Born in the Shadows (In the Shadows Series Book 1)

by Courtney McPhail

  The crystal sang as they touched the glasses together and both men downed the liquor before going for round two.

  Demetri sat down on the stool next to him, swirling around the amber liquid in his glass.

  “It shouldn’t have been her. I wish to hell anyone else had been in the hall when he came in. Not that I could pick someone to take her place, it’s just that Olivia was too kind. Anyone else would have been suspicious of him coming inside but not Olivia. She always believed the best in everyone, friends and strangers alike. She was a great woman.”

  “I wish I had a chance to know her better,” Gabe said and he meant it. Anyone who could inspire as much love as he’d seen from everyone tonight was a person worth knowing.

  Demetri just nodded, his eyes affixed on his glass, lost in his own thoughts. Gabe let him be, knowing that there were no words he could offer that would help.

  Sure there were the common platitudes that people offered in these kinds of situations but everyone knew they were empty words. Demetri didn’t seem like the kind of guy who needed to be patronized with those bullshit lines.

  “There is going to be an investigation into what happened tonight. Isaac is going to want to get your statement,” Demetri finally spoke after a few minutes of silence had passed.

  “Who’s Isaac?”

  “He’s the Enforcer. He works for the High Council. He’s the Shadow Walker version of a police force.”

  “You have just one guy policing all of you?”

  Demetri chuckled. “When you meet him, you’ll understand why we only need one of him.”

  “I’ve got no problem talking to him. Anything to make sure he gets that Armand guy and makes him pay.”

  Demetri nodded his head in approval before topping up both their glasses. “So, I gotta ask, since the self hatred is pouring off of you in waves, what the hell did you do?”

  Gabe cursed silently. He kept forgetting that he was hanging around a bunch of mind readers.

  “It’s nothing,” he said, trying to brush it off but Demetri just raised an eyebrow in skepticism. “All right, all right. I pissed off Cordelia and now I feel like an asshole. Which makes me sound fucking pathetic considering all the bad shit that happened to you guys tonight. Just forget I said anything, I don’t need to be putting my shit on your shoulders when you are dealing with much heavier stuff.”

  “Hey, I’d rather be talking about your problems instead of thinking about Olivia. Distractions are good at times like these. So what did you do to piss her off?”

  He thought about trying to blow Demetri off with another excuse but he figured that wouldn’t work. And if the guy wanted to take his mind off his own shit, who was Gabe to deny him? Besides, maybe getting some input from another Shadow Walker would help him sort out what to do about Cordelia.

  Gabe gave Demetri the short version of what had happened upstairs, avoiding any mention of the hot and heavy action part of it, wanting some things between him and Cordelia to stay private.

  Demetri sat back and seemed to let the story settle in his brain before shrugging his shoulders. “I wouldn’t sweat it so much. Just apologize and things will be fine.”

  Gabe snorted and downed some more whiskey. He could feel the alcohol finally beginning to warm his belly and soften the harsh light and angles of the room.

  “Easy for you to say.”

  “If she told you she’d never feed from you again, would you still be here?”

  Gabe didn’t even have to think about it. “Yes.”

  “Then just tell her that and you guys will be good.”

  “You didn’t see how pissed off she was at me. I don’t know if she’ll forgive me.”

  “Look, even without being changed into a Shadow Walker, Cordy has been through a lot. Two men have tried to kill her in the last two weeks. She left behind her old life and gained a brand new family that is now being attacked. It’s a hell of a lot for anyone to take. Then add in the emotional rollercoaster that is becoming a Shadow Walker and you got nuclear-bomb-level emotions ready to go off. Unfortunately you were in the blast zone when she went off so you got the full force of it.”

  He hadn’t thought about it like that and it made him even angrier with himself. He should have been offering her a platonic shoulder for support, not pawing her like a fucking animal and then trying to use her to get himself off. Nothing said stand-up guy like preying on a woman when she was vulnerable.

  “She’s definitely never going to talk to me again,” Gabe lamented and Demetri rolled his eyes.

  “What are you, sixteen? Grow a pair, man. Okay sure, you acted like a complete jackass.”

  Gabe winced. “Thanks for that.”

  Demetri clapped him on the shoulder, grinning widely. “Just hitting you with the truth, man. The point is, despite acting like a jackass, she’s not going to be pissed at you forever. Just give her some space and time to cool off. Shit’s going to be crazy here the next few days so that should be easy. Oh, and best not to offer her your vein again. That seemed to really piss her off.”

  “Asshole.”

  “Got it in one,” Demetri said smiling broadly.

  Gabe watched the liquid swirl around his glass and thought about what Demetri had said. He knew that the man was right but the thought of giving her space had the ball of anxiety growing in his gut.

  The image of Cordy sitting next to Zeke at the pool, laughing at whatever stupid thing he had said flashed through his mind. Yep, bad feeling all around.

  “She doesn’t have any interest in him.”

  Gabe’s head shot up and he pinned Demetri with an angry glare. “You need to stay the fuck out of my head.”

  Demetri held up his hands in defence. “I can’t help it. You’re radiating a crazy combo of jealousy and desire with a territorial-vibe kicker. It’s pretty easy to guess what is going through your mind. Plus Mary totally blabbed about your convo at the pool earlier.”

  “So does that mean you are going to blab about this to her?”

  “Hell yeah.”

  Gabe glared at Demetri who just shrugged his shoulders. “Hey man, after all the shit that came down tonight, a little light-hearted gossip is good for the soul.”

  Gabe thought back to cleaning up Olivia’s blood and he realized that worrying about what happened with Cordy had erased that horrific memory from his thoughts for a little bit. Hell, he was traumatized and he had barely known the woman. If his screwed up love life could bring some amusement to the people who had known her then he was more than willing to be the butt of the joke.

  “All right, I’ll be your entertainment if you tell me how you know that Cordy doesn’t have any interest in Zeke.”

  “Because I read her thoughts to see if she did.”

  “I thought you guys didn’t do that.”

  Demetri shrugged his shoulders. “I’m like her big brother now so I needed to know if I had to give him the whole ’You hurt her and I’ll kill you’ speech. Thank God she doesn’t have any interest in him ‘cause that bastard has two hundred years on me and a hell of a left hook that he has no problem using liberally.”

  Gabe felt as if a thousand pound weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He also couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot.

  Demetri looked him up and down before shaking his head and laughing. “Damn, you’ve got it bad, man.”

  “No arguments here,” Gabe said before tossing back the last of his whiskey. He set the glass down on the bar and then raised his arms to stretch and he couldn’t help yawning widely.

  “Want me to show you to a room where you can crash for the day?”

  “Sounds good.”

  The sooner he went to sleep, the sooner he would wake up to a new night and hopefully by then Cordy would be willing to accept his apology.

  ***

  Cordelia descended the main staircase at sunset, reluctant to leave the safety of her room. When she was behind those walls, she could pretend that everything that happened last night wa
s just a dream. She could imagine that when she went out that door, Olivia would be alive, Gabe wouldn’t be mad at her and everyone would be happy.

  Unfortunately, she couldn’t deny reality forever. Anne had knocked on her door a little bit before sundown and told her that they would be having Olivia’s funeral as soon as the sun set. She had gotten dressed reluctantly, not ready to face anyone but knowing she had no choice.

  She found everyone in the conservatory gathered around the glass sliding doors that led out to the back garden. She hesitated in the doorway, studying their black clothes and sombre faces.

  Anne had a death grip on a white handkerchief, twisting the fabric tight between her hands while Demetri stood next to her, a reassuring arm around her. Nicky was at the windows, staring out at the darkness, his mind far away from the conservatory.

  Giovanni was adjusting the pink lily he pinned on the lapel of his jacket and Cordelia couldn’t help but smile. It was Olivia’s favourite flower and the older man wanted to make sure it sat perfectly.

  Marcus was stone faced and Gabe stood next to him, dressed in a black suit he must have borrowed from Marcus, judging by how tight it was in the shoulders and how the cuffs of the pants hit above his ankles.

  Mary stood off by herself, arms crossed protectively over her chest, eyes on the floor. Her anger was palpable and it surrounded her like a dark storm cloud. It was that anger that terrified Cordelia more than anything and kept her in the doorway. If that anger was turned on her, she knew that she would break. She knew she deserved it but she could not face it. Which made her a coward on top of a murderer.

  Mary’s head came up and she looked to the doorway, their eyes meeting and holding. As Cordelia stood there holding her breath, Mary unfolded herself and walked over to stand before her. Cordelia braced herself for the tirade of hate that she knew she deserved but Mary simply embraced her.

  They held each other in silence as there was nothing that needed to be said. There was no blame here, just the sharing of their mutual grief. Mary pulled back and linked her arm with Cordelia’s and, at her urging, they joined the rest of the group.

  Nicky glanced back at them and seeing they were all assembled, he wordlessly opened the doors and led them outside. As they walked to the back garden, Cordelia caught her first glimpse of the wooden pyre that had been constructed in the centre of the manicured lawn.

  The scent of gasoline that coated the pyre overpowered the fragrance of the garden’s night blooms and the flowers that had been placed around Olivia’s body.

  When Anne had come to her room earlier, she had given her a brief description of their kind’s funeral rites. Shadow Walkers were left out to burn at dawn, their ashes offered up to the day that had scorned them. Datores Sanguis were set on fire on a pyre at sunset, their ashes offered up to the night that they had embraced. After a few words, Nicky would light the pyre and Olivia’s body would be laid to rest.

  “Who built it?” Cordelia asked, looking at the pyre and the pile of discarded lumber nearby.

  “Marcus and Gabe. They spent all day on it,” Mary told her, her voice full of admiration for the two men.

  Cordelia glanced down the line at Gabe, wanting to go to him and thank him but now was not the time. They had reached the pyre and the assembled group stood in a semi circle around it. Nicky moved to stand before the pyre, gazing up at Olivia for a moment before turning to face the assembled group.

  “We are gathered here this night to honour the life of our Olivia. Though she lived a long life, she was still taken from us too soon. She devoted herself to our clan and there is not enough we can do to repay that devotion. All we can do is vow to bring her murderer to justice and to honour her by committing her body back to the earth in our kind’s tradition. I promise you, Olivia, we will never forget you.”

  One by one, each member of the clan went to stand before the pyre, taking one last moment to say their goodbyes and honour Olivia in their own way. Giovanni signed the cross, fingering his rosary as he whispered a prayer. Anne broke, heart-wrenching sobs wracking her body and Demetri stepped forward to pull her into his arms, his strength holding her up as she collapsed against him.

  Mary went before the pyre and spent a silent moment staring at Olivia before she pulled a silver blade from her pocket and sliced across the meat of her palm. The scent of fresh blood wafted on the night breeze as Mary let it pool in her palm before she reached up and placed her bloody palm over Olivia’s heart, murmuring something to her. Mary said nothing as she walked back to join the group and nodded for Cordelia to take her turn.

  She looked at the shroud that covered Olivia, letting her memories of Olivia’s smiling face surface. She had been a wonderful woman, so kind to Cordelia even when she had been a virtual stranger. And that kindness had been repaid with a death sentence.

  Tears sprung to her eyes and she tried to swallow the lump that had formed in her throat.

  “I am…I am so sorry,” she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion. “I promise I will do whatever has to be done to make Armand pay. Rest in peace, Olivia.”

  She walked back to the group, tears streaming down her cheeks but she did not try to wipe them away. It was no use, she wasn’t sure if her tears would ever stop falling.

  Nicky picked up an old-fashioned torch and lit the gasoline soaked end, the mass of treated fabric burning bright. He took one last look at Olivia before he held the torch to the bottom of the pyre. A loud whooshing sound filled the night as flames shot up around the pyre, the fuel burning hotly.

  Everyone watched the flames grow, obscuring Olivia’s body as the burning wood began to snap and crackle in the silence of the night. Cordelia watched as sparks shot into the sky with each crack, the orange pinpoints rising high into the sky until they burned themselves out.

  Just like a human life, she thought. Burning bright in the beginning before dying out, the whole thing over so quickly.

  She was pulled from her morose thoughts when she realized that the group was beginning to break up. The flames continued to dance but Olivia was finally at rest. The fire would eventually burn itself out and the scorched earth would serve as Olivia’s headstone.

  Giovanni made the offer of food and Demetri agreed enthusiastically but Cordelia suspected it wasn’t from hunger but Demetri’s desire to give Giovanni something to do. Anne went with them, Mary following close behind.

  Marcus ignored all of them, sitting down on the grass, his gaze steady on the fire. Nicky stood behind him, his hand on his shoulder, offering comfort but not invading on his grief.

  For the first time since she had seen them together earlier, Gabe left Marcus’ side, leaving him in Nicky’s hands and headed towards her.

  “Hey.”

  His voice and stance told her he was cautious approaching her and she felt horrible all over again for her earlier meltdown. He hadn’t deserved her anger last night. She had been the one to introduce him to this world that could be so captivating for humans. She couldn’t fault him for falling under its spell.

  Seeing him here, knowing that he had spent his day helping build Olivia’s final resting place heaped more guilt on the pile. There was no denying that he cared. He wouldn’t be here if he didn’t.

  “Thank you for being here,” she said. “It means a lot to me.”

  He looked up quickly and his eyes showed his relief. “You don’t need to thank me. I wanted to be here.”

  His words caused a lump to grow in her throat and she wanted to say something to tell him how sorry she was for lashing out at him but she couldn’t find the right words. She looked back to the smoking pyre, the one that Gabe had spent the day building for her family instead of sleeping.

  “You helped Marcus build it. Why?”

  “The room Demetri gave me faced out this way. I tried to go to sleep but I could hear Marcus working out here.”

  “That didn’t mean you had to help him,” she pointed out. “You could have gone to another bedroom. There are plen
ty of them.”

  He shrugged his shoulders, as if all of it was no big deal. “It looked like too big of a job for one person so I came out and offered to help.”

  There were dark circles under his eyes and the lines around his mouth were deeper than usual. His exhaustion was evident and she realized that he had been awake for a solid twenty-four hours, if not longer.

  Yet he had not only stood here and paid his respects to Olivia and her family, he had worked hard all day to make sure she could be laid to rest as quickly as possible. And somehow, she knew that he would stay awake for as long as they needed him.

  He sighed wearily and seemed to steel himself for what he was about to say.

  “Look, I know this isn’t exactly the best time but I want you to know that I’m sorry for last night.”

  “Forget it,” she said quickly. “Just forget it ever happened. You didn’t do anything wrong. I took out my issues on you.”

  “No, Cordelia I screwed up and--”

  “Don’t Gabe, please don’t apologize. What you did today for my family, I can’t thank you enough. You didn’t have to do any of this.”

  “Yes I did,” he said simply. And she could see it in his eyes; he did have to do this. He understood the pain that they were all feeling. He had wanted to help them not because he wanted to get something out of it but because he knew the grief and he wanted to ease it for all of them.

  “You are a good man, Gabe Carrington.”

  “I try,” he said, cracking a half smile and she smiled in return. He opened his mouth to say something else but before he could speak, a yawn took over.

  “You’re exhausted. You need to get some rest,” she told him.

  “Nah, I’m good.”

  “You haven’t slept in over a day. You’re going to end up collapsing on us. Come on,” she said.

  She brought him into the house and led him up to her room, where there were clothes scattered over the bed from her earlier debate over what to wear. She quickly gathered them up and tossed them unceremoniously in her closet as Gabe discarded his suit jacket, the necktie following close behind.