by Mari Carr
“So what are you trying to say?”
“I guess this… It’s no use having big brothers if you don’t learn from their fuckups.”
Sawyer didn’t reply, wasn’t sure how to answer. A few days ago, he’d been a man in charge of his destiny, his life. Now, the only word he could think to describe himself was shattered. How could he ask Leah for more when he didn’t have a damn thing to offer in exchange? She’d come to that party looking for a man to take some of her burdens away, not to pile his own on her shoulders as well. No. She wanted to explore BDSM and that was all he could give her. He could take charge of her body, but that was all he had the strength to control. “I don’t need anything except a warm, willing woman in my bed right now.”
It was a lie, but Sam didn’t argue with him.
Sawyer decided it was time for a diversion. “So, you ready for this wedding?”
Mercifully, his brother let the subject of Leah drop.
“Yeah. I can’t wait to make Cindi mine. Permanently.” Sam crossed the barn until he stood right in front of him. “That reminds me. I was sort of hoping you’d stand up with me. As my best man.”
Sawyer offered his hand for a shake. “I’m glad you’ll still have me. I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be, bro. Thanks.”
Sam nudged Sawyer’s hand away, opting instead for a hug. Sawyer didn’t realize until that moment how much he’d missed his brother.
“It’s good to have you back, Saw.”
Sawyer grinned. “Yeah. It’s been a hell of a few days. Not sure it felt like home until right now.”
Sam helped Sawyer finish unloading the chairs before sneaking off with Cindi shortly after lunch. Sawyer spent the rest of the afternoon moving from one mindless chore to the next.
With each passing minute, his body grew harder, hungrier as he anticipated Leah’s arrival. When his watch told him school was out for the day, he camped out on the front porch. Sawyer glanced down the driveway when he heard tires on the gravel. He smiled. Finally.
He was waiting by her car when she opened her door and got out.
“Hiya, stranger.” Her smile was genuine and friendly and the best thing he’d seen in days.
“Yeah, about that. What do you say we get reacquainted?”
“Now?”
He glanced at his motorcycle parked outside the barn and a plan took root. “I was thinking we could take a ride.”
Leah looked tempted, but she hesitated. “I was supposed to talk to Jody and Cindi about the music for the wedding.”
“Sam said you were staying for dinner. You can discuss it then. Just a quick ride, rose.”
There were definitely two meanings to his suggestion, and the quick part wasn’t going to be far from the truth. He was too hot, too ready for her. He’d never managed to hold off for long once he got into her sweet body. He waited for her response, holding his breath. What would he do if she said no? He recalled Seth’s kidnapping tactic with Jody and realized the idea had merit.
If he were a gentleman, he’d step aside and let her head into his family’s house untouched.
Pity was that wasn’t going to happen. His inner alpha roared. For once, he took his brother’s advice.
“I’m going to get a blanket and some rope from the barn. You stayed away too long, rose. It’s time I remind you who owns this body.”
She didn’t reply, though her body gave him the only answer he needed. Her breathing turned shallow, and her nipples pebbled.
“Don’t move.”
Leah stood spellbound while Sawyer tied a large blanket to the rear of his motorcycle. Once it was secure, he straddled the bike and beckoned to her. “Hop on.”
She took her place behind him, unable to resist a small scream when Sawyer turned the motor over and took off. The ride gave her too much time to think. Neither of them bothered to attempt a conversation that required yelling to be heard above the roar of the engine.
Sawyer had been waiting in the yard when she’d pulled up. Her heart soared when she’d seen him on the porch. The expression he wore today was a far cry from the last time they’d been together. She hoped his smile meant he’d patched up his differences with his brothers and was settling into being home again.
She clung tighter to him and enjoyed the feeling of his hard, sexy body as he drove the sleek motorcycle. He was wearing faded Levi’s and a T-shirt. He’d exchanged his cowboy hat for a helmet. He took her breath away. Her urban cowboy.
For the past three days, she’d been climbing the walls—reliving, analyzing, fretting over every word they’d ever said to each other.
When they reached their destination, Leah pulled off her helmet and looked around. Sawyer had picked the perfect spot. They were flanked by a mountain on one side and miles and miles of pasture land on the other three. It felt like they were the only two people on the planet.
Sawyer unhooked the blanket and tossed it to her. “Pick us a good spot.”
She roamed a few feet away, flipping out the soft material and spreading it on the grass.
Leah slipped off her shoes before sitting down.
Sawyer joined her. “Three days is too long.”
She laughed when he uttered exactly what she’d been thinking. “I thought you’d be catching up with your family.” She sobered as she remembered the scene in the dining room. “Everything okay?”
He nodded. “Yep. Patched things up with Sam this afternoon. Still need to track down Seth and Silas and set everything right there, but it’s better.”
“I’m glad.”
“Sam asked me to be his best man.”
She imagined Sawyer in a tuxedo and was grateful she’d agreed to sing at the wedding. There was no way she’d miss that sight. “Awesome.”
She squeezed her legs together. Five minutes in his presence had her panties wet and her nipples hard. She needed to get a grip, but she couldn’t help wishing he’d hurry things along.
Leah glanced at his motorcycle. “I can’t believe you still own that silly bike.”
Sawyer reacted as if she’d struck him. “Jenn is a Ducati, rose. There’s absolutely nothing silly about a Ducati.”
She placed her hand over her heart and feigned a swoon. “Oh my, how could I forget? It’s a Ducati.” She stressed the name, giggling. “That’s the one you got for your birthday, right?”
He nodded. “Eighteenth. Worked my ass off around the ranch to earn money for half. JD said he’d pitch in the other half as the birthday gift.”
“You came into town on it. I remember my mother joking around that you Compass brothers were reckless enough on horses and JD must be out of his mind to put you on that thing.”
Sawyer laughed. “Is that why you couldn’t go for a ride with me?”
Leah sighed. Sawyer had invited her out on his motorcycle that day and she’d never wanted to go anywhere so badly in her life. “No, that was actually my boss’ fault. We were short-staffed at the diner.”
Sawyer ran his finger along her arm. “Well, at least we got to make up for it today.”
“Yeah.” She hesitated for a moment, and then she said what was on her mind. “I always wondered what would have happened if I’d said to hell with it and gone with you.”
“What do you think?”
The hungry look on his face proved he suspected the same thing she did. It wasn’t long after that missed ride that she’d given into Les’ invitation to relieve her of her pesky virginity. Would history have been rewritten if only she’d said yes?
“I think we both know.” Leah shrugged and dismissed the thought. No use crying over spilt milk. “I can see the appeal of a motorcycle. That ride was a lot of fun.”
“Riding is very fun.”
She bit her lower lip. His eyes drifted from her face to her neck. She wondered if he could see her pulse, could tell how hard her heart was hammering.
It was difficult for her to think whenever he was near. Unfortunately, when she was alone, her brain kicked into
overdrive and it had been giving her a run for her money the past three days.
He said he needed her. Actually, he needed the distraction she could provide. She was glad to be able to help him through this hard time. For once, her head was telling her to go ahead and submit to the sexy cowboy. She finally had a sex life—and it was a good one. Sawyer allowed her to explore the boundaries of her desires and he was opening her eyes to a whole new world of sensual bliss.
This time the problem was her heart. It was digging in its heels, demanding everything—Sawyer’s body, his laughter, his compassion, his love.
He’d offered some, but not all. How long could she accept half without begging him for the rest?
Sawyer moved closer. He looked like a predator stalking its prey. “I’m not stopping, Leah.”
“You’re not?”
He shook his head.
“What if I say my safe word?”
His eyes narrowed. “Don’t.”
She struggled to take a breath. He constantly offered her the choice. This time, he wasn’t.
She leaned forward, initiating the kiss before Sawyer could get to her. She gripped his hair tightly in her hands, attacking him with her lips, her teeth, her tongue. She was starving.
“Easy, rose. We can skip dinner and take all night if you need it.”
He pushed her down on the blanket, taking the lead on the kiss and just like that, calm descended. The stress of work, her anxieties and insecurities all melted away and she put herself in Sawyer’s oh-too-capable hands.
He came over her body, supporting the majority of his weight on his elbows, while managing to cover every part of her. His legs shoved her knees apart as he claimed his spot in between them. Pressing down, he rubbed his denim-covered cock against her, letting her sense exactly what he was offering.
“God, Sawyer,” she whispered.
His lips drifted along her cheek, nipping and licking the bare flesh at her neck. “I feel the same way. I need you so bad, Leah.”
She dragged his T-shirt off. The second it hit the ground, she was back, touching him, memorizing every curve of his tattoos, every well-defined muscle.
Sawyer gripped her waist and spun until he was beneath her on the blanket. He used the position to give him the ability to undress her. He reached for the buttons on her blouse, but she beat him to the punch, pulling the silky shirt off. His hands engulfed her lace-covered breasts.
“Take off your bra.”
She complied, pulling it slowly from her body, savoring his almost-feral gaze as she revealed her breasts little by little.
“Fuck,” he muttered when she peeled the last bit away. “Come here. Feed them to me.”
She straddled his hips, pressing down to find some relief for her aching pussy as she bent at the waist to give Sawyer the taste he’d requested.
He roughly grasped her breasts, moving from one to the other as he planted soft kisses and hard sucks on her tight nipples. She began to gyrate, thrusting against him, frustrated by the layers of clothing between them.
Sawyer continued to suck on her breasts, but one hand drifted down her side to lift her skirt. He raised it to her waist, and then gripped her ass, pulling her more firmly against him.
He chuckled softly. “I haven’t indulged in dry-humping since I was a teenager. Forgot how good it feels.”
She agreed as Sawyer tumbled them until she was beneath him. She was surprised when he made no move to take off his jeans or her panties. Instead he continued to rub their bodies together.
“Wonder who’ll last longer.”
She groaned. “Oh my God. Seriously? Sawyer, I’m about to explode. I need you to fuck me. I can’t stand any more of this.”
He leaned forward and bit her earlobe. “You’re going to take exactly what I give you. Should we put a wager on it? We keep our pants on. First one to make the other come gets…”
He paused, letting her fill in the blanks. She finished the sentence without considering her answer. “Gets to be on top.”
Sawyer grinned. “You a cowgirl at heart, rose? Giddyup?”
She hadn’t really considered it one way or the other until she’d been above him. She’d spent far too much time on top in the past, the position never really bringing her much satisfaction. Something told her it would be different with Sawyer.
“Hell yeah.”
He pinched her nipple, the touch making her groan. He was going to fight dirty.
“No other rules?” she asked.
He shook his head. “Do your worst, Leah. I’m ready for you.”
Her laugh was short-lived when he pressed his cock against her pussy. He had the definite advantage. His denim was far thicker than her thin, silk panties and he knew it. He rubbed harder, his cock stroking nearly the entire length of her slit, paying special attention to her clit.
“This isn’t fair,” she said when his lips returned to her breasts.
He looked up at her and grinned. “Every night I close my eyes to go to sleep, I see your beautiful face, the way it looks when you come.” He moved against her again, the rough denim creating enough friction to drive her out of her mind.
“I stroke my cock and remember you, your soft cries, your sweet scent. You drive me wild, Leah.”
She threw her head back against the blanket. Her eyes drifted shut as she imagined him jacking off in his bed. It was a hot image.
“God, Saw.”
“Come for me, Leah. Let me see it again. For real this time.”
She wasn’t sure what magic he’d worked on her, but his cock rubbing her slit and his command were the only triggers she needed. She conceded the prize and came—loudly. “Ohmigod. Ohmigod.” She trembled, amazed by how quickly he’d brought her to this point. She gasped and struggled to catch her breath.
Sawyer’s chuckle brought her back to reality.
“Hate to break it to you, cowboy, but I think that time, losing was way better than winning.”
“Good point.”
“Of course, we could always go for a draw.” Placing her palm between Sawyer’s cock and her body, she firmly applied as much pressure as she could muster to make sure he got plenty of sensation through the denim.
Sawyer cursed. Bingo. He liked her hand job. She recalled their conversation about the motorcycle, and she decided to up the ante.
“Imagine if we’d taken this ride the day you got your bike, Saw. I would have liked to be your first. We would have ridden out here, sneaking onto the property so our parents wouldn’t know.”
Sawyer pushed his cock harder against her palm. He was enjoying her story.
“Of course, I would have been nervous since it was my first time too. You would know that and you’d take things slow. Kissing me for hours.”
Sawyer bent down, offering her a kiss so sweet and innocent she almost believed her own words.
When he pulled away, she followed him, searching for more. Sawyer shook his head. “Tell me about that day.”
She leaned back, tightening her grip on his cock. “You’d touch my breasts…above my shirt at first. But soon, you’d get bolder and slip your fingers beneath my T-shirt.”
He mimicked her words, caressing her breasts almost shyly, a far cry from the no-holds-barred lover she was used to. “Do you like me touching you here?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Would you let me see them? Kiss them?”
She nodded. Her heart raced when Sawyer picked up the game, reminding her so much of the boy he used to be. She was transported back in time, reveling in the opportunity to do things differently. To do them right.
“You’re so pretty.”
She closed her eyes, his compliment moving her.
He bent his head and softly kissed her breasts, worshipping them with delicate strokes. “Have you ever let another boy touch you here, Leah?”
She shook her head. “No one. Only you.”
He gave her a boyish smile, then kissed her. He shoved her hand more firmly
against his cock. “I love your hand on me.”
She let him guide her clumsy, innocent motions. “It’s so big,” she whispered.
He laughed. “Not really. You want to see it?”
“I’m afraid.”
He took her face in his hands. “You don’t have to be, Leah. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to.”
She licked her lips and nodded. “I’d like to.”
He rose until he was kneeling above her. Unzipping his jeans, he slowly pulled out his cock.
She bit her lower lip as she stared at him, the nervousness too genuine. What would she give to go back in time and have this day be real? “You should have been my first.”
Sawyer grasped her hand and lifted her until she was sitting in front of him. She’d never seen him look so serious. “I’m going to make love to you, Leah. I am going to be your first.”
Tears sprung to her eyes. He was right. She’d never made love before. In the past, she chosen badly, slept with men for the sex, not the affection. “I’m scared,” she whispered.
He gave her a crooked grin. “So am I.”
He pressed on her shoulder until she lay on the blanket. He bid her to lift her hips as he rid her of her skirt and panties. She’d been naked in front of him before, but she’d never felt this exposed.
He stood briefly to shed his own jeans and within seconds, he was on top of her. “We’ll go slowly.”
She accepted his soft kiss, sealing his promise.
She opened her legs and he placed the head of his cock the slightest bit inside. “I promise I won’t hurt you.”
She ran her thumb along his lower lip and prayed that was true. Right now, Sawyer held her heart in his hands and it would be far too easy for him to break it.
“I want to feel you inside me,” she pleaded.
Sawyer moved slowly, each penetrating inch touching more than her body. He was piercing her soul, claiming far more than he realized.
Buried to the hilt, he stopped and kissed her. “Amazing.”
She’d never considered herself anything special before, but in a few short days, Sawyer had her believing she truly was. They rocked gently, their bodies swaying in perfect harmony. Though they’d only been together a few times, they were already in tune with each other. Sawyer liked it when she stroked his back, and he knew it drove her wild when he kissed her neck. Over and over, he thrust into her body and she wondered if there’d ever been a more wonderful moment.
