Rebel Rockstar

by Marci Fawn

  I turn to Lola and Tonya. “Do you guys want to come and stay at my place? We could do this together. Then we don’t have to be alone when we…speak to our families and stuff.” I’m more thinking about Lola for this one, but maybe I should do the right thing and call my mom too.

  “That would be amazing,” they both say happily. I can’t believe I’m about to have a sleepover with Lola and Tonya, after everything we’ve been through and under these circumstances, but then again, what seems a little weird is also very normal now too.

  We go over everything that we’ve been sent a million times until we have it right. As we rehearse, also deciding on our own information that we intend to include too, I feel so grateful that the girls are here. If I had to go through this night alone, I would have driven myself insane by now. Especially since I haven’t heard a word from Nate since I texted him with the good news. I don’t even know if he knows yet, or if he’s coming back.

  “Okay,” Lola finally announces when we decide that we’re done. “I’m going to go and call Ben and my parents. I have to tell them now.”

  “We’re right here.” I grin at her. “Just shout if you need us.” As she leaves the room with her phone gripped tightly between her fingers, I turn to face Tonya. “Are you going to call your family?”

  “No.” She shakes her head. “They already know. I told them years ago. When the news breaks, they won’t be shocked.” I stare at her, confused. I didn’t know she’d told anyone. “They didn’t believe me,” she admits. “Because I’ve always been a bit of an attention-seeker, they assumed I was making it up.”

  “Oh, my God, that’s awful,” I mutter, completely and utterly stunned. I can’t imagine how brave she was, just to be shot down by the people who were supposed to protect her.

  “I only brought it up once, but that’s what made me so scared to mention it to anyone else.” She tries to smile, but the strain is obvious in her face. “Hopefully this will make them see things differently, although, to be honest, from the way my family is, I doubt anyone will ever mention it again.”

  “I’m sorry, Tonya.” I hug her tightly. “That’s awful.”

  “It did affect me for a very long time, but I feel better now. It’s done, anyway.” She pulls back to look at me. “Why don’t you call your mom?”

  I stand in my bedroom alone, holding my phone nervously between my fingers. My breaths are coming out loud and labored at the prospect of the conversation that I now need to have. I keep thinking about the bravery we’ve all shown today. This should be the easy part, but deep down I know that isn’t true.

  “Come on, Jem,” I whisper to myself. “Just do it.”

  But by the time I work up the courage to actually follow through with it, the phone rings and rings, and no one picks up.

  As we stand outside the room where the press conference is being held, I don’t know who’s more nervous. We’ve all been a damn wreck since we woke up, and now I’m just desperate for this to be over.

  “Do people know that he’s been arrested yet?” Lola asks for the hundredth time.

  “I don’t know. I assume so.” I try to smile at her reassuringly, but it’s very difficult for me to disguise my own emotions. “I’m sure the world will be aware before we go out there—”

  “Come on.” Kim’s sharp voice interrupts me. “It’s time. Let’s go.”

  Anxiety courses through my veins as I see all the expectant faces looking up at me. Just as I really start to teeter on the edge of panic, Tonya grips my hand, and I shoot her a thankful smile. I’m not alone in this. Not anymore. The three of us can get through this. Together we have a strength that can tackle anything. This is going to be the easy part.

  We burst from the room, all over the moon to have it done. Surprisingly, everyone was really supportive of us, giving us exactly the reaction that we needed. Tonya pulls me and Lola into a massive hug and we all lose ourselves in the moment, grateful to have one another to lean on.

  “We did it,” she whispers excitedly. “We really did it.”

  “Jem!” A male voice calls above the crowd, and my heart flutters in excitement. I spin around to find Nate standing there, smiling widely at me, running towards me. “Oh, my God, Jem.”

  He lifts me up and kisses me intently, making me feel closer to him than I ever have before. This is the reason I haven’t been able to get ahold of him. He raced back to me at the very first opportunity to give me this amazing surprise.

  “Nate, I’ve missed you so much!” I cry out. “Where have you been?”

  “I’ve just done an interview.” He blows over my question completely. “I’ve got my side of the story across. Everything is going to be all right.”

  He runs over to Lola and Tonya, enveloping them in hugs too, and I listen as he says his words of thanks—especially to Lola, who he knows has risked her own reputation for his again—and I can’t help but smile. Everything feels right with the world again.

  “Come on!” Nate turns to us all and grins widely. “Let’s go out for dinner—my treat. I think we all have a lot of catching up to do.”

  Lola bites her lip anxiously. “Can I…invite Ben?” She looks to Nate. I know he hasn’t met Ben yet, but he wants to, so I know he’s going to say yes before he nods himself.

  “Of course!” he replies happily. “The more the merrier tonight. It wouldn’t be a celebration without him.”

  32

  Nate

  At dinner, I tell the girls and Ben about what I’ve been organizing—a charity event to raise money for abuse victims. I feel like it’s the perfect way for us all to get some closure on the horrible events that have plagued us recently, plus it’ll give us all the opportunity to give something back. It gives us a way to get back to our careers, too, and to think about the future.

  I don’t mention that Jem’s mom has been helping me with everything—that’s a surprise that I intend to leave for the night as a treat for Jem—but I’m glad she’s been there. Not only has she been extremely helpful and useful in all of her ideas, but it’s also given her some of the spark that I’m sure she used to have before she lost her husband. It’s given her a purpose, a way to help her daughter, and that’s exactly what she needed. She’s currently staying in a hotel nearby, waiting for the occasion to reveal herself. I know she’s very excited about that, and I can’t wait either.

  Luckily, all the girls can’t wait to perform at the party, just like I assumed they would, so that’s very exciting too. I’ve got some of the biggest names on board already, so it’s promising to be a really good night—one that I hope will raise a whole lot of money.

  As they scatter off to the bathroom, giggling in the way that girls do, I turn to face Ben, who has so far given me a very good impression of himself.

  “So, Ben.” I turn on the stern tone, giving him a smile so he knows I’m not too serious. “How are things going with Lola?”

  “Really well.” He grins. “She’s literally the love of my life, and I’m so glad to have her back.” He’s mooning, excited to discuss her. “Look.” He turns to face me. “I know you’re really protective of Lola, especially after everything that’s happened, but you should know that I would never do anything to hurt her. She really is the girl I love most in the world, and I wouldn’t do anything to wreck that.”

  “I know,” I reply kindly. “I can tell you love her, and she’s in love with you too. I’ve never seen her so happy.”

  He tugs a box out of his pocket and gives me a glimpse of the diamond inside. “I’m going to propose,” he whispers quickly. “Tomorrow night. I’ve got this whole amazing plan. She doesn’t know about it yet. I think she’ll be really surprised.”

  “Oh wow!” I gasp in amazement. “That’s amazing news.” My heart races with the excitement of it all, but before I can say more the girls return and we have to keep our mouths zipped shut.

  By the time the party comes around, I’m stressed out to high hell, but also very excited. All the acts
are ready, prepared for an amazing night, and I can’t wait to see it all unfold. But on top of that, I’m also eager for Jem to see her mother again, to see what I’ve done for her. She’s very excited too, and can’t wait to see her daughter, and I’m hopeful that the reunion will be a happy one, one that leads to a more positive future.

  But before that happens, Lola bursts into the concert hall, squealing with excitement. “Ben proposed!” she screams at me, flashing her ring in my direction. “We’re getting married. He asked me the other day in the most romantic way possible!” She flings her arms around me in excitement as Ben walks in slowly behind her. His face is filled with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen, but he’s much calmer in his approach. “Where’s Jem? I need to tell her. I want to tell her all the details about it!”

  “She’s backstage.” I point her in the right direction. “You need to get back there anyway to get ready yourself!”

  “Ooh, I can’t wait,” she pants. “This will be the first time Ben sees me singing live. It’s gonna be awesome.” She races away, leaving us both behind.

  “Come on, Ben.” I grab him by the arm, not wanting to feel like a spare part. “Come and give me a hand.”

  Ben helps me with the heavy lifting, giving me an opportunity to get to know him a little better. He really does seem like a sweet, genuine guy who will do anything for Lola. He has dreams of being a writer, which is great news for their relationship because it means that they’ll always be able to travel together. If anyone can make this work, it’s them.

  Just before the concert is going to start, Jem races to my side, squealing excitedly. “Oh, my God, Nate. You’ll never guess what happened!” I shake my head, a million possibilities floating through my mind. I’ve been so focused on this concert and everything that could go wrong that all I can picture is acts getting sick and pulling out. “It’s Tonya.”

  “Is she okay?” I panic, instantly wondering how I’m going to fill her slot.

  “She’s fine, look.” She points toward Tonya, who is happily chatting with, and possibly flirting with, a guy I don’t recognize. “That’s Simon, my cousin.” Jem grins at me. “I invited him tonight because he moved here recently, but I never thought he’d come. I…I just—” she can barely get her words out. She’s that excited. “I introduced him to Tonya and there were fireworks right away!”

  “What do you mean?” I laugh, wondering if Jem is finding meaning where there isn’t any. She might want Tonya to find someone so she isn’t the only one who’s single. But the more I watch her with Simon, the more I can see that Jem is right. There really is something there, something huge.

  “Trust me, they will be together before the night is over.” She giggles excitedly. “They are meant to be. I can just feel it in my bones.”

  “Are you happy with that?” I ask, just wanting to check that everything is fine. I’m sure it will be, but I know that girls are complex and sometimes when family is involved, it can get very difficult.

  “Very. I would love for them to be together.” She nods decidedly. “Simon is a really good guy, and very level-headed. I think he would be the perfect partner for Tonya—she needs someone like that. And the chemistry between them is electric!”

  I lay a small kiss on her nose. “Right. Come on, then, my little matchmaker. Let’s get ready. You still need to rehearse.”

  “I’ll be fine,” she insists, grinning happily at me. “I know exactly what I’m doing. I’ve been rehearsing for days.” She’s been very excited about this concert ever since I mentioned it. She couldn’t believe that I would be so thoughtful, that I would even think about doing it, so she really has been practicing every single day, trying to get her gig right.

  “You’re going to be amazing.” I smile. “The crowd is going to love your new stuff.” She’s actually been writing new songs just for tonight, and I can’t wait for the world to get to hear them. Especially since her mom’s going to be in the crowd, too. She intends to slip into the audience to see her daughter perform, but she isn’t going to be seen until afterwards, when we’re just partying—just in case Jem does freak out. I’m sure she won’t, but I have to be prepared for any outcome.

  “Thanks, babe. Right. I’m going to get ready—at least there’s no cat suit this time!” We both laugh, remembering that time on the cruise, when we were just finding our way back together.

  “That seems like a million years ago now.” She smiles dreamily. “Anyway, see you in a bit.” Then she races away.

  33

  Jem

  As I step down from the stage, I feel unbelievably exhilarated. That went absolutely amazingly, and I’m over the moon about it—and so glad that I’ve been given the chance to give something to such a good cause. Luckily Nate is there to greet me, because I almost collapse into his arms, my legs giving way at the mere sight of him.

  “Oh, my God, Jem. That was amazing,” he cries out excitedly. “You did such a good job. They loved your new stuff!”

  “Thank you!” I smile up at him. “I’m so happy.” He gives me a look, one that I can’t quite decipher. “Are you okay, Nate?” I ask, feeling a little panicked. “What’s going on?”

  “I have…I have another surprise for you.” He sounds way too anxious for this to be something normal, which makes my heart rate kick up a notch. After all the awful things that we’ve been through recently, I can’t stop my brain from instantly thinking a million and one terrible things.

  But then he steps aside, and my mother moves out from behind him. At that moment, my heart leaps into my throat, while my body freezes in utter shock. This is a woman that I’m not sure I expected to ever see again. We’ve drifted so far apart that I wasn’t sure we would ever be able to find our way back.

  “Mom?” I gasp, trying to process what I’m seeing. Is it really her? Am I somehow dreaming? I reach forward, touching her, proving to myself that I’m not imagining things. There’s a smile on her face but an anxiety in her eyes, which shows me that she’s just as freaked out about this meeting as I am, and that’s despite the fact that she clearly knew it was going to happen. “Are you okay? How are you here?”

  “I went to see her,” Nate admits, blindsiding me. “While I was away. When I went into hiding, I decided to do something productive with my time. I knew you wanted to see your mom again, and I was sure that you were too proud and too scared to make the first step. I hope…I hope you don’t mind.”

  “I did call you,” I tell her. “Before all of the stuff about the abuse went public. I didn’t want you to hear it first in the papers.”

  “Nate told me.” She holds my cheeks in her hands, staring sadly at me. “I’m so sorry that you had to go through all of that alone. I should have been there, and I let your dad’s illness take me away from everything else.”

  “It’s okay, Mom,” I say, really meaning it. “You had to be with dad. I totally understand that. And it wouldn’t have made any difference anyway.”

  “I don’t deserve your forgiveness,” she replies. “But I’m so glad that I have it. You’re so strong, and so brave. Nothing like me. You get that from your dad.”

  My heart melts at her words, and I think about the man that we both loved so much. I pull her in for a hug, washing all of the past away. I’ve been doing a whole lot of putting things behind me recently, starting fresh, and I certainly want to extend that to my mom. I’m sure she was depressed when she lost her husband, and I wasn’t exactly there for her either. We’ve both done wrong, but that no longer matters. If I can put this behind me, and really start a new mother-and-daughter bond with her, then all the pieces of my life will have truly fallen into place.

  “Let’s just start again, Mom,” I say to her. “Let’s just completely start over and forget everything from the past. I don’t want to dredge it up and go over it a million times. Let’s put it behind us.”

  “Are you sure?” She looks completely stunned. “I’m sure that I have a lot to answer for…”

 
“No.” I shake my head emphatically. “You have nothing. I just want you in my life again.”

  She bites her lip and looks at Nate, who nods happily at her. His expression is one of sheer joy at the sight of his well-thought-out plan coming together. “Nate has been helping me look at houses here,” she says a little coyly. “I thought if you wanted to see me again, to really have me around, then I might just sell the cottage and come and live closer to you, so we can really be a family.”

  “What?” I grip my chest in shock. “You’d sell the family home?” There was a time that she wouldn’t even go outside. Now she’s talking about uprooting her entire life for me.

  “It only holds sad memories for me now anyway,” she answers honestly. “I feel like I really need a fresh start with my life, to get out of the dark hole that I’ve been living in for the majority of my life. There couldn’t be a better time than this.”

  “I would love that, oh, my God, Mom. I can’t believe any of this.” As I pull her in for another hug, tears roll down my cheeks. How did Nate think to do this? What made him decide to take such a massive step—especially when he had no idea how I was going to react? As I gaze into his eyes over my mom’s shoulders, I feel a rush of love like no other. Who would have known that the damn cruise ship would have changed my life forever? Not only did it bring him back to me, it also gave me two of the best friends I could have ever asked for, it caused me to put the past behind me, and it finally helped my family make the first step towards repairing itself.

  “Did you see me sing, Mom?” She used to watch me all the time when I was younger, but of course that was just another thing that had to be stopped when dad got sick. He needed her, and she had to be there for him.

  “Darling, you were absolutely phenomenal.” She pulls back to look at me. “I’m so proud of you and your success. And the woman that you’ve become.”