Out of the Shadow

by J. L. Paul

  Unless…

  She stopped on a number and dialed, hoping he was at least home and not busy. Or sleeping. She wasn’t sure what time it was and she didn’t know what he usually did on Friday nights - maybe he had a date or something.

  “I was wondering if you’d ever call back tonight,” Robby said sleepily. “How are you doing?”

  “Robby,” she said, tears running faster down her cheeks. “I need a huge favor.”

  “Ally, are you all right?” he asked. “You sound like you’re crying.”

  “I’m at this frat house. I came here with Jamie but I told him he could leave and I’d call my roommate. But after he left, I realized that I didn’t have my roommate’s number and I didn’t want to call Jamie because he was with a girl. So, I decided I’d just walk but I got sick and threw up in the flowers,” she paused to take a breath as fresh tears spilled out of her eyes. “And I just want to go home.”

  “Shh, Ally,” he comforted. “Tell me the address and I’ll come get you, okay?”

  “Thanks,” she said as she read the numbers off the mailbox. He made her promise to sit on the porch, watch for him, and not leave with anyone else. Then he decided it would be best if she just remained on the phone with him until he got there. She agreed but had to put the phone down twice so she could vomit in the flower beds.

  He pulled up in front of the house twenty minutes later and she ran to him, stumbling and falling into his arms. He held her as she sobbed into his chest. He edged back and pushed the hair off her face as her tears slowed.

  “It’s all going to be all right, Ally,” he said and kissed her forehead. “Get in the car and I’ll take you home.”

  “Thanks,” she said. He helped her with her seat belt and turned on the heat. She snuggled into the seat, her eyes drifting shut. “Thanks so much, Robby. I didn’t want to stay in that dorm room this weekend at all. I just want to get away and even though my parents aren’t home, I guess that lonely house is better than the campus with all the nosy girls.”

  “Your parents aren’t home?” he asked, throwing a frown her way.

  “No,” she said slowly, her stomach turning.

  “Ally, I’m not going to leave you home alone – not in this condition.”

  “I’ll be fine,” she said as her head drooped. “Promise.”

  He chuckled but didn’t take her home or to the dorms. Instead he took her to the tiny apartment he’d temporarily rented until he could find something more to his taste.

  He helped her up the stairs and held her as he unlocked the door. Once they got inside, he half carried her to the bathroom and just in time. She shoved him away before dropping by the toilet and emptying the last of the alcohol from her stomach.

  He handed her a glass of water once she flushed and helped her to her feet. She rinsed her mouth but didn’t dare look in the mirror. She had no desire to see how terribly awful she looked.

  He took her gently by the arm and guided her to the living room. “I’ll make you some hot tea. That should help.”

  She fell to the sofa and eased her body horizontally. Once she closed her eyes, the room stopped spinning and her stomach quit turning. Robby returned a moment later and squatted by her head.

  “I called Cole and we got into a horrible fight,” she said, struggling with tears again. “It was awful.”

  “You were both pretty angry,” he said in a reassuring tone. “You’ll talk tomorrow and work things out. You know I’m right.”

  “Yeah,” she said as she tossed an arm over her eyes. She groaned as her stomach gurgled, but settled a few seconds later.

  “Ally, why don’t you take my bed,” he suggested. “It’s probably more comfortable. I’ll camp out on the sofa tonight.”

  “Don’t want to move,” she muttered. “Don’t want to get sick again.”

  He chuckled and softly stroked her cheek. “You’re going to feel like hell in the morning, I guarantee it.”

  She moved her arm, cracked open an eye, and attempted a grin. “My first hangover – aren’t you the lucky one?”

  “I’m honored,” he quipped, smiling enough to set his dimples off.

  Her heart twirled and she wanted to make him keep smiling – it was just so charming. “Thanks for this, Robby. I mean it.”

  “Anytime, Ally,” he said, brushing her hair off her sticky face. He winked. “You can call me if you need anything.”

  All the pain that had been beating up her heart faded with his kindness. She stared at him, so many words on the tip of her tongue but reluctant to leave it. He must have seen it in her eyes for he bent over, aiming a kiss on her cheek. But she moved at the last second and caught his lips with hers.

  He froze for only a moment as her eyes fluttered shut and her hand lifted to the back of his neck. His fingers remained on her cheek and the slight contact was enough to scorch her skin. She deepened the kiss and he reciprocated, his hand coming to life and cupping her cheek. She sighed happily and raised her other hand so she could wind her fingers in his hair.

  She shifted and pulled him closer. His free hand moved to her hair and his fingers tangled in her tresses as his lips continued to move over hers. Warmth spread throughout her body and she forgot about her drunkenness and the party and the vomiting and thought only about him.

  Then he was whispering her name on her lips and she smiled, opening her eyes. He edged out of her arms and touched her cheek tenderly as his eyes filled with concern.

  “Ally, this cannot happen and you know it,” he said.

  She squeezed her eyes shut as shame and guilt flooded every crevice, every organ, every cell of her body. The tears started again, this time falling for Cole and not the pain he’d inflicted on her but the pain she was certain she’d inflicted on him.

  “Don’t cry, Ally,” Robby said, holding her hand. “Stop. It’s okay. It was an accident – not something either of us meant to do. It was just something comforting between two friends, that’s all.” He kissed her forehead as if to prove his point. “You love Cole. I know that, you know that, and Cole knows that.”

  She nodded her head, too ashamed to open her eyes and look at him. Too embarrassed, also. He continued to push her hair off her forehead and she wished he’d move away and not touch her. She felt dirty enough as it was and had no clue how she’d tell Cole. Her stomach turned again but there was nothing in it to vomit.

  “Do you still want that tea?” he asked.

  “No,” she whispered. “I just want to sleep.”

  “I’ll get you a pillow and blanket,” he said and dashed away presumably to fetch her some bedding. She kept her eyes closed as he returned and carefully lifted her head to stuff a pillow under it and shook a blanket out over her.

  “Um, if you need me, just holler,” he said, obviously anxious to get away from her. “I’ll leave the hall light on, okay?”

  “Yes,” she said in a small voice. “Thanks again.”

  “Sure,” he said. Once she heard the footsteps fade away, the tears started again.

  Chapter Eleven

  Ally woke early the next morning, her head about to explode, and gazed at the clock on top of the entertainment system but the numbers were blurry and it only expounded the pain to try and focus.

  She stifled a groan as she tossed her feet over the side of the sofa. She rubbed her eyes and recalled the previous evening. Her heart fell to her feet as the tears made an encore appearance. She rested her elbows on her knees and carefully cradled her thumping head.

  “What did I do?” she whispered. “I’m a horrible, horrible person.”

  The only response she received was the ticking of the clock and she was glad Robby was apparently still sleeping. She had several problems currently on her plate but the most pressing was her need to escape without aid. Unfortunately, she had no car and no way to get back to her dorm unless she called Jamie and she’d still have to wait for him to get there. By that time, Robby would most certainly be awake.

  She g
ot up and stumbled to the bathroom. She turned on the taps and splashed her face with cold water, drying it with a navy blue hand towel. She turned off the faucet and splayed her hands on the counter, ducking her head. She longed for a nice hot shower and a toothbrush but she’d only get it if she woke Robby and asked him to take her home.

  The light above the mirror reflected off the jewels in the ring Cole had given her a short time ago and a sob rose in her throat. She fought it bravely as she continued to stare at the rubies and diamonds – the simple, yet beautiful, symbol of Cole’s love.

  A light tapping on the door startled her and she jerked her head up, kick starting the throbbing again.

  “Are you all right, Ally?” Robby asked.

  “Yeah, fine,” she said, wincing at the pain that seemed to slice her brain in half. She pushed away from the counter and opened the door. She offered a weak, embarrassed smile which he returned. “Thanks for everything.”

  “Not a problem,” he said. “Come on, I’ll make you breakfast before I drive you home.”

  “That’s not necessary,” she protested.

  “Nonsense,” he said as he grinned at her over his shoulder. “You can’t walk.”

  She laughed as she followed him to the kitchen. “I meant breakfast.”

  He chuckled and she couldn’t help but notice how his muscles bunched beneath the thin t-shirt he was wearing and how the back of his hair was ruffled and pointing in odd directions. It seemed sort of boyish.

  Stop! she told herself. You don’t need to be thinking that way. That’s what got you in this mess in the first place.

  She sighed and he heard her. He reached the kitchen and turned to raise a brow. “Ally?”

  She stopped in the doorway and wrapped her arms around her waist. The pesky tears started leaking out of the corners of her eyes and she cursed them silently, hating the weakness she was displaying.

  “Robby, I’m so sorry about last night. I’m sorry about…everything,” she said, dropping her eyes to the floor, too ashamed to look at him. “I didn’t mean…”

  He moved swiftly in front of her and grasped her shoulders. “Ally, don’t. You have nothing to apologize for, okay? It’s over and forgotten.” He placed his knuckle under her chin and forced her eyes to his. “Water under the bridge, right?”

  She smiled and wiped the tears off her cheeks. “Okay.”

  His smile was radiant as he guided her to a chair. He opened the refrigerator and started gathering breakfast ingredients. He set to work, mixing eggs, preparing toast, and frying bacon. In no time at all, he placed a plate in front of her then turned to fill a glass with orange juice. He prepared a plate for himself and sat beside her.

  “Eat,” he said as she toyed with her fork. “It will make you feel better.”

  “’kay,” she said as she forked some eggs and shoved them in her mouth. She chewed and swallowed. “It’s good. Thanks.”

  “Ally, please stop thanking me,” he said. “It’s nothing, really.”

  She nodded and nibbled on her toast. Her mind was whirring, reliving the events from the night before, and her cheeks heated hot enough to fry more eggs. Her brain switched gears and turned to Cole and she gulped at her juice, hoping it would chase the ever present tears away. She didn’t want to fall apart yet again.

  “So, um,” Robby said, spearing a chunk of bacon. “Are you going to talk to Cole today?”

  “I’ll try,” she said as she dropped her fork. “I don’t know. I was so angry yesterday and I was mean to him on the phone. He’s probably still mad at me.”

  Robby smiled and patted her hand. “I doubt it. I bet he’s feeling as miserable as you.”

  She lifted her eyes as her heart filled with hope. “Do you think so?”

  “Yes,” he said with a laugh. He pointed at her plate. “Are you finished?”

  She nodded and helped him clean up the kitchen. He excused himself to shower and promised to take her home when he was done. She perched on the sofa and glanced at her phone. She hadn’t missed a single call which meant Cole hadn’t tried to reach her. It was just as well – he had probably needed to cool off as much as she had.

  Sighing, she dialed Jamie’s number. If Robby was going to take her home, she was going to need a ride back to campus.

  ***

  Cole slowly woke, and was immediately aware that he was not in a familiar bed but slumbering on yet another hotel mattress. But at the moment, he didn’t really care. He was miserable, plain and simple, and he didn’t want the comforts of home. He didn’t want to wake in his own bedroom and stumble down the stairs to the warm kitchen where more than likely, his stepmother was preparing breakfast for him and his father. He didn’t want to hop in his car and cruise over to one of his friends’ houses to hang out for the day.

  What he wanted was to remain in the strange bed with the blinds drawn and the television off. He wanted to keep his eyes closed and not think of anything at all – not music, not shows, not appearances and definitely not Ally.

  He groaned and flopped to his stomach. He yanked the spare pillow out from under him and placed it over his head. He knew he had handled the situation with Ally poorly but he had honestly thought she’d overreacted. Still, it had been a long time since they’d argued that way and he placed most of the blame on the stress of being so far apart for such a long time.

  He’d call her later – he just had to – he hated when they were on the outs. He wasn’t quite sure what he’d say but he was sure they’d work it out somehow. They had to.

  A knock on the door managed to penetrate the pillow buffer on his head. He ignored it and kept his eyes closed. He had no intentions of moving until he absolutely had to move. The knocking continued and he continued to ignore it. If it was important, they could call. Maybe he’d answer the phone.

  The knocking finally stopped and he relaxed again, allowing his body to melt into the mattress. That’s just what he needed – a morning of total rest and relaxation. He’d have it, too. He’d demand it. If anyone dared to interrupt him, he’d rip off their head.

  He grinned under his pillow.

  ***

  She paced her living room, cell phone in hand. She wanted to call him, knew that she should, but she wasn’t sure what exactly to say. Did she dare tell him that she’d…kissed Robby? She didn’t think she could. She didn’t want to hurt him in the least and figured it would be best if she waited to confess her little indiscretion at a later time. But she didn’t like it at all.

  She dropped to the sofa and opened her phone. She hit his number and pressed the phone nervously to her ear. It didn’t take long at all for him to answer.

  “Princess,” he breathed. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes,” she said and burst into tears. She closed her eyes and leaned her head on the back of the sofa as she attempted to control her emotions.

  “Hey, calm down sweetness. It’s all right – just a little fight,” he said. “I still love you, you know that.”

  “I’m…sorry…Cole,” she stammered. “I should…have…listened to you.”

  “Nah,” he said. “You had every right to be mad but Al, honestly, I didn’t think it was such a big deal. I’m sorry – I guess I should have realized that it would make life difficult for you.”

  She sniffed and reached across the sofa to the end table and fetched a tissue. She blew her nose, mindless that he could hear, and tossed the tissue on the coffee table. “I’ll handle it – I have before.”