“Yeah, you’re probably right. Sucks to be pussy whipped.”
I snort. “And you weren’t pussy whipped when you were with Marissa?”
He sighs, pulling a hand through his hair. “Only you, Amelia.”
I can see the hurt flicker through his eyes and for just a second I feel bad for him. He and Marissa were together for a very long time; it has to be hard. It doesn’t make up for what he did to me; it also doesn’t mean they won’t end up back together just like before. “Do you really wanna go there, Amelia? Do you want to know what our problems were? Do you want to know why we’re not together and won’t be ever again? Do you really care?”
I purse my lips at him and he shakes his head, gripping the comforter that’s swirled with colorful seashells. “See, I didn’t think you did. Let’s forget about all of that shit for one weekend because Lord knows I want to. I need a break from my life, too. Can we get along, for Paisley’s sake? Don’t you think she deserves to have a fun family vacation with both of her parents?”
“Don’t you try to guilt me, Tanner Cox.” I squint at him, pointing one finger.
He laughs gruffly before pushing to his feet. “Not trying to guilt you, girl. Now get that fine ass downstairs; we’re about to get our barbeque on and I’m sure we could use some dessert from the famous Amelia Emerson.”
“Well, I guess I can take care of that,” I grumble, biting back a grin as he starts to ramble out his endless requests for what I should make. Desserts do seem to make everything better. What’s better than a warm chocolatey hug to your mouth? “And don’t talk about my ass!” I yell after him sternly. I’m not exactly happy with Tanner being here, throwing a huge wrench into a weekend where I just wanted to relax and not think but he’s here now so I’ll figure out how to deal with him some way. Paisley will love that he’s here and has both of us to herself. At least I thought I could.
Chapter 11
After I decide to drop the attitude about Tanner being here, we all actually start to have a good time together—even Miller. I’ve never seen him so carefree before; it’s surprising and weird at the same time. When he scoops Monroe off the couch and throws her over his shoulder with a wink, I about die. Paisley is passed out in her pack and play in my room, which left the two of us alone.
“Well, I think I’m going to go clean up a bit.” I jump to my feet, all too enthusiastic about washing some dishes, but this is awkward and Monroe is going to get an earful about stranding me tomorrow. I’m sure she doesn’t care right now because she’s getting herself some action. I can’t say I’m not jealous. My lady bits are lacking some serious attention since the last time was a drunken blur.
“I’ll help.” My back stiffens when I feel him behind me, following me into the kitchen that’s a dirty mess, covered in unwashed dishes and food that wasn’t put away after our late night dinner of spaghetti after a long day at the beach. I can’t help but smile when I think about how adorable Paisley and Tanner were together. She tried to bury him in the sand but only got about as far as his knee before she gave up and then the two of them ran off into the water together.
I silently start working on the mess and Tanner slides next to me to dry dishes and put them away. He finally breaks the tension when a plate teeters slightly on the edge of the counter and he catches it right before it shatters to a million pieces, which would in turn most likely wake Miss Paisley up who is in desperate need of some sleep. “That was a spectacular save.”
“Thank you.” He bows before working on the rest of the dishes. “So how’s things at the bakery?”
“They’re going really good. I’ve been staying busy and I’ve actually started to branch things out a bit to help grow.” I clear my throat, shaking my head for letting that slip. Please don’t ask him what I’m doing to help the growth. I rush on, so hopefully he doesn’t. “Of course the AC breaking didn’t help much but it’s nice to get away for a bit.”
“Yeah, Miller mentioned something about that.” Phew.
“I’m beginning to wonder if Miss Monroe did something to sabotage the AC or something.”
“I wouldn’t put it past her.”
I laugh as I turn off the water and begin tidying up the countertops. I’m sad that tomorrow is our last day here but we have to go back to reality eventually. Who knows what reality with Tanner will be?
“You know they’re right,” he states quietly and I spin around to see him leaning against the counter with his arms crossed, his eyebrows creased thoughtfully. “We do need to try to get along better, for Paisley’s sake.”
“Right.” I fiddle with the hem of my cover up. I’ve basically been living in a bathing suit since we got here and I sure as hell haven’t minded that Tanner’s been doing the same thing. I’ve caught myself on more than one occasion drooling over his tan abs and the way they flex every time he moves. Manual labor day in and day out has done his body right. “I know I haven’t exactly made that easy.”
“What? You? You’re about the sweetest girl I know.”
I snort. “How in the world did you manage to keep a straight face when you said that?”
“Talented guy, I guess.” His lips twitch into a crooked smirk and I slap a hand against his chest, noticing my mistake of touching his smooth bare skin; it’s too late to stop myself. My hand itches to stay there but I snatch it away.
“Just about the most talented guy I know,” I answer with a roll of my eyes, tucking my hands behind my back. Control yourself, Amelia.
“Well, I’m going to try to be nicer. I’m sure Paisley likes having us together and even though I was mad at Monroe for intervening, I’m glad we had this weekend together. Maybe I’ll stop trying to avoid you all the time.”
“You will?” Surprise is evident in his voice and I tip my head at him.
“Tanner, I’m not really that difficult, am I?”
“Well…” he drags out. “You and your mom aren’t exactly easy to deal with. She looks at me like I’m the scum of the earth when all I try to do is be the best dad I can be. I know our situation isn’t exactly easy. If I could go back and change things, I would. I hope you know that. It’s just…” He pauses, blowing out a deep breath. “Marissa was going through some heavy shit when everything went down. I tried to fix her. I tried to help her but a person can only try so much before nothing else can be done.”
I want to ask what he was trying to fix. A spoiled, stuck up bitch? I don’t think there’s a way to fix that. Instead, I keep my lips zipped—no sense in dredging up the past. I don’t really know what to say to that, so I simply give a nod of my head. “I’ll try to be nicer and I’ll talk to my mom, but I’m not going to promise anything. She is the ice queen after all.”
“And you learned from the best, right? Does that make you the ice princess then?”
“Yes, just call me Elsa from now on. Paisley will love it.”
“You’re probably right.” He looks like he wants to say something more and I’m not sure I want to hear what it is.
“Well, I think I’m going to go hop in the pool for a bit to cool off. Goodnight.”
I don’t make it very far down the winding staircase that leads to the private pool before I realize he’s following me. Apparently he’s not done with our talk. I sigh and turn around, backing up a step when I notice how close he is. “Amelia, I’m glad that the tension between us seems to be lessening. But I need you to know that I didn’t choose Marissa over you and Paisley.”
“I don’t think that.” I avoid his eyes, backing up another step until I’m pushed up against the worn wood that surrounds the outdoor shower.
“You do,” he insists. “Will you please look at me?” Fingers lift my chin and I’m forced to look into his denim blue eyes, the ones that have always undone me with just a simple glance.
“Tanner, please. Let it be,” I beg softly.
“No,” he snaps. “I’m not, you’re gonna listen to me whether you like it or not.”
“No I’m not,” I sass right
back.
He glares at me and I return the look with narrowed eyes. “Fine.” I huff out a breath. “Please explain to me how you didn’t choose Marissa over me and Paisley—even just Paisley for that matter. Your daughter should be number one in your life, always. You could’ve given her what she deserved: a happy family. We could’ve had that so easily, Tanner. I mean, I could’ve put up with you for the rest of my life if I had to.”
He opens his mouth to say something, probably argue, but I hold up a hand and refuse to let him speak until I get out what I’ve needed to say for so long.
“Instead, you stayed with her even after I told you I was pregnant. I thought that would mean something to you, Tanner—I thought that would change everything. I wouldn’t have wanted you to choose me just because I was pregnant but there was something there between us, Tanner, and I know you felt it too. I’ve been racking my brain ever since trying to figure out why. Is it because of me? Why would you want to go back to the woman who cheated on you? Who you walked in on fucking some other guy. So please, tell me how exactly you didn’t choose her over us? Because it sure as hell doesn’t seem that way to me.”
His face is blank, unreadable, and he remains silent.
“I hate you so much,” I tell him, my voice catching in the back of my throat as I try to shake away the tears that are right on the edge of breaking over the barrier.
And then he’s pushing me against the back of the house, fisting his hands into my hair and slamming his mouth against mine. The tension seeps out of my body more and more with each stroke of his tongue. This kiss—this kiss—is going to haunt me for the rest of my life, ruining all other kisses to come. The emotion that he’s pouring into me, stroke for stroke, makes my body tremble and my knees wobble. I moan and he catches it in his mouth, pushing his tongue harder against mine and I don’t want it to end. I don’t want to have to think about what this means.
When he pulls away, I’m left gasping for air, my whole body tingling and feeling alive for the first time in a while. “I hate you,” I whisper, this time not so forcibly. I’m not sure who I’m trying to convince—Tanner or myself.
He smirks knowingly. “Right, and I hate you too.” And then he’s back to work, pulling at my bottom lip with his teeth before invading my mouth with his tongue once again. I savor the taste of Tanner that I didn’t realize I had missed so damn much. I feel like an alcoholic who’s just had their first drink in a long time and I relish every drop.
His hands begin untangling from my hair, sliding down my body painstakingly slow before pulling at the hem of my cover up and gliding underneath. He feathers his fingers across my bare thigh, never removing his mouth from mine before pushing my bikini bottoms to the side. I suck in a sharp breath as his fingers begin to explore, my eyes slamming shut as my mind blurs into a sweet euphoria.
He unlatches my mouth from his just as he sinks his fingers into me and I moan as he begins to work them in and out. “You hate me? Baby, this sure doesn’t feel like it. You’re so fucking wet and ready for me. You’re lovin’ this and you know it.”
I don’t argue. I can’t, really. I doubt I would even be able to form a rational sentence at this point as he works me with his fingers and I willingly tilt my head to the side to give him better access when his lips land on my neck. I hook one leg around his waist and he pushes into me harder, grinding his erection in time to my movements. “Tanner, please.”
“Please, what?” he mumbles against my skin, warm and delicious.
“I want you to…I want—” My head doesn’t know what it wants but my body sure does as I push my hips harder into his hand, a breathy moan releasing into the dark night.
It’s as if I splashed cold water on him.
He stops completely.
Removes himself from me completely.
Until there’s at least two feet of space between us. I look at him, confused, which only leads to more confusion. His brows are twisted together as he works to avoid my eyes. “Damnit. That shouldn’t have happened,” he mumbles before turning and taking the steps two at a time.
And then I’m left alone, like always it seems, sliding down the back of the house and collapsing into a heap. What in the hell was that and what am I supposed to do now?
Chapter 12
It’s been a little over a month since the whirlwind of a weekend that was supposedly meant for relaxation. After what happened, I just wanted to get home and as far away from Tanner as possible. After the confusion cleared, embarrassment set in. Clearly, he wanted nothing to do with me and simply let himself get caught up in the moment. I should never had let it have got that far. We needed to get along for Paisley, but we didn’t need to be together.
I shake my head, determined to get Tanner out of my brain once and for all. How dare he continue to be constantly on my mind after so much time has passed?
“Amelia, hey!” I look up just as I’m unlocking the front door to the bakery to see Monroe bounding towards me in a pink leotard and sweatpants. She’s way too chipper; it’s too damn early.
“Hey,” I grumble. “What are you doing up so early?”
“I wanted to get some alone time in at the studio today to work on some new pieces. Do you have time for a coffee before you open up?”
“Yeah, come on in and start a pot while I pop some muffins in the oven.”
“Oh, yum. What kind are you making today?”
“I think I’ll whip up some lemon crunch muffins. Those shouldn’t take long.”
Her eyes brighten as I flick on the light and she licks her lips. “Well, maybe I’ll just wait around to taste test one or two for you. Or five.”
“Okay.” I laugh as she follows me into the kitchen and I start pulling out ingredients.
“What are these?” she asks, picking up the glass jars I had lined up the night before.
“Nothing.” I snatch it out of her hands and set it back onto the counter before going back to work.
“Amelia,” she tilts her head towards me, raising a single brow, “you’re really not going to tell me?”
“No.” I point my spatula at her. “You’ll probably laugh.”
“Okay, is laughing a bad thing of all a sudden?”
I set my hands on my hips. “Good point, Mrs. Buchanan. It’s part of my new business venture.”
“Okay, Ms. Vague. Go on.” I start mixing my ingredients and sigh.
“I have this idea to start monthly boxes. You know how there’s so many different ones out there lately? I decided to hop on the train while it’s hot.” I set my spatula down and pick up the glass jar that she had been holding. “I present to you, box one of the Southern Sweets collection—adding a little bit of sugar and spice to bedrooms across America.” I wave my free hand in the air. “Well, not exactly across America, more like Michigan, Indiana, and Ohio—those Midwest states must need some hot and steamy—but eventually, I hope to make shipments to all fifty states.”
“Huh.” Her mouth pops open. “Interesting. So what’s in the jar? How exactly does it work?”
“This is my homemade peanut butter. Here, try it; it’s delicious.” I hand her a spoon and impatiently wait for her to try it. Monroe’s the one and only person I had talked to about this, and her opinion really did mean a lot to me.
“Mmm, yummy. This is beyond delicious.”
I smile wide at her enthusiasm. I thought it was pretty darn good myself, but hearing Monroe confirm it means the world to me. “Now, don’t you think that would be even more delicious if you were licking it off of Miller or the other way around?” I wiggle my eyebrows and she snorts.
“What?”
“The peanut butter—that’s the whole point. Who wants to mess with runny chocolate syrup? Peanut butter sticks so much better.”
She examines the jar more carefully and then nods. “Well now that you mention it…” She slaps a hand over her mouth when she reads the warning label. “Only you, Amelia. Only you.”
Warning—only use
if you are not allergic to nuts.
“What? I needed to clarify. So, this month, the people who signed up will get a jar of this lovely homemade peanut butter, a pair of these,” I open up a drawer filled with fuzzy handcuffs, “and,” I walk over to the fridge and pull out a sheet of chocolate covered strawberries. “These. I’m still working out kinks and coming up with new ideas so this is a small box, but eventually I’ll have four to six items in each one.”
“I love it; sign me up,” she says, not missing a beat.
“Really? You don’t have to just be—”
“Of course I want to! Who doesn’t need a little extra something in the bedroom sometimes? I mean, Miller keeps me satisfied plenty.” Her cheeks blaze and her eyes shift away from me. “But I love the idea! If you ever need any help coming up with ideas, you can totally use me as a guinea pig.”
“Um… I’ll keep that in mind. I’m not really sure I want to think about you and Miller getting it on.”
She rolls her eyes. “So,” she slides onto the lone plastic chair I have in the corner, “have you seen Tanner lately?”
“The other day when I picked up Paisley from Lydia’s.” I shrug. “We said hi. I behaved myself and was nice. Is that what you were wondering?” I was still trying to be cordial with Tanner, for Paisley’s sake; as long as he didn’t mention what happened between us, I would be completely fine.
Monroe’s eyebrows pop up. “Okay. Did something happen between you two?”
“Like what?” That comes out a lot squeakier than I intended. I duck my head down to pull out some muffin tins and avoid Monroe’s eyes at the same time.
“Well, you’ve been acting weird ever since we got back—weirder than usual anyway.”
“Gee, thanks.”
“Don’t worry, I love you for your weirdness. I just thought maybe you and Tanner were sneaking around together and didn’t want anyone to find out.”
“Excuse me?” I whirl around and smack the metal sheets down on the countertop with a clang. “You think I’ve been sneaking around? With Tanner? No, not at all.”
Southern Sweets (Midnight) Page 8
