The Lonely Living

by McMurray, Sean

  “Hmm. You spend a lot of time with that journal of yours. Did you ever think about becoming a writer?”

  I glanced at my journal, which was sitting on an end table next to me. “No, not really.”

  Sam leaned forward. “Blake, I need to be honest with you and please don’t be mad. But I’ll understand if you are.” She paused. “I’ve read through your journal and it’s quite good.”

  “You read through my journal?” I responded. “That’s private.”

  “I know. I know. It’s just…you won’t let me get close and sometimes I get the feeling like you don’t want me here, like I’ve intruded on your own little world.”

  I grabbed the journal off the table. “You hadn’t until you read this.”

  “I’m sorry Blake.” She pleaded. “I really am. I just like being here with you.”

  “Well…” My anger began to subside. “I like you being here because…because I like you.”

  Her face reddened. “You like me?”

  I felt a sudden swell of something between joy and fear. “Yes…very much but…”

  “But what?”

  “You don’t want to be with me. A girl like you would never have even given me a second thought before all of this happened and…I’m dangerous.”

  “What do you mean dangerous?”

  I held up the journal like I was lawyer presenting evidence to a one person jury. “You read my journal, you should know why.”

  Sam spoke softly, “This is about your sister isn’t it?”

  Tears began to well in my eyes and it took a moment for me to speak. “I was supposed to take care of her and I let her die.”

  “I don’t believe that’s true.”

  I said shamefully, “If you knew what happened, you would think different of me.”

  “You never wrote about what happened to her.”

  “And I never will.” I paused, “But, I will tell you and then you can decide if you want to stay with me or not.”

  She nodded and I stared deep into the fire. The embers crackled and popped.

  “I came here with my sister, just as I was instructed by my father. We scratched a living off what little was already here, while we waited for him to show. Abbey was an insulin dependent diabetic and very quickly we ran out of insulin. The days grew shorter and the nights colder and soon we were out of food, save the few fish I managed to catch. We both grew hungry and weak and I should have left the island then in search of supplies, but I kept telling Abbey that my father would show up to take care of us. But he didn’t and soon, Abbey’s…” I paused and swallowed hard. “Abbey’s health worsened and she grew weaker and weaker until one morning she wouldn’t wake up. It was then that I decided to go for supplies. I set out for Red Lake in the car I drove to get here, but I found no pharmacy, all I found was death and destruction. And then I went to Burbank. I knew exactly where to find some, so I made my way there. Before I could reach Miller’s Pharmacy I was attacked by a horde of those things. I hit the gas and drove right though them until I plowed through the back wall of the pharmacy. I stumbled out of the car and searched the pharmacy until I found some insulin. By then, the horde had reached me and I barely made it to the car alive. I hit the gas and slammed through the front glass doors and out onto the street leaving the horde behind me. I drove as fast as I could, but I ran out of gas about three quarters of the way here. I was forced to make the rest of the trip on foot in the dark. The whole time I wasn’t worried about my safety, but Abbey’s, and I prayed and prayed to God that I would find her alive. By the time I reached the island it was dawn.” I stopped myself, not wanting to finish the rest of the story. I took a deep breath and forced the words out. “I rushed inside the cabin and discovered that I was too late…Abbey was dead.”

  “I’m sorry Blake.” Offered Sam.

  I shook my head. “I could have saved her if only I’d left sooner.”

  “Why didn’t you?”

  I dropped my head in shame. “Because…Because I was afraid.”

  The island was quieter at that moment than ever before. Eventually I stood to my feet and said, “I need to go to bed.”

  Sam nodded understandingly and I solemnly climbed the stairs to my room. Once there, I fell face first into my mattress and cried myself to sleep.

  13

  I woke up late the next morning. The house was eerily quiet. I sat up in bed, slipped on my shoes and headed down stairs. The fire was burning low and there was breakfast waiting for me on a TV tray next to my chair. But, there was no sign of Sam. I looked back up the stairs.

  Her door is shut, so she must have went back to sleep.

  I sat down in my chair and scarfed down the food she had left me. I chased it with some cold water and then walked out on the back porch to get some more wood for the fire. That’s when I saw them. Tracks leading from the porch to the shed. I followed the tracks to the shed and opening the door, found that the snowmobile was missing.

  “Damn it.” I said in frustration. “What is she doing? It’s not safe.”

  Wait…

  Staring into the empty shed, it occurred to me. Sam made her choice. Now that she knew the truth about me, she chose to leave and although I was deeply saddened, I didn’t blame her. I dropped my head. I told myself I wouldn’t chase her. I told myself that I would let her go.

  Suddenly, a drip of cold water dropped from the gutter of the shed unto my neck sending a chill down my spine. I turned and stared out over the frozen lake. I could see the green of the pine trees in the distance and the light of the sun gleaming off the melting snow. I could feel its warmth and hear the drips of water falling from the trees as if it was raining in the woods. Then all at once it hit me. The world was thawing out, which meant they were thawing out! Sam had no idea what kind of danger she was in.

  I rushed inside the house and quickly got dressed. I grabbed my canteen from the kitchen and filled it with water then went to the war room and grabbed my shotgun, extra shells and my handgun. I rushed back outside. I grabbed a can of fuel and then hurried to the back side of the shed. Beneath a worn, blue tarp was another snowmobile. My dad had inherited it when he bought the place and I had used it until I came across the one that Sam took. It had been a while since I fired it up so I was unsure if I could even get it started. It was so old it didn’t have an electric start. I filled it with gas and then gave the pull start a mighty tug. The engine sputtered for a second, then stopped. I did it again, with the same result.

  “Come on.”

  I pulled it hard and the engine sputtered for a short two seconds. I adjusted the choke and did it again and again until finally, the engine fired up. Excited, but also a little winded from all the pulling, I hopped onto the seat and drove off.

  I cursed myself for sleeping in and questioned my hearing. I’d let my guard down since Sam arrived and now I was paying for it. I followed the tracks of the snowmobile. She was heading to Burbank. I pushed the engine as hard as it would go, fully knowing that unless she stopped, I would not catch up. My only hope was that I’d reach her before they did and I dared to hope. I followed the tracks all the way to the outskirts of Burbank and cruised in on fumes. I stopped the snowmobile at the top of the hill that led down into the small city. I climbed off, readied my shotgun and made the precarious trek down the hill. Once I reached the bottom, I followed the tracks through the abandoned town. Every sound met my ears with vengeance. The crack and bust of ice thawing, the crash of large chunks of snow sliding off roof tops, it came from all directions and with every sound I waited for the wail and moan of the horde followed by the stampeding feet. Suppressing the fear that invaded every ounce of my being, I kept my focus on the tracks, following them down back alleys and side streets. I came to a familiar building. The boot prints in the snow indicated that she had got off the snowmobile and went inside.

  “What was she doing in Miller’s Pharmacy?”

  Since there were tracks leading away from the pharmacy I didn’t need
to look for her inside. Which was a good thing because I never wanted to step foot in that place again.

  I continued down the road until I got to the main drag that followed the river. It was getting late and there was still no sign of Sam. Nevertheless, I pressed on. I took it as a good sign that I saw no footprints in the snow aside from my own. I suddenly smelled smoke and stopped in my tracks.

  “I know where she is.”

  I was standing in the middle of an intersection, two blocks away from the school where I found Sam. I hurried in the direction of my old high school and the smell strengthened. Relieved, I saw Sam standing in the snow staring into the burned rubble of the school. I yelled her name. She didn’t respond and I was overcome with trepidation.

  No, please no…

  I raised my shotgun and approached her apprehensively, not knowing if I would even be able to pull the trigger if I had to. I stepped closer and called to her again. “Sam!”

  Slowly, she turned and I saw that my fears were in vain and she had not changed into one of them. Relieved, I lowered my shotgun and ran to her. When I got closer I noticed her eyes were red with fresh tears.

  “Sam, what are you doing? It’s much too dangerous here.”

  She ignored my question and stared pensively into the smoldering rubble. “You aren’t the only one that’s haunted you know.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “My mom died in there.”

  “I’m sorry Sam.”

  “Not as much as I am.” After a few seconds of quiet she glanced over at me. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

  I was perplexed and expecting the worse. “Okay.”

  “The reason my Mom—”

  Before she could finish, a long wail rang from the distance.

  “They’ve discovered us.” I grabbed Sam tightly by the arm. “Whatever you want to tell me, you’re going to have to tell me later.”

  I didn’t give her a chance to argue, I pulled her over to the snowmobile and we climbed on. I fired it up and with the sled we pulled away. We left town in the same direction I had come. Upon reaching the top of the valley, I stopped and climbed off the snowmobile. I pushed aside Sam’s duffle bag and grabbed a can of gas from the sled then hustled over to the one I drove in on.

  I filled the tank with all the gas I had in the can. “We need to put as much distance between us and them as possible.” I yanked the pull start and my snowmobile sputtered to a start. I climbed on, “Get to the lake house, even if it means leaving me behind. Do you understand?”

  Sam nodded and we pulled away. I tried my best to keep up with her, but my snowmobile just couldn’t go as fast as hers. We followed the river as it winded toward Red Lake. The further we got from Burbank, the safer I felt, but dusk was approaching and all of Minnesota would soon be covered in darkness. If we were going to make it to the lake house, we were going to have to travel at night. To make matters worse a heavy fog was forming over the melting snow, limiting our visibility. Overtime Sam pulled away from me until the red of her tail light was all I could see. I followed it like it was the shine of a light house. Not wanting to put too much distance between us, Sam slowed down and allowed me to catch up a bit. She looked back to make sure I was okay and I gave her a thumbs up. Just as she turned around a shadow moved in the fog.

  “Sam!”

  I screamed for her, but it was too late. The creature leapt and knocked her off the snowmobile. The two tumbled over each other as the snowmobile careened out of control toward the river. I hit the throttle and the engine wined as I attempted to get to her. Sam yelped in pain as the two came to a stop with the fiend on top, pinning her down. Sam tried to break free of its grasp, but it was no use. The undead creature howled and then opened its mouth wide, preparing to sink its teeth into Sam’s flesh. Just as it went in for the kill, I leapt from my snowmobile into the creature, knocking it off Sam. It and I rolled one over the other, until I slammed hard into the base of a tree, a few yards from the creature. The creature pushed itself off the ground until it was on its haunches, then screamed at me with anger. I lay dazed and breathless against the tree trunk as the creature launched its attack. Its black eyes ablaze with hunger, the fiend scrambled toward me on all fours. I managed to slip the Berretta out of my thigh holster and fire a couple shots into its torso. Still, the fiend slammed into me, then reared back to strike. Holding the creature back with my left arm, I lifted the handgun to its chin and with its gnashing teeth just inches from my face, pulled the trigger. The bullet ruptured the top of the creature’s skull, splattering the tree limbs above me with brain matter as the fiend fell limp against me.

  “Yuck…” I said as I pushed the creature’s lifeless corpse off me. I caught my breath and climbed to my feet. Suddenly, Sam screamed from somewhere in the fog. I spun around and frantically searched every direction. “Sam!” I cried out louder, “Sam!” I yelled out again and again until I was breathless. The fog besieged me in a wall of white and Sam, alive or dead, was nowhere to be found.

  14

  I stumbled through the wall of fog until it seemed to lighten up. I called her name again, “Sam!”

  “Blake!” I heard from a distance. “Help!”

  Her cries were coming from the river, so I sprinted in that direction. Through the fog I saw Sam’s snowmobile had crashed through the ice and was quickly sinking into the river. Sam, in immense pain, was limping toward it.

  “My bag!” She yelled. “I need my bag!”

  The snowmobile disappeared into the icy water and only the sled was above the surface. Sam dove for the sled and latched on to it, trying desperately to reach her duffle bag before it was pulled under.

  “Let it go!” I yelled as I stumbled down the bank to the edge of the river.

  “I can’t.”

  More of the ice gave way and Sam fell into the water.

  “Sam!” I screamed.

  “Help me…” She cried as she was pulled into the freezing river. She splashed against the water and frantically clawed the ice, but she couldn’t stop herself from being pulled under by the current.

  I reached the edge of the river, searching for some way to reach her. With no other ideas, I pulled off my belt and wrapped one end around my wrist. Taking hold of a thick root sticking out of the snow with my left hand, I extended my body and tossed the other end of the belt to Sam.

  “Grab it!” I ordered. Her head bobbing in and out of the water, she reached unsuccessfully for the belt. Grimacing in pain, I stretched as far as I could towards her. “Come on, Sam.” I said through clenched teeth.

  She reached for the belt again and then again. Finally, just before she was pulled under the ice, she was able to grab hold of it. Straining with all my might, I pulled Sam unto the bank. She rolled onto her back, clutching her bag against her chest.

  In between breaths I asked, “Was it worth it?”

  She didn’t answer. Instead she tried to climb to her feet, but collapsed when she tried to put weight on her left foot.

  I caught her. “Sam…”

  “My ankle,” she said painfully, “I think it’s broken.” She was in obvious pain and soaked to the bone.

  “Come on,” I said, “I’ll carry you.” I squatted down and she, quite excruciatingly, climbed onto my back. I carried her up the bank and to my snowmobile, which had come to a stop in some bushes. I sat her on the snowmobile and with great effort, pulled the vehicle out of the bushes. I fired it up and climbed on. “Hold on to me.” I said.

  Sam wrapped her arms around my waist and I hit the throttle. Darkness had fallen and the fog was now very thick. Though the bushes had stopped the snowmobile’s momentum, there was some damage as the engine sputtered along and the ride rattled beneath us. We moved cautiously, following the river, unsure if at any moment we were going to be ambushed from the fog. Sam was soaking wet and very cold. I could feel her body trembling and hear her teeth chattering over the whine of the engine.

  “Sam,” I said o
ver my shoulder, “are you alright?”

  She nodded, trying to be strong, but her shivering anguish betrayed her.

  If we don’t stop to warm ourselves and get her some dry clothes soon, she’ll…

  “We need to get you warm.” I said finally. “You need some dry clothes.”

  She shivered, “W-W-Where…”

  An image of a lonely church steeple appeared on my mind. I sighed in reluctance. “I know a place we can stop.” I sped up and in a few minutes the silhouette of the abandoned church appeared in the fog.

  “Th-Th-that is your f-f-fathers church isn’t it?” Asked Sam.

  “Christ Church by the River…” I answered.

  “Are you sure you want to s-stop here?”

  I looked back over my shoulder and said resignedly, “We have no choice.”

  I slowed down as we approached the church. We slid to a stop in front of the main entrance. I hopped off the snowmobile. I paused and stared into the front glass doors.

  “D-Do you think their inside?” Sam asked.

  I turned around and grabbed my shotgun from the back of the snowmobile. “I’m going to find out.” I reached to my thigh holster and pulled out the berretta. “Do you know how to use this?”

  She shrugged her shoulders.

  I showed her the proper stance and repeated the words my father had told me. “When the target is close, line up the sights, release the safety and pull the trigger.” I handed her the gun. “Show me.”

  She held the gun out in front of her and aimed into the fog. “L-Line up the s-s-sights and pull the trigger.”

  “Good,” I said as I pointed to the button just above the trigger, “But, don’t forget the safety.”

  She nodded. “B-Be careful.” She said.

  I flipped on the flash light that was taped to the bottom of the barrel, along with my headlamp and took a deep breath. “I always am.” I pulled on the door and discovered it was unlocked. Fearing what I might find inside, I hesitated before entering. I glanced back at Sam and then stepped into the darkness of the foyer. I followed the hallway to the main doors. I tried the knobs, they were locked.