Until the Stars Fall From the Sky

by Mary Crawford

  Kiera blushes beet red and she stammers, “Thank you, your Honor.”

  The Judge chuckles and continues, “The paperwork seems complete and Mr. Whitaker has been through the process before. Since he is currently employed and has glowing recommendations from both his current employer and his past employer on file, I’m inclined to waive the home study requirement for two months given the exigent circumstances of this case and the fact that he has passed with flying colors every time he has been evaluated. I am concerned about what you drive though, Mr. Whitaker. Have you and Ms. Ashley worked out a way to share the minivan?”

  I clear my throat before I speak into the microphone at the counsel’s table, “No, your Honor. I just received a scholarship, freeing some of my finances for a more appropriate kid-friendly vehicle. I hope to have it by next week.”

  “Very good Mr. Whitaker,” she comments. “Is there anything else I need to consider before making my final decision?”

  Our attorney cued up the computer to a simple Power Point presentation that outlined our academic and professional accomplishments. I was surprised to see the video of me changing Becca’s diaper embedded in the presentation. Of course, I remember the pus filled, bleeding blisters and her soaked clothes. I don’t remember singing nonsensical songs or dancing until she fell asleep against my shoulder. The video transitions to hospital footage of Kiera holding Becca close to her breast as she fed her a bottle. She was swaying gently and crooning softly. I was standing behind her massaging her neck.

  The slide changed again. This time the star was Mindy. First, was the store surveillance video showing Mindy’s tackling greeting of Kiera. Next, was the makeover scene in the hospital, followed by our impromptu pizza and popcorn party where I made up several extra verses to Wheels on the Bus because Mindy was trying to postpone bedtime. The slide changed once more and cut to me reading Mindy Good Night Moon. As I finished, Mindy candidly said, “I wish you and Miss Kiera could be my dad and mom. I’m not ascared and hungry when you’re here. I like you.” The video faded to black and the courtroom lights came back up.

  At first, I’m embarrassed by my raw emotional state, but as I glance around the room, I realize I am not the only one affected. Denny is so disturbed by what he has seen that he has to leave the courtroom. Kiera is wiping tears from the corners of her eyes. Even the bailiff is dabbing away some tears with a well-worn tissue. Judge Thomlinson clears her throat lightly, “Sometimes big fancy words and lengthy explanations are not helpful and this is one of them. Mindy has made her feelings clear and, in her own way, so has Rebecca. Since these kids have clearly been abandoned and no family has been located to care for them during the past few months, I am inclined to make this order for the term of six months to guarantee that the girls have some stability over the holidays. They will remain wards of the state so that they remain covered by insurance and you will get a stipend to help offset the cost of caring for them. I will reevaluate everything then. Any questions?”

  No one in the gallery moved a muscle except to shake our heads. “It is so ordered. Welcome to the world of foster parenting, Ms. Ashley and Mr. Whitaker. I must say, you guys look like naturals.

  “Thank you, your Honor,” we reply in unison.

  ~*~

  An hour and a half later Kiera and Mindy are sitting on Mindy’s bed making silly faces while they suck thick milk shakes through straws. They are using Kiera’s cell phone to take goofy pictures of each other. I’ve got the back of Becca’s head cradled in the palm of my hand with her body draped across my forearm. I’m gently lifting her up and down as if I’m doing forearm curls and softly bouncing my knee. Apparently, this is more fun than Becca has had in quite some time because her little fists are flailing around quite rapidly and she is sporting a toothless, gummy grin.

  I start to blow raspberries on her toes when I become aware of the fact that the room is now engulfed in total silence. I look around and discover that Kiera and Mindy are studying me as if I’ve escaped from some weird science experiment run amuck. Mindy is tugging on Kiera’s sleeve as she points to me and says, “Look at that Miss Kiera, Becca’s smilin’! I ain’t never seen her do that before. She don’t have no teeths. Jus’ like me.” She points to the spot where her two upper teeth are missing.

  Kiera takes a picture of Becca and me. Becca’s bottom lip starts to tremble because I stopped moving. I stand up and start to pace the floor. Kiera regards me and makes a request. “Can you please sit in one spot when you comfort her, because I don’t want her to get used to people pacing with her when I’m unable to do the same.”

  Immediately, I sit down because the request makes perfect sense. “Of course, I respond. I wasn’t even thinking — ‘’

  “Mr. Jeff?” Mindy’s soft voice interrupts, “Did my mom and Nana get lost? I heard the nurse call ‘em and leave ‘em a message that I was in the hop-spital, but they’re not here yet.”

  My eyes flew to Kiera’s above Mindy’s head as I silently pled for help. Kiera gave me an encouraging smile and nod. So, I proceed with caution. “Mindy, do you remember the other day when we were talking about the fact that sometimes people make really stupid decisions?”

  Mindy nods and sticks her thumb in her mouth and starts twirling her hair around her fingers.

  I take a deep breath and continue, knowing that the rest of what I have to say can make or break the rest of our relationship. “It seems that your dad got out of jail early, so your mom and grandma got a little overexcited and confused about the news and decided to run away. Since you were sick and in the hospital, they thought it would be safer for you to stay here,” I explain.

  Mindy shakes her head sadly as she replies, “It’s okay, Mr. Jeff, I’m a big girl. I’m already six years old. I know about the red ebiction papers that mommy got because she was sellin’ drugs. I just figured that she would take Becca with her since Becca is still a baby and she loves babies more’n me.”

  Of all the things that I had anticipated that Mindy might say, this was not even in the realm of possibilities. I raise my eyes and meet Mindy’s gaze directly as I reply, “Mindy, sweetheart, I’m sorry that the grown-ups in your life made you worry about things that you should have never, ever been concerned with as a kid. Unfortunately, it seems like your mom, dad and Nana made some really bad choices that hurt you and your sister.” I pause to take a deep breath and to gather my thoughts so that I can best frame the second portion of our news when Kiera steps in to rescue me.

  “Mindy, the good news is that you are safe. Becca and you are going to come live at my house with Jeff and me until at least spring break. Did I tell you that Jeff has a big dog?” Kiera says with a big smile as she hugs Mindy.

  Mindy looks back and forth between us with a great deal of suspicion. “This is for reals?” she demands. “You guys ain’t trickin’ me? I thought you guys were friends. How’s come you’re living together?”

  Just then, Kiera’s dad appears in the doorway, laden with items from a local shopping mall. “Yeah, I’d kinda like to hear the answer to that question too.” He sets the bags down on the table and leans down to kiss Kiera on the forehead as he turns to face Mindy. “Hi Pumpkin, I’m Kiera’s daddy, which makes me your foster grandpa, but you can call me Papa,” he offers as he extends his hand for her to shake.

  Mindy delicately takes his big paw and shakes his fingertips, her brow wrinkles as she says, “I’ve never had a Papa before, but I think it’s a good thing.”

  Denny walks over to one of the bags and fishes out a gift bag and hands it to Mindy as he laughs and replies, “Oh, Pumpkin, something tells me you’re gonna like having a Papa very, very much.”

  Mindy pulls out an item from the gift bag with extreme care, which is very odd for me to see. Every other child that I have ever seen open a present does it with wild abandon. It’s almost as if she is afraid to even crease the crêpe paper. Finally, she reaches the present inside, and shrieks with delight, “Look, Miss Kiera. It’s a Barbie that look
s just like me! It even has blonde, curly hair with ribbons in it.” Mindy’s voice drops down to a hush as she notices the back of the doll. “It has fairy wings. That means it’s magic,” she whispers.

  Mindy throws back the covers, hops out of bed and launches herself at Denny. She hugs him tightly around the knees as she says, “Thank you Papa. It’s so special, just like the doll you gave Miss Kiera when she was little.”

  I can see that Denny’s eyes have misted over a bit. His speech is a little rough as he replies, “You’re welcome, Pumpkin. But, you left something in the bag.”

  Mindy dashes back over to the bed and removes a small bundle of tissue. Inside the tissue is a small baby doll wearing a purple diaper resting on a lily pad with fairy wings sprouting from her back. The whole thing is smaller than a baseball.

  Mindy grins up at Denny, as she explains, “I get it Papa. This is Magic Fairy Princess Barbie’s little sister and she has to watch out for her and keep her safe. Jus’ like I have to watch out for Becca.”

  Denny gets a very serious expression on his face as he ponders the statement. He nods sagely and answers, “Well, I suppose so. But, there are a lot more people in the kingdom to help out Princess Barbie, so she doesn’t have to help Princess Becca alone anymore. She has plenty of adults around to handle the scary stuff. So, Princess Barbie can focus on just being a kid.”

  Mindy yawns and stretches as she mumbles, “That’s good, because Princess Mindy. I mean, Princess Barbie was getting tired of being the grown up all the time.”

  I notice that Mindy’s eyes are getting very heavy. “Hey Mindy, go brush your teeth and I’ll tuck you into bed,” I prompt gently.

  “Mr. Jeff?” Mindy whispers softly. “Is it okay if I skip my prayers tonight? Because God answered all my prayers last night.”

  I am completely leveled by the simple faith of a six-year-old. I swallow hard as I answer, “I’m sure God wouldn’t mind; but, he might appreciate a thank you prayer.”

  Mindy’s brow furrowed as she replied, “I don’t know. It was a really big wish. A thank you prayer might not be enough. I might have to draw a picture and a note. I wonder how I get a picture to God.”

  “My mom delivers flowers to a church and they have a special box for prayer requests. What if we put your note in the prayer request box? Does that sound like a good idea?” I suggest.

  Mindy smothers another yawn. “I’ve got one more question for you, and then it’s time for you to go to bed after you brush your teeth. What color would you like us to paint your new bedroom?” I inquire, expecting a wildly creative answer.

  “You mean I get to choose?” Mindy asks, incredulous at the possibility. “Umm, I like stars and dragonflies and fairies,” she answers, listing them off on her fingers as she goes.

  “Mindy, I’m not sure that will get all that done right away. So for now, what are your favorite colors?” I caution, not wanting to set the bar too high.

  “I like purple and green — like the forest,” she replies, “but, I really like pink too.”

  I chuckle at her answer. My mother is going to get along with her famously. “That sounds beautiful,” I declare. “Now what color should we decorate Becca’s nursery?”

  “I think it should be lellow with daisies and teddy bears with those wishy flowers – you know the ones you blow on for good luck,” Mindy replies.

  “Do you mean yellow with dandelions?” I clarify.

  Mindy nods and rolls her eyes as she says, “Yes, I said lellow with wishy flowers. I want an old-fashioned looking teddy bear, not the cartoony one, please.”

  I help Mindy put toothpaste on her toothbrush and supervise as she brushes her teeth. I take a minute to brush out her hair to remove the tangles. “Do you want me to braid this or leave it loose? I ask.

  “Can you braid it, please? It hurts when I lay on it funny,” Mindy answers.

  “Sure thing, sweetheart,” I answer. Perhaps there’s a reason that I spent so much time practicing a silly skill like hair braiding as a child. Who knew it was going to play such a key role in my life as an adult?

  Chapter 22: Kiera

  As I finish snapping Becca’s onesie, I study her carefully. Although her diaper rash is much improved, she is still very thin with little subcutaneous fat. It is an odd look for a baby. The pediatrician is very concerned about whether the girls’ chronic dehydration has done lasting damage to their kidneys, so he wants to monitor them for a couple more days. If all goes well, the girls will be able to come home on Sunday. Although everyone has been providing excellent care, just the smell of a hospital brings back difficult memories for me and I can’t wait for the girls to be home.

  I carefully tuck Becca into the soft cloth front carrier and tuck a blanket around her. This system allows me to carry her and still have my hands free to push my chair, so it works well. I’m still not certain how I’m going to reach down into the crib when she outgrows the co-sleeper. Maybe I’ll ask my dad to see what he can work up in his workshop.

  I go into the little kitchenette to warm Becca’s bottle, only to find my dad stirring his coffee. My dad glances at the bottle and asks, “Is it one of those bottles with plastic liners?”

  I nod, gently rocking Becca, popping my chair back on two wheels to make the motion easier.

  “Good. That’s what we used with you. The safest way to warm it is in a bowl of hot water. Nuking it can give you hot spots,” he says, turning to me, “I’ll get that, you seem to have your hands full at the moment.”

  My dad boils some water in a bowl in the microwave. He lays out some clean paper towels on the counter as he unscrews the nipples, dips them in the scalding water, and then puts them on the paper towels to dry. He puts the sealed bag of formula into the hot water and says, “About three minutes should do it.” After following his instructions to the letter, I’m hoping that it works. I wonder if I’ll ever have it down to a science like my dad.

  “Ah, ah,” he cautions, “always test on your wrist first. It can get too hot.”

  I test it and it seems fine to me. I wheel us over to the table in the corner and start to feed her. Becca weaves her tiny arm under my arm and rests her head against my breast as she nurses sleepily from her bottle. Soon, her little mouth is slack around the bottle and she has milk dripping down her chin. I gently lift her to my shoulder to burp her and she complies like a champ.

  My dad snickers loudly then covers his mouth to muffle the noise. “Sorry, but this little Peanut reminds me of you when you were a baby. You used to burp loud enough to put my trucker buddies to shame and your poop could clear a room,” he reminisces with a chuckle.

  “Daddy!” I exclaim in a horrified whisper. “Promise me you won’t be sharing these little gems with Jeff.”

  “I will do no such thing,” my dad teases. “That kind of information is a valuable commodity. Speaking of Jeff, what are your plans with that young man?”

  “I don’t know Daddy,” I answer as I hug Becca tight and gently rock her. “Part of me wants to believe in the fairytale and throw caution to the wind and marry him tomorrow. The more realistic side of me knows it’s way too soon for all that and he can’t possibly want a girl like me. This isn’t like a soap opera. This is permanent; I’m not going to walk in four episodes. I may not even be able to have kids. Jeff loves kids. I don’t want him to hate me for derailing his life again.”

  “Pipsqueak, I haven’t known the young man long, but I like what I see. He is respectful of everyone around him and he works hard. He treats you and those girls like you are his top priority and is already fiercely protective. He doesn’t strike me as a man that would be easily swayed to do something he disagrees with. I think he is exactly where he wants to be,” my dad responds.

  “I do love him,” I agree. ”Yet, this is all so fast. Don’t you think it’s too soon?” I ask, hoping my dad can make sense of the war between my head and my heart.

  “Pip, I can’t tell you that. Only you and Jeff know for sure what you’l
l find when you look in your hearts. With your mom, I knew within 10 minutes after meeting Karen that I needed to make her mine as much as I needed to breathe, even though her parents were very well off. For me, it came down to whether I could envision my life for one more second without your mom in it and I simply could not, despite all of our differences.”

  “It’s true for me too,” I answer sincerely. ”I don’t ever want to live without him. I wish I could keep the girls safe forever too. They don’t deserve to be bounced around their whole life.”

  “You need to take this one step at a time and the rest will work itself out,” my dad advises. “I think it’s wonderful that he calls you Pip. Someday, I’ll have to ask him to tell me the story behind that.”

  I immediately turn fire engine red and start to fiddle with Becca’s blanket to cover my discomfort. Of course, my dad zeroes in on my behavior very quickly as he quips, “Hmm, there must be a lot more to the story than meets the eye. Maybe I’m better off being kept in the dark. There’s only so much my sensitive trucker ears can take.”

  “Suit yourself Dad,” I deadpan with a cheeky grin, “a little mystery in our relationship is good.”

  My dad chuckles and tweaks my nose. “Now hand over that Princess Peanut. I haven’t been able to hold her yet because you’ve been hogging her. It’s my turn,” he pleads with large irresistible puppy dog eyes.

  I gingerly hand Becca over to my dad. ”Be careful,” I caution. “She’s wiggly and her bottom is still very sore.”

  Just then, the nurse waves me over. I comply quickly, fearing an emergency. Adrenaline is coursing through my body as I round the corner to Mindy’s room with break-neck speed. The nurse holds her finger up to her lips to keep me quiet. I slow down and peek around the corner, not knowing what to expect. The sight that greets me leaves me breathless and warm all over. Jeff is sprawled on the bed in mismatched socks. Mindy is curled up in a ball on his chest, clutching her new doll. Jeff’s arm is curved around her small back in a protective gesture and the book they were reading is serving as a makeshift blanket.