The Pavement Bookworm

by Philani Dladla

  Finally, she asked me a question that I was praying she would ask. She asked what my kids needed the most. In those days the kids needed stationery and our club needed new books to read. I had many friends on social platforms like Facebook and Twitter who wanted to send me books but it wasn’t easy because many were in foreign countries like China, the UK and the USA. They wanted to help with book donations but it was hard for them to get the books.

  I told her about my friend Dean, who had agreed to pay someone to design a website for me, so that I could communicate with all the people who wanted to help. It would be easy for people to get to know more about the readers’ club, my kids and their needs and how to get involved if I had a website. She said it would be a pleasure for the Gullan and Gullan team to design a website for me and also to help with storage space when people sent books. That’s how The Pavement Bookworm Foundation – www.pavementbookworm.co.za – was born.

  While my website was under construction, Kathryn worked extra hard transporting me to and from the office every time I had to be there. She made sure my website looked just the way I wanted it to look. She is head of copy and content at Gullan and Gullan but she spent her time working on making my dream a reality. I guess everybody at Gullan and Gullan believed in me and that’s why they invested so much time and resources to make sure that my site happened and that I was satisfied with it. Even though Dean Lotter had offered to pay the bill – I never paid them a dime – they made me feel like I was a paying customer. I was there to give the nod or reject what I was not cool with.

  I wanted my website to be extra special so we decided to launch it with a bang on 18 July 2014, which is International Nelson Mandela Day, in Joubert Park. All the members from the readers’ club, the team from Gullan and Gullan and friends were there. They bought the children freshly made lunch and drinks; Staedtler blessed them with a stationery donation. Gifted Young Leaders and Philips were there. All thanks to the donation that my friend Dean Lotter made. Oh yes, my kids had more than enough books to read since many South Africans showed us love. Although I don’t have enough words to thank everybody who contributed I’m grateful from the bottom of my heart.

  My website launched with a bang and we didn’t just do 67 minutes on Mandela Day. My kids still use the stationery and now they do their homework at night, though they live in a building with no electricity, because they still have those solar lights courtesy of Dean Lotter and Phillips. They still read the books they received on Mandela Day.

  I have so many reasons to be proud that I’m alive; I don’t need anyone to remind me. I don’t live just to exist; I live to make a difference. If I die today I’ll rest in peace knowing that I played my part; I touched many lives and left my mark. I do what I do not because anyone is watching or for public display but to make me happy. A smile is highly contagious and every time I make someone smile, it makes me smile too. Even a child knows that the ugliest guy in the world looks so much better when he smiles.

  Through my observations, I think money is as highly addictive as nyaope; chasing money is gambling with your life just as much as experimenting with drugs is. Money makes people heartless just like drugs can turn the sweetest kid into a heartless criminal. Money makers are like drug addicts; once they get some they want more, once they get more, they want more and more of it, once they get more and more, they want more and more and more at any expense. They’ll risk their lives to get more, and what’s this stupid phrase they use? Oh they call it get rich or die trying. I mean that’s stupid, right? Why would you risk your life for something that you’ve already seen so many people die for? For something that you have seen many people making more than too much of it, but have died and left it here in the world where they found it? If you’re still struggling to answer that one I’ve got an answer: stupidity. Money makes people so stupid they forget about what really matters in life.

  A country of my skull

  I STARTED DOCUMENTING MY LIFE on the street, writing everything on a notebook that I kept with me at all times. But life became easier when my friend, Linda Wilson, gave me a laptop, which I used to record my story. But unfortunately I lost most parts of this book in one incident. I was attacked and robbed by three men and from their accent it sounded like they might have been from Zimbabwe.

  I was walking on Leyds Street, heading to where I used to go to collect my book club kids from the park where they played soccer, close to Royal Park Hotel, when this guy came toward me from behind and held me by the neck and as suddenly as he appeared two more appeared and started picking my pockets. They were doing it in a way that told me they wanted to make sure they left nothing behind. The laptop they took contained a better version of this story.

  After some time and some digging, my friend, Brian and I did manage to track them down and my suspicions were confirmed. Brian was the neighbourhood know-it-all, your go-to guy for all that went on in the hood. One of the things that probably hurt the most about that incident was that those guys had no idea what they had taken away from me. They couldn’t have known that in that laptop I had valuable documentation and how for months I had laboured, writing about the things happening around me.

  After that I felt like giving up.

  They robbed me, took my laptop, my cell phone and some cash I had in my pocket. What they took wasn’t enough because they still had the balls to beat me like a punching bag before they left. Even Floyd Mayweather would have begged for mercy on that one. The only reason why I’m still alive is God’s mercy. They broke my heart, but not my spirit and that’s the reason why I had enough strength to write it again, starting from page one on a blank A4 exercise book. The words have changed, but the story remains the same. Take whatever you like from me, but you can’t take away my experiences. Sometimes I wonder if our government cares about the rate of crime that happens in the inner city or if they have become complacent about what happens to ordinary citizens, as they call us.

  Screw it, let’s do it: I do a TEDx Talk

  Gullan and Gullan are like a family to me. Together with them we didn’t just create a website and play our part in Mandela Day; they did more than that for me. I love Gullan and Gullan because they care about what I stand for.

  When I received an email invitation to speak at TEDx Johannesburg I didn’t know who or what TEDx was but because I’m always chasing knowledge I never feel embarrassed or shy to ask about something that I know nothing about. I knew my friend Colin Browne did a lot of public speaking and that if TEDx was a real deal he had to know about it so I called him.

  Mr Browne said that TEDx is good and I should be happy that they invited me to share my story on the TEDx stage. Two days after I spoke to Mr Browne, I met Dean for lunch at Doppio Zero. He made it sound more exciting. The more he told me about TEDx, the more I got excited about it. I was now confident to tell my friends at Gullan and Gullan about the invitation to give a talk at TEDx. For them it was a big deal and they were happy for me. They told me Philani, for this one you need to be extra prepared, and asked me if I had started preparing my talk. I told them I didn’t think that it would be necessary because I was too shy to stand in front of so many people.

  Desiree Gullan told me not to worry because they would find me a professional to help me develop my confidence. My answer to that was that I don’t believe anybody can teach somebody how not to be shy. She told me that it has worked for many people before me and that she hoped it would work for me too. Two days later Kathryn called me and said I had an appointment with Marion Scher, the lady who would coach me so that I could take the stage at TEDx Johannesburg and tell my story to the audience with confidence.

  Marion was like an angel who came to my rescue. She made a big difference from our first session. Marion told me that there was nothing wrong with me and that I should remember that nobody is more important than me in this world, no matter how much money or power the next person has. We are all the same in the Creator’s eyes. Those words made a huge difference to me an
d the way I looked at the world; I was used to people looking down on me, I was always worried about being judged. When people always say mean things about you, you end up not liking them. You think everybody staring at you is thinking of something stupid to say about you. You end up thinking that every group of people looking at you is gossiping or saying something negative about you. That’s been my experience since my childhood. I was teased because my eyes are crooked, but my eyes were not my only problem, everything about me was irregular. I have already told you how much of a mission it was for uMa to try to keep me alive.

  What I didn’t tell you is that because I was a victim of malnutrition, uMa and Mrs Smith had to teach me how to walk because when all my peers could walk I was still crawling. My body was weak, but my two angels didn’t want to accept defeat. My mother and Mrs Smith did everything they could to help me live a normal life like every other child. Mrs Smith dug deep into her deeper pockets and made sure uMa had all the financial support we needed and uMa gave me what I can only call unconditional love.

  To this day, I don’t really know how I managed to survive, but here I am, a living miracle very much alive today. I can walk wherever I want to go, I use the same legs, which once couldn’t walk, to run away from Johannesburg’s lazy criminals. They don’t want to go job hunting because others slave for them; they’ll just come and take whatever they want at knife or gun point. Although I see clearly, people who think that they are perfect still make fun of my squint. I have become a man and have developed a thick skin so whatever they say about me doesn’t break me anymore. When they laugh at me, I simply smile and walk away.

  I never fought with anyone for making stupid remarks about how I look. My mother told me that fighting is a foolish man’s hobby. If you smile and walk away, you’ve got nothing to regret. Now that I’m a grown up, people still have a lot of bull to say about me. One good thing that comes with being an adult is that no matter how many bad things people have to say about you, only a few have the balls to say it straight to your face. Most people just gossip.

  I learned a lot from Marion while we were preparing for my TEDx talk. Gullan and Gullan were willing to pay for her time but being the angel that she is Marion trained me free of charge and she gave it her best. Marion transformed me. Before she coached me I always hid behind my shades. I used to wear sunglasses all the time but now I only wear them when I feel like it and not because I’m so shy that I have to, because I was coached by one South Africa’s best coaches.

  Allow me to tell you why I say she’s one of South Africa’s best. Marion Scher runs training courses for many of South Africa’s top companies on media-related subjects, from writing skills to handling media interviews. In 2005, she was awarded the prestigious Rosalynn Carter award for Mental Health Journalism by The Carter Centre in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. Marion has been a freelance journalist for more than 21 years. I have many more reasons to call her the best but there’s a lot to tell about my journey with her and I have got so little time, but I will say this: she made me work really hard preparing my speech, making me say it to her again and again until she was satisfied that I was ready to take the stage.

  We had our training sessions in the boardroom of Gullan and Gullan mostly. They were all very busy so Marion went the extra mile by picking me up from Greenside to do our training at her house. All her efforts paid off because I was able to tell her my story while looking her in the eyes. That was a big challenge for me because I grew up knowing that looking at an adult in the eyes when talking is a sign of being disrespectful.

  My culture is in me – I don’t want to lose it; in fact, I want to pass it to my kids. But I had to adapt because I would be telling my story to people from different backgrounds. Some of them knew nothing about me, who I was and where I was from or what the correct behaviour is in my culture. Maybe some of them didn’t know or care about other people’s cultures. To them, it wouldn’t make sense that looking at an elder in the eyes is a sign of being disrespectful. Marion had to work extra hard on that one. Finally she won because the more I practised, the more I was able to speak to her and other people without feeling guilty about looking at them in the eyes.

  Things were coming together just fine. Though it was hard for me to adapt, I had the best team of friends behind me like Marion, who was a captain, Gullan and Gullan, Gifted Young Leaders, Deborah Strydom, Lisa Skinner, Linda Watson, Dean Lotter, Peter Walters and Colin J Browne. Though Angela Lewis is not in Africa, I could feel the love that she was sending all the way from the United Kingdom. The curator of TEDx Johannesburg, Mr Ithateng Mugoro also helped. That guy’s got brains – if I hadn’t listened to his advice my talk wouldn’t have had as much impact as it did. TEDx Johannesburg was at the Forum in Bryanston on 21 August 2014. I worked closely with Mr Mugoro, sending him my notes, which he read and commented on. We Skyped and we did some media interviews.

  I remember an interview at a radio station called Cliff Central. While he was at the studio, I was at Greenside selling books. They gave me a call, though I don’t remember what questions they asked or how I replied. I’d like to think that I did better on the next one on SAFM because I was more relaxed. I was still in bed when my phone rang and the producer of the show told me to get ready because they were going to put me on air. I felt more comfortable for that one because I was indoors and not selling books on the noisy streets. But my friend Denzel Taylor, who is head of news at Power FM, still believes that the best ever radio interview I did was with Power FM.

  My talk at TEDx almost didn’t happen because I almost missed it. A friend who promised to take me there let me down so I was left stranded. Fortunately another friend gave me a ride but dropped me at Sandton, and from there I took a taxi thinking it was going to Bryanston. When I realised I was going in the wrong direction I asked the driver to drop me off and called Kathryn to fetch me and take me to the venue. Being the angel that she is, she dropped everything she was doing and drove straight to where I was stuck and took me to the venue.

  The venue was packed, and the speakers’ list was also packed. There were 28 speakers including Prof. Justin J Kennedy (neuroscientist, researcher psychologist), Dr Andre Vermeulen (workplace-learning specialist), Ralph Mathekga (political analyst), Marco Cianfanelli (artist), Tony Leon (politician, diplomat), Dr Jeannette McGill (economic geologist, mineral economist), Manda Nkuhlu (social housing investor), Dr Maria Phalime (doctor turned award-winning author), Ingrid Martens (documentary filmmaker), Dr Jasper Grosskurth (futurist, African markets specialist), Dr Barry Dwolatzky (tech visionary), Dr Michaella Janse van Vuuren (designer, artist, engineer), Marianne Fassler (fashion designer), Dr Musa Mhlanga (molecular biophysicist), Mandla Maseko (the ‘afronaut’ – he’s set to be the first black African in space) and many others.

  Some of the things they spoke about I couldn’t relate to. But from Ingrid’s talk I did pick up a thing or two – her talk about Africa under one roof spoke to me. She was speaking about the Ponte building and the variety of people and about the stereotyping we assume as human beings.

  I’d like to believe that as speakers we gave it our best. I’d like to thank the audience for listening attentively. I hope that they learned as much as they were hoping to learn that day. I won’t lie – for me it was a good experience. TEDx Johannesburg introduced me to some good new friends and I met wise and interesting people.

  After TEDx, it was back to working hard, and that’s where Mr Busani Ngcaweni comes in. Busani is my mentor. He is an author, an avid reader, a youth worker and a senior government official. Actually, Mr Ngcaweni made this book possible. When he saw my story on SABC 2’s Morning Live, Busani made an effort to get in touch with me. He called sis Ayanda, the journalist from SABC who interviewed me, to say he saw my story on the show and he was more than willing to help me write my book and get it published. My sister Ayanda was happy to see that something good had come out of that story we did, and she was very excited when she gave me the news. For me it was a step c
loser to achieving one of my lifelong dreams, to write a book and get it published.

  My liberation diaries

  WITHOUT A DOUBT GOD WAS still with me, still loving me and proving that not one of my prayers was ignored. If you have faith, God will amaze you. God has always answered my prayers and I’m sure if I had been praying for money I would be worth millions by now. But I never prayed for money, I prayed for things that make more sense. I remember the last time Busani Ngcaweni and I met; he was launching a good book that he had edited called Liberation Diaries: Reflections on 20 Years of Democracy. This guy was brave to edit a book like this, giving a critique of the state of democracy in South Africa since the first democratic elections in 1994. Upon reading it, it struck me that although this guy worked for the Presidency and belonged to the ANC ruling party, he edited a book that had critical things to say about government. After Googling him, I realised that Ngcaweni had established himself as a writer and public intellectual. Here I was thinking these guys in government have hectic lives juggling day jobs and public life.

  At a Melville book launch, Ngcaweni was kind enough to give me time on stage so that I could tell the audience about my forthcoming book and myself. He also introduced me to many interesting South Africans including his son Mhlengi Wandile Ngcaweni, who also wrote a chapter in Liberation Diaries; and Mr Eric Myeni, who is also an author of books. Captured by my story, Eric Myeni kindly gave me 10 copies of his book, A Letter from Paris and complemented Ngcaweni for sharing his time and platform with me.

  That afternoon I also met a lovely lady called Malaika wa Azania, who was launching her book entitled Memoirs of a Born Free, and many other people who are passionate about books. That’s not all that Busani did for me – he went the extra mile to help my good friend Leizl Eykelhof, who is as passionate about getting kids reading as I am.