Love Inspired Historical November 2015

by Linda Ford

  Doubts clung to his resolve like cobwebs. He didn’t want her regrets turning into resentment. “And what is it you expect of me?”

  Her eyes glittered and he unconsciously took her hand once more. She squeezed his fingers. “I don’t want to be afraid anymore. We barely know one another, but you make me feel safe. I haven’t felt that way in a very, very long time.”

  As though the confession had cost her, all the fight drained out of her.

  His determination crystallized. He tucked two fingers beneath her chin and gently forced her to meet his steady gaze. “I’ll keep you safe, I promise.”

  Her lovely, expressive eyes wreaked havoc with his senses. She should have been nestled safely away in a warm house, with someone looking out for her. He could do that much for her at least.

  The weather outside gave him an idea. From now until Christmas he’d give her plenty of space. That way, if she eventually decided they didn’t suit and she wanted to leave him, she wouldn’t feel beholden.

  He doubted she expected anything different. She’d wanted only safety.

  Safety…the one thing he could offer her. He only hoped that would be enough for a lifetime, because that was all he had to give.

  Chapter Six

  “You look like a tea person. Am I right?” JoBeth McCoy, the marshal’s wife, squinted at Tessa.

  Tessa waved away the tin. “Tea is far too extravagant.”

  Everything was moving at a wonderfully brisk pace—the preparations, the wedding, even Jo’s rapid-fire speech. Tessa hadn’t gathered a breath since she’d agreed on marrying Shane within the hour. Things were definitely different out West, as she was quickly learning. Without batting an eye, Shane’s family had sprung into action. They hadn’t seemed shocked by the announcement at all.

  Cora had even winked. Winked. She’d deliberately dropped those hints about marriage. Although someone should tell the poor girl that Shane was oblivious to hints. Tessa sighed inwardly. The whole town had clearly been trying to marry off the widower, and Tessa was, as Cora had so bluntly stated, the only new single woman in town in ages. They’d obviously exhausted all the other possibilities.

  Ignoring her refusal of the tea, Jo stuffed the tin into the crate before the counter. “Never underestimate the edifying powers of small luxuries.”

  A twinge of guilt nagged Tessa. She should have waited out the weather, given Shane more time. Except whenever he was near, the heavy weight on her chest eased. For the first time since she’d parted ways from Emmett, she felt as though she could take a full breath. The sensation was heady, intoxicating.

  She’d give their relationship until Christmas to take hold. If Shane was still indifferent to her by then, she’d reassess the situation. Although she didn’t plan on giving him any reason to be indifferent.

  She’d be a good wife, a good mother. She was a quick learner, and she’d figure things out along the way. “Never mind the tea. Tea is a waste of money.”

  “You’ll thank me later.” The dark-haired woman gestured out the window. “We don’t have much time. The boys are meeting us at the church in twenty minutes. I’m guessing you won’t be back in town for another few weeks. Maybe a month. Better be quick about your purchases.”

  “I don’t even know where to begin.” The boxes and cans blurred together in one overwhelming mass.

  While she’d taken care of all the purchases with Emmett, she’d never taken care of little ones before. “I’m not certain what I’ll need. What the children will need.”

  “That’s why I’m here,” Jo said brusquely. “Why don’t you pick out a nice shawl? Something special for the wedding since there isn’t time to change.”

  She steered Tessa toward an out-of-the-way display of fabrics and continued shopping. Tessa grimaced. Clearly Jo didn’t want or need her help. Probably for the best—she was only slowing down the process. Though she hadn’t lied about her resolve before, she was still adjusting to the abrupt change. The inclement weather had sent everyone into a flurry of activity that left her little time to think.

  The preacher had been fetched, Shane had ordered the horses hitched and the marshal had returned home for the twins’ belongings. The bustle hadn’t given her any chance for second thoughts or regrets. She only hoped Shane felt the same. The intense look on his face had worried her.

  A book caught her attention and she touched the faded cover. Bartleby’s Encyclopedia of Household Management. On impulse, she snatched the heavy volume and added it to her purchases. If Bartleby had written that tome, he must know a whole lot more about household management than she did. Caring for her and Emmett was one thing, but she had two children counting on her as well.

  A gust of snowflakes and a blast of frigid air signaled the arrival of another customer. Marshal Cain appeared, his hat dusted with snow.

  He shook off the flakes and grinned. “The wagon is hitched, the kids are packed and Shane is waiting at the church. How are you two doing?”

  “Almost ready,” Jo said brusquely. “Walk Tessa over and I’ll join you in a tick.”

  Her nerves drew taut and Tessa hesitated. “I should stay and help.”

  Jo marched over, carrying a heap of crocheted items crafted in a cheerful emerald green. “You’ll need these as well. Mrs. Edwards makes the warmest hats and mittens. That piece of felt you’re wearing won’t offer much protection in this weather.”

  Touching the brim of her sad little bonnet, Tessa acknowledged the thin material. “It was the warmest hat I own.”

  Her winter wardrobe had been designed for a brisk walk from a train station to a hotel or a quick scamper across a crowded street. She’d never had to choose clothing for anything more rigorous than a short dash.

  “Don’t worry.” Jo filled her arms with the woolens. “You’ll be fine. I’ll take care of everything.”

  “Are you certain?” Tessa asked, hoping they hadn’t caught the wobble in her voice.

  The marshal drew his wife into his arms and kissed her forehead, then turned toward Tessa. “Leave the supplies to Jo. She knows what you’ll need better than anyone.”

  At their affectionate display, Tessa stifled a sigh. How she missed the warmth of companionship. She’d always considered herself independent. These past few months had taught her the difference between independence and solitude.

  With a resolute nod, Tessa wrapped the emerald green scarf around her throat and replaced her felt bonnet with her new cap.

  A young boy hovering over the penny candy caught her attention. Tessa snapped her fingers and the boy cast a guilty look over his shoulder. The temptation of the penny candy was no match for the sight of the marshal’s tall figure by her side. The boy stuffed his hands in his pockets and scurried away.

  The marshal frowned down at her. “What was that all about?”

  “Saving him from himself, that’s all. Everyone needs a reminder about right and wrong now and again.” Although some people clearly never got the message. “It’s best to turn them young, before they can get into any real trouble.”

  Before they became caught up in the thrill of danger and lost sight of good and bad altogether.

  “Ah, sticky fingers.” The marshal nodded sagely. “I’ll keep my eye on him.”

  She’d recognized the boy’s look well enough. She’d seen the slightly glazed longing on Emmett’s face plenty of times. Over the years she’d gradually realized he loved the game more than the prize. Why he couldn’t receive that same thrill from an honest day’s work, she’d never know. Life would have been so much simpler for everyone.

  As she reached for the door, Jo called out. Tessa whirled around.

  “Take this.” Jo thrust a cinnamon-colored silk scarf into her outstretched hands. “Something new. We’ll figure out the old, borrowed and blue later.”

  Tessa touched the collar of her dress. “This will serve as something old. And if the temperature drops any lower, my lips will serve as the blue.”

  “You look lovely.�
� Jo squeezed Tessa’s shoulders. “Stop worrying.”

  “I’m not worried.” That was mostly the truth. She wasn’t worried, more like uncertain. While she didn’t regret her decision, she feared the unknown. “Thank you. For everything.”

  Her chin trembled and she clenched her jaw. The only opinions Emmett had ever trusted were those of babies and animals. He always said that children and beasts saw the true heart of people and not what was falsely presented on the outside. She’d seen Shane with his children; she’d seen how they adored him. He was an honorable man. Except she wasn’t drawn to him only because he was a good man. Her decision was based on far more than his fatherly abilities.

  There was a spark between them. She ticked off her self-imposed time frame in her head. She had until Christmas to fan that spark into something beyond companionship. Surely by then the Fulton brothers would have given up on her as well.

  The more time they spent together, the more her past would recede. She’d watch it fade into the distance like a departing train. Would Shane do the same? His affection for his first wife obviously ran deep. Could he ever feel that same affection for her?

  Jo flipped the dark hair from her forehead. “A few jitters are normal. If this is something more, only say the word. We’ll put a stop to this whole event at once.”

  Though she’d known Jo only a short time, Tessa didn’t doubt her words. “No, no. It’s not that.”

  “You’ll do well together.” Jo placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Take good care of him.”

  “What if I can’t?” she asked in a ragged whisper.

  Tessa was grateful when the marshal moved away and studied a display of tinned milk, giving them a moment of privacy.

  “You can.” Bending her head, Jo spoke quietly. “Be patient with Shane. He’s had a rough time these past few years. It’s not my place to say, but I don’t think life with Abby was easy.”

  Tessa grasped for an appropriate response, but the marshal interrupted her reply. She had so many questions and yet she feared the answers.

  “We’d better go,” the marshal said. “This weather isn’t letting up, and Shane will be waiting.”

  With a last glance at the heap of purchases piling up on the counter, Tessa followed him into the frigid afternoon. She sure hoped Shane wasn’t angry about all the money she’d spent. She hated starting off their marriage on a bad note. Up until this point, saving money had consisted of what she’d managed to squirrel away beneath her mattress. The only budgeting she’d done had been hiding the surplus from Emmett—his taste ran to the expensive. Life with her father had been a series of ups and downs. He spent money freely when they were flush, and Tessa economized when they weren’t.

  After stepping outside, the marshal held out his hand. “It’s slippery. Be careful.”

  Clutching his arm, she ducked her head against the howling wind. Snowflakes blurred her vision and she blindly followed his lead. The cold whipped at her legs and a sharp, stinging gust brought tears to her eyes. By the time the marshal escorted her into the warmth of the church, her toes had gone numb. They shuffled into a small vestibule brightened with twin glass lanterns.

  The marshal gestured toward his right. “There’s a room over there where you can hang up your coat.”

  The cramped office space was overflowing with books. They were stacked and stuffed on every available space. Considering the variety of subjects, she wondered if the collection served as a sort of library for the town. Cautiously navigating the clutter, she removed her coat and cap and smoothed her hair. Standing on her tiptoes, she checked her reflection in an oval mirror perched on a shelf. At least the wind had whipped some color into her cheeks. She brushed at her skirts before abandoning the effort. The scarf Jo had chosen added a bit of elegance to her outfit.

  A soft knock sounded at the door, and Tessa greeted a kindly gray-haired man with pale blue eyes.

  “I’m Reverend Miller,” he introduced himself with an outstretched hand.

  She clasped his fingers in greeting. “Tessa Spencer.”

  “Are you settling in all right? Is there anything I can get you?”

  “I’m fine. Thank you for asking. I appreciate your help on such, um, on such short notice.”

  He offered a gentle smile. “You have to be ready for anything in this neck of the woods.”

  “I’m learning that.”

  He studied her face and she resisted the desire to squirm beneath his piercing scrutiny. After a moment he nodded, as though coming to a decision.

  He reached for the door and hesitated. “Shane is a good man.”

  How many people had said the same? She hoped she was worthy of him. “I know.”

  He expelled his breath in an audible rush. “I’ll see you inside, then. Welcome to Cimarron Springs, Miss Spencer.”

  Feeling as though she’d passed some sort of test, Tessa followed him out the door. The marshal was patiently waiting for her. He’d removed his hat and heavy coat and his hair had obviously been finger combed into place. While she appreciated his solicitous behavior, she hadn’t had a moment alone since they’d set the wedding into motion. She felt as though she was under scrutiny, and any moment they’d discover a flaw.

  “Shane is inside with Cora and the children,” Marshal Garrett said. “Jo will be here any minute. We’ll start the ceremony then.”

  “All right.” She tucked a lock of hair behind one ear. “Thank you for helping to arrange everything.”

  He nodded. “Life can be tough out here. If you need anything, Jo and I are close.”

  Feeling a fraud, she stared at the plank wood floor. “You’re all being so kind.”

  They were all loyal to Shane, and she didn’t know if she deserved their kindness. When she’d imagined the marriage, she’d pictured the isolated ranch. She hadn’t given much thought to Shane’s friends and family. What did they think of her? Were they worried?

  The marshal circled the brim of his hat with his fingers. “Shane is a grown man. He knows what he’s doing.”

  While his words didn’t exactly put her at ease, she appreciated his honesty.

  “Since your father isn’t here,” the marshal continued, “I was wondering if I could have the honor of walking you down the aisle.”

  Tessa touched her locket and swallowed around the lump in her throat. “Thank you. I’d like that.”

  The familiar ache took hold once more. Emmett would have enjoyed playing the father of the bride. He had a way of attracting a party even when there was nothing to celebrate. He’d have enjoyed her wedding if only for a new audience to regale with his stories.

  Though wary of the lawman, she appreciated his thoughtfulness. She’d listened as the other girls at the Harvey House had waxed poetic about their future wedding days, but she’d never joined in the game. She’d never been one for daydreaming.

  The marshal checked his watch and rocked back on his heels. “I did a lot of traveling before I settled in Cimarron Springs. Met a lot of people in that time.”

  “I imagine your job was very exciting,” Tessa offered.

  While she preferred the silence, she supposed he thought small talk might pass the time. She glanced over her shoulder. What was taking Jo so long?

  The marshal shrugged. “Sometimes it was exciting. Sometimes not. The thing about traveling is that you meet all kinds of folks. I met a fellow named Spencer once. I think his first name was Earl or Edgar or something.”

  He knew. Tessa jerked her head up and sucked in a sharp, frightened breath. Why else would he mention the name? She searched his face for any sign of condemnation and found none. Pressing her hand against her racing heart, she masked her expression. Perhaps it was a coincidence. There was no reason to assume he knew about her father. Or her.

  “Spencer is a common name.” She kept her reply deliberately vague and her voice dispassionate.

  “I’ll never forget him.” The marshal rubbed his chin and gazed at the door. “Craziest thing I
ever saw. There was a poker game in the saloon and old Frank was in deep to this stranger named Spencer. Frank was a known drinker and a known gambler, but he also had three children and a wife at home, so the regulars had a gentleman’s agreement. They steered clear of Frank when he got wound up that way. Only Spencer wasn’t exactly obliged to honor that agreement.”

  “I suppose not.”

  Her legs grew wobbly and she locked her knees. The story sounded all too familiar. He was almost certainly speaking of Emmett.

  Voices sounded from deep in the church and she started. Had the marshal orchestrated a delay to expose her? Why was he toying with her? If he planned on revealing her past before Shane, she wished he’d speed up the story. Or was he simply baiting her? While she hadn’t pegged the marshal as a blackmailer, she didn’t know him well enough to decipher his motivation.

  The marshal gave a slow shake of his head. “By the time I got to the saloon, poor Frank had gambled away all his money. Frank was desperate. The very next deal of the cards, he bet the deed to his farm. Now, I might have been the law in that town, but a game is a game and I had no right to interfere. Near broke my heart when Frank lost his home to Spencer. I’ve never seen a man look like that before, like he’d lost his spirit.”

  Tessa took a cautious step toward the door. She wasn’t certain where this story was leading, and she had a bad feeling about the ending. Either way, she was hedging her own bets this time. “Gambling is a wicked addiction.”

  “Most of the regulars lit out real quick. No one likes to see a man like that, trounced. I stayed behind, worried about Frank’s state of mind. Spencer stayed behind as well.” The marshal scratched his temple. “Spencer waited until it was just us three, then handed Frank back the note for the deed and all but twenty dollars of his winnings. Old Frank was blubbering and crying like a baby. Spencer said, Some lessons you gotta learn the hard way. Those words, they stuck with me.”