Psyche Shield

by Chrissie Buhr

  Sadie lifted the stone in her hand, chosen for the raw quartz embedded in it. She showed it to Nathan, who finally drew his gaze away from the mound of fresh earth. “Kathryn says the stones represent us. Each marker is a packmate, and together they represent Pack. We pile them into a monument that stays here with John, a statement that he will always be Pack. The markers stay with his body and we take a piece of him with us. If he’s with us like they say he is, he understands what happened and doesn’t blame you. He’s happy that you’re free now. The rest of us are too.”

  Amy tugged at her mate gently. “You’re the only one who blames you, Nate. Let’s go place the markers. Then we’ll run.” He bobbed his head and pulled her closer as they turned to follow the others.

  The nearly full moon hung low behind them, beginning its ascent into the sky as the sun disappeared ahead. They followed their packmates and found Kathryn waiting for them in the shadows, listening. “The marker represents more than memories of those who passed before us.”

  The Elder didn’t elaborate, and eventually Sadie asked. “What more does it represent?”

  “You see Pack in the same way you see family. Your first family abandoned you. Your second family cast you out. This is not the way it is in Pack. Each packmate becomes part of the whole and cannot be removed by oneself or by another. Pack is a promise. It is forever. Even death cannot take that away.”

  Sadie pondered this while they caught up to the others. Billie stood beside Jason, waiting for her mate to join her. Sadie had spent most of life alone. Kathryn’s statement and the deep reverence of her packmates seeped into her. It touched something inside of her she didn’t know existed. An old wound, buried and undisturbed for years, opened and she felt what she’d lacked for so long. It ached, and for a few minutes tears fell for her loneliness as much as for John.

  Sadie watched her packmates. She’d earned her place in the pack, promising her loyalty and proving she’d protect them no matter what. A Rottweiler could do that. She could earn respect, but she couldn’t earn Pack. It could only be given. The newly open wound widened, and with this new understanding she looked at everyone present. She watched Matthew for a few minutes, remembering his promise to her. You are Pack, and I will not break that promise either.

  Her packmates gathered around a rock face. One by one, each person placed their stone before it, the pile rising into the night. Each Wolf transformed after placing their marker, returning to wait with their loved ones. The simple shrine grew, a symbol of strength in unity, of endurance through Pack.

  When Nathan’s turn came, he hesitated then placed his marker resolutely. He studied the shrine for a moment before shimmering into a red wolf. Sadie followed, placing hers last. She wasn’t Wolf, so she did not transform. Instead she rejoined her mate and friends, sitting on the ground so she could lean against Billie in her shorter wolf form.

  Complete, the tombstone looked like a simple pile of rocks, not a natural occurrence but nothing that would draw attention. Only someone who knew Pack customs would recognize it as a Wolf funeral shrine. With every stone and every packmate accounted for, Wolves sat on their haunches and raised their heads in a low mournful song. They sang for their lost packmate and for the bond between them that could not be broken even in death. Crying children clung to parents in both forms. LeeAnn kneeled on the ground crying into her mother’s furred neck while Dean stood somberly with his father.

  The Humans and Sadie let the song fill their hearts. When it died into silence, the Wolves signaled their intent to run. Many brushed against a loved one before bounding into the trees. With their four-legged packmates out of sight, everyone else headed back to camp. They didn’t have to walk far, and the bright moon guided their way.

  # # #

  Keep reading for a preview of Psyche Chorus, coming soon!

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  Now step away from your reading device, walk outside, and bask in the moonlight!

  About Chrissie Buhr

  Characters and stories unfold within me whether I write or not. So I write! I love to dream the impossible and bring magic into the mundane. I believe beauty can be found in the most difficult of moments and humor keeps us sane in the midst of chaos. My characters are fantastic creatures that open our senses and let us see the world in a new way. Yet they are like any of us with strengths and weaknesses, struggles and triumphs, and sometimes they simply want to survive what life throws at them. When typing a conversation feels more like transcribing than creating, and the words flow naturally from their lips, I know I’ve successfully breathed life into the characters.

  Whether living in a cabin in the woods or a city apartment, Idaho’s wilderness is my home. The wilds are true civilization, and its inhabitants my sisters and brothers. I am most content with open sky above me, trees surrounding me, and feet bare against the earth. I live a simple life. Friends, family, art, writing, and community are my world.

  Books by Chrissie Buhr

  Psyche Moon

  Psyche Honor

  Psyche Shield

  Email Chrissie Buhr

  Psyche Chorus

  Psyche Moon Four

  Chrissie Buhr

  “If you talk to the animals

  they will talk with you

  and you will understand each other.

  If you do not talk to them

  you will not know them,

  and what you do not know you will fear.

  What one fears one destroys.”

  ~ Chief Dan George ~

  Chapter 1

  Black asphalt raced beneath us, ushering us out of the city as we left Pack Territory behind. Buildings dwindled until farmlands and open fields extended on either side. "You never mentioned Ontario when we talked about this job. Or when I accepted it,” I repeated the complaint from the passenger seat of Glenn’s car.

  The Wolf diverted his eyes from the road long enough to throw an amused glance my way. He could undoubtedly smell the anxiety building in me and tapped his hand on the wheel. The corner of his mouth twitched in a lopsided grin. "You wouldn’t have agreed. They can manage without us for one night. You worry too much.”

  With mock seriousness, I settled back into the seat and waved a hand theatrically. “You're right. It's been a whole week since anyone has invaded our territory and tried to kill us. You'd think I'd be over it by now.” With a sharp breath I nervously checked the rearview mirror, watching the Treasure Valley disappear in our wake. When stretched to the limits of my abilities, I could sense everyone around me in a ten mile range. We’d moved beyond that and I realized how much consolation I’d drawn from feeling my packmates around me. This far away I wouldn’t know if they encountered problems. I couldn’t protect them if the wrong Mage arrived in my absence.

  Glenn chuckled, oblivious to the danger that loomed on the horizon and the source of my fretting. After weeks of internal conflict, I had Pack Status. Even the few packmates who still disapproved accepted me as Pack. The Montana Wolves no longer hunted us and a week had passed without any menace materializing. By all appearances life had returned to normal, or as normal as possible within a Wolf Pack that included a Mage. It wouldn’t last.

  “Enjoy the down time when you have it,” he advised.

  “Live for today, not tomorrow. It's a great philosophy and not one I’ve mastered yet,” I admitted. “That seems to be a Wolf skill. It’s not as easy for the rest of us.”

  Like most of my packmates, he’d initially distrusted me because I’m a Mage. As his reservations faded, I’d discovered his quirky sense of humor and boy-like charm. He drove with one hand on the wheel, a light breeze from the window blowing his hair around his face. "Today we've got a job to do, and tomorrow you'll be back in Boise where you can neurotically guard the territory again.”

  “I am not neurotic,” I replied ha
ughtily, knowing full well my recent behavior weakened the defense.

  “If you say so,” he replied affably. "This convention is the perfect venue to find the buyer. We'll have the scent by midnight, catch a few hours' sleep, and drive back first thing in the morning.”

  “You realize I have no sense of smell, right?”

  “Good thing I do.” He replied with a toothy grin. We’d already fine-tuned the plan for the evening, and we briefly reviewed it. Glenn worked for our Alpha’s security and investigative agency, and they’d hired me as a consultant. Industrial espionage didn’t interest us much, but it paid well. We didn’t care about this case beyond completing it swiftly and professionally. Glenn had already narrowed down the list of suspects and wanted me to read a few minds and identify the guilty party. He’d follow up with some of his remarkable computer skills to prove it without revealing how we obtained the information.

  To date, most of our conversations had centered on training sessions or the case. I’d grown to like the easy-going Wolf and decided to take the opportunity to get to know him better. "I can’t place your accent. Where are you from?”

  “I grew up in Vermont and went to school in New York. My parents were from Switzerland.”

  “That explains it. How'd you end up in Idaho?”

  “I met a girl, got married, and we moved here to be near her family. The marriage didn’t last, but I stayed.”

  I’d only heard about his mate, and news of a first wife caught me by surprise. "What happened?”

  His fingers tapped the steering wheel again. "That's a good question. She packed a bag and said she was leaving. She didn’t tell me why and I never saw her again.”

  He seemed untroubled by it, and I wondered how many decades had passed since then. He looked about forty years old, but appearances meant little among Wolves. They aged slowly and if he started regaling me with first-hand stories of the Great Depression or the Civil War it would not amaze me. "That had to have been a shock. A few of my girlfriends did that, but it was pretty obvious why.”

  “What do you mean?” He asked without any sign of disbelief.

  “When I thought I was Human, I tried to hide my mental abilities. I always slipped up eventually. Once they started seeing it, they didn’t stick around.”

  He nodded sagely. "I can see that. You and Billie seem to have it down, though.”

  I thought back to those first few weeks with Billie before I knew about Wolves and Mages. "I tried to hide it from her, but she figured it out. At first she thought I was a Sensitive, but even when she found out I’m a Mage she didn’t run from it. She was the first person who didn't.”

  “Has there been a second?” His question hit me like a knife to the chest and he backtracked, scowling at himself. "That was insensitive. Sorry.”

  I looked out at the passing landscape and replied sadly, "Don't worry about it. That you'd even ask shows how true it is. It's better than it used to be.”

  “You’re Pack now. We quit trying to kill you weeks ago. That’s improvement.” He didn't tiptoe around the topic, and the blunt statement made me chuckle. My packmates' tendency for frank honesty could be uncomfortable, but I’d grown to appreciate it.

  “You're only pretending to try to kill me now. That is definitely an improvement.” I joked before my thoughts turned sober again. "It's easier with Wolves than it ever was with Humans. You may not like what I am, but I don't have to hide it.”

  He found the statement disconcerting and turned his scowl on me. "You’ve been hunted almost every day since we found out you’re a Mage. Right now it’s for training, but most of the time someone has wanted you dead. That’s easier?”

  The question didn't even require thought. "Yes. It's honest and straightforward, and I can be myself. Besides, I’m not alone anymore.”

  His forehead creased as he considered my answer. "That's messed up. How are you handling the training? We’ve been pushing it hard, and you don't get any warning.” At my request, Glenn and a few others had spent the last week hunting me. We explored my abilities and searched for weaknesses they could get through. So far they hadn’t had much success sneaking up on me, but I wasn’t the average Mage.

  “I'm fine with it.” I assured him determinedly. His skeptical look revealed his disbelief as clearly as if I’d read his mind. "It really doesn’t. You guys can handle almost any Mage now, and that makes me feel better. It’s been harder for Billie than me.”

  Billie and I shared an unusual mental connection that even our matebond couldn’t explain. They couldn’t warn her without alerting me. Some of the strongest Wolves in the pack stalked and hunted her mate, appearing suddenly and stopping just short of attacking me. She understood training and knew better than anyone how important it was. Even so, the frequency and lack of warning grated on her nerves. Highly protective by nature, she held back her impulse to retaliate whenever they appeared.

  The entire team had commented on their Beta’s mood several times. They’d never hurt a packmate, and that finally included me. But instinct oftentimes overpowered better judgment when a Wolf’s mate was threatened, and Billie was more protective than most. “Her self-control is impressive. I don’t know how well I’d manage.” He shook his head.

  “She gets irritable, but sparring with Matthew helps her work it out. She likes the progress we’re making. She knows it’s for my safety as well as the pack’s. That helps.” The conversation reminded me that my packmates could handle almost any situation without me. I started to unwind and enjoy the road trip.

  We reached Ontario and navigated the unfamiliar streets, finding the hotel without difficulty. “Classy.” I commented as we entered the posh lobby with overnight bags. Glenn checked us in and we rode an elevator up several flights to reach our room.

  “The bed’s yours.” He stated, setting his laptop on the desk. “The floor’s comfortable in wolf form.”

  I dropped my bag on the table and hung up my dress so it wouldn’t wrinkle. “It’s been a long time since I’ve pretended to be straight. It’s weird acting like your wife.”

  “If it gets too weird we could pretend to have a fight and get a second room.” He teased, leaning against the desk and watching me settle into the environment.

  “I know you’re capable of being a gentleman.” I teased.

  “Do I look like a gentleman? I’ve been accused of acting like a wolf.” He looked at me sideways in a comical imitation of a leering scoundrel.

  I chuckled. “I think you’re too smart to try anything. But your stomach is starting to sound wolfish. I can hear it growling. Come on, we have a couple hours to kill and I saw a steak house up the street.”

  We linked arms, playing the part, and left the hotel. It had become habit to extend my awareness as far as possible, evaluating my surroundings at all times. Following Glenn’s advice, I made myself tone it down and enjoy the time off. A fall storm dimmed the afternoon sun, and gusts of wind periodically hit us. “Do you think it’s going to rain?” I asked, looking at the clouds above us.

  “Nope.” He replied. “The storm’s moving out. It’ll be clear in a few hours.”

  I regarded at him closely. “You’re not guessing. You know that for sure. Is that a Wolf thing?”

  He nodded and looked at the sky. “Yeah, we have a sense for the weather. And I pre-date cell phones and weather apps.”

  “Do you pre-date computers?” I asked curiously as we entered the dim light of the steak house.

  “Oh yeah. I started hearing about them when I was young. I was hooked from the get go. I even got in on one of the early projects, long before they became available to the public.” A server interrupted our conversation. The dinner rush hadn’t started, and he seated us right away.

  I’d always discerned the emotions and superficial thoughts of those around me, much like Humans noticed hair color or Wolves recognized scents. A man eating alone caught my attention. He sat with his back towards us and glanced over his shoulder as we walked by. Mid
dle aged and thin, he looked like someone with a high metabolism who didn’t bother working out. His modest and lightly wrinkled business attire suggested he'd just finished a long day at work.

  Outwardly he ignored us, but his attention stayed squarely focused on Glenn. His unease compounded with every minute that passed. He projected it so loudly I didn’t have to touch his mind to feel it. The server showed us to a table not far from him, took our drink order and left. I nodded unobtrusively towards the man and muttered too quietly for anyone but Glenn to hear. “He’s really scared of you.”

  He replied almost as quietly, and I barely heard him. "I can tell. I get that sometimes.” I had no doubt the Wolf could smell the man's fear, but it didn't faze him. Something about the man nagged at me, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I thought he might get up and leave several times, but he continued eating.

  “Why? Does he ...” I couldn't have the conversation I wanted in an open restaurant and stopped myself. I didn't have this problem with Billie. I almost raised an illusion to prevent anyone from hearing us, but Glenn saved me the trouble.

  “Yes and no. They don't know, but they sense it sometimes. Maybe he's a little Sensitive.” Glenn referred to Humans with a Mage ancestor who inherited some of our abilities. Wolves referred to these people as Sensitives, though few knew of the Mage blood that flowed in their veins. We ordered our food and changed the topic to a more Human appropriate conversation. When the meal came, it didn't disappoint.

  Billie and I could always sense each other through our bond. Mindspeech allowed us to communicate more like a verbal conversation, and we could speak as easily as if she sat beside me. I already missed her, despite her constant presence in my mind. For the first time since leaving Boise, I contacted her. We found an amazing steak house. I'll to have to bring you here someday.