The Sheriff’s Proposal

by Karen Rose Smith

  Not hearing him, she clutched her shoulder and moaned. She was shaking all over.

  Quickly he slipped his arm around her. “C’mon, sweetheart, wake up. Meg. Wake up.”

  Her eyes fluttered open.

  Logan stroked her tears away. “It was a bad dream. You’re awake now.”

  Recognition dawned in her eyes.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  She shook her head, and her lower lip quivered. “Would you just hold me?”

  Wrapping his arms around her, he settled her against his chest. After they’d made love, they’d fallen asleep in each other’s arms. With Meg tucked against his shoulder, Logan had fallen asleep easily. But holding her then and holding her now were two different things. She trembled against him, but not from desire. The kidnapping still haunted her. Suddenly he realized her decision to return to work might be something she had to do for her emotional survival.

  A week later, Meg glanced at the darkening sky, hoping the expedition Logan had planned wasn’t a mistake. The hiking trail wove through wooded terrain like a thin ribbon. As the incline became steeper, it was only wide enough for one person at a time. Meg glanced at the sky again. The day had started out sunny. They’d been hiking about an hour when the sun had disappeared behind a cloud.

  Logan trudged along first. Meg followed, with Travis bringing up the rear. He’d been sullen throughout the morning, and Meg wondered if Logan had bribed him to come today. Maybe she could get father and son talking to one another when they ate lunch.

  Stopping for a moment, Meg looked over her shoulder. Travis hiked about twenty feet behind her. “Are you getting hungry?”

  He gave her a very slight smile. “I’m always hungry.”

  At least he talked to her in more than monosyllabic sentences. Maybe if she could keep him talking… “I packed liverwurst.”

  “You what?”

  She grinned. “Just kidding. Ham and cheese and turkey and cheese.”

  They trekked on in silence a few more minutes. Suddenly she sensed he was right behind her.

  “I talked to Mr. Holden about the exchange program.”

  She moved to the side to make room for him on the trail. “And?”

  “He said if I keep my grades up, it’s a possibility second semester next year.”

  She clapped him on the shoulder. “That’s terrific.”

  “I was wondering…” He seemed hesitant to continue.

  “What were you wondering?”

  “Well, this is my third year of Spanish. But like you said, school learning’s not the same as actually speaking it with someone. I wondered if while you’re in Willow Valley, you and me could practice. If you have some spare time. I heard you telling Dad about working at the adoption service. If you’re too busy, I understand.”

  “For now I’m only working there in the mornings. I want to make sure Aunt Lily doesn’t overdo. But if you want to stop by after school a couple of days a week, that would be fine.”

  “You mean it?”

  She saw the doubts in Travis’s eyes. “Yes, I mean it.”

  “Because of Dad?”

  Travis was trying so hard to assert his independence. She understood what he was asking her. She laid her hand on his arm. “Your dad and I are seeing each other now. You know that, right?”

  “Yeah. I knew Dad was going to Washington with you.”

  “No matter what does or doesn’t happen with me and your dad, you and I can still be friends. Got it?”

  He grinned, a real full-fledged grin. “Got it. Is Monday afternoon okay?”

  “Monday’s fine.”

  The path narrowed even more, and Travis dropped back again.

  A short while later, Logan stopped before a sharp rise and waited for Meg to catch up. “How are you doing?”

  They’d managed little time alone since the past weekend. Wednesday night, they’d stolen an hour away in Lily and Ned’s barn. Afterward, laughing, they’d brushed the hay from each other’s hair. Remembering, she smiled. “I’m fine.”

  He offered her water from the bottle hanging on his belt. After popping the lid, he held the water out to her. When she took it from him, his fingers purposefully slid over hers, telling her he wanted to touch her more. She took a few swallows and handed it back to him. He sipped from the spot her lips had touched.

  Meg wondered if the bond growing between her and Logan was making matters worse instead of better for him and his son as Travis came up to them and frowned.

  Logan reattached the bottle to his belt. “Once we climb this hill, we can stop and eat.”

  Travis shrugged. “Whatever. I just want to get back. I have plans to meet Kyle at the Pizza Shop for supper.”

  Meg could tell Logan was counting to ten. As Travis started off in front of them, he said, “No progress so far.”

  “The day’s only half-over,” she soothed.

  He slid his hand under her hair and stroked her neck. “Always an optimist.”

  Closing her eyes, she relished the feel of his fingers and wondered why she loved his touch so. Maybe because she loved him. She was getting used to the idea…slowly.

  By the time they’d finished lunch, Meg felt like tearing her hair out strand by strand. Travis met Logan’s attempts at conversation, as well as hers, with brooding silence. She was about ready to take Travis by his ears and shake him, and she realized this was probably how frustrated Logan felt on a daily basis.

  When they took to the trail again, she guessed all three of them had a common goal—get the day over with. As they hiked up a steeper, rocky incline, her mind sorted through all the possibilities of things she could say to get through to Travis. Thinking about taking him aside for a heart-to-heart when they returned, she wasn’t as careful as she should have been on the path. She lost her footing.

  One minute she was upright; the next she’d let out a yelp and was sliding down the packed earth on her bottom.

  Travis got to her first and slid his arm around her shoulders to help her sit up. “Take a deep breath if you can. You probably got the wind knocked out of you.”

  Logan appeared by her side seconds later and snapped, “Don’t move her until I find out if she’s all right.” He took her hand and gentled his voice. “Does anything hurt?”

  Travis’s arm was still supporting her shoulders, but it was rigid with tension.

  She sat up on her own, moved her arms and legs and took a few breaths. Her right forearm was sore, and she realized she’d scrapped it on the slide downward. “I’m fine. Tomorrow might be a different story.”

  Logan directed, “Bend your arms and legs.”

  She did, and winced when she bent her arm.

  “Let’s take a look.” He unbuttoned her cuff and rolled up her sleeve. She’d scraped the skin.

  Travis shifted his backpack from his shoulders. “I have a first-aid kit.” Quickly he found it and opened it. After taking out a small plastic bottle of peroxide, he unscrewed the lid.

  Logan took a cotton patch from the little box and took the peroxide from Travis. “I’ll do it.”

  Travis slapped the box on the ground. “Fine. You do it. Like you do everything!”

  “Travis. Watch your mouth.”

  “What are you going to do if I don’t? Oh, I know. Send me to military school. Well, that couldn’t be any worse than living with you. You don’t want me there, any more than you want me here today. Anybody can see you two’d rather be in bed together.”

  “You apologize to Meg. Now.” Logan’s expression was so fierce, Meg was afraid he’d slap his son.

  “Do I have to apologize to you, too? What for? Telling the truth?”

  The two males stared each other down until Meg couldn’t stand it anymore. “Will you two please talk to each other?” When only silence met her question, she asked the teenager, “Why do you think your dad doesn’t want you around?”

  Travis pushed himself to his feet. “He just doesn’t. I know it.” He looked at
the hill and said, “I’ll meet you at the top.”

  After he scrambled off, Meg said to Logan, “Go after him. Talk to him.”

  “He won’t listen to me, Meg.”

  “You’re not listening to each other!”

  Thunder rumbled, and they both looked up at the darkening sky. Logan poured peroxide onto the cotton patch. “Let’s get you fixed up and home. If you soak in a hot tub tonight, you might not feel so sore tomorrow.”

  Meg was ready to bop both MacDonald males over the head with something heavy. They were more alike than they knew.

  Lightning flashed, and drops of rain began to fall. Logan had been keeping a sharp eye on Meg as Travis led their trek. She seemed fine, but he wanted to make sure she wasn’t hiding an injury so he wouldn’t worry.

  The rain fell in earnest, and Logan called to his son, “Travis, hold up.”

  Logan untied his jacket from around his waist. When he caught up to Meg, he put it around her shoulders. “This will keep you drier than your sweater.”

  “Travis, I said hold up,” Logan repeated as his son kept walking.

  Travis called over his shoulder, “The only way we’re going to get back is to keep going.”

  Logan ran up ahead and caught his son by his arm. “I said stop.”

  “I don’t want to stop. I told you I have plans.”

  “I’m not going to let us get soaking wet because you have plans. There’s a lean-to around the next bend. We’ll wait it out there.”

  Lightning shot through the sky, and the blast of thunder followed.

  A few minutes later, the three of them sat on the floor of the lean-to while the rain came down steadily on the roof. Travis had wound his arms around his long legs and rested his chin on his knees.

  Logan wished he could get through to him. He wished… “What are you and Kyle going to do tonight?”

  “Nothing illegal,” Travis answered sarcastically.

  “When I ask a civil question, I expect a civil answer.”

  Travis lifted his head and stretched out his legs. “I’m not a suspect, Dad. So leave me alone.”

  Anger and pain beat in Logan’s chest. “I will not leave you alone. You’re my son!”

  “And you wish I wasn’t.”

  Travis’s statement hit Logan between the eyes. “What?”

  “You heard me,” Travis mumbled, looking at his sneakers.

  “Where did you get an idea like that?” Logan asked, wishing he could read his son’s mind.

  “From you.”

  Logan reached out and grabbed Travis’s arm. “You can’t believe that. What did I ever do or say to make you think it?”

  Travis hesitated a second, then murmured, “Plenty.”

  He tried to pull away, but Logan wouldn’t let him. “Tell me, Travis. Tell me what’s going on with you. I’ve asked you before, and now I want the truth. Why did you run away?”

  “Your rules and regulations, curfews—”

  Smoke and mirrors—the same thing he thought they’d been fighting about for four years. “The truth, Travis.”

  Travis wrenched away, and his green eyes smacked into Logan’s. “All right. You want the truth. I’ll tell you the truth. You never loved Mom. And you never wanted me. I heard you fighting that night. I’d come home from a game and was standing on the deck. If you didn’t love her, you shouldn’t have married her! You shouldn’t have had me!” With that, Travis jumped up and ran from the lean-to into the pouring rain.

  Logan put his hand on Meg’s knee. “I have to go after him.”

  She nodded. “Of course you do. Go.”

  Logan found Travis running along the path. He clasped his son’s elbow. “You’re wrong. I have always wanted you. I married your mother because of you.”

  “You shouldn’t have. Not if you didn’t love her. The two of you should have just gotten rid of me.”

  “No!” Logan shouted to Travis and the world as rain dripped from his face. “I didn’t love your mother as I should have. But I was committed to her, committed to you, committed to our life as a family. My mistake was trying to convince your mother to want the same things I did.”

  “What things?” Travis clenched his hands at his sides.

  Logan had always tried to protect his son. Maybe it was time to stop. “More children, for one. I thought when we moved to Willow Valley, we could revitalize our marriage. I thought we’d try to have more children. But your mom and I didn’t agree. We argued about it that night and she ran out. Don’t you think I blame myself for her death as much as you blame me?” The guilt and anguish Logan had felt over Shelley’s accident poured over him with the rain.

  The question hung between him and his son as the drops pelted down.

  “You do blame me, don’t you?” he pressed, knowing if he and Travis were going to have a relationship, it had to be based on honesty.

  “It’s your fault she ran out. Every time I miss her…” Travis’s voice broke.

  “You blame me,” Logan finished.

  Thunder rolled. Travis’s eyes flashed defiance. “Yes.”

  His son was breaking his heart. But he deserved it. Somehow he had to make peace with it so they could both go on. “I can’t fault you for that. And I can’t be angry with you because of it. But I am angry with myself because I didn’t know what was going on in your head. Travis, no one is as important to me as you. Can you believe me?”

  “I dunno,” he mumbled.

  “I have always wanted you. From the moment your mother told me she was pregnant.”

  Travis raised his chin and, as the rain dripped down his face, he asked, “What about Mom?”

  Logan couldn’t tell Travis the truth about that. Besides, eventually Shelley did want and love their son. “You know your mom loved you.”

  Travis searched Logan’s face. After a while, he said, “Yeah, she did. But that night, why did she say she shouldn’t have married you?”

  “Because she didn’t want to get married. I talked her into it. I thought we’d be happy. I thought I could make her happy. But I couldn’t.”

  “Is that why she said you ruined her life?”

  “Travis…”

  “Dad, tell me the truth,” Travis pleaded, his green eyes large and deep and hurting.

  Logan couldn’t ignore his son’s plea. “Yes.”

  Comprehension dawned in Travis’s eyes. “She didn’t want me.”

  His son’s pain was Logan’s, too. “Only at first. She was younger than I was. She found out she was pregnant and panicked. But she did love you, Travis.”

  “You made her keep me.”

  Logan took his son by the shoulders. “I convinced her to marry me. That might have been a mistake. But keeping you and having you was not a mistake. The problems were between me and your mother.”

  Travis looked confused. “Do you miss her?”

  “Yes, I miss her. And I ache because she died the way she did. It shouldn’t have happened.” More than anything, Logan wanted to hug Travis. But there was still a wall around the boy that he wouldn’t let his father penetrate. They stood there for what seemed like hours, letting the storm swirl around them.

  The rain plastered Logan’s shirt to his body, and Travis was just as wet. Finally Logan said, “We’re soaked. And Meg’s probably worried. Let’s go back.”

  Travis looked toward the lean-to, then nodded. They walked back together, not touching and not speaking, but Logan felt they’d opened a window. Maybe now some air and sun could get in. If not today…maybe soon.

  When Meg spotted them, her eyes widened but she didn’t scold. Rather, she shrugged out of Logan’s jacket, then stripped off her pullover sweater, leaving only her cotton blouse.

  “You’ll get cold,” Logan chided.

  “And you two will catch pneumonia if you don’t get out of at least some of those wet clothes. I know you’re both stubborn, but believe me, I can be just as stubborn.”

  Logan checked his son’s face.

 
; Meg handed the jacket to Logan. “Shirt off, jacket on. No arguments.”

  He knew Travis might follow his lead. “You’re tough,” he grumbled.

  “You don’t know the half of it,” she responded, holding the sweater out to Travis. “The same goes for you.”

  Logan’s confrontation with Travis had left him shaken but hopeful. Maybe with everything out in the open, they could start fresh. Trying to establish a connection between them, he asked, “Do you think we should make her turn around?”

  Travis shrugged, and then his lips turned up in a small smile. “She could close her eyes, though.”

  With an exaggerated but patient sigh, Meg did.

  Mighty rolls of thunder continued to echo through the lean-to. Lightning cracked close by. None of it seemed to faze Meg. Logan knew Shelley would have cowered close to his side. Yet he remembered Meg waking up from her nightmare, asking him to hold her. She was strong but vulnerable, and he felt more for her each day. How would his relationship with Meg affect his son? Of course, if Meg didn’t stay…

  As they sat munching on trail mix in a stilted silence, Meg asked, “Have you discovered anything more on the break-in at the high school?”

  Logan knew she was trying to make conversation to cover the awkwardness. “Dead ends every way we look. No gossip. The kids aren’t talking.”

  “The kids don’t know anything,” Travis mumbled.

  “How do you know?” Logan asked. After all, Travis was on the scene, in the midst of it.

  His son shrugged again. “I don’t for sure. But the school’s not that big. Even if someone’s covering for somebody else, they usually slip. Nothing is going around. Zilch.”

  Logan frowned. “That means either someone outside the school did it or else someone in the school is intending to do it again.”

  “How do you figure?” Travis asked.

  “If it was a prank, someone would know something because there’s pride in carrying it off. Whoever did it must need the money.”

  Travis looked thoughtful. “When I was on the streets, no one told anyone anything. It was too risky. You didn’t even tell where you were going to crash that night.”

  “Where did you crash, Travis?” Logan had tried before, unsuccessfully, to get his son to talk about his experience.