Her of the Wood

by Veronica Watts

  "Euodia, Rayne," she gestures to each of them as she says their names, "This is Auston and Ilford. Don't listen to a word they say."

  Ilford steps forward. "Now, Ailie, why you gotta lie to our new friends like that." He turns to E. "We're really very sweet, although," he angles away from Auston, "I'm the better listener of the two."

  Auston shoves him lightly, and Ilford trips over Rayne's outstretched leg. He tumbles onto the mattress and turns to take a good look at Rayne. They both do, but Auston is the one that speaks first. "You're a whole lot of man, aren't you?"

  Ilford pipes in from the floor. "I mean I suppose you could be a whole lotta cat or owl, but man seems like the best bet." Neither Auston or Rayne seem to listen to him.

  Rayne points to the boys as he looks at Ailie. "Brothers?"

  "Not mine, thank God, but yeah, they have to put up with each other."

  "Poor souls." Rayne has now made two jokes in the last ten minutes. He stands. "I'm going to go find Henley and Thackery." He pauses and turns back to Ailie. "If that's all right?"

  "You're not a prisoner, and we don't have locks. Just let somebody know if you're going to leave the torch circle." He nods and looks to Euodia who nods to signal that she's okay before he makes his way out of the cabin. Auston and Ilford start a wrestling match. Ailie turns to Euodia. "You want to get out of here?"

  SIX

  Ailie heads back the same way she brought them in. Euodia keeps her head down, but she slowly remembers that this is not a requirement here. She looks up and out at her surroundings, but she still avoids eye contact. She notices some plants along the footpath and a yard full of chickens. Euodia has never seen live chickens before, but she tries not to slow down or stare too much. She just follows. Ailie leads her past the first row of torches, and the guard they saw earlier comes back a minute after. She waves as they pass by, and Ailie speeds up as she and Euodia move into the thicker part of the forest.

  The waterfall Euodia follows her to is beautiful. The sounds are like those she enjoyed in the creek, but the power is surprising, amplified. Ailie looks back to Euodia and points down the hill. Euodia follows her; it's not as if Ailie could hear her if she tried to argue. The hill is steep, but there are trees and branches to grab onto all the way down. Euodia finds herself thinking of the lost woman from their group. This is the kind of setting they'd found her in. She's almost to the bottom when she looks back up. Thackery was right, there was no way the woman wouldn't have heard it. She sees how easy it would be. One minute a person could be standing on a rock looking out, and with one small step... she lets her gaze fall down quickly, and the damage the step would do is undeniable.

  Suddenly there's a hand on her shoulder, and when she turns to see Ailie, the woman shouts over the sound of falling water. "Are you okay?" Euodia doesn't answer right away. If she's being honest, she is feeling a little dizzy. "Do we need to head back?" She doesn't want to stop Ailie's fun, so she smiles and shakes her head. Ailie leads Euodia to a rock by the pool at the bottom of the falls. Euodia remembers reading about this in a science book. The water erodes the stone over millions of years, creating swimming holes, like their calm is the reward for surviving the waterfall.

  After a few minutes of sitting, Euodia feels better. She looks around for Ailie and sees her in the water. Euodia knows what swimming is, but workers couldn't use the exercise pools in Dracon. As Ailie swims towards the other shore, Euodia moves forward to take off her boots and put her feet in the water. As the cool sweeps around her feet, she sees Ailie's clothes on the shore.

  Of course workers changed and showered around each other, but this was not a confined living quarter. This was the wild. This woman wasn't another worker. Euodia looks up and loses her train of thought. Ailie has climbed up onto the other shore. Her entire body is as toned as her arms, and droplets of water fall from her warm skin with each step. She looks ready to take on the world.

  Euodia isn't sure if she wants to be her or to be with her. Either way, the woman has officially captivated her attention. Ailie disappears around a rocky outcrop, and Euodia shakes herself a bit, trying to come back to her senses. She takes some of the cool water in her hands and rubs it on the back of her neck. She has no idea if this is acceptable here, and she wants to stay. She's hidden her entire life. She will continue to hide until she learns the rules.

  As Euodia pushes her thoughts away from Ailie, guilt creeps in. She left the only woman she's ever loved in the city. Orchid chose to stay, and Euodia left, and less than a few days later, she's watching this new woman. She can't stop herself from thinking about what Orchid is doing and what she would think if she were here.

  Ailie reappears pretty quickly and swims back with one hand held up out of the water. Euodia turns away as Ailie pulls herself back onto the shore. Pulling her own feet from the water, Euodia wanders over to a plant and feels its leaves. They are waxy, shiny in the sun. She hears Ailie walking up behind her and turns her head to see that she is dressed and holding her hand out.

  The berries are small and black. The sun pulls out tones of blue and purple, but the darkness is beautiful and inviting. Each is the size of a fingertip and made up of myriad beads all joined together. One of the beads must have popped because there is dark purple juice on Euodia's finger after she puts the berry in her mouth. It is sweet, almost manufactured, like something you would taste in the city. Euodia's eyes show surprise and Ailie smiles before popping one of the berries into her own mouth. They sit together by the water and each eat another berry from the large handful Ailie has brought back.

  Ailie is the first to speak. "So what brought you out here?"

  The question is so straight forward, and just like with Callie, Euodia isn't quite sure how to answer it. "Well, I sort of chose to come." Ailie stares at her blankly. This is obviously something she's never heard before. She asks no further questions, just continues to look at Euodia, waiting for her to say more. The silence grows with expectation until Euodia has to speak. She is unaccustomed and more than unfamiliar with expectation when it comes to conversation. "I was tired of being stifled. Being in the background is all I know. I could feel it seeping into my bones. I needed a way to fight it, and I couldn't do that there."

  Ailie isn't smiling. She's thinking. Euodia feels like she's catching her breath, like sharing this out loud has exhausted her. Ailie holds the last berry out to her. "No one will put you in the background here."

  It's the kindest, most real thing anyone has ever said to her.

  They walk back to camp quietly. There are a few noises here and there in the woods. Euodia jumps and looks towards them each time, but Ailie is cool, collected. She is comfortable here. As they approach the invisible boundary again, and step forward, Ailie waves to the woman keeping guard. "Hana, this is Euodia."

  Euodia smiles and nods as Hana reaches out a hand. Euodia forces herself to look into the woman's eyes as she shakes her hand. The rush is incredible. Not only is she encouraged to make eye contact, but there is no major reaction in any way. She came here to create a new life, and these little actions were how she planned to do it. If she came here to be herself, unapologetically, she needs to act like it. Ailie steps forward, taking Hana by the hand and leaning her head on the taller woman's shoulder. Euodia's heart speeds up. "Hana is my sister."

  Euodia can feel her smile fall before she realizes she's saddened. She doesn't necessarily want to see Ailie in a relationship, but at least if she was in a relationship with a woman, it would tell Euodia where the people in Solace stand on the matter. She realizes they're both looking at her as she's tossing thoughts around her mind. It will be difficult to remember that she is expected to speak. "It's nice to meet you." It's all she can think to say, but it seems to be enough. Hana says that she'll be in soon. Her replacement is supposed to be out around dark.

  Ailie and Euodia head back to town as Euodia thinks about how comfortable both of the women seem. "How long have you and your sister been here?"

&nbs
p; Ailie doesn't pause. "Twenty-one years for me. Twenty-three for her."

  Euodia had never heard of kids being reassigned, but there's always so many running around the city that no one but the family, if there were one, would notice. "You didn't come here together?"

  Ailie turns to Euodia and smiles. "I'm just messing with you. We were born here."

  Euodia stops walking and Ailie stops with her. She hadn't thought of this as a possibility. Ailie has no idea what life in Dracon is like. That explains why she is so easy, so comfortable. This place really is her home. Ailie puts her hand on Euodia's shoulder. "You okay?"

  "It's just been a long day." This morning she had woken up in the wilderness practically alone. Now she's in a community, like she'd hoped for, but is still unsure about how much of herself she can show. She's still hiding.

  As the sun sets around them, the fires seem to grow brighter. Ailie leads Euodia back to the cabin. "I'm going to stay up for a bit, but I'll be right in there if you need anything." She points to another building down the path. "There's a latrine over there." She points to the furthest corner that they can see, on the edge of the buildings.

  Euodia can feel her head starting to swim. "I really just want to lie down." Ailie nods and turns to leave. Euodia walks into the cabin. There is no one else around, which at least helps differentiate it from the tower. She climbs to her bunk and looks out the window. She sees Thackery, Henley, and Rayne walk by. They go into the same building Ailie had pointed out. She watches the light die down and the people walk around until she falls asleep.

  When Euodia wakes the wind is pushing through the trees. She can hear breathing around her and see that the moon is high in the sky. She closes her eyes and rotates to see if see can fall back asleep, but every noise grows louder. She can hear the crackling of a dying fire. The air around her is too warm, and too full of breath. It takes her back to nights packed in with other workers, crammed into a space too small with no escape. She slows her breathing, but it isn't calming her down like it used to. Eventually, she sits up. She has a choice here.

  She takes the rolled-up mat she'd been using as a pillow and hops down as quietly as she can from her bunk. She tiptoes towards the door until she hears a shuffle behind her. She looks back to see Rayne propped up and watching her. He doesn't say anything, but his eyes show concern. "I just can't sleep in here. I'll stay nearby." He lies back down and rolls onto his side.

  Euodia opens the door as quietly as she can and steps onto the porch, where she drops her mat and stretches. Her fingers brush the boards of the overhang, and she takes in the deepest breath she can. The community is quiet. There's a dog walking down the path towards home, but that is the only soul she finds. She looks around and sees a length of net at the end of the porch, tied up between two poles. She had seen someone lying on it earlier and wondered how he kept from falling off.

  She walks over and rubs her hand along the net. She pulls the edges apart and is surprised by the expanse it covers. She turns and sits delicately, making sure her entire backside is covered by net and keeping her feet planted on the floor. When she feels she has her balance, she leans back slowly, so slowly that she can feel the movement quivering her muscles. Eventually, her back is on the net behind her, and her feet come up off the floor. She's still wearing her boots. She keeps her balance on her back as she unties the laces and removes them. The net is much more stable than she expected. She turns to stretch out full length and falls asleep quickly, held comfortably aloft.

  SEVEN

  Henley wakes her the next morning. "Euodia, you don't want to be late for breakfast with her majesty." There haven't been any kings or queens in modern history. They're all stories, but then, this place is just a story in the city too. Euodia stretches and pulls on her boots, wondering about the hierarchy of Solace. She stands carefully. The net is great for sleeping, but she's still feeling a little unsure about the process of getting on and off it.

  She follows Henley and hopes they'll stop somewhere to wash up. She isn't accustomed to feeling so unkempt. The worker showers may not have been luxurious, but they were warm and mandatory. She sees Henley head straight into the meeting house and, unaware of another option, follows. There are large bowls on one side of the room, and people are washing their hands and faces. She watches carefully as she walks over and notices a pattern. The first few bowls are for washing hands. The next few bowls are on a separate table and seem to be for washing faces. Then there are a few pitchers of water at the end. People are taking a sip, swishing it around in their mouths and spitting into a large tall vase on the floor.

  Euodia cringes, but as she looks around, no one else seems bothered by the spit vase. Callie is washing her face and Jenson is cleaning his mouth. He's standing close to the man Lorna called Jobe, and he looks at him as if surprised while he swishes the water around. Thackery, Henley, and Rayne are all washing their hands, though she watches as they step out of line after that, satisfied with their morning cleanliness.

  She approaches an empty bowl and washes her hands. The water is cool and fresh. She doesn't see any towels, so she shakes them and lets them air dry as she walks over to the next table. She leans forward to rub the water from the next set of bowls onto her face, and there is a smell she can't place, almost medicinal. Again, she sees nothing to dry off, so she lets her face air dry as she makes her way over to the pitchers. She lifts a yellow pitcher, glazed and worn and heavy in her hands, and takes in a mouthful of minty water. She waits for the others standing near the vase to walk away. Most people have been spitting from a standing position, but this is new for her, and she worries about aim, so she leans over the vase to spit into it. This is the wrong choice as it gives her a clear view of the separated mixture of herb water and spittle swirling around at the bottom of the tall piece of pottery. She spits with her eyes closed and walks away as quickly as she can.

  Looking around the room, she sees Ailie talking to Broderick, and while her face is smiling, she seems a little exasperated. Euodia sees Ailie say a quick goodbye and tag along with a passing friend to wash up. Rayne, Henley, and Thackery are sitting together. Jenson is sitting with Jobe, and Callie gestures Euodia over to the empty seat on her right. Vaness and Morten don't seem to be nearby. Callie speaks up as Euodia sits down. "How was your sleeping space?"

  "Fine." No need to go into specifics. "And yours?"

  Callie smiles. "We slept in a room with a bunch of old people. I felt like reassignment was going to burst in with so many of us together, but the beds are soft, and the fire kept us toasty. "

  "It's summer." Euodia had been plenty warm, and she had had the breeze cooling her down.

  "Old bones ain't what they used to be." Callie shrugs and lets out what has become one of her regular coughs.

  Lorna enters through the door at the back of the building and walks to the head of the table. A few others follow her in with platters of vegetables, fruit, bread, and meat. They are passed down the table, and each person puts what they want on the plate in front of them. Euodia takes a small amount of each and, looking around, finds that she still has less than most around her, even though this would be considered a large meal for a worker in the city. They eat in silence. When most are finished, a jug of water is passed around and each person pours some into the cup provided.

  The room is full of the same people who were here yesterday. Euodia wonders if they are some kind of a council. Lorna is obviously the leader, and Euodia notices that the room is mostly women. Jobe and Oburn were the two men whose names she had learned yesterday. There's one she has not met, but there are five women, including Lorna, to those three men.

  Lorna starts the conversation simply. "How was your night?" She looks around to each of the newcomers. Henley and Thackery speak up first. "Good."

  "Fine." Jenson seems happy, almost bubbly. Rayne nods in agreement, and Callie has a smile across her face. Euodia mumbles something affirmative, and then Jenson pipes back up. "I spent the night thinking abo
ut how this is a miracle. Most of us in the cities don't think that these places are real. I thought..." His voice breaks, and he takes a moment to recover. "When we were left out here, I thought I would die soon, living hard until then. I was a little afraid to fall asleep last night because I thought this, you, might be a dream." He's looking around the room as he speaks, and all eyes are on him. "When I woke up this morning to find the room and the people still around me, well I'm not ashamed to say I let out a few tears. Thank you for inviting us in." He looks like he might let out a few more, and there are tears in Euodia's eyes and in Thackery's.

  He had said what the rest of them were unable to express. Euodia had had faith that this place was real, but she still feels overwhelmed at the reality. This isn't a few people scavenging to get by. This is a community, and they have been taken in.

  Finally, Euodia speaks. "I'd like to know how we can repay you. You said that this is a working community, and I would like to be able to contribute."

  Lorna smiles. It's a smile that a person wants to see again, which makes Lorna a person people want to please. "Thank you, Euodia." Her eyes are focused as she speaks to Euodia, as if no one else is sitting at the table, but her words are directed to the whole group. "Does anyone have anything particular they would like to do? Callie, you said that you work with textiles. We may not have factory machines, but I think you might be impressed by some of the technology that we do have."

  Callie's eyes are bright. "I don't need machines. I'm happy to work with my hands."

  Euodia wonders what else Lorna and Callie have had time to talk about. Jenson, Rayne, Thackery, and Henley all talk about their experience cultivating and working with food. Euodia tries to find words, anything to make her sound helpful, but she's still empty handed when Lorna turns back to her. "Euodia, is there anything particular that you're interested in?"