Hard Justice: The Asylum Fight Club Book 3

by Bianca Sommerland

  He considered telling Noah that Doc had called for him on Christmas Eve, that he’d talked to Rhodey, and decided against opening up more pain. Instead, he held out the bag. “Blain said he could adjust it if it doesn’t fit. I hope…” He shook his head. “Merry Christmas, sir.”

  “Merry Christmas, my boy.” Taking the bag, Noah brushed his fingers over the soft fabric, feeling the shape of the gift as though trying to guess what it was. Finally, he drew it out. His lips curved with such pure joy it lit up his gray eyes as he studied the craftsmanship of the metal cuff, then every line of the engraving within. “This is beautiful, Jamie. A damn fine piece of art.” He put it on his left wrist, letting out a little laugh. “And a perfect fit, which Blain probably knew. The man has an eye for sizing people up—in more ways than one.” He met Jamie’s eyes, smile broadening. “Thank you. I absolutely love it and it will look stunning along with my leathers. Or jeans. Or nothing at all.”

  The last had Jamie’s grin softening as he canted his head and leaned in carefully to brush Noah’s lips with a kiss before he sat back to trace his fingertips along the line of the cuff. “It looks really nice against your skin. Even better than I pictured.”

  Still admiring the cuff, Noah nodded. “You’ve got a good eye too. And the weight of it feels nice. A perfect balance, something special that will make me think of you no matter what I’m doing.”

  Not that it was comparable, but…

  Jamie’s hand went to his collar. “I know what you mean.”

  Hand over his, Noah stroked the back of his fingers. “I hope it was comforting. There are some things that are difficult to explain, that you’ll come to know about me over time, but whatever my regrets...giving you my collar isn’t one.”

  “I’m pretty new to all this, sir, and I guess there are things we’re both learning about each other still, but it never crossed my mind that you regret what we have. You make me feel like I’m more than just a sub, and judging by the rumors, I’m pretty sure you’ve had a ton—” He grinned sheepishly up at Noah. “—a lot better behaved than me.”

  “Hmm, certainly some who weren’t as interesting as you. Which likely made a few jealous since I don’t like wasting my time or being bored. There are subs around The Asylum—or were before I went to prison—who like to check off Doms like some kind of challenge they need to face. To see what they can endure and how much better they perform compared to everyone else.” Noah gave him a dry look. “I’m sure you can imagine how little that would interest me.”

  One side of Jamie’s mouth kicked up. “You’d be ‘unimpressed’.”

  Noah inclined his head. “Yes. I’ll take an honest sub with a lot to learn over an experienced one who pretends to know it all any day of the week. Not that I haven’t played the games a time or two because a sub’s urges aligned with mine for the night, but I’ve found I prefer more substance than most can provide. And it’s much more fun being able to see all those pretty marks on a body you’ve claimed in every way. To know they mean something for you both.”

  The intensity of Noah’s regard made Jamie moisten his lips. “I have like three questions rolling around in my skull and I don’t know which to ask first. I’m so glad I didn’t know how dumb I was when I walked in the bar the first time. And I’m so glad you were there. I have a feeling those first moments were more...you...than where we went with everything. Is that more like how you’re going to be now? What do I need to do? Will I still interest you? What do you actually enjoy?”

  “That was four questions.” Noah tapped Jamie’s nose, letting out a soft laugh. “You interest me. I enjoy you, that won’t change. What may change a little is how I work with you to make sure you can be part of everything here. You’ve made some big strides while I was gone and I won’t let that slide, but I have no problem showing you what I expect. I think exploring what works for us will be enjoyable. Most of the time. And for the rest, there’s a sore ass and plenty of pennies to help lessons stick.”

  Noah’s Dominance settling around his shoulders like a hug, Jamie sighed softly, drifting a little. “Thank you, sir. I’m glad it’s not the cage though. I finally figured out what it was for.” He glanced to the closet. “When I first got here, I thought you had a dog.”

  Following Jamie’s gaze, Noah looked a little grim. “Curtis’s idea of a...joke.”

  “Oh.” He licked his lips. “I mean, I’d go in there if you told me, but Matt’s the puppy.”

  “Would you, now?” A dark glint said he had Noah’s interest. Cupping Jamie’s chin, Noah ran the pad of his thumb over his lip. “What else would you do?”

  “Well…” Gaze open, willing, he darted his tongue, and tasted musk and salt. “Anything, sir, if it pleases you…”

  One brow rose, dubious. “Anything?”

  Jamie’s earned nod came without hesitation. He’d do anything for this man. He might not get it the first time, but he’d keep trying. Until Noah told him he got it right.

  That was when it got real.

  When he knew where he belonged.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Water streamed over Noah’s flesh, uninjured hand rested against the wall, careful to keep his cast out of the spray, even though he’d awkwardly wrapped it in cling wrap before coming to the gym showers. After three weeks, Doc had cleared him for light exercise and he’d been eager to do more than simply walk up and down the stairs to the bar, moving like he was nearing his first century. The slow run on the treadmill for the third day in a row, along with some ridiculously light free weights, gave him a burst of energy.

  Which didn’t last, but he’d take it.

  This time of day, he had the gym to himself. Curtis tended to wake early for his daily workout routine and Lawson preferred his after a long day doing paperwork for various business clients. Midmorning, the few club members who availed themselves of the space had gone off to their regular jobs.

  He washed himself the best he could one-handed. Tonight, Jamie would do a more thorough job, but he needed this bit of independence. That first week of being practically helpless was almost worse than the injury itself. Pain, he could deal with. Needing his little cat to help him to the bathroom so he could take a piss? Not so much.

  After rinsing off, he wrapped a towel around his waist and used another to dry his hair as he made his way to the locker room, slowing at the sound of voices. He took a deep breath. This was his damn club. Like fuck would he hesitate to enter any damn space he pleased. Besides, he needed his clothes.

  A neutral smile on his lips, he kept going. His smile slipped when Shea and Jackson stopped talking and looked over at him, gazes closed off.

  Jackson spoke first, a hesitant smile on his lips. “Hey, man. Heard you’d gotten in an accident or something? Good to see you up and about.”

  All right, this was good. Normal. He could do normal. He hadn’t been sure what story Lawson and Curtis had given the club members for his absence, but he’d go along with having been in an accident. The whip lashes getting infected definitely hadn’t been intentional, so it wasn’t completely untrue. “Thanks. Be good to get back in the ring.”

  “I bet.” Shea’s eyes moved over him, settling on the still red scar on his shoulder. “Did you drive off the road or something? The wrist I get, but—”

  “I’d love to relive the whole thing in detail, really.” Noah’s jaw hardened. He opened his locker, careful not to turn and let them see his back. Earning the lashes had been bad enough. He refused to submit to the shame of having anyone see them now that he could avoid it. He pulled on the dark red, soft cotton shirt his mother had gotten him for Christmas, along with several others. Not his usual style, which was probably why she’d gotten it. Buttons were easier to manage than anything he had to slide on over his head. He stepped closer to his locker to hide the tension that he couldn’t keep off his face as he pulled on his boxers, then his jeans.

  Once he was dressed, facing the men was a little easier.

  Jackson
was the one who broke the silence. “Look, I get I fucked up letting Jamie come here on his own, but it’s been months. He’s my friend. I met him while I was still modeling and...I get his history. He’s your boy. But I still want to be there for him.”

  Noah considered the man for a moment. The request was reasonable. He’d probably have let Jamie reconnect with his friend a while back if it had even occurred to him, but he’d put Jackson in the irrelevant box. Everyone had their box then. Like in prison. It was an easy way to separate friends from enemies. Potential threats from those he could ignore. Another for those he needed to protect. Family. Friends. Lovers…

  The game was so much easier to play that way, but he refused to let his whole life be a game anymore. Some of it? Sure, he still enjoyed the odd move. Gaining the upper hand.

  But games were supposed to be fun.

  He inclined his head. “If he wants to, I’ll allow Jamie to speak to you.” He considered Shea for a moment. “I imagine I don’t have to tell you he’s off limits.” He straightened the collar of his shirt, careful to keep the scar the man had noticed hidden. “As is Reed. I know how much you like to test the boundaries. See if a sub is truly off the table. And I don’t give a fuck, so long as you stay away from those who are mine.”

  Shea’s brow rose, his lips curving as though Noah had thrown down an interesting challenge. “Reed’s yours? Curtis know that?”

  Maybe the boxes still had some use after all. He let out a soft laugh and patted Shea’s cheek. “In some ways? Yes. But please, go near him again. If he doesn’t hand you your own balls, Curtis will.”

  “But not you?” Shea cocked his head. “The old Noah would be giving me a date and time.” He jutted his chin at Noah’s wrist. “A month? Two? Just say the word.”

  “How about Friday? That soon enough for you?” Curtis came around the lockers, slapping his hand down on Shea’s shoulder hard. He arched a brow as he looked to Noah. “You don’t mind if I step in here, since he’s so interested in my boy?”

  Keeping his expression blank, Noah shrugged. “Go for it. This isn’t as entertaining as I thought it would be. All this talk because the man wants a stiff one.” He clucked his tongue and smiled at Jackson. “You really should take better care of him.”

  Jackson held up his hands, indicating he wanted no part of what his best friend had just walked into.

  “This wasn’t about you. Or Reed.” Shea let out a cold laugh and shrugged at Curtis. “But sure. Let’s do this.”

  That settled, Shea and Jackson closed their lockers and headed to the gym. Noah breathed in slowly, his hands shaking as he began to do up his buttons. He couldn’t get the first one through the hole.

  Curtis moved closer, brushing his hands aside. “Let me—”

  “I can do it!” Noah clamped his lips shut when Curtis jerked away from him. Closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m sorry. Thank you.”

  Silence, then Curtis moved toward him, doing up the buttons. When Noah opened his eyes, the other man gave him a hard look. “You know how it works here and that’s why you’re trying to be all tough. You’re not alone. And you’re not a hundred percent yet. Don’t leave yourself or Jamie hanging, trying to prove something you’re not ready for.”

  “I would be if I hadn’t…” Noah shook his head. Rubbed a hand over his face once Curtis was done. “My authority used to be absolute. It’s never been more obvious that it’s not.”

  “And that fucking sucks. But there are three names on the lease here. You, me, and Lawson.” Curtis hesitated, then reached out, curving his hand around the back of Noah’s neck and touching their foreheads together. “Get better. Lawson’s almost at full strength. We’ll show them all who’s in control soon, but until then, trust me to man the fort, okay?”

  Damn it, he loved the confidence in Curtis’s tone. He wasn’t sure he’d ever heard it before, not at this level. Maybe it had taken both him and Lawson being forced to step back to show the man the power he truly had.

  If so, he’d take the pain. And needing Curtis to step up for him. It didn’t mean he was weak. It meant the man he’d seen in that rough, arrogant teen, whose future had been nothing but what crimes he could get away with to please his family, never considering the lives he impacted, had become everything he’d hoped for and more.

  “Lawson’s been working a lot, so I haven’t seen him. How’s he doing?” As much as things seemed to have settled, he still sensed some uncertainty in the people around him. Maybe Lawson and Curtis would enjoy a few days away from him. Lawson had gotten it while catching up with his work. Curtis stuck around when he went to the bar for coffee, but the conversations were all small talk before he went back to whatever project he was working on. With Reed and Jamie.

  Yet another thing Noah was excluded from. He couldn’t fight, he wasn’t cleared to work on anything but the few small renovation approvals Curtis and Lawson hadn’t already contracted out. Hell, he’d been more useful in prison.

  “He’s getting stronger. That cough is hanging on, so he won’t touch Matt. He’s afraid to get him sick.” Curtis’s lips slanted. “Not that I mind.”

  “I bet.” Noah chuckled and closed his locker. “I’d say I was surprised he’s willing to share with you at all, but neither of you was the problem in our relationship. You would’ve been closer if you weren’t trying to get my full attention.”

  Curtis stilled, his brow furrowed. “He...wanted more say in who you were with. To be an equal partner. I wanted you. Just you. I didn’t care who else you brought around—I mean, after Lawson. I just wanted to know I mattered.” He shook his head and let out a rough laugh. “Admitting that, and you telling me it would never happen? That was fucking brutal.”

  Starting for the door, Noah hesitated, glancing over at Curtis, who stood by his side. A much better place for him than he’d been in back then. He remembered the moment, and how much he’d wanted to take everything Curtis offered. How easy it would have been.

  The last box was packed. Noah lifted it and brought it to the moving truck. He’d expected this day would come, but somehow, he still wasn’t ready. Any more than he’d been when Lawson told him he’d bought his own condo from the money he’d saved after getting a few jobs advising businesses in New York that wouldn’t hire him, but were willing to use the insider information he’d gained before his father had disowned him.

  He turned after sliding the box in the back of the truck. It was over. He’d done his job. Curtis didn’t need him anymore. Reed and Ezran still did. He’d focus on them.

  Curtis came to his side. Met his eyes and dropped to his knees, right on the sidewalk, drawing wide eyed stares from those who passed. “Tell me to stay and I will. I don’t care who else you fuck. Just...tell me you still need me and I’ll be right here. I…” He swallowed hard. Lowered his gaze. “I love you.”

  What had Noah done? He’d started with no plan but to make Curtis see the damage he’d done. He’d used the same techniques his uncle had used on him. And it had worked. Curtis understood what he’d done wrong. He’d changed his name. He never wanted to go back. His family was nothing but a past he wanted to forget.

  But seeing Curtis on his knees, knowing his potential, he knew he had to make him stand. On his own. And never give anyone that kind of power over him. Least of all Noah.

  As much as he’d grown to love the man, he could never trust anything he gave him wouldn’t be tainted by the control he’d taken. By force.

  There was only one way to give it back.

  “Stand up.” He cupped Curtis’s cheek. Smiled at him. And said the one thing he knew would set the man on the right path. “Don’t ever kneel for me again. I made you stronger than that. Go. Prove to me all this time I spent on you wasn’t a waste.”

  Pain flashed through Curtis’s eyes. Then determination. He shoved to his feet and gave Noah a detached smile. “I didn’t get it when Lawson left, but now I do. You’re incapable of loving anyone.”

  “Tell me tha
t in a week when you’re begging me to fuck you again.”

  “I won’t.” Curtis’s eyes narrowed. “So is this how it ends? You want me to hate you?”

  “No.” Noah dropped the mask. The pretense. He gave the man all the honesty he could. “You’re going to find someone, Curtis. And you’ll be happy.” He shook his head. “But it won’t be with me.”

  “Tell me something.” He needed to know. Needed the assurance that every choice he’d made wasn’t a mistake. “If I’d kept you...do you think you’d be with Reed now?”

  That brought Curtis up short. “You know the answer. You wouldn’t have let me even look at him that way.”

  True. He rolled the words over in his mind. “I think it was implied neither you or Lawson should consider him available to you.”

  With a rough laugh, Curtis reached out and squeezed his shoulder. “It was. To us. But not to him.” He gave Noah a crooked grin. “You wanted him to have that kind of freedom and he used it. Not always in the best way. But you don’t get to take that away now.”

  “I don’t want to.” Noah grinned back. “Not that I have a say, but let’s pretend. The boy played with Doc to get his fix. I’d much rather you and Lawson make sure I never hear anything like that again.”

  “Wait until you hear about Kovit. Or the newbie Dom he—”

  “Nope.”

  “But what about—”

  Noah cut Curtis with a hard look. “I wasn’t here. You left him with Lawson. You really want to keep going?”

  The man shut his mouth and gave a firm nod. “No. But fuck, it’s hard to see where the lines are with you at this point. I kinda get why Shea was testing them.”

  Yeah...good to know. He pushed through the doors to the ring. Smiled as he saw Jamie block a punch from Matt.

  His smile faded when Jamie got knocked off his feet with the next.

  “Fuck, Jamie. Why did you…” Matt looked over his shoulder, locking on to what had distracted Jamie.

  Which was Noah. His boy never failed to notice him.