Protect and Serve: Soldiers, SEALs and Cops: Contemporary Heroes from NY Times and USA Today and other bestselling authors

by J. M. Madden

  “In the meantime,” Lee went on. “Why not take advantage of the house being empty? I’m sure you and Nash could use some downtime.”

  “It’s only been two days.” Her heart skipped a few times at the thought of what they’d do in their downtime.

  “Exactly. He’s not the only one keeping secrets.”

  Oh, shit. He knew. She didn’t want anyone knowing. How the hell did he find out? She darted a quick look Nash’s way. He watched her closely, carefully, and must have caught the trouble in her expression. He frowned as his watch grew more intense. “Who else knows?”

  “Only the ones who need to. Talk to him, Mike. I know it’s not your forte, but you were with the man for a few years. You were going to marry him. You suffered a loss with him. Don’t push him away. Don’t cut him out of your life again. You need him as much as he needs you.”

  “You don’t even know me.” Yet, he’d nailed it, all the way down to her needing Nash in her life.

  “Don’t I? I’ve only spent two days with you, and I’m pretty sure I know you better than you know yourself. You think you’re the first rookie TREX has dropped in my lap trying to run from her past? I see it every day. You have the golden opportunity to make it right. Most don’t get that chance. Don’t waste it.”

  “Sir, I—Hello?” She dropped the phone on the seat. “He hung up on me.”

  “What’d he say?” Nash hadn’t lost that stern look of concern clouding his eyes.

  “The rendezvous isn’t until six.”

  “Six? What the hell are we supposed to do until then?”

  She had a few ideas. “Are you hungry?”

  “Starving.”

  “Swing up to the house. TREX stocked the kitchen full of food. We can make something.”

  “Swing by?” He laughed. “Madison Park isn’t exactly on our way.”

  “Agent Lee said for us to head to the house and wait.” She omitted the rest of the lecture.

  Nash narrowed his gaze. “What aren’t you telling me?”

  “Me? Nothing?” She plastered a smile on her face.

  “Uh huh. You’re a terrible liar.” He turned around and headed north. After several minutes of silence, he circled back to the topic they hadn’t settled and that she’d avoided. “I don’t blame you for what happened.”

  “Can we not do this right now?” She fisted her hair to keep the majority of it from whipping her in the face, thanks to the windows being down. For them to dig into what really needed to be said, they needed to be alone, no distractions. Not on the Seattle freeway with the wind so loud they had to shout to be heard. “Let’s just wait until we get to the house, okay?”

  “Fair enough.” He stayed silent the rest of the drive and pulled up to the curb. After putting the car into park, he killed the engine. “We’re here.”

  “That, we are.” Why would she be nervous? She’d spent the last day and a half with him. Hell, she’d spent the better part of almost three years with him. With no reason to stay in the car and roast to their death, she stepped out and hurried to the house. Maybe if she changed into something different. She’d spotted a bunch of sundresses in the closet last night. She wasn’t much of a dress person, but for Nash, she wanted to be.

  Running up the stairs to the master bedroom, she made a beeline for the closet. She kicked off her shoes and pants, and did a quick scan of the clothes. There had to be something in here that looked sexy, yet didn’t look like she tried too hard.

  “Where’d you go?” he called from downstairs.

  She ignored him and lifted two dresses up next to each other, hating them both. There was a blue one in here. Where the hell was it?

  “Did you know you tend to hold your breath when you’re excited?” He appeared in the doorway, scaring the hell out of her.

  She paused and glanced at him over the hangers. “Excuse me?”

  “It’s one of your tells.”

  “What would you know about any of my tells?”

  His chocolate eyes danced wickedly as he tipped his lips into a grin and leaned against the wall with his shoulder. “Do you really need me to answer that?”

  “I need you to go away so I can change.”

  “No, you need to relax.”

  Her breath caught at the thought of what he meant by that comment. He used to say the same thing right before he’d drive her wild and give her a mind-blowing orgasm worthy of a double digit on the Richter scale. “Nash…”

  “I know you,” he explained as he pushed off the wall. “And I know why you’re running around crazy. Why you’re running at all. It’s time to stop running, baby. It’s time for both of us to stop running.”

  “Who says I’m running?” She lowered her gaze, too scared if she looked at him she’d give in to the idea of him doing whatever it took to relax her.

  “I do.”

  When he placed a hand on her arm, she couldn’t stop herself from looking at him. Shivering from his touch, she faced him. His lips captured hers in a kiss that would have knocked her shoes off had she not already removed them.

  Mike dropped the dresses and moaned into his mouth. His tongue stabbed through her lips and sent a rush of fiery pulses straight to her core. Her insides twisted in an all-consuming passion that had her panting.

  The breath tore from her lungs as she urgently clawed at him to get her hands under his shirt. She had to touch him, to feel the tickle of his flesh against her palms. She had to weave her fingers into his hair and hold him close against her.

  Her desperation had her shaking with aching need. His leg came out and parted hers. His thigh notched perfectly up against the fragile material of her silk panties.

  When he lifted her and carried her over to the bed, she didn’t even think to protest. He set her down and had his shirt off in one swift movement. Her silk shirt hung on her shoulders after he slowly, painfully took his time unbuttoning it. His lips continued to devour hers and render her helpless to do anything more than greedily kiss him back.

  Her top slid from her body, followed by her bra. She needed Nash to touch her, love her, and break her from this agonizing longing she’d carried around since their last time together.

  Years of pent-up frustration, of longing for doing exactly this, fueled their urgency. Mike leaned back and fought to catch her breath as Nash dove for her now exposed breasts. When he took a hard nipple into his mouth, she cried out and bit her lip.

  Weaving her fingers into his hair, she pulled him close and held him against her. He teased and nibbled until she cried out again. Air raced in and out of her lungs, yet she couldn’t catch her breath.

  He slipped his hand below her waist and easily pushed the fabric of her panties aside to gain access. “Jesus, Mike. You’re drowning down here.” He groaned as he trailed wet kisses up her chest, her throat, her jaw.

  “Your fault,” she said into his mouth. He licked at her lower lip, driving her crazy with his teasing ways. “Please, Nash.”

  “I’ve missed you,” he said and removed his slacks to reveal his engorged flesh. Dear God, he was absolutely beautiful.

  Holding himself above her, he lodged himself between her legs and had her wrap her legs around his waist. “I wish we had more time, but you have me so damned close already.”

  “We will next time. We have all day.”

  He grinned. Without hesitation, he thrust his hips and drove his cock deep inside her. She would have screamed and let the rest of the neighborhood know exactly what they were doing if he hadn’t taken that exact moment to cover her mouth with his.

  “I’ve missed you so much.” He nibbled at her lips.

  “Oh, Nash.” She wanted to cry out. How long had she wanted this? How many times had she spent night after night with her vibrator, wishing it were Nash instead of batteries?

  She dug her nails into his chest. He hissed and plunged deep inside her in retaliation. The propulsion pushed her upward on the bed. She wrapped her arms around him and held on.

 
; He built a steady rhythm with his thrusts. She whimpered as her orgasm sparked to life inside her, twisting in her womb. Her walls fisted around him. She bit down on his shoulder to stop herself from crying out.

  “Jesus, woman. That fucking hurts.”

  “So does not seeing you for too long.” She thrust up against him to gain the friction against her clit she desperately needed, digging her heels into his ass to increase it even more. “Lift me higher, Nash.”

  “Brace for liftoff,” he growled and painfully nipped at the cords of her neck. She winced. He licked the spot and then blew on it to cool down the heat it produced.

  “Oh, Nash.” She swallowed and threw her head back. He took advantage of the position and dove for her neck, consuming it with his lips and tongue. He found the sensitive spot behind her ear and really drove her wild.

  She was close, so very close. If he so much as…

  He plunged deep. She grabbed the blankets for purchase as her orgasm slammed into her and sent her bucking wildly. Crying into his mouth, she rode out her climax as Nash pumped into her over and over, unrelenting in his need for release. He stiffened and shouted into her mouth as he came deep inside her. Mike rocked her hips, dragging out the last moment.

  “Goddamn,” Nash muttered as he rolled to his back, panting. “That was too fast.”

  She blew out breath after breath, trying to regain some sense of composure. “Did I hold my breath?”

  “A little.” He chuckled and sat up, pulling her with him. “Now that we have that out of the way, it’s time.”

  “For?”

  “We have a lot of making up to do before the meet.”

  “I need a shower.”

  “I’ll wash your back.” He chased her into the bathroom.

  * * *

  Nash relaxed on the back terrace, the house creating the perfect amount of shade. The slight breeze kept the temperature down enough for him to enjoy being outside without melting. It was uncharacteristic for Seattle to be this hot for this long. He kicked back on the chair and sipped at the tea he found in the fridge. Thank God it wasn’t sweet tea. He loved Mary but couldn’t stand her tea. It was like drinking straight sugar.

  Sighing, he studied the yard. It looked a hell of a lot different than the yard they’d left this morning. Perfectly groomed, all the way down to the edging. Another reason Nash lived in an apartment. He didn’t have time to deal with the upkeep of a yard, as Kristen’s neglected lawn confirmed.

  Odd how a tinge of regret twisted in his gut. Why now? He didn’t want a house this big, a yard this pristine. He wanted a modest home with a big enough backyard to fence and maybe hold a few barbeques. If he had something like that, with someone to share it with, he’d make the time to keep up the yard.

  Lifting his gaze to the cloudless sky, he sighed. He knew exactly why now. Being with Mike again after all this time brought back all the reasons he wanted the house. The yard. Even the fence. They’d been about to start a family, the first of tons of kids they both couldn’t wait to have together. They’d already picked out names even though it was too early to know the sex. Two more weeks and they’d know.

  When she called him crying—no, sobbing—from the doctor’s office, he’d raced across the city, not slowing until he barged into the room just as the nurse had turned off the ultrasound machine. “No heartbeat,” she’d told him. His entire world grew a little darker that day.

  The burn of emotions hovered right behind his eyes. He sucked in a sharp breath, wishing he could have done something for Mike. She’d cried for days. They both had. And then she was gone. He’d lost his baby and the woman he loved all in the span of a few months. Leaning forward, he folded his hands in front of him and lowered his head, staring at the ground until he recovered from the pain that memory brought with it.

  Her hand on his shoulder caught his attention. He blinked rapidly before lifting his head to rest his gaze on her. She smiled softly, lighting up those beautiful eyes. “Are you okay?”

  He nodded, not trusting his voice.

  “I can’t stop thinking about it, either.”

  “Come here.” He pulled her onto his lap, holding her tight against him. She didn’t resist and wrapped her arms around his neck. He buried his face in her hair and simply breathed. The emotions hovered right behind his eyes, burning them. He squeezed them closed, fighting to keep his control. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Michaela. I’m so sorry.”

  “Nash?” When she tried to push away, he wouldn’t let her go. He couldn’t let her go. “You’re shaking.”

  Shit. He didn’t want to breakdown, especially in front of her. He’d spent the better part of five years perfecting the callous playboy, love them and never call them again. No commitment. Not even a second date. That way he’d never have to deal with another loss.

  “It’s cold.”

  “It’s in the eighties,” she countered and pushed at his chest, succeeding at separating them enough to hold his gaze. “Talk to me.”

  He shook his head, unable to control the lump hovering right behind his vocal chords.

  “Talk to me or I beat it out of you.”

  He laughed. She always had that power over him, to pull him out of any mood. “How do we get past it?”

  “One day at a time.”

  “Together? Because, as God as my witness, I won’t make it if you walk away again.” He hated how weak he sounded. But, damn it, if they were going to have a future, they had to get over the past.

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Marry me.”

  She stiffened. When she tried to push off his lap, he held her there. “That escalated quickly.”

  “I’m serious, Mike.”

  “So am I.” She broke free of his grasp and jumped to her feet. “How about we start with not killing each other before this is all over?”

  “Then we talk marriage?”

  She laughed, the gesture lighting up his world once again. “Then we’ll talk about maybe dating again.”

  “I’ll break you down.”

  “I have no doubt.”

  “Come here.” He moved her legs to either side of his. Slipping his hand under her dress, he brushed his knuckle across the crux of her legs. The heat she generated burned into him, hardening his cock. He rolled his hips, pressing against her. She unfastened his slacks and pulled out his hard flesh. Holding her panties aside, he rested the tip of his erection against her moist entrance. When she sank down, her body taking him in and fisting him tight, he shuddered. “Jesus.”

  “This is a first for us.” She rocked her hips, sliding him in and out in slow, steady strokes.

  “Sweet, sweet Jesus.” He cupped her face and moved with her. The deliberate pace turned him on more than the speed sex they’d had when they first arrived. They’d started and finished faster than it took to make toast.

  But this? This was excruciating, the need to pump faster nearly blinding him. He let her set the pace. It may kill him, but he’d be damned if he took this from her.

  “Nash,” she whimpered, moving a little faster. He grabbed her hips and slowed her down, wanting this to last forever. She threw her head back and moaned into the warm summer day. “Nash.”

  He loved the sound of his name falling from her beautiful lips. She upped her pace, rocking faster as her breathing increased. Her body tightened around him, stroking him harder, deeper. Ah, hell. The sensation tightened in his balls, biting into his restraint. He fought it, fought taking control and thrusting into her until they both screamed.

  “Nash,” she whispered against his lips. He kept her panties out of the way and took advantage of the position by rolling his thumb over the swollen bundle of nerves driving her to climax. She cried out as he increased the pressure, the friction exactly what she needed. He knew her body.

  “Marry me. Marry me, Michaela Nicole Starr. Marry me.” He pumped faster, rubbing her clit in time with his thrusts. “Say yes, baby. Say you’ll marry me.”

&nbs
p; “Yes!” She cried out as her body fisted him. It triggered his own release. She held her forehead to his, whimpering and moaning as she rode out her orgasm. He thrust out his chin, taking her mouth with his and swallowing the remainder of her noises until they were a part of him.

  For several minutes, they stayed connected, their breaths mixing as they panted and waited to recover. Nash delivered kisses along her exposed neck and sexy shoulders.

  “I can’t move,” she confessed.

  “I’m pretty relaxed myself.”

  “No,” she corrected with a little more force in her voice. “I can’t move. I think I pulled something.”

  He couldn’t hold back the laugh that bubbled out. She smacked his chest, which only made him laugh harder when she winced. “Here, let me help.” She bit back a smile as he lifted her from him and set her on her feet before refastening his slacks. “Better?”

  “Ouch. It’s a groin muscle. How am I going to explain this?”

  “No one is going to know.”

  “Weber will.” She shook her head as pain pinched up her expression. “That guy notices everything.”

  “Calm down.” He rested his hands on her shoulders and looked deep into her dark eyes. “I’ll go find some sports rub.”

  “What if there isn’t any?”

  “Mike, take a breath. I’ll go buy some if I can’t find any.”

  She thrust out her lower lip. “I’m going to take an Epsom Salt bath.”

  “It’s almost ninety degrees.”

  “I’ll make it a cold one.” As she turned to limp inside, he moved to follow. “No. You stay. If you try to help, I may end up pulling the other one.” She walked away, muttering, “Ouch, ouch, ouch,” with every step on her right side.

  EIGHT

  Lee walked through the front door in beachcomber shorts and a tank top that would be loose on anyone else, but strained to cover him. He had on a ball cap with sunglasses resting on the brim. Mike had never seen him so relaxed. It threw her off seeing her handler in such casual civilian attire. It shouldn’t. Even TREX agents had a life outside the agency. “Change of plans. Sandra wants the barbeque moved to our place.”