Out Of The Dark
Page 1
Out of the Dark
Out of the Dark Trilogy
Book 1
By Arlene Gonzales
Out of the Dark
Copyright © 2016 by Arlene Gonzales.
All rights reserved.
First Print Edition: November 2016
Limitless Publishing, LLC
Kailua, HI 96734
www.limitlesspublishing.com
Formatting: Limitless Publishing
ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-873-6
ISBN-10: 1-68058-873-7
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.
Dedication
In loving memory of my son,
Erik Gonzales
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
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Chapter 1
“No!” I struggle and yell.
I can hear my parents pleading, their cries for mercy, the sound of my mother’s scream. My father calling out her name, and my brother yelling out my name. I can smell smoke.
“The boat is on fire!”
Then I hear the gunshots. The sound of each shot makes me jump, my heart is in my throat. I try to move, but my feet are like lead. In an instant he is grabbing me.
He tugs at my wrist and I start to tremble and tear up. I look into his eyes and see nothing but pure and utter evil. “How could you do this? You are a monster!”
“I told you, Alexis, I would never let you go. And anybody that tries to stand in my way of having you will be eliminated.”
I’m fighting him with everything I have, kicking him, biting him, trying to get out of his grip, but he is too strong and my knees are weak. My parents and my only brother have been murdered. I can’t breathe. My world is crashing down on me, and there is nothing I can do to stop it.
“No, stop! Let me go.” I struggle in his grasp. “Please, Frank, please let me go. If you have ever loved me, please let me go.”
He laughs. “Love? This isn’t about love anymore, babe, but nobody is going to make a fool out of me.”
Suddenly I’m awake, wishing it was really just a bad dream, but it’s not. Sobs wrack my body. They are dead—gone—never to return. I will never see them again. I will never tell my mom about the day I had. We will never again have a mother-daughter day, I will never be able to hear her humming a song while doing things around the house.
My brother Erik will never give me that shy smile again when walking into my room or even when I bust him doing something that we both know he shouldn’t, something I promise to take to the grave. But it is he who is in the grave now because of my stupid mistake. Erik was not only my big brother but he was also my best friend, my hero, the only man besides my father that I could count on. He never let me down, never lied to me, and always vowed that he would always protect me. And that was what he tried to do the night Frank killed them. Why didn’t I pay attention to him when he told me from the very beginning that he had a bad feeling about Frank, that there was something to him that didn’t sound right?
Why didn’t I listen to my dad when he told me I should take things slow and that one day I would meet Mr. Right?
My dad was the other hero in my life. I was Daddy’s little girl growing up, and he would always tell me that no matter how old I got I would forever be his little girl. Why didn’t I acknowledge that he knew what he was talking about when he said that I was too young to know the difference between Mr. Right and Mr. Right Now? I didn’t even hear my mother out, who had always guided me down the right path before. Why, why, why did I not listen to them? If I would have just opened my eyes and looked at him the way they did, my parents and my big brother would still be alive and my life would be normal.
I will never be able to sleep without having the nightmares. I will never be able to get through the day without feeling the guilt, without wishing he would have shot me as well, because living without them is not really living. I go through the motions of everyday life. And now no matter how much distance I put between myself and Seattle, no matter how hard I try to change things, my family is gone—murdered at the hands of my former boyfriend. Even though he is in prison now for the rest of his days, I will still feel the guilt for the rest of my life. They would still be alive if not for me. I would still have my parents. I would still have my brother.
I cry myself back to sleep.
***
Light enters the room and shines directly on my face; it’s morning. The door swings open and reveals my best friend since junior high, Shannon.
“Good morning, sleepyhead. Today’s the day!”
She sees my red, swollen eyes and knows right away that something is wrong. Shannon is the one person I can’t keep anything from. Everything there is to know about me, every little secret, she knows. Erik was my big brother, and yes, we shared secrets, but the things I couldn’t tell him, the girl stuff…that’s where Shannon came in. She was, and is, the sister I always wanted, the daughter my parents never had. You don’t have to be blood to be family. Sometimes you’re just lucky enough to find that one person you have a connection with from the very beginning, a complete understanding, and a bond that will stand the test of time. Even though you just met them it feels like you have known them your whole life. My person is Shannon Norman: my best friend, my sister, and the other half of my heart. She is the only family I have left. From the night my life came crashing down, through the whole trial, she sat with me in the courtroom every single day, holding my hand.
Trying her very best to offer comfort, she sits on the bed, looks right into my eyes, and hugs me. “I know this is hard, Lexie. I can’t imagine how I would have handled this whole ordeal.”
The tears start to fall again. I pull away and cover my face with my hands. I don’t know if I can do this. My head still throbs from the night before. Shannon pulls me in for another hug and cries with me.
Pushing a strand of hair behind my ear, she says, “You are stronger than you think, remember that”
Am I, Shannon? Because it doesn’t feel like that right now.
I don’t know if the move across the country will help.
Shannon takes my hand in hers. “You are going to do whatever it takes to get through this. I will be there with you as long as you need me. New York is a big place. You’ll be able to make a new life for yourself. It’s been two long, hard years since the murders, and now with the trial finally over, you can try to put your life back together again. Come out of the dark. Start to live again.”
We look at each other.
“I love you all the way around the world and back again, Shannon. Thank you for being there with me through it all.”
Oh, how I hate that name! Frank Lee, a part of my past, a person I wish I’d never met.
Shannon stands and holds her hand out to me. “Come on, today is moving day. The first day of your new life.”
I take her hand, get up, and give her a small smile.
I keep telling myself, one day at a time. We watch as they load all my stuff in the moving van and attach my car to the back of it. Before we know it the van is driving off and Shannon and I are on our way to the airport.
***
We land in New York City at LaGuardia Airport and hail a cab to the apartment that will be my new home. I’ve never been to New York before this, and I am quietly looking out my window, taking everything in. I have never seen so many taxi cabs before. They’re everywhere. On every street people wave, hailing them. When we arrive we exit the cab and let the driver know we won’t be long, since we can’t stay here until the furniture arrives in a couple of days.
I look up and down the street, take a deep breath, and let it out. The neighborhood is quiet; there are lines of trees on both sides of the street. The building is a brownstone.
Shannon takes my hand. “Come on, Lexie, let’s go see your new home.”
We do a walk-through. I have only seen a video of the apartment till now. The realtor sent me videos of several to choose from, and I chose this one even though it was the most expensive. I liked it because of the layout. The apartment is designed for roommates, as each bedroom has its own bathroom, perfect for two girls especially if one of them spends hours getting ready for whatever occasion. The apartment has hard wood floors throughout, I’ve always dreamed of having an island in the kitchen and this apartment gives me that. A big bay window drenches the living room with light. There is a lot of closet space, and with two girls living here that is definitely a plus. After finishing our walk-through, we end up back in the living room.
“The apartment is perfect,” Shannon says, “but why did you get a two bedroom?”
I blush, shrug my shoulders, and give her a little grin. “I was hoping that maybe it would be yours when you visit, or even if you decide to stay here with me on a permanent basis.”
As she turns to look out the bay window, she says, “You never know.”
Getting back into the cab, we tell the driver Waldorf Astoria, please. I would have chosen a less expensive hotel, but Shannon insisted that this was the only place to stay. She put it something like, “Lexie, you can’t go to New York City and not sleep at the Waldorf.” She also insisted that the stay would be her treat.
The couple of days we stay there, she books us the complete spa treatment from a massage to a facial, a manicure, and of course a pedicure. We even have a mud bath, which feels kind of weird. I’ve agreed to the whole spa treatment, but on the condition that it will be my treat since she’s paying for the room. We also take in a Broadway show and do some shopping, which is Shannon’s favorite pastime.
I have never spent so much in one week before in my whole life. I was always raised to save for a rainy day, to be frugal with my earnings. Yes, even though I can afford it now because I have the money from the sale of the house, plus the life insurance from both my parents and my brother, I’m still uncomfortable spending so much. Shannon keeps telling me that I deserve to be happy again, that my parents and my brother would expect me to move forward. That they would want me to live on, and not always be crying. She says, “Your family can’t rest in peace if you’re miserable.”
I have to admit I’m starting to feel like I can breathe again, but then at night I pray, and ask God to make sure that my mom, dad, and brother all know how much I miss and love them. That’s when the tears start again, when the anger surfaces, when the feeling of guilt engulfs me.
The nights are the worst, when everything is quiet, when I can hear my thoughts—I swear I can actually hear my heartbeat slow down. The day will come when I’ll be better, that there will be a night when I won’t cry myself to sleep. I know it because my mom came to me in a dream once, and told me that I will smile with my whole heart again. That there will come a time when I feel love again, and be able to feel happiness when I speak of them.
I don’t know how true that is; I guess time will tell.
Chapter 2
It’s been three weeks since we unpacked and settled in, and we haven’t talked about Shannon staying here to live again. I’ve had a couple of interviews, but there is only one job I’m really interested in, the Harlow Talent Agency on Lenox Hill in the Kingston Towers. I’m still waiting for their call.
Friday evening approaches and we decide on ordering a pizza for movie night. We’re going to watch our favorite movie, Thelma and Louise, because that’s who we are. I’m Thelma, and Shannon is Louise. I grab us a couple of beers, and we relax, eat, talk, and laugh. It feels good to laugh again, and for the first time I am starting to feel at ease. Maybe, just maybe, my mom was right. One day I will be able to speak about them and still smile.
My phone rings. I answer, “Hello.”
A female voice says, “Good evening, may I speak to Alexis Moore?”
“This is she.”
“Ms. Moore, I am Julie Shaw, an assistant to Michael Harlow. He would like to know if you are still interested in the position that you applied for with The Harlow Talent Agency.”
Feeling rapid heartbeats and with my stomach doing backflips, I silently tell myself to sound as calm as possible. “Yes…yes, I am.”
“Good. Can you start on Monday?”
“S-s-sure…I mean, yes, yes, I can.”
“Great! You know the pay scale and the hours?”
“Yes, we discussed them in the interview.”
“See you Monday morning at eight o’clock.”
I hit the end button and give myself a shout-out while doing a little dance.
Shannon looks at me all smiles. “I take it that was good news.”
“I got the job at the Harlow Talent Agency.”
She stands up. “Well, we need to go shopping in the morning. You need a new wardrobe.”
“Shannon, you will use any excuse to go shopping. You are a shopaholic.”
She looks at me as if I just wounded her, but I know better. “Maybe, but isn’t that why they invented malls and credit cards?”
We hug and jump around for a minute, then sit back down to finish the movie. I tell her we’ll need to go first thing in the morning, because I also want to map out a route to work. We don’t live far from Lenox Hill, but I still need to know how long it will take to get there. After we finish with our shopping spree that seems to take the better part of the day, I go to my laptop and put in the address of the building: E. 66th St. after getting directions from my apartment on Lexington Ave., I put on my sneakers and set out to walk the route. I find out how long it will take to get there, which is about twenty minutes if I choose to walk, but is longer if I take a cab, as the traffic is horrible. I make my way back home before it gets too late. Shannon has brought what seems like enough clothes for two people.
The rest of the weekend goes by.
***
Monday morning I am so excited I wake up before the alarm goes off. I head into the bathroom to take my shower. I feel like a kid on their first day of school. As I’m drying my hair, I remember what my mother once told me. Alexis, when you get your first job it will be one of the biggest thrills of your life, working to make your own place in the world.
“My first job,” I say to myself. Before this I was a student in college, living at home. I had planned on becoming gainfully employed right after graduation, but everything changed the night Frank murdered my family. So now here I am, twenty-three and my very first job. “Oh, Mom, I wish you were here.” I can’t cry, not now. I need to brush out my hair before it dries like this. In the past I had thought of cutting my hair, but my mom would never let me. She loved to comb it out and
tell me stories of how I had the same long, wavy blonde locks her mother had. Thinking back, those were some of the best times ever, our mother, daughter bonding days. Looking in the mirror, I can’t decide if this is the right outfit. I knew I should have picked out a different outfit for my first day when we went on our shopping spree. There’s no doubt that Shannon is still asleep but I also know that she would want to give me advice. “Hey, Shannon, can you come in here and help me?”
She walks in, rubbing her eyes and yawning. “Okay, let me see what we can do with you…”
When she finishes my hair and makeup, I stand in front of mirror. “You never stop amazing me, Shannon.”
Giving me the once over, she says, “There, now you are sure to impress—what’s his name again? Oh yes, Mr. Harlow.”
In all reality, even though Shannon understands I couldn’t stay in Seattle any longer, I know she secretly wished that I would somehow change my mind and go back with her. Ever since we first met in middle school, I always could rely on Shannon no matter what the situation. No matter what was going on or what I needed, she was always there for me, and I feel really bad that I can’t live in our hometown with her. My gut told me that if I did it would have slowly eaten away at me and eventually torn at my heart. Frank had taken away my family, and I just couldn’t let him take my soul as well.
I give her a look and say, “I know you wanted me to work back home, but I’m really glad you came to help me set up my new apartment. I couldn’t have done this without you.” I squeeze her hand, trying to reassure her that we’ll always be there for each other. “Listen here, Shannon Norman, you have been my best friend since middle school—hell, you’re not just my best friend, you’re my sister in every way that counts. So you are not going to get rid of me that easily. We can visit each other, we can talk on the phone, we can Skype, we can email and text. You can also decide to stay here with me on a permanent basis. I do have an extra bedroom that you’re already using. Just think about it, okay?”