Not My Hero: Black Mountain Academy

by Michelle Heard

  Really, Brie? You didn’t have to tell them you’re going to pee.

  I rush down the hallway.

  Ugh, kill me now.

  Once I shut the bathroom door behind me, I lean my forehead against it and suck in deep breaths to calm down.

  What was that?

  I’ve always felt awkward around people, but that was different.

  I rub a hand over my excited heartbeat and draw my bottom lip between my teeth.

  You’re just thankful. That’s probably all it is.

  Pushing away from the door, my eyes catch my reflection as I pass the mirror. I stop dead in my tracks, and my eyes grow huge as I take in how awful I look.

  My stomach drops to my feet, and as my eyes flit over the haphazard strands of what’s left of my hair, my heart grows heavy.

  I look ugly.

  I was too upset last night to care about my appearance, but now that I’ve calmed down… I look horrid.

  A lump pushes up my throat when I think of how everyone at school will tease me. Sadness spills into my chest until it forces tears to spiral down my cheeks.

  I loved my hair. It was my protection against the world, and now… it’s gone.

  There’s a knock at the door, then Colton calls, “Are you okay, Brie?”

  I shake my head, and when I open my mouth to tell him I’ll be out in a minute, a sob escapes instead.

  “I’m coming in,” I hear Colton say, and when the door starts to open, I quickly turn my back to it.

  Now that I know what I look like, shame burns through me, and I don’t want Colton seeing me like this.

  I feel his hand on my lower back, and when he moves in next to me, I turn my face away from him. I wrap my arms around myself and hunch my shoulders, wishing I could just disappear.

  “Hey,” Colton whispers, and as if he knows exactly what I’m thinking, he says, “Your hair will grow back. Once my mom cuts it, it won’t look so bad anymore.”

  The thought of having a pair of scissors near me fills me with apprehension, but I know I’ll have to let Mrs. Lawson cut my hair, or I won’t be able to go back to school.

  Not wanting to be alone with her, I ask, “Can she do it now? I don’t want to miss any classes and…” My words trail away because I don’t want to offend Colton by saying I don’t want to be here alone with his mom.

  “Sure.” His hand disappears from my back, and then I feel his fingers wrap around my hand, and he squeezes it. “Finish up in here, then come to the kitchen.”

  When his hand lets go of mine, I instantly miss the strength I felt.

  Once the door shuts behind Colton, I quickly relieve myself, then wash my hands. I borrow some of the toothpaste, and using the tip of my finger, I brush my teeth.

  When I’m done, I suck in a fortifying breath before I leave the bathroom.

  I first peek around the corner, and seeing Colton and Mrs. Lawson standing by the stove, I slowly walk closer. I keep the kitchen table between us.

  Not wanting to get in trouble for just standing around, I ask, “Can I help with anything?”

  Mrs. Lawson turns to me and smiles. “No, dear. Why don’t you get some coffee? Breakfast is almost ready.”

  Colton grabs two mugs out of a cupboard and pours coffee into them. “How do you drink yours?”

  “Some sugar and cream, please.” I move closer to him and nervously smile as I take a mug once he’s done stirring the caramel liquid. “Thank you.”

  “We’ll eat, and then my mom will help you with your hair,” Colton says before taking a sip.

  “Okay.” I nurse the warm liquid while I watch Mrs. Lawson make eggs. She looks like a mom should – tender smiles and warmth radiating off her.

  Once I’m done with my coffee, I clear my throat and say, “Thank you for letting me stay the night.”

  Mrs. Lawson glances at me, no aggression anywhere on her features. Her dark brown hair reaches just above her shoulders, and it doesn’t look like she’s brushed it.

  Mom will never leave her bedroom without every hair in place and her make-up done.

  Mrs. Lawson’s wearing a robe over her pajamas.

  Another thing Mom will never leave her room wearing.

  Colton takes three plates from a cupboard and begins to set the table. Wanting to do something, I grab his mug from where he left it on the counter and walk to the sink.

  Glancing over my shoulder at Mrs. Lawson, I ask, “Is it okay if I wash the dishes?”

  “You don’t have to, dear.” She looks up from where her eyes were trained on the eggs. “I’ll do them after the two of you head to school. It will give me something to do.”

  Oh wow, my mom will never wash dishes.

  The differences between my mom and Mrs. Lawson are glaringly obvious, and it makes me feel less anxious around her.

  When the food is ready, we sit down at the table, and just like the night before during dinner, there’s no tension as we eat.

  A feeling ripples through me, and it sends my heart racing. It almost feels ravenous.

  I want more of this.

  I want to be a part of a family that loves each other.

  COLTON

  Brie is much more relaxed than last night, and it eases the worry that’s been gnawing at my insides.

  Once we’re all done eating, Mom says, “Colton, will you place one of the chairs in the bathroom?”

  “Sure.” While I’m busy setting up everything for the haircut, Brie clears the table.

  When we’re done, I walk over to Brie, and I take hold of her elbow. Worried about the cuts on her head, I lean down and whisper, “How do the gashes feel?”

  She lifts a hand to her head and pats over it. “Better.”

  “Let’s make your hair beautiful again. Don’t want you to be late for school,” Mom says.

  Brie hesitates before she answers, “Okay.”

  “Want me to come with?” I ask.

  Brie nods and knowing she wants me there makes the same weird sensation from the night before ripple through my chest. I attribute it to just feeling protective of her.

  I go sit on the closed toilet lid, so I’m out of the way.

  “Can you wet your hair?” Mom asks while she reaches for a towel.

  Brie wets it in the sink, and then Mom presses most of the water out before draping the towel around Brie’s shoulders.

  “Take a seat.” Mom reaches for the scissors on the counter, and I watch as Brie’s eyes widen when she notices.

  I lean forward and place my hand over Brie’s. “I’m here.”

  She turns her hand over, and grips tightly hold of mine.

  Her eyes lock on my face, and when I see the fear in them, I say, “Wait a second, Mom.” I reach forward and pull the chair with Brie closer until her knees are between mine.

  “Just keep looking at me,” I say to her.

  Brie nods, and the moment I reach for her hand, her fingers wrap tightly around my palm.

  I nod for Mom to proceed.

  My eyes stay locked with Brie’s as Mom begins to cut the remaining long strands. With every snip, Brie flinches. Tension hangs thick in the air, and I force a smile to my face, hoping it will make Brie feel better.

  By the time Mom sets the scissors down, my stomach feels like a hard knot of nerves.

  Letting out a tense breath, I ask, “Are you done?”

  “Yes.” Mom moves the towel from around Brie’s shoulders and drops it in the basin. “Now, for the fun part. Let’s go to my room so I can blowdry it.”

  When we get up, my eyes go over the new hairstyle, and seeing how good it looks, pride swells in my chest for the incredible job my mom did. “It looks good.”

  “Really?” Brie asks.

  She turns to look at the mirror, but I stop her. “Let’s finish first. I want you to see it once my mom’s dried it.”

  Walking into Mom’s room, I go sit on the unmade bed and watch as Mom styles Brie’s hair. When Mom’s done, she pulls at a couple of strands wit
h her fingers, saying, “You can look.”

  Brie’s eyes lift to the mirror in front of her, and then her lips part. A smile begins to waver around her lips before it stretches into a full-blown happy grin. “Gosh, thank you so much.”

  Mom cut it short like mine at the back, and at the front, the bangs are longer.

  I stare at Brie’s face, and then the realization hits – she’s actually pretty with the long hair not hanging in her face. You can now see her eyes clearly.

  Damn, she’s really pretty.

  There’s a tightening feeling in my chest, and I swallow hard.

  Holy shit, Brie’s beautiful.

  My eyes meet hers in the mirror’s reflection, and then she asks, “Do you like it?”

  “A lot,” I admit before I’m able to deal with the new emotions. “You look good.”

  Her cheeks flush, and she quickly gets up. Turning to my mom, there’s a grateful smile on Brie’s face. “Thank you.”

  “Maybe we can play around with some make-up next time,” Mom offers.

  “O-okay.”

  Brie’s obviously still cautious with my mother, but at least she doesn’t look downright terrified anymore. It makes me smile, but then it fades when I remember we still have to go by her house for her uniform.

  “I’m just going to get dressed. I’ll be back in a couple of minutes.”

  I dart out of the room and rush through my morning routine. It’s the quickest I’ve ever taken to get ready for school.

  “I’ll wash the clothes before I return them,” I hear Brie say as I come down the stairs.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Mom replies.

  I find them standing by the front door and stop to press a kiss to Mom’s cheek. “I’ll see you later.”

  “Have a good day,” she calls after us.

  Chapter 11

  BRIE

  During the short ride to my house, all the good feelings I experienced at Colton’s home fade, and in their place, familiar apprehension sets in.

  I stop by the front door and suck in a deep breath. Before I reach for the knob, Colton’s fingers wrap around mine.

  “If anything happens, let me handle it,” he says.

  I turn my head and glance up at him. I remember the first time I saw him. I thought he would only be trouble.

  Boy, was I wrong.

  Colton walked right into my hell and started fighting for me, even though I never expected him to.

  The front door suddenly swings open, and my mother glares at me. “Where the hell have you been?” Her eyes slant to Colton, and the sneer on her face deepens. “Seriously? You ran to him? I told you not to see him!”

  My face warms with embarrassment because my mother’s so rude to Colton.

  She lifts a hand to reach for my arm, but Colton steps between us, and his voice is a deep rumble of warning as he says, “We’re just here for her school uniform.” Colton pushes my mother to the side, and he pulls me inside.

  “What the hell?” Mom snaps.

  Colton lets go of my hand and points to the stairs. “Go get dressed, Brie.” Then he turns to face my mother and growls, “Back off. Your days of abusing Brie are over.”

  My mouth drops open with surprise when she doesn’t lay into him, and I hurry to my room.

  Wow, my mother’s actually cautious with Colton here.

  I’ve never seen her like that, and it makes her look less like a threat.

  I change into my school clothes as quickly as I can, and grabbing my phone and bag, I rush back to where Colton is still glaring at my mother.

  Not knowing what else to say, I stammer, “B-bye.” And then I dart out of the door with Colton right behind me.

  “I’ll see you later,” Mom says derisively, and her words promise nothing good for me.

  Walking back to Colton’s truck, I keep glancing up at his face that looks like a dark thunder cloud. I’ve seen so many sides to Colton in the past twenty-four hours, and knowing he’s only been kind to me, I don’t feel scared like I would’ve in the past.

  “Thank you,” I murmur. “For everything.”

  The dark expression fades from his face, and then he smiles at me. “You’re welcome.”

  Once he’s steering the truck down the street, I say, “It was really nice spending the night at your house.”

  “The offer still stands,” he murmurs, his attention on the road ahead. “You can move in this afternoon. I’ll go with you to get the rest of your clothes.”

  Last night I was hesitant, but after this morning, I think it would be nice.

  But.

  Won’t it be weird? I haven’t known them that long.

  What will people think?

  “Don’t worry about it now,” Colton says as if he can sense my worry.

  When he stops the truck in the school’s parking area, my eyes go to the entrance of the main building, and I pat nervously over my hair.

  “Does it hurt?” Colton asks.

  “No, but… ah…” I feel self-conscious for asking but push through, “can you see any of the scabs?”

  Colton shakes his head, and lifting a hand, he nudges a strand to the side from where it fell over my right eye. “Not at all. You still look pretty, so don’t let anything those assholes say get to you.”

  I let out a slow breath, then push the door open and climb out. I wait for Colton before we walk to the entrance, and this time I stick close to his side.

  I feel eyes on me but keep my head down as I walk to my locker. I’m just about to open it when I see a poster stuck to it.

  It takes a moment to realize what I’m looking at, and then the blood chills in my veins.

  “Damn, don’t you think a dollar is a bit steep for groping?” Michael taunts from behind me.

  There’s a photo of me taking a shower in the school locker room, with a list of prices for nasty things. My eyes dart over the words, each one digging a chunk out of my heart and soul.

  $1 – Groping. $1 – Full Frontal. $1 – Strip Show.

  $2 – Handjob. $2 – Blowjob. $1 – Missionary.

  $3 – Doggy. $3 – Cowgirl. $3 – Valedictorian.

  This isn’t happening.

  NoNoNoNoNo.

  Everyone has written all over it, and someone even wrote ‘not my cum’ with an arrow pointing to the suds on my shoulder.

  Kill yourself. Hoover lips. Fuggly cunt.

  Puked here. Freak. In your dreams. Funny as fuck.

  Waste of space. Dick 4 Freak. I’ll drown her for free.

  It feels like something snaps inside me as humiliation burns through me like hot coals.

  Only then does everyone’s laughter get through to me.

  They all saw it.

  My emotions spin out of control, and they begin to suffocate me until all I can hear are my breaths.

  “Fuck,” Colton snaps, and my eyes dart to his face. He’s staring at the poster.

  He’s seeing all the ugly words and the photo of me – naked from behind.

  He sees me just like everyone else does.

  An unbearable mortification makes me move away from him.

  The last of my will to live fades away, leaving me with one thought only – I need to end this hell.

  I turn and break out into a run, needing to get away from the shame and hopeless despair that chases me like a million hell hounds.

  My breaths burn over my lips, and my heart pounds against my ribs as I sprint down the stairs. My bag falls to the ground, and I leave it as I race across the parking area.

  After last night, I don’t have any strength left to process what just happened.

  I’m done.

  I can’t handle it anymore.

  I’m going to put an end to this because whatever waits in the afterlife has to be better than this nightmare.

  COLTON

  Enraged, I yank the paper off Brie’s locker, and crumpling it, I shove it into my pocket. I turn to where Michael is laughing his ass off. Not caring about the conseque
nces, my fist connects with his jaw.

  He slams into the opposite row of lockers, and the other students move out of the way.

  “I’m going to kill you,” I growl as I swing another blow at him. I can’t hear anything past the bastard’s grunts as my fist keeps connecting with his face.

  I’m going to fucking kill him.

  Hands grab at my arm, but I manage to pull free, delivering another punch to Michael’s jaw before they grab hold of me again.

  “Let go,” I shout, needing to end the piece of shit in front of me.

  “That’s enough,” Mr. Matthews snaps, and it’s only then I realize that teachers are here. “To the office! Now!” Mr. Matthews barks.

  Knowing I can’t risk getting myself expelled, I back off and stalk to the damn office with a bleeding Michael right behind me.

  My heart is pounding so damn hard I won’t be surprised if it ripped through my chest.

  We’re ushered into Mr. Davis, the principal’s office, and joined by Dr. Montgomery, the school’s counselor.

  “Someone want to tell me what this is about?” Mr. Davis asks from where he’s sitting on the other side of the desk.

  I dig the poster out of my pocket and straighten it out before I slam it down in front of him. “He did this to Brie Weinstock.”

  “You don’t have any proof,” Michael mutters arrogantly.

  “He bullies her every day,” I snap, unable to calm down. “What are you going to do about it?”

  Mr. Davis’ eyes go to Michael. “Wait outside. I’ll deal with you later.”

  Michael lets out a huff and pulls his phone out of his pocket as he walks to the door. He’s clearly not worried at all.

  Probably because they’re not going to do anything.

  “You can’t beat up another student, no matter what the reason,” Mr. Davis says to me.

  I glare at the man, my insides boiling. “Just give me my punishment so I can go make sure my friend is okay.”

  “You need to meet with Dr. Montgomery to talk about that temper of yours.”

  “Okay.”

  “Next time you pull a stunt like this, I’m suspending you.”

  “Fine.”

  “Get to class.”