No Place to Hide

by Susan Lewis

  “Who’ll come with his gun,” Abby shouted, “and shoot you out. They can do that, can’t they, Dad? Farmers can shoot people who mess with their livestock?”

  “Why don’t you go and get a life bypass somewhere?” Ben growled at her. “And take Chantal with you.”

  As Chantal’s eyes widened with hurt, Justine put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “He doesn’t want you to see him giving in,” she whispered, hoping she was right, and leaving Matt to deal with it, she gently ushered the girls back through the orchard.

  It was only a few minutes after she’d managed to dispatch Abby and Chantal down to the deli for any treat of their choice that Matt and Ben came into the kitchen. Seeing how tense they both looked, Justine quickly searched for something friendly to say.

  “Don’t just walk away,” Matt snapped angrily as Ben made for the stairs. “You need to tell us what the hell’s wrong, and something obviously is.”

  To Justine’s surprise and relief, Ben stopped at the foot of the stairs, but didn’t turn round.

  “What happened with Connor?” she asked gently. “Why did you fall out?”

  “Because he’s an asshole,” Ben grunted scathingly. His tone implied that she, a supposedly intelligent human being, should have understood that.

  “What did he do?” Matt wanted to know.

  Ben shook his head; his long, matted hair was masking his face, but Justine could see how tightly he was gripping the stair rail. A moment later, to her astonishment, she realized he was crying, great hiccuping sobs, and by the time she reached him he’d dropped to his knees. “It’s all right,” she murmured, trying to help him up, or at least find a place for her arms that he would be able to accept. “Everything’s going to be fine,” she insisted, looking helplessly at Matt. This was the last thing either of them had expected.

  “What is it, son?” Matt urged, as Ben turned his back on them. “Why are you so upset?”

  “What did Connor do?” Justine pressed, finding herself wondering if the crying was as real as it seemed, and hating herself for doubting it.

  “It’s not him,” Ben choked, “it’s you two.” And suddenly rushing up the stairs, he charged along the landing to his room.

  Matt was after him like a shot, getting there before Ben could lock the door. “What about us?” Matt demanded as Ben roared like an animal and flung himself down on the bed. He glared at Justine, who’d come in behind him.

  She was looking around. The room was a black hole of teenage-boy flotsam, with rugby and football boots, crossbows, cricket bats, old food and drink cartons, hockey sticks, videogames, and magazines cluttering the floor. The duvet was bunched into a heap against the headboard, towels blocked the way into the bathroom, clothes were spilling out of the wardrobe, and his computer and TV were haphazardly filling up the space between tangles of wires, consoles, keyboards and remote controls. The only order in the room was inside the cabinet containing his many sporting trophies, although Justine noticed that one of the glass panels was cracked. All four of the curtains at his double windows were hanging off the poles.

  Going to sit on the bed, Matt put a hand on his shoulder.

  Ben quickly shrugged it away.

  “What have we done?” Matt said gently. “Please tell us why you’re so angry with us.”

  “Just go away. Fuck off,” Ben snarled into the pillow.

  “Sweetheart,” Justine said, kneeling beside him, and still not sure how trusting she was of this outburst, “we can’t make anything better, or even apologize, if you won’t tell us what the problem is.”

  As he continued to growl and rage into his pillow Matt and Justine looked at each other, not sure what to do.

  “You don’t care about me,” Ben seethed furiously. “I don’t mean anything to you. All you care about is Abby.”

  “That isn’t true,” Justine cried. “We care just as much.”

  “Liar! You wish I was dead.”

  “That’s just nonsense,” Justine protested.

  “Why are you telling yourself these things?” Matt interrupted. “You’ve got to know that—”

  “You’re always doing stuff with her. You never do anything with me.”

  “Because you don’t want to do anything,” Matt reminded him. “But if you’ve changed your mind and you want to start going to games again…”

  “You mean with Uncle Simon, because you never come anywhere with me.”

  “Ben, how can you say that?” Justine exclaimed. “We’ve taken you to World Cup matches, European championships, the Olympics, for God’s sake…You’ve been to Twickenham, Wembley, Yankee Stadium with Dad…”

  “You don’t come, though, do you?” he shouted. “You’re always too busy doing stuff with Abby.”

  “Stop this right now,” Matt barked. “Do you have any idea how lucky you are to have been to all the places you have? The experiences you’ve had, the things you’ve seen…”

  “You even came back from Australia so you could be at the gig for Abby.”

  “We’d have done the same for you if something special had happened,” Matt assured him.

  “But you didn’t, did you? I was supposed to be going to camp in the summer, but you couldn’t be bothered to come with me. All the other dads went, but I didn’t have anyone to come with me, so I had to stay at home.”

  Matt frowned in confusion. “When was this? You never told me…”

  “Because you don’t listen. Nothing I say is of interest to you. I’m just a waste of space. You’re ashamed of me—”

  “Stop talking nonsense,” Matt broke in forcefully. He was looking at Justine, clearly wondering if she knew anything about this summer camp.

  Briefly shaking her head, she watched Ben sit up, plant his elbows on his knees, and hang his head down between them.

  Carefully, Matt said, “Did Wesley and Uncle Simon go on the camping trip?”

  Ben muttered, “It was just our year.”

  “And you’re sure you told me about it?”

  “I brought a note home from school.”

  Afraid that he might have and they’d somehow missed it, Justine asked, “Why didn’t you say something? We could have postponed the trip, or got Uncle Simon to go with you.”

  “I didn’t want Uncle Simon to come. I wanted Dad.”

  Looking as wretched as he was clearly meant to feel, Matt said, “I’m sorry I let you down, son. I promise it won’t happen again.”

  “Yeah, it will, because it always does. Now why don’t you fuck off out of my room, both of you, I don’t want you in here anymore.”

  It wasn’t until they were downstairs and safely out of earshot that Matt said quietly, “Well, at least he’s talking.”

  Choking on a laugh, Justine put a finger to her lips and walked into his arms. Today, she decided, was definitely not the right day to tell Ben about the baby.

  Present Day—Culver, Indiana

  Darkness had fallen more than an hour ago; Lula and Hazel still hadn’t been found.

  There were people everywhere, crowding the lane, combing the lake shore, spreading into the woods…The state police had arrived, boosting the numbers of local officers. Everyone seemed to be shouting into radios and cellphones; blue lights flashed through the trees, over the moonlit water, across the house.

  Justine was on the porch, desperate to act, not knowing what to do. Panic was trying to overwhelm her; fear was striking her heart with thick, violent stabs. The police had ordered her to wait here; they were handling things now. She was unable to make herself believe it was happening—it had to be a nightmare. No one had taken Lula and Hazel, they couldn’t have, yet where were they?

  She and Sallie Jo had already answered dozens of questions. Did they have any idea where the girls might have gone? Had they checked their phones for messages? Was there a friend they might have visited? Had anyone been to Sallie Jo’s to find out if they were there? Had they ever been out alone at night before? What were they wearing? Could Justine
check to see if anything was missing from Lula’s room, such as warm coats, boots—anything that might suggest they’d planned to go out?

  As the news spread about town the festival arrangements were abandoned, cafés and restaurants emptied, as did the VFW hall on East Washington. They were all here, swelling the numbers of searchers, waiting to be told what to do.

  Justine heard someone mention an Amber Alert, and the world seemed to spin off its axis.

  Too many nightmares were coming back to her; she couldn’t cope with this. She had to make it stop.

  “That doesn’t mean anyone thinks they’ve been abducted,” Sallie Jo assured her, clearly trying to bolster herself as well. “It’s standard procedure in these situations. Isn’t that right, Toby?”

  “Correct,” the town’s chief marshal confirmed, his face glowing blue, falling into darkness, and glowing blue again. “The alert isn’t only about abduction. If they’ve wandered off…”

  Justine wasn’t listening. She knew in her heart that they hadn’t wandered off, that someone had taken them. Surely the police had worked that out for themselves. The window in Lula’s room was open; crime scene investigators were already there, carrying out their work. For Tallulah’s sake she had to show Toby the email she’d received, even if it meant telling them who she really was, why she was here…

  There was a sudden commotion in the lane. Something had happened.

  Please, God, they’ve been found.

  It turned out that two small bicycles had been discovered on an overgrown track in the woods. There were tire marks from a truck nearby.

  David took hold of Sallie Jo as she started to break down.

  Justine’s eyes were wide and raw as she watched a police officer duck under the tape and come toward them. He spoke briefly with Toby and listened as Toby turned to Justine and Sallie Jo, saying as gently as he could, “We’re going to need up-to-date photos and a full description of what the girls were wearing.”

  With trembling hands Sallie Jo clicked open her phone. Seconds later a recent shot of Hazel was being sent on for processing.

  “Justine?” he prompted.

  Justine looked down at her phone, hardly knowing what to do.

  “Let me,” David said, and taking the phone he transmitted a shot of Lula sitting on the porch with Daisy. The one I’d wanted to send to Matt.

  “K9 unit’s about ten minutes away,” someone announced over Toby’s radio. “Helicopters are up.”

  Justine thought she was going mad.

  “…you to identify the bicycles,” she heard Toby saying.

  She tried to grasp the lifeline—the bicycles might not belong to Hazel and Lula—but it slipped away and she was drowning again.

  She and Sallie Jo followed Toby through the crowd. Other officers escorted them, instructing everyone to be patient or to stand back.

  Minutes later they were in a glaring pool of light deep in the woods staring past ribbons of police tape to where Hazel’s and Lula’s bikes were lying abandoned on the brambly trail.

  Justine sank to her knees.

  Toby came down with her. “It’s OK,” he murmured. “You’re going to be fine. We’ll find them.”

  “Yes, it’s their bicycles,” she heard Sallie Jo whispering raggedly to another officer.

  Justine’s head was spinning. How was she going to break this to Matt? How would she even begin to explain that Lula had gone?

  There was the sound of someone shouting farther down the trail. A flurry of torchlight lit up the woods fifty yards ahead as Toby and others started running in the direction of the disturbance.

  Without thinking Justine went after them. “Lula,” she sobbed wretchedly, “Lula, I’m here.”

  With no warning a gunshot boomed through the night.

  Justine reeled as if she’d been hit. Her ears were ringing; there was no breath to take.

  Suddenly she started to run, panicked, desperate to find her baby, but she was grabbed by an officer and pressed against a tree.

  Someone was shouting. “Billy, put down the gun.”

  “You’re on my land,” Billy Jakes shouted back.

  “Just put the gun down before someone gets hurt.”

  “Get off my land.”

  “No one’s going anywhere till you put down the gun.”

  “Come any closer and you’ll be sorry.”

  “Billy, two girls have gone missing. Do you know anything about that?”

  “I said get off my land.”

  “We need to search the area, Billy. If you don’t let us, we’ll have to arrest you.”

  A sudden silence fell. All that could be heard was the rustle of night creatures, birds, people moving stealthily, officers with firearms aloft sliding between trees.

  Justine was still being held back. Sweat, tears, mucus poured down her face. She was shaking so hard she could hardly see or hear.

  An officer up ahead shouted, “OK, step away from the gun, Billy. That’s right. Keep moving. I’m coming in now.”

  “You’re on my land,” Billy growled.

  “We need to find the girls. Can you tell us where they are?”

  “I don’t know nothing about no girls.”

  “Their bicycles are back there in the woods. Are you sure you haven’t seen them?”

  “ ’Course I’m sure. Do you think I’m blind? Ain’t no girls here.”

  “Have you seen anyone else hanging around? Anyone come calling you weren’t expecting?”

  “Ain’t seen no one all the day long, but I can tell you this, someone’s been around here and when I find ’em I’m going to shoot their butts right out.”

  “When you say someone’s been here…”

  “That’s what I said.”

  “How do you know if you didn’t see them?”

  “I always know.”

  The woods fell silent again and Justine became aware of Sallie Jo standing beside her. She could feel her penetrating stare.

  “You know something, don’t you?” Sallie Jo muttered.

  Justine flinched.

  “You’ve got to tell us,” Sallie Jo hissed. “Whatever it is…”

  “I don’t. I…”

  “Is it true you’re in witness protection? That’s what people are saying.”

  “No, no, I…”

  “Has someone found you? Is that what’s going on?”

  As Justine tried to answer, a message squawked over a nearby radio.

  “K9’s arrived.”

  “We’ll find them,” she mumbled to Sallie Jo.

  “We’d better,” Sallie Jo retorted, leaving Justine in no doubt that she’d hold her responsible if they didn’t.

  Moments later a burly officer with a close-cropped beard and wide, jutting face took a spaniel past the police tape to the bicycles, where it began sniffing around. Within seconds it was heading down the trail toward Billy Jakes’s trailer.

  “If Billy has them,” Sallie Jo whispered, “he won’t hurt them. He’s never hurt anyone.”

  Billy’s voice boomed through the night. “See, that’s how I know someone’s been here,” he yelled furiously.

  What did he mean?

  Suddenly David was with them. “The Amber Alert’s gone out,” he said quietly. “I’ve already had calls from Chicago and Indianapolis.”

  Realizing the calls would be from news organizations, Justine’s heart wrenched with hope and dismay. If it helped find Tallulah, she’d welcome every camera, reporter, and satellite truck in the nation. If it didn’t…

  Another voice on the radio. “Are Sallie Jo and Justine with you?”

  “Affirmative,” the officer answered.

  “OK. Someone’s coming to get them.”

  Why? What’s happened?

  Justine was already running forward, as was Sallie Jo.

  The sheriff and two men came through the trees to meet them, and escorted them past Billy’s dilapidated trailer and a tangle of uniformed officers toward a decaying old barn.<
br />
  The doors were open, and from the cavernous interior Toby and another officer emerged into the light. In their arms were two small girls, looking terrified and bewildered and in very bad need of their mothers.

  “Lula!” Justine sobbed, stumbling toward her.

  “Mummy!” Lula cried, reaching for her.

  Taking her, Justine held her so tight that neither of them could breathe. Thank you, thank you, thank you, she whispered feverishly. Oh, dear God, thank you.

  “Mummy, I was scared,” Lula whimpered, still clinging hard.

  “I know,” Justine murmured, “but it’s all right now. You’re safe and I’m going to take you home.”

  “I want paying for them rabbits,” Billy Jakes growled from the darkness.

  Toby whispered to Sallie Jo, “They set them all free. Every last one of the cages is empty.”

  Justine’s heart buckled. They’d come here to rescue the rabbits. No one had taken the girls after all.

  As she turned away she could feel Sallie Jo watching her, and knew that in spite of the happy outcome this wasn’t over yet.

  —

  While Lula slept that night, safe in Justine’s bed with Daisy snuggled in beside her, Justine lay staring helplessly into the darkness, not knowing what she should do or where she could go next.

  She’d truly believed when she’d come to Culver that her grandma was trying to reach her, to bring her to a safe place where she could put down roots and begin again, but that belief felt empty, even delusional now. The events of tonight, the simple mission to free a few dozen rabbits, had turned itself into a brutal reminder that she was never going to escape the horror she’d left behind, because it lived inside her, would always be wherever she went.

  The rabbit story was already making the news: two missing children, with the cutest twist of heroism at the end. The girls’ photographs had been flashed up on screens for everyone to see; the sheriff had commented for the cameras, as had Toby Henshaw; someone had even interviewed Billy Jakes, who’d demanded compensation for his livestock loss and the damage done to his land.