure, undiluted joy. I was going to be Zane’s forever, and he was going to be mine.

  “Now, I thought we could go to the hospital to see your mom. Tell her the news,” he said. “But there’s something I have to do first.”

  “Can I come?” I asked brightly.

  He shook his head, and I pouted. “You’re going to leave your fiancée alone on the day of your engagement?”

  He laughed, pulling me tighter against his chest. “It won’t take me long. But I’ll give you something to chew on while I wait.”

  I raised a brow, skeptical. His word choice had my mind going elsewhere…

  “Not like that, you pervert,” he chided. “But kind of related to that.” He looked almost nervous, backing away from me and taking my hand. “I want to get the vasectomy reversed. I want to get out of this life, out of New Orleans, and start something new with you, Sasha.”

  My legs turned to gelatin beneath me. It was a wonder I kept standing. “Are you serious?”

  The thought of getting Zane without getting all the other shit
that currently went with him—danger, deceit, crazy ex-girlfriends—was like a dream come true. I loved Zane, but I didn’t love everything about his life the way it currently was. But that was all going to change.

  “Again,” he said, mirth evident in his tone. “Dead serious.”

  “And you’re not just doing this for me? I don’t want you to do this just for me!”

  He shook his head, drawing me close to him again. “I’ve always wanted a different life. I wanted a family, somewhere quiet. Away from all the club shit that’s been dogging me since high school. And I’ve never wanted it more than I want it now, with you.”

  The prickling of tears in the corners of my eyes made me bury my face in his chest. There were still obstacles to overcome; my mom’s surgery and the problem of getting into a doctoral program without a reference, to begin with. But I felt that I could do anything with Zane. We had already overcome so much together. Who knew which adventure would come next?

  CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT

  Sasha

  I asked Zane to drop me off at the hospital, instead of at home; while he went to do whatever errands he had to run. I promised him that I’d wait for him to get there before I told my mom about our engagement, though, which was going to take more self-restraint than I likely had. I told my mom everything; how was I supposed to keep from telling her the best thing that had ever happened to me in my entire life?

  For once, the sterile smell of the hospital, and the unearthly quiet of the cancer ward, didn’t send me into a spin of panic. It was something I’d never admitted to my mom. Or to anyone, come to think of it. I was terrified of hospitals. I had a visceral reaction each time I was in one, ranging anywhere from a bit of nausea to a full on panic attack. It wasn’t the hospital’s fault that my mom was sick, but being in them got worse and worse the more times she went.

  Today was fine. I could have skipped all the way to her room, except that would have been highly inappropriate considering both my age and surroundings. I held back to a bouncy walk instead, smiling at the nurses I passed in the hall. Most of them looked too worn out to return my grin, but a couple reciprocated.

  Mom’s room was still filled with flowers. They perfumed the air, making me forget that this was a hospital room in the first place. It seemed like a luxury hotel, and I imagined that my mom was a Broadway star who’d just done a brilliant performance. Some mysterious fan had sent dozens of roses to her, and we had puzzled over the mystery of who he was for many hours. This fantasy would have been necessary to me before, a way to keep myself grounded when all I wanted to do was cry and retch. But now it was just a sweet fantasy, one that I didn’t exactly need.

  “You’re looking awfully cheerful,” Mom commented from the bed.

  I strolled over to her, leaning down to embrace her. She smelled more sterile than I would have preferred. I’d never figured out at what point exactly she started to smell more like the hospital than herself. That was going to be one of my games, at one point, but it had seemed too sad. Hopefully, I would never find out the answer.

  “I’ve had a good day is all. And why shouldn’t I?” I pulled over the chair next to her bed until it was near where her upper body was propped against the pillows. “We’ve got the money to get you better. That’s all I want in the world.”

  It was true. If I had to choose between my mom and Zane, I would choose her every time. But I didn’t have to choose—I got both. Which made me impossibly happy.

  “Well, when you put it like that,” she said, returning my smile. It didn’t reach her eyes, though. I could only imagine the thoughts whirling around her head. I’d never been as sick as she had before. I’d never experienced the horror of watching your life slowly drain away. Sitting by had been no party, but my experience had only afforded me the tiniest of views into what her life must have been like.

  “What’s wrong, Mom?”

  She sighed, reaching for my hand. Hers were cool and soft, as they always were. At least that hadn’t changed. “I’m just worried,” she said. “Suddenly having the money to get this lifesaving surgery...it just seems too good to be true, you know?”

  I furrowed my brow. “Do you think Zane’s lying?”

  She shook her head. “No! No, nothing like that. All I mean is that I’ve been fighting this for so long. The thought of it being over—really being over—seems so far from my grasp that I don’t even know what it feels like. I don’t know how to be happy about this.”

  My heart sank. She was losing hope. I had worried this might happen if she got sick again, especially if it was as serious as it was this time. “Mom, it’s going to work. You’re going to get better.”

  She squeezed my hand, giving me a reassuring smile that was almost condescending. “I want to believe that. I guess we just have to wait and see how the surgery goes.”

  “I guess so,” I agreed. “But I truly believe things are going to work out for us. They have to.”

  I wanted so badly to tell her about my news. If she knew, it would definitely raise her spirits. But I promised Zane I would wait. I realized, then, that my mom didn’t know very much about Zane. Or about what we’d been through together. I’d been so caught up in her hospitalization that I hadn’t even updated her on Asa.

  “Zane’s ex-girlfriend committed herself to a mental health facility,” I blurted.

  If the abrupt change of topic startled her, she didn’t show it. “That’s good news.” She gave my hand another squeeze. “You must be thrilled!”

  I snorted and gave her a flat look. “Mom! A woman is having a breakdown. Of course I’m not thrilled.”

  She sighed and sat back further against the pillows. “Of course. I don’t know where all your empathy came from. Certainly not from me.” There was a mischievous glint in her eye. “Though my mom was a bit of an empath. She used to cry anytime she saw someone else cry. It was quite off-putting.”

  I gave my mom an extra-light smack on the arm. “Poor Grams. She’d be so upset to hear you talking about her like that.”

  Mom laughed. “Yeah, she’d probably cry about it.”

  I couldn’t help the smile that crept up my face. “I’m not as bad as Grams, Mom. I just understand people a bit better than most.” I shrugged. “Certainly not going to cry over Asa.”

  “Good. Cause that girl was a bitch.”

  “Mom!”

  We descended into fits of laughter and spent the next hour in a similar fashion. We exchanged funny stories; me about Zane’s club, and Mom about the other people in the hospital. One of the doctors, she said, was exceptionally good looking. She called him Doctor Danger because he had a motorcycle. It made me laugh, considering the kind of dangers I had been through with Zane over the past few days. If she knew the full extent of them, I doubted she would think danger was so amusing.

  Zane showed up just as we were giggling about a flirty comment Mom had made to Doctor Danger that had made him blush. At first, neither of us even realized Zane was there. I hadn’t been so absorbed in a conversation with my mom in weeks, maybe months. I wondered if it had been because of me that we hadn’t been like this. I supposed I’d been so stressed out with my degree and my thesis that I must have neglected her. I remembered Asa’s regrets with Graham, and I vowed not to let any of those seep into my life. I would have no regrets if anything ever did happen to my mom. But it wouldn’t be for a long, long time.

  “You two look like you’re having a fun time, “ Zane said, sliding up behind me. His hands reached out to massage my shoulders. If this was what married life was like, I could get used to it.

  “Just having girl chats,” Mom said.

  The look of weariness from earlier had passed from her face. Who knew all it took was a little girl chat? I wondered how she would look after we told her the big news.

  “Congrats on the big win. I’m not sure I got to tell you properly earlier.”

  He squeezed my shoulders, and I was sure he was smiling. “Thank you. I’m just happy that I can
help get you better.”

  I opened my mouth to begin to gush about the news, but Zane thrust a piece of paper in front of my face before I could. I was amazed that I’d held off from saying anything for so long. Now, telling my mom about the wedding was the last thing on my mind.

  “What is it?” she asked.

  I grasped the paper between shaky hands and craned my neck to look back at Zane. His sapphire eyes seemed lit from the back, both from mischief and from happiness. I looked back at my mom, blinking.

  “You know Edward, my advisor?” I asked.

  “The creepy one?” she asked.

  I choked on a laugh. “One and the same.”

  “What about him?” She looked concerned. I considered skipping to the end of the story to spare her the emotional rollercoaster, but it seemed to me that the story deserved to be told. Zane deserved the story to be told.