“Let me get some pajamas on,” she says, stepping back a little.
“Not those little short-shorts,” I interject.
She giggles and nods before she disappears into the closet.
I flop back on her bed and try my hardest to reset my thoughts about her. This is Lola. Little Lola who used to get scared of Are You Afraid of the Dark? and who cried the time Jonathan stepped on a ladybug. She might look very fuckable, but she’s not. She’s off the table, totally off limits.
“Get in,” she says, motioning to the bed when she comes back out in a loose T-shirt and a baggier pair of shorts.
I crawl under the covers and lie back on the pillow as she gets in with me.
“Is this fucked up?” she asks me.
“What?” I say, waiting for my eyes to adjust after she turns off the light.
“The fact that we’re fucking around and stuff? I mean, I like it. I like what you’re doing to me, and I want you to keep doing it. Is it bad to do this shit if it feels good and it doesn’t hurt anybody?”
“I guess it depends on what shit we do.” I shrug and try to rationalize it in my mind. “Like you said, it’s not hurting anybody and we both like it, so it can’t be that bad, right?”
To my surprise, she moves with lightning speed, and in a flash, she’s sitting on top of me and looking down at me. I smile up at her, and I kind of like this. I always knew Lola was a tough chick, but I like that’s she can be a take-charge kind of girl when it comes to sexual stuff too. She’d be a rad girlfriend because she’d be cool to hang out with and she’d probably just shove you onto the bed and ride you, which is way hot.
“I don’t know why I like this so much,” she says, smiling. She’s not trying to be flirty, but she is. She really, really is.
“I don’t know why I like you jumping on me and straddling me with all your clothes on.” I grin and let my hands roam up her thighs. “I’d like it so much more if we were both bare-ass naked.”
She quietly giggles—since we definitely can’t risk a run-in with Theresa while Lola’s on top of me.
She looks into my eyes for a second, and I feel so connected to her. I put my hand on her hip, but not in a “let’s fuck” kind of way, just to hold onto her, to touch her.
“I just trust you, I guess,” she explains. “I feel okay about doing this stuff with you, and I never feel okay about doing this stuff with anyone.”
“Really?” I smile.
First, I’m really glad that she likes this and that she doesn’t feel weird about it. Second, it’s great to hear that she trusts me, because I trust her with my fuckin’ life. Third, I’m surprised that she said she doesn’t feel okay doing this with anybody else. Anybody? Not a single guy but me?
“I’m really self-conscious around everybody but you,” she says, looking down with super-cute shyness. “I get all squirrely when boys touch me or try to hook up with me. I’m, I don’t know, high-strung, I guess. I don’t feel like that with you, though. I actually like when you touch me. It feels natural, you know?”
Perhaps the best words I’ve heard in years.
“I feel like that too. I mean, I have no problems touching other girls, or letting them touch me, but I feel totally mellow when I touch you. It’s hard to explain. It’s like you…you make me all relaxed or something.”
“That’s how I feel!” she says, giving me a light little smack on the stomach. “Like right now, if you were, say, Mike Bernard or Deshawn Jackson, I’d be shaking like a leaf. When Jeremy Chen felt me up one time, I remember being so nervous that I practically gave myself a migraine. You, on the other hand, touched my boobs in the kitchen a little while ago and I didn’t bat an eye.”
I chuckle, taking care to be quiet. I love that she feels so comfortable around me. I find that the problem with most girls is that they think guys are judging them all the time. They all hate something about themselves, from their weight to their lips to their hair to the size of their boobs. I like that Lola doesn’t get skittish about that stuff when she’s with me.
“I bet you’d fuck like a minx, Lo,” I joke, resting my hand low on her stomach between us like they want you to do when you shoot those soft-core, late-night cable channel movies so nobody can see the penetration.
She covers her mouth and muffles her laughs. “Why do you say that?”
“I bet you’d be totally uninhibited in the right situation. You’d let loose, babe. The best sex I’ve had was with girls who just dropped all their insecure bullshit and went for it,” I explain. “I mean, look at you right now, getting on top like this. You may be a virgin, but I think you’re a wild girl at heart.”
She blushes and she looks so pretty. “You think I’d be all aggressive in bed?”
“I do.” I nod with a laugh.
I can’t help it; I grab her hips and rock her back and forth a little bit to show her how to move. She follows along and pretty soon she’s moving all on her own. I can picture it, how she’d look riding me like this. She wouldn’t bounce up and down like the chicks in my movies; she’d probably do this slow back and forth thing like she’s doing right now. I can just see her throwing her head back and calling out my name.
She puts her hands on my stomach and grinds into me a little. The look on her face is really lustful—and really hot. I can feel myself getting turned on, but before I get too hard, she stops and giggles at me.
“I can’t believe I did that,” she says, leaning all the way forward against my chest.
“It’s no big deal. Just one best friend pretending to ride another best friend’s dick,” I joke.
She blushes, and she presses her forehead to my chest, hiding her face as she giggles.
I rub her back a few times and let my fingers brush through her hair. It’s so long, almost down to her ass, and it’s all soft and silky. She hates her hair—like I said, girls hate everything about themselves sometimes—but I think it’s really pretty. It’s all big and wavy, but she flat irons it a lot because everyone else has flat hair and she says hers looks eighties by comparison. If it was eighties, which it’s not, it would be more Kelly LeBrock than Kelly Bundy. Classy hot.
“Will you come visit me next year? I know I’ll be all the way across the country and it’ll be a pain in the ass, but will you?” she sweetly asks as she rises up, putting one hand on either side of my shoulders.
“Probably.” I shrug. “It might be nice to get a change of scenery, get away from our parents and all this shit here.”
“I think so too,” she says, nodding. “I’ll be on my own, which means I’ll probably miss you a million times more, and it’ll be so fun if you come to campus and hang out with me.”
“Okay, then that’s what I’ll do. I mean, I only work, like, nine days a month, so I’ve got time.”
“Will you do it soon, like, right when I move into the dorms?” she eagerly asks.
I see an opportunity, and I can’t let it slip. “I don’t know,” I say, grinning. “That means I gotta book a flight pretty soon, I’ll have to fly for all those hours, and there’s check-in and those long-ass security lines. What’s in it for me?”
“My company,” she says, countering with a sly smile of her own. “And, you know, maybe some more of this,” she adds, looking down at her body pressed against me.
I chuckle, and I’m surprised when she sits up again and starts swiveling her hips in that sensual way that’s so hot.
“You mean you wouldn’t want to fuck around and do shit like this with me anymore?” she says, switching into that sexy Lola that I’ve only recently discovered below the surface of her sweetheart exterior. “I thought you liked being close to me like this. I like being close to you.”
I make an exaggerated growling sound, and I grab her hips and roll her over in one fast motion so I’m on top of her, pinning her to the bed with my pelvis.
“I like being close to you,” I say with a smart-ass smile. “Can’t you tell?” I rock up against her a few times.
>
“Jesus! It feels like a fucking tree branch!” she says with wide eyes.
I can’t be seductive if I’m laughing, and that totally makes me laugh, so I flop down on her and snicker.
She wraps her arms and legs around me like she’s hugging me with her whole body. It doesn’t feel sexual anymore; it just feels sweet. She’s holding me against her because she likes the feel of me against her, not because she wants to fuck me. In fact, I’m guessing she’d never really fuck me. This is all just a bit of fun for her. She always tells me how she’s “totally not sexy” and how she can’t be “so seductive like that” with guys, so I think this is her little way to experiment with it. It’s her outlet to try being a hot, irresistible siren for a change. She could seduce the fuck out of me any day of the week, but she has no idea that she could have that effect on all men.
“Do you think we should risk you staying in here tonight?” she whispers to me when I push up on my elbows. “I just really don’t want you to go. It’s your last night here, and I want to stay like this with you.”
“What about Theresa?” I ask her.
“I’ll set my clock for earlier so we can wake up first,” she offers.
She’s so cute, and her request is innocent and sweet. I run my nose along hers, and I get that feeling in the pit of my stomach that makes me want to kiss her, even though I know I can’t. It’s not that I want to shove my tongue down her throat or anything like that. I just want to kiss her lips a few times, just something soft and tender that reflects how I feel about her. She’s my little treasure, and she makes me want to be gentle and loving with her.
“Okay.” I nod to her after I look in her eyes for a few seconds. “I’ll stay here.”
“Yay!” She smiles, making sure to keep her happiness quiet.
I scoot down her body so I can lay my head low on her chest. I can hear her heartbeat, and it’s a very relaxing sound. She puts her arms around me, and she plays with my hair for a second or two. I have to bend my knees so I can still fit on the bed, but I like being on her like this. It doesn’t make me feel horny; it makes me feel warm and loved.
“Lo, you’ve been the greatest to me during all this bullshit with my parents. I’ll never forget that, baby. It means the world to me,” I whisper to her.
“I’d do it again a thousand times, James. It makes me feel good to know that I can comfort you and help you out in your time of need,” she softly answers. “You’re always there for me, always having my back whenever shit goes down, and I was glad I got the chance to do it for you and show you that I feel the same way about you as you do about me.”
I wonder if she feels exactly the same as I do. I’ve thought about fucking her a lot these past few days, and I’m seriously doubting that she feels that way too. Sure, we’ve fucked around and done little sexy shit with each other, but I’ve pictured some pretty lewd stuff, and even though she was pretending to be a little vixen just now, I don’t think she could even imagine the kind of shit that I’ve thought about doing with her.
I kiss her stomach at the bottom of her ribcage and roll off her, ushering her to come into my arms. She does, and I stroke her back as she rests her head on my chest.
“We’re always gonna have this, aren’t we, Lo?” I say, smiling to myself. “We’re always gonna be how we are, the way we care about each other so much and stuff.”
“Yep.” She nods, and I hear her little giggle.
I kiss her forehead, and then it’s time for both of us to get some sleep.
Morning comes way too soon for me because I know it means I have to leave. It’s early sunrise with that orange light coming in like it was the night after Lola’s prom. I’m holding her in my arms, and I never imagined I could enjoy being close to somebody this much.
She’s still asleep, and she looks like an angel. Her long eyelashes are resting on her cheeks, and her lips look all full and soft. Her hair is fanned out over the pillow in this way that would take hours to stage if this were a photo shoot.
There are still a few minutes before her alarm goes off, so I decide to wake her up so I can sneak back to the guest room and we can pretend that this whole sleeping-in-bed-together thing never happened once Theresa wakes up. I run my fingers really lightly up and down her arm, just barely touching her. She’s warm and smooth. Beautiful. After that, I brush her hair behind her ear and rub my thumb across her lips.
At that point, something comes over me, and I lose control for a second. I roll forward just a little, and I touch my lips to hers, but very, very softly so she won’t know I did it if she really is still asleep. This doesn’t count as a kiss; it’s only a little peck after all, but I can feel my heart flutter in my chest for the brief instant when my lips touch hers. I don’t know what it means. I’ve never had that happen before. Usually my heart only starts pumping when I’m making out with a girl and well on my way to getting in her pants, but I know that’s not what I want from Lola right now. These feelings confuse me.
She stirs a little, and I kiss her cheeks and her forehead. She stretches and slowly opens her eyes before giving me a big smile as she reaches up to me and touches her little palm to my cheek. I kiss the inside of her wrist and give her a wink, which makes her giggle. It’s such a heavenly sound—I swear to God, I think an angel just got its wings or something. She’s so cute and sweet and pure, and I find her outrageously beautiful right now.
“Good morning, Lo,” I whisper to her.
“Good morning, James.”
She smiles as she brushes my hair back, and I run my hand down her arm. I swear, I can feel her pulling me closer, and pretty soon, I’m leaning over her with part of my body pressed on top of her and the other half down on the bed.
Somehow—and I don’t know how I let it happen—I end up kissing her neck. She smells nice, and her skin is warm and smooth. She extends her neck a little and lets me keep going, which surprises me. This shit is rolling on, and there’s nothing I can do about it.
An instant later and I’m on top of her, kissing up and down the side of her throat while she bends her neck back and her legs come up at my sides.
“Mmm,” I hear her breathe as she tangles her fingers into my hair in this perfectly aggressive but adorable way.
My hand slides up under her T-shirt, but this time she doesn’t stop me. I feel the curve of her boob, and soon my fingertips make a little circle around her nipple. She moans. She fuckin’ moans! It’s amazingly hot, a really pretty, feminine sound, and I’m beyond psyched that she likes this.
I keep kissing her neck, and I feel her hips rock just a tiny bit, so I decide to move my hand down her body, and I feel her little stomach tremble when I slide my hand into her shorts. Her eyes are all sleepy, but I don’t think it’s from being tired. It’s that relaxed, super-turned-on look that I love to see on a girl’s face.
I just barely graze between her legs when the alarm goes off, turning on the local top-forty radio station.
“Shit,” she exhales and flops back on the bed.
“I hate that fuckin’ clock!” I sigh, which makes her giggle.
I’m bummed that I have to take my hand out of her shorts when I was so close being able to touch her there, but I know that I should. I sit up on the bed and look down at her on her pillow. She’s all hot and bothered. I can tell from the way her nipples are poking into her shirt. Her chest is moving up and down a little faster, too, and her lips are parted as she breathes. If only I had, like, three more minutes, the pleasures I could show this girl!
I swallow hard and stand up from the bed. She giggles when she can see the obvious effect she’s had on me.
“Totally your fault,” I whisper with a smirk.
“Sorry ’bout it!” she says in a playfully mocking tone.
I give her a wink, and then I slip out the door and back to the guest room, totally undetected by Theresa. The covert operation was a success, and I got to hold my little angel all night without starting some huge shitstorm at her h
ouse.
I’m out at my car with my keys in my hand. I have to leave. I have to leave Lola and go back to California, even though it’s going to damn near kill me to say goodbye to her.
“I’m sad that you’re going,” she admits with tender honesty.
“I’m sad too,” I reply.
“I miss you all the time, James,” she says, her voice trembling just a little bit.
I swallow hard. If she’s going to cry, I’m going to have a breakdown. I can’t handle it when Lola cries. When we were kids, her gerbil died and she started bawling. I had to be about eleven, but I remember giving her a big hug and crying too. It killed me to see her sad, and it was like I could feel her emotions myself. Jonathan, of course, called me a wuss and said it was just a gerbil and that me and Lola were total babies.
“It’s okay, Lo,” I whisper to her, holding her in my arms. She’s up on the curb, and I’m on the street, which gives her a few more inches, but she still feels tiny against me.
“Please promise me you’ll visit,” she says through sniffles.
“Of course I will,” I say.
I hold her head in my hands and wipe the tears off her cheeks with my thumbs. I can feel my throat tightening. I concentrate really hard on not crying.
“Don’t cry, Lo,” I whisper to her. “You’re gonna make me cry, and then we’ll both be a fuckin’ mess.”
She sniffles and gives me a little smile. There, that’s what I wanted. No more tears.
“I’ll be out there to see you before there’s even snow on the ground. Give me, like, six months and I’ll be knocking on the door of your dorm room, begging you to let me cuddle with you again,” I say optimistically.
“You can always cuddle with me, James,” she whispers to me in a way that was intended to be sweet, but instead comes off as super sexy.
“All right, kid—” I smile at her “—I gotta go.”
I take a look back at the house to see if Theresa is watching this borderline tearful goodbye, but she’s not peeking out the window anymore, so I give Lola a sneaky peck on the lips, and she gives me a naughty smile. This sexual chemistry we’ve been having is like a little secret just for us. Shit, it was a secret to us a few days ago!
Vice, Virtue & Video: Revealed (The Vice, Virtue & Video Series) Page 12
