The Evensong

by Lindsay Payton

  “You’ve got to believe me, okay?” he mumbled, holding my face in his hands.

  “I do,” I said, a slight lie. “I just … it will just feel like a long time without you.”

  “I’ll do the drive in a day, probably be there for two or three, then I’ll be back. You won’t notice the time.”

  I laughed slightly. “Yeah I will.”

  “I’ll keep tabs on you then, call you when I can. It’ll be easy.”

  Maybe easy for you. “Okay.”

  He took me back upstairs and insisted on sleep. We both needed it, and even though I knew I wouldn’t get any, he was more exhausted than he let on. So I let him fall asleep curled around me while my mind was in a constant storm, dreading the second the gray morning light seeped through the thin curtains.

  I dozed shortly after dawn, and I didn’t even feel Linden get up. He let me sleep as he got ready, and I finally opened my eyes when he was taking his bag downstairs. I sat up slowly and rubbed my eyes, knowing I had to do the same.

  I didn’t have a lot to pack. After I dressed, I brushed my teeth and wrenched my hair up into a lame bun. There was a constant feeling of anxiety in my chest, and my heart had a spasm whenever Linden walked by with something else he’d forgotten to pack. When my backpack was finally full, I trudged down the stairs where he was waiting with his bag already in the car.

  “Got everything?” he asked as I walked onto the porch.

  “Yeah,” I said, holding up my backpack. He took it for me and tossed it into the back, going back to the porch to lock the front door.

  “Hopefully no one thinks there’s anything valuable in there,” he said when he came back. I smiled slightly and sat down in the passenger seat.

  The drive was virtually silent as we thumped over the rugged road. His rain had paved new ruts into it and potholes were still somewhat full of water. The morning seemed too quiet to be going up the driveway to my home where I could see a few people in the kitchen. I looked away.

  “Does Rene know I’m coming back?” I asked quietly when he pulled to a stop.

  “Alysana said she would tell her,” he replied, killing the engine. I still couldn’t believe they’d planned this sort of thing together. After Aly’s long dislike of him, now they were working behind my back.

  “I’m going to walk you in, okay?” Linden said.

  I looked at him in awe. “What?” He had never wanted to enter my house willingly before.

  He nodded. “I don’t really care about making anyone uncomfortable. Not anymore.”

  So he took my backpack for me and marched right up the steps beside me. I almost had the urge to knock, but stopped and opened the door instead. I didn’t even pause to say hello to anyone. I went right up the stairs, and Linden followed.

  My bedroom was in the same state as the last time I’d been in it. I stood there for a moment, feeling alien as Linden quietly shut the door behind me.

  “That wasn’t so bad,” he muttered, putting the backpack on the floor beside the bed. I laughed weakly and turned to him, that anxious monster flaring up in my chest.

  “Are you driving out now?” I asked.

  “Nah, I think I’ll hang around a little. I have to make a bunch of phone calls, make sure everyone knows I’m coming. Probably around noon or so.”

  I nodded, figuring it would be easier to get the pain over with quickly. Tear the bandage off fast.

  He stepped forward and put his hands on my shoulders. I kept my eyes on his arm, staring at the blue waves of ink.

  “Hey,” he said softly so I looked at him. “Don’t look so upset.”

  “I’m not—sorry,” I replied, aware that my eyes were filling with tears. It was mostly caused by the extreme feeling of dread coming on.

  “You’ll get tired of me calling,” he said matter-of-factly. “And then you’ll ask me to give you some space when I get back.”

  “That’s highly doubtful,” I replied. He laughed and lifted my chin, lips just brushing lightly. “I’ll miss you.”

  My lips quivered, and I bit down to stop it. I clung onto his shirt as I agreed. He smoothed away the fallen tears, kissing my forehead as he pulled away. This was it, the good bye, the final second of seeing him for—how long?

  He gently pulled my hands off him and walked towards the door. He gave me a long look before he stepped out, closing the door behind him. I felt pathetic standing there with empty hands, and I listened to him leave and felt his presence fade as he drove away. That’s when the beast of anxiety and fear exploded in my chest and fell from my cheeks in droplets.

  FAÇADE

  I all but lost myself when Alysana walked in, sympathy all over her face. She didn’t quiet understand what was the huge deal until I tried to tell her.

  “You know the feeling, don’t you? Just that thing like something bad is going to happen,” I explained through hiccups.

  She nodded slowly. “Yeah, I do. But—well what do you think is going to happen?” she asked, sitting next to me on the bed.

  “I don’t know … maybe that he won’t come back. He said he would but his instinct—I bet that’s hard to ignore.”

  “The instinct to move?” I nodded. “I thought he was settling down here though?”

  “That was what he told Sharon and other people who live here, but he’s a drifter, I’ve known that since the beginning. He’s used to moving around a lot, that’s what he does. And maybe I’m not enough to keep him here.”

  “Don’t doubt yourself so much, Riley, sheesh,” Aly said.

  “Okay, then I’m going to listen to this feeling. I need to—I need to go with him.”

  Alysana just looked at me for a long time. “Right. But he won’t let you.”

  “I know,” I said, impatient. “So there has to be another way. I could just follow him in one of the cars.”

  “He’d notice. If he didn’t see you he’d feel you. And you might lose him when you stop for gas,” she pointed out.

  I slumped. “Yeah.”

  We both sat there thinking for a moment, when Aly suddenly perked up. “Wait—what kind of car does he have?”

  “Car? Um, I don’t know, some kind of—”

  “Does he have a trunk?”

  “A trunk? I—” And then I caught on. “Yes! He does!”

  Alysana stood in excitement. “This might be hard, but it could work for a little while. You could just tag along in his trunk for a while, and when he finds you it might be too late to take you back.”

  “Wait, wait,” I said, feeling defeat coming on. “He’ll still feel me there even more than if I was in a car a few miles behind him.”

  Aly tapped her lips in thought. “There’s got to be a way around it.”

  She told me to stay put as she left the room, hurrying downstairs to who knows where. I sat there for a minute, thinking over how this would play out. Of course it would all seem easy when I was in the car, but getting there was half the trouble. He said he was leaving around twelve, and I could only hope he would be at home so I could get to the car. And how would he not see me? There were so many details to work out in so little time.

  Alysana returned after a few seconds, breathless as she held a tiny book to her chest. My eyes widened. “Is that—”

  “Yes. She once told me where she kept the key.”

  It was Rene’s prized book of the stranger spells in the world. She always had it locked up in a small cabinet in the living room along with other books she claimed none of us could see until we were ‘mature’. Eighteen counted as mature, didn’t it?

  We both sat against my bedroom door as she opened the small volume. “There has to be some kind of masking spell in this.”

  “A what?”

  “Something to cover up your aura. It can’t be that uncommon, I mean I’m sure a lot of people have wanted to hide from someone before,” she said, flipping pages quickly. They gave off the smell of old book, the rich scent of age. The pages were flimsy and almost transparent, but A
lysana still went through without much caution for its fragility. Five minutes went by without success, and she finally stopped and jabbed her finger into a title. “Aha.”

  All it said was Façade.

  “That’s it?” I asked, leaning to get a better look at the lettering.

  “Yes, I bet it is,” she replied, scanning quickly. “I hope we have all of this.”

  She listed off the herbs on her fingers, counting out seven that needed to be burned in the same shell.

  “We’re missing one,” she announced after a minute.

  “Is that going to ruin it?” I asked, anxiously biting my nails.

  “Honestly, I have no clue. It can’t hurt you, so why not?” She handed me the book as she stood, saying she was going into the greenhouse.

  “Rene isn’t up yet; long night. So stay hidden while you can,” she said before she left.

  This I could definitely agree with. While I waited, I read what the book had to say about the spell itself. It would hide my aura completely from anyone who could ever detect it, human or not. This was good, and it gave me a swelling of confidence and excitement while I waited. I could stop anything from happening.

  Ten minutes passed and Aly finally returned, her arms full of a bundle of both fresh and dried plants and roots. Under her arm was a spare shell.

  “Here, go by the window,” she said. I stood and followed, sitting on the floor under the window. “We should air out the room once this is done.”

  “Good idea,” I muttered.

  She put the shell down and asked for the book, carefully rereading the order that the herbs should be burned. She handed me a book of matches as she eyeballed the right amount to use. My heart started to thud in my chest.

  “Aly?”

  “Yeah?” She was barely listening, pinching off leaves and tossing them in.

  “Thank you for doing this. I really mean it. If you ever need anything from me just—”

  “Of course I would help you, Ri. It’s not even a question of favors,” she said. I smiled appreciatively and followed her order to light the first match.

  The smell was thick and suffocating as the smoke came up, and Alysana rushed to push a rug against the bottom of my door. She came back and picked up the book, mouthing the instructions.

  “Okay, first step,” she sighed. “Close your eyes so the smoke won’t burn.”

  I did as she said as she fanned the smoke across my face, using the book. I wrinkled my nose at the smell, but breathed in deeply when she told me to.

  I could hear her adding more herbs. “Stand up.”

  I did as she said, and she covered the rest of me with the smoke while I heard the barely discernable words coming from her mouth.

  “Okay, we’re done,” she said after a minute. “Now open the window, this stuff really smells.”

  I opened both windows as we tried to get the smell out. Alysana ran to the bathroom with the smoldering ashes and dumped them in the toilet. I didn’t feel different at all, just a little woozy from the strong smell.

  “We have to test this out,” I said when she came back.

  “Yeah,” she agreed. “I’m going to put the book back, but while I’m gone go somewhere—anywhere in the house, and I’ll see if I can feel you.”

  I nodded, wondering where to go. I shouldn’t stay in my room in case she happened to guess where I was. When I heard her go down the stairs, I walked into the hall, silent as I debated where to go. The closed door beside my bedroom seemed like a logical choice.

  Omar’s room was stifling. It looked the same as it usually had, clothes and comics everywhere. The air smelled stale, and I felt completely intrusive. It felt wrong to be here. I drifted over to the desk, looking down at the sketches. Ironically enough, there was one of me on top of the stack. I was wearing the red dress from my ceremony. He had exaggerated something; I looked older. My heart racing, I reached out and crumpled the drawing with one hand.

  I couldn’t stand being in there for long. When I decided Alysana had long enough, I walked out, wondering where she was. I felt her downstairs, and I met her halfway on the stairs.

  She smiled at me. “It works. I couldn’t find you at all, not even a trace.”

  “Really?” I couldn’t believe it.

  “You’re in the clear,” she said. “Now: details.”

  We spent the next hour figuring things out. By the time I thought I was really ready, it was almost noon. I’d gone over details in my head again and again, and Alysana made sure my cell phone was charged.

  “If anything happens, you know who to call,” she said. I nodded, confidence overflowing. I was ready.

  We made it out of the house without being seen by Rene. Alysana walked me down the road until we were walking right along the swamp, staying close to the trees as Linden’s house approached.

  “I should turn back,” Aly said nervously. “He’ll feel me and wonder what’s going on.”

  “You’re right,” I admitted, adjusting my backpack. I took a deep breath. “Don’t worry. I’ll be okay.”

  She smiled and hugged me quickly. “I know. Now hurry up before he leaves.”

  I nodded and said goodbye for now, hurrying in the direction of his house. I hope it wasn’t the last time I would see her.

  My heart was hammering at an alarming rate as I approached the house. I had come through the trees close to his drive and his car wasn’t far. The back door was open, exposing a few boxes he had shoved inside. Hopefully he hadn’t filled the trunk.

  I paused, trying to feel where he was. What an advantage this spell was, having no one being able to feel me but still having the freedom to find them. I found he was in the attic, near the back to be precise. There were no windows there, and I quickly ran for the car.

  I halted at the back, using my will to pop the lock. The trunk lifted easily, and I was relieved to see it was empty and pretty spacious. I dropped my bag in and then climbed in after it, pulling the trunk shut over me.

  The darkness was pressing at first, but my eyes adjusted fast. As Alysana had said, I searched for the armrest to the backseat. When I found it, I pushed it a little as a bar of light came in along with fresh air. This was all too perfect. All there was to do now was wait.

  Even that didn’t take long. After a few minutes of listening to my own breathing, I heard the front door close. I froze, listening to Linden’s voice as he spoke into the phone.

  “ … Yeah I got everything he wanted. Just one more box left,” he was saying. I heard the box rattle as he shoved it into the passenger seat. The car rocked slightly as he got in a shut the door.

  “Come on, you know I don’t drive the limit. What’s the norm? Ten? I’ll be there in eight.”

  I was still tense, waiting for him to suddenly realize there was someone—me—in the trunk. But nothing out of the ordinary happened. He hung up the phone and turned on the car, revving out of his driveway and across the bumping road. I tried to keep still as he rumbled over the dirt, but I hit my head a few times on the old plastic, hissing through my teeth. When he pulled onto the normal road, things were better, and the engine hummed quietly as he sped onto the highway.

  So far everything had gone as I had hoped. Eight hours in a trunk wasn’t something I was looking forward to, but I kept my face close to the opening to the backseat, getting a good flow of cold air. Linden probably wouldn’t have been able to hear me if I spoke at a low tone. He turned on the radio and let the speakers blare. I didn’t mind and smiled to myself as I tried to relax. What would happen when my spell wore off, I could only guess, but for now I was safe.

  GREETINGS

  I don’t know how long I stayed awake with my thoughts, but it seemed like a long stretch of time. Nothing changed from my space in the trunk. I pulled my backpack under my head for more comfort and moved away from the wall of the backseat, getting a little more comfortable. Since there was nothing to see, I got tired fast and quickly gave in to sleep.

  As usual, I dreame
d. It seemed like I’d had the dream before. The swamps were the same, and again I walked naked through the moss. Someone was following me, and when I looked back, I could see Linden between the branches. I laughed and ran; keep-away.

  When I paused to stand on a fallen tree he caught up with me, holding me from behind. I watched his tattooed hands moved up my body, stopping at my temples. This time, there was no sudden headache, but I could smell burning herbs very strongly. It was the same smell as the façade smoke.

  “You made it,” the dream Linden said, turning me around. I couldn’t see much of him but his eyes, and I noticed that all around us, the swamp was burning. The flames traveled up the thin trees, consumed the moss in a simple whisper. I didn’t feel the heat and just felt Linden there, cool and strong. I was going to say something—something important, when my head hit something very hard.

  I opened my eyes as the rest of my body followed, slamming against the backseat. My head had cracked against the metal spot of the car as the whole thing came to a violent stop. I was completely disoriented; it was pitch black, the sound of wind rushing by had stopped, and the music was off as well. I held my head tight, the spot that hit hardest throbbing painfully.

  One of the car doors opened and slammed shut. I opened my eyes, suddenly afraid. Maybe he was checking something in the back …

  But it just wasn’t my luck. I heard the keys in the lock over the trunk and it flung open as orange light spilled down on me. My eyes squinted shut, and after a moment I was brave enough to look up.

  Linden looked confused. He stared at me, at my backpack, and finally spoke.

  “How did you get here?”

  I scrambled to sit up, still holding my head with one hand. “I—I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

  He held up a hand, which silenced my instantly. “I don’t want to know right now.” I climbed out and he shut the trunk. “Get in.”

  He went to the driver’s side as I briefly looked around. He had slammed to a halt in the middle of a street in town. It was dark out, and I couldn’t even tell what time it was.

  I slowly walked to the passenger side, which he had cleared for me. Sitting down, I buckled in and couldn’t even bring myself to look at him. He started driving again, pulling over a few streets down in front of a diner. He got out, and I took it as a cue to follow.