by Rue Volley
We walked out of my room, and the few residents roaming the hallways stepped back from me, like I was a demon…but I was so not one. I think that I’d met those and trust me; I was the opposite. I loved life and don’t want to see anyone hurt in any way; although my humor would tell you otherwise. We walked, and one of my neighbors stared at me. I looked at her and grinned, and she looked away, like I would cause her to place her pillow on her face later on and suffocate herself with just my mind bullets… Ha, ‘mind bullets’… I like that.
The intern kept her hold on my arm and pulled me along with her until we got to the visiting room. She opened the door up, and I looked in and spotted Kai, sitting in a chair by the window… staring out. He looks taller; I guessed he should be. He was 16 and hitting his growth spurt. I guessed it didn’t help that I never got to see him that often… that has a way of making people look different too.
The door closed behind me, and the intern sat down at her desk and picked up her book and started reading. I glanced at her and then back to Kai, who was now standing. I smiled, and he did too…good start. I walked to him, and he stared at my ‘mittens’ and smiled.
“Trying to claw people?” he asked me.
I shook my head and laughed.
“I just thought it would go great with my dress,” I said, as I looked down at my hospital looking gown.
He looked me over and shook his head.
“Yea, good luck dating,” he said.
I shrugged my shoulders.
“Yea… they will be lining up to take me out,” I said.
Kai laughed and hugged me. I found that, since the last time I had seen him, he had grown taller. Now, my face was just under his chin. He let me go, and I looked up at him.
“Thanks for coming to see me,” I said.
He grinned and sat down. I looked behind me and sat down too. I hated those freakin’ mittens; they make me feel like I don’t have all my balance… annoying. Kai sat there and stared at me; it made me feel like I had something on my face. I wiggled my nose, just in case.
“So… how ya doin?” he asked me.
I tilted my head and leaned back in the chair.
“Oh… great,” I said, as I looked out the window past him.
“The nurse told me that you are writing a book.”
I sat up and looked at him.
“I am,” I said.
“About what?” he asked.
“A lot of stuff,” I said.
I then leaned forward and looked at him.
“It is a story about us… I mean, it just kinda comes out of me,” I said, knowing that it sounded crazy.
Kai smiled and stared at my face.
“Can I read it?”
“What?” I asked him.
“Yea… I just want to see it,” he said.
“No you don’t,” I said.
Kai laughed and leaned back in the chair.
“Okay then… don’t,” he said.
I frowned and tried to read his face, but he is so hard to read…he really is.
“Are you serious?” I asked him.
He shrugged his shoulders and looked out the window.
“Yea, but if you don’t want me too, it’s cool,” he said.
“Just, ah… let me finish the first book,” I said.
He looked at me and raised his eyebrows.
“The first one?” he asked.
“Yea… this is series,” I said.
“How many books are you planning on writing?” he asked me.
“I think 6… maybe,” I said.
“That is crazy,” he said.
“Why?”
Kai smiled and leaned up to face me.
“I know you love to read… but writing, I just never figured,” he said.
I adjusted myself on the chair and looked at my bound hands.
“I didn’t know that I wanted to; it just hit me one day,” I said.
“Huh,” he said, and in Kai talk… that means he is impressed.
“Okay… cool… so how are Mom and Dad?” I asked him.
Kai shrugged his shoulders and looked back out the window.
“We don’t talk a lot… Dad is gone, and Mom is outside…a lot,” he said.
“What do you mean by ‘gone’?”
“Traveling, Rue… He got a new job, and they have him flying all over the place.”
I looked at Kai, and he looked sad… he really did. I so wanted to ask him why, but unless he is in the mood, he won’t tell you anyway… so why bother. I worry about him though, all of them.
“Flying where?” I asked, just trying to extend the conversation.
Kai looked at me and grinned.
“You don’t care,” he said.
I looked at my hands and back up at him.
“I do… I mean, you get to eat and hang out with them, and I get occasional visits,” I said.
Kai looked at my hands, and then he placed his on mine.
“You make it really hard to be the asshole brother… you know it?” he whispered.
He leaned back and looked at my face.
“You don’t act like a fourteen-year old either… stop it,” he said.
I laughed and looked at him.
“Like you are that much older! You just turned sixteen.”
He looked around the room and then leaned up.
I did too; because I thought that he was about to tell me a secret.
“I got my license today… I drove here,” he said, as he nodded.
“No way,” I said.
He leaned back, pulled out his keys, and jingled them.
“Well, I am impressed… I won’t lie,” I said.
Kai smiled, and then it faded. He looked down at the keys and placed them back in his pocket. I looked at him, kind of confused. You would think that he would love rubbing my nose in it so much. I leaned up, and he stood up and looked down at me.
“I gotta go,” he said.
“Already?” I asked him.
“Twenty minute time limit… I am still underage, unless mom or dad are here… I can’t stay that long,” he said.
“Oh… okay. Well, I am glad for you, with the whole driving thingy… but feel sad for all the people in town,” I said.
He laughed and pulled me up out of the chair.
He then hugged me… a long one. He leaned in my ear.
“I can’t wait until I can drive you out of here,” he whispered.
It then hit me that he was sad that he couldn’t torment me with his driving.
I sighed and looked up at him.
“Someday… hopefully sooner than later,” I said.
He messed up my hair, and I yelled at him. The intern looked up and killed the normal brother/sister annoying moment. I rolled my eyes and bumped him, as she went back to reading her book.
“Come back soon… I will give you my book. I am almost done with the first one,” I said.
He grinned and touched my face.
“I am sure it sucks; you can’t spell for shit.”
I would have hit him, but no… I was on mitten lock down, so I stuck out my tongue. He laughed, as he walked with me to the door.
“I love you,” he said.
I looked at him and smiled.
“I love you too, try to not run over anybody,” I said.
He walked out and went to the right, towards the elevators, and I walked with the intern to the left. I glanced back at him, just to catch him looking at me as he disappeared onto the elevator. The intern opened my door up, and I stepped in. She took my mittens off, and I stretched my fingers out and walked back to the laptop and sat down.
“I’d like to read it too,” she muttered.
I looked back at her, and she turned and opened the door up.
“Okay,” I said.
She closed the door behind her, and I turned back to the laptop. I flipped it open and turned it on, waiting for it to load up. I bit my lip and looked at the door.
Why doe
s she want to read it? Oh well, maybe she is just nosey.
I started to type, and then I stopped and stood up and walked to the window. I stood there and thought about it, sharing this book… or books with people. I mean, so far it has been fun. But I had a feeling that it would change, and I would be left to wonder if I should have written it.
I turned when I felt something… a slight vibration, and I watched my plastic cup tip over on my tray and spill. I stood there and crossed my arms on my chest, looking around the room. It must have been something in the asylum that caused it, some type of machinery or something. I looked out, and a construction crew worked on the grounds, tearing up the earth… It looked like they were making this place bigger. Great, bring all the crazies in. Perfect. I didn’t want any roommates, like they would let me have one anyway with the whole ‘murder’ thing and stuff.
I walked back to my laptop and sat down, and before I knew it, I had written another chapter and another. Finally, I couldn’t focus anymore; so I turned it off and closed it up… to write of flashing lights and vibration another day.
***
Holly was true to her word and did take a copy. She scared the crap out of me when she didn’t talk to me about it for a week after she loaded it on to a memory stick. I was sure that she was dazzled or disgusted… hopefully the first one, because the second would suck butt.
Finally, on the seventh day, she tapped on my door and peeked in. I looked up from the laptop and stopped typing. She stepped in and stood there, like she wanted to say something. I waited and turned in my chair, hoping to hear that she liked it… I didn’t know why it matters so much, but I guessed when all you had to look forward to is just that, well then that made it matter. She walked to the bed and sat down. I bit my lip and stared at her and then closed my laptop.
“I read it,” she said.
I took a breath and looked at the floor.
“I will be honest with you. The first chapter is a mess, and the second one has a lot of typos… but after that…”
I looked up at her.
“I loved it; I really did… How far are you now?” she asked me.
“Really?” I asked her.
“Yes…really. It was like I couldn’t stop reading.”
“Wow,” I said.
“Yea, like I said… the beginning needs work, but after that, it really gets good.”
I looked at her and grinned.
“I will fix it then; I am almost done,” I said.
She stood up and looked at me.
“Okay… load it up,” she said.
I looked at her hand, as she held out the memory stick, and smiled.
“Alright… I am on chapter 17, one more chapter to go,” I said.
“Oh… then just finish, and I will take the whole thing,” she said.
She walked to the door and stopped, as she opened it up.
“I really… really like Joshua Barrington,” she said.
I felt my heart flutter and smiled.
“Me too,” I said.
“Oh, I can tell.”
She walked out and closed the door behind her.
I looked back at the laptop and opened it up; I grinned and adjusted myself in my chair.
“She loved it,” I whispered to myself, and it felt great… really, really great.
***
I continued to write, right through the rest of the year, and the next and the one after that. Holly helped me fix stuff and pointed out small things that made what I was saying clearer… even to me. Although it was all in my head. I stopped after each book and edited it myself… well, with help from Holly. In fact, she would print it and mark stuff, and we became a team of sorts. I have to laugh about that because here I was now, almost eighteen, and I was still writing… writing…writing. I mean, what else did I have to do with my time?
I wrote the first book really fast, and it took the longest to edit. I was also fourteen, and had never written anything in my life. So, that one took a long time to settle down and make cohesive. The second book went smoother; the third was done too… but with Holly doing all the editing. I think she liked to do it… I didn’t.
I just love to write, and the story poured out of me most days, like I lived it. I guess it helps, with the Josh thing that I feel. I write him so well; I swear that he is in the room with me, leaning in my ear and whispering what to say. I wished he was real; I really did. As I had written, the scenes between him and my main character… named after me funny enough… I had gotten a little hot. I was almost eighteen; so, I think about a lot of things that I wished I could do… regular stuff and then you know, the other stuff that makes me blush.
I looked up when the door opened, and my Mom walked in, with my Dad close behind her. I smiled and stood up, closing my laptop and rubbing my fingers on the top of it. I had just left off on a good scene between Josh and Rue… on the floor in the asylum… holy crap. My Mom looked at me and smiled, and I smiled back.
“Hey,” I said.
My Mom walked to me and hugged me. My Dad stood behind her and grinned, as he took his hat off and rubbed his hand through his hair.
“I didn’t know you were coming today,” I said, as she let me go and touched my face.
“Why not...? It is your birthday,” she said.
I looked at my calendar on the wall and grinned.
“Oh yea… eighteen, wow,” I said, as I waved my hands, and my Dad laughed.
My Mom looked at him and smiled.
“Tomorrow is the big day,” she said.
I looked at her and crinkled my eyebrows.
“Oh… yea, I forgot,” I said.
My Dad smiled and walked to the window.
“Well, we didn’t. I mean, every year… day after your birthday, we do this,” he said.
I looked at my Mom, and she looked at her hands. I knew that she tries to stay all super positive, but every year it’s the same thing. We all go to the board, and they say, “Miss Volley was placed here for her own protection and that of the world.”
‘The WORLD’ …I guess that they needed to make it sound like if I was to ever get out of here, I would go on a rampage like a giant lizard and kill everything and everybody. Uh huh.
“You know what they will say,” I said, as I sat down on my bed and picked up my pillow.
“Now we need to be positive. It will happen… I know it.”
I looked at my Mom and then over to my Dad, who still stared out the window and watched the birds landing on the trees.
“The world,” he said.
I laughed and hit him with the pillow. I mean, he was an ass…just like me. I think that he understood me… much more so than my Mom does; because I was like my Dad… especially when it came to my humor.
“Yes, the world… they don’t want me out there terrorizing the townsfolk,” I said.
My Dad laughed, but my Mom did not.
I glanced at her and cleared my throat.
“Or, they may say… go ahead and leave,” I said.
My Dad nodded his head, and my Mom looked at me and placed her hand on her hip.
“I want you to think good things… We all need to do that.”
“Okay, Mom… I’m sorry. It’s just, I kinda got a bad rep,” I said.
My Dad busted up laughing, and my Mom held back her grin.
“You suck, just like Kai and your Father,” She said.
“And you… we are kind of a package deal… The Volleys… sucking,” I said.
She grabbed my pillow and almost knocked me off the bed with it.
I laughed, and so did my Dad.
“You know that Elie will be there again,” My Dad said.
My Mom looked at him, and her laughter stopped.
“I know… she is umm, a bitch,” My Mom said.
I raised my eyebrows at her.
“Mom!” I said.
“Well, it is true. She was nasty as a child and well into adulthood. I am sorry that her son is dead, but her e
ntire family had always been psychotic.”
I looked at my Dad and raised my eyebrows.
He raised his hands and looked at her.
“Could you not talk tomorrow?” I asked her.
She looked at me and smiled.
“I will not say a word.”
“Thanks Mom!” I said.
My Dad pulled out a small box with a bow on it, and I took a breath. I was so not big on birthdays or presents of any kind. Obviously for good reason. He held it out to me and wiggled his hand. I took it reluctantly.
“It’s just something little,” he said. “I know that you don’t like birthdays.”
I looked at it in my hand and sighed.
“That is true,” I said.
“Well, save it… When they release you, you can open it up as a celebration thingy,” My Mom said.
I smiled that she said ‘thingy’ and placed the box on the bed.
“Okay… it may collect dust then,” I said.
“Rue Volley,” My Mom said.
I looked up at her, and she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.
“I love you… happy birthday,” she said.
I closed my eyes, and my Dad tapped me on the head.
I smiled at him, and he walked towards the door.
My Mom lingered for a moment and then turned.
“I love you both,” I said.
They stopped and looked at me and smiled.
“We will be here early, so don’t get all flustered writing your book,” My Mom said.
My eyes got big, and she grinned.
“Your brother is still reading. He says that you are all about a boy in the books.”
I blushed and looked at my hands.
“Ummm, yea… I ah,” I said.
“Well, no worries, it is a book, Rue,” she said.
I swallowed and looked at them, as they left me in the room. That was an awful thing to say about the books. I mean, this is my life, without them, I would probably be drooling on the bed, overdosed on crazy people cocktail. I stood up and walked to the window. I leaned my head against it and closed my eyes.
“I know that you are not real,” I said out loud… just trying to convince myself that Josh, as well as all my other friends in the books, did not exist, but god I wish that they did… I really do.
