Zane (Alluring Indulgence)

by Nicole Edwards

  Zane had to clear his mind just to get the memory to dislodge. It wasn’t something he thought about often. The feeling of Beau’s mouth wrapped around his dick made him uncomfortable, but at the same time, it sent shockwaves through his system. It was hard to deny how fucking hard he’d come that night. Right down his best friend’s throat.

  “I didn’t mean to put you in that position,” Beau began.

  “Listen, man –” Zane wanted to tell him to forget about it. What was done was done, but Beau cut him off.

  “I need to say this, so just hear me out.”

  Zane clamped his mouth shut. He didn’t look at Beau, but he did nod his head in agreement.

  “I didn’t expect it to happen like that, and I know it made you uncomfortable.”

  When Beau didn’t continue, Zane had to bite his lip to keep from saying anything. He knew the conversation wasn’t over, but he suddenly wished it was. He wanted to pretend it didn’t happen, but for some reason, he could sense Beau needed to get this out.

  “I won’t lie, I've thought about doing that for quite some time.”

  Zane’s discomfort level increased.

  “I never thought it actually would happen though. I’m not sure what that makes me...”

  The sentence hung between them in the humid night air. Zane didn’t know how to comfort his friend and he didn’t know if he were supposed to.

  “Maybe I’m gay, maybe I’m just curious. I don’t know, but it felt so fucking good.”

  Zane wasn’t prone to blushing, but he felt the heat infuse his face. This was the honest to God most unpleasant conversation he’d ever engaged in, but he knew it had to happen. If they expected their friendship to continue, it was only fair that Beau had his chance to say his piece.

  “When you touched me...”

  Again, Beau let the words hang between them and Zane remembered the way he’d rolled the condom on Beau that night. The passion he’d witnessed in V’s eyes had spurred him on. She’d gotten off on it. Why, he had no idea. The memory made his dick stir in his jeans, and he tried to ignore it. Truthfully, it hadn’t been awful.

  “Man, I’m so fucking sorry,” Beau groaned and then pushed to his feet.

  “Sit down,” Zane ground the words out, looking up at his friend for the first time. “Fucking sit down. Let’s talk about this. As uncomfortable as it is, it’s not going to just go away.”

  Beau’s reluctance was palpable, but he did sit back down.

  “Is that all you’ve wanted to do?” Zane wasn’t sure why the hell he asked the question and he really didn’t know if he wanted to know the answer, but it was out there now.

  “No.”

  That was an honest answer if Zane had ever heard one.

  “Are you bisexual?” Another random question and Zane wanted to sew his lips shut. Were they actually having this conversation? Was he really talking to his buddy about sex? Talking about what happened between them and a woman was one thing, this... this was not normal. At least not according to Zane’s definition.

  “I don’t know. I’ve never been with a guy.”

  Zane looked over at Beau, the question probably obvious on his face but he asked it anyway. “That was your first time to give a dude a blow job?”

  “Yes.”

  Beau was at least consistent with his one word answers every other question.

  “Do you want to do it again?” Fuck, that did not come out right.

  “Yes.”

  Son of a bitch. Zane was digging a hole that he wasn’t sure he knew how to get himself out of.

  “With me?”

  “Yes.”

  Fucking A.

  The silence descended on them for longer than was probably necessary, but Zane didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know what to ask. Didn’t know whether he really wanted to know more. His best friend, the guy he’d known all of his life, just told him he wanted to suck his dick. The worst part about it all, the idea didn’t repulse him. And Zane honestly didn’t know what to think about that.

  “I won’t though. You don’t have to worry about that.”

  Zane didn’t answer; he just continued to stare out at the dwindling foliage behind his house. In the summer, the trees were thick and green, but now that it was technically winter, or close to it, the trees were getting bare. He was distracting himself. He knew it, and Beau probably knew it too.

  “Why’d you ask that?” This time Beau stunned him with a question.

  He had no idea. “No fucking clue.” There, that was honest.

  “Look, Zane. I didn’t mean to bring it up. I just don’t know who else to talk to about it. I guess I’m just confused. I hadn’t expected that to happen, but I won’t lie, when V gave me the opportunity, I wanted to take it. If you’d have said no, I would’ve backed off.”

  “I did say no,” Zane reminded him.

  “Yeah, but you didn’t mean it.”

  No, no he hadn’t put any conviction behind the word at the time. What did that say about him? Was he gay? He was pretty sure the answer to that was no. Did he enjoy it? If he were honest with himself, he’d have to say yes. Did it bother him to touch Beau’s dick? The answer to that would be no as well. Fuck. Now he was confused.

  He thought about V and how fucking hot she made him. With just a look, V had the ability to make his dick throb. Zane didn’t say another word, unsure where the hell this was actually going. The only thing he knew for sure, nothing would be happening between him and Beau unless V was there.

  That one word shook him to the core. Unless. Was he saying he was ok with this?

  Did this make him bi-curious?

  ♀♂

  V hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but when she’d walked in Zane’s front door and hadn’t seen him, she’d automatically ventured to look out on the back porch. She knew Beau was here because his truck was parked outside.

  The sliding glass door that led to the back porch was slightly ajar, and one thing led to another. V was rooted in place, riveted by the conversation between the two men. In fact, the way they continued to evade the main issue was turning her on. Whatever it was about the way Beau had given in to his curiosity gave her chills when she thought about it.

  She and Zane hadn’t talked about what happened that night, although she fully expected to get the brunt of his anger in the light of day, but it hadn’t come. Based on what she heard now, she couldn’t help but wonder whether there was going to be a repeat. She was both intrigued and a little angry. Would Zane not consider that cheating? Would he experiment, regardless of who he was with, and think that was ok if she didn’t know about it? She definitely didn’t agree.

  Stepping out onto the porch, she promptly caught the attention of both men and Beau went from pale white to bright red in the blink of an eye.

  “What are you boys doing?”

  “How long have you been standing there?” The question from Zane sounded more than a little angry.

  “Long enough.” V was going for the truth, knowing she’d only be caught in a lie, and it would do nothing but piss him off more.

  “Long enough for what?” Zane wasn’t happy. V watched as he glanced over at Beau and then back up at her.

  “Long enough to hear Beau apologize.” There, maybe that would ease some of their tension.

  No such luck.

  “Goddamn it, V!” Zane exclaimed and stood up, causing her to take a step back. It was an automatic response, and the angry look in his eyes didn’t dissipate. “I fucking hate that shit.”

  “What shit?” V asked, the heat in her blood no longer due to lust. She was just as pissed as Zane, if not more so. “That I might’ve overheard you considering cheating on me with your best friend?”

  Zane stared at her, his eyes locked on hers, the aforementioned anger now fully boiling.

  “This is none of your fucking business, Vanessa.”

  V felt as though she’d been slapped. As much as the words stung, she knew them to be true. She shouldn’t ha
ve been listening. She violated their privacy in a big way and based on how quiet Beau was, she knew she’d gone about it the wrong way.

  “I’m... sorry,” she whispered to Beau. She was too pissed off at Zane to apologize to him. “If it’s any consolation, I’m glad you’re talking about it.”

  “Not your business,” Zane clarified.

  V met his gaze once more and then turned to walk inside. Ok, she was running more than she was walking.

  Just when she hit the front door, ready to bolt and never look back, Zane’s gigantic hand slammed against the wood, keeping it shut.

  “Move out of my way,” she ordered him.

  She heard Beau’s entry into the house when the glass door slid closed completely.

  “No.”

  V turned to face Zane, looking right in his eyes. “I said I was sorry. What more do you want from me?”

  Zane’s hand was still against the door, over her shoulder, and he was leaning in close. Close enough that she could smell that heady blend of soap and man. “First of all, that was a private conversation.”

  V didn’t respond. She was well aware they hadn’t wanted or expected an audience. She knew that based on the words they’d spoken to one another. An unwelcome jolt of heat speared right through her at the remembered words.

  “That was your first time to give a dude a blow job?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you want to do it again?”

  “Yes.”

  “With me?”

  “Yes.”

  V spared a glance behind Zane. Beau was standing with his head hanging low, but he was clearly listening. He never was the type of man to speak much. The bits and pieces of the conversation between the two men shouldn’t have been any of her business, but it was. She was in a relationship with Zane, and she was sleeping with both of them. That gave her some rights, didn’t it?

  “Do you want it to happen again?” Zane’s words were but a whisper and V’s eyes darted back in his direction.

  “Don’t put this on me,” she answered. This was not about her and they couldn’t use her to try and define the awkwardness that they were experiencing. “You and Beau have to figure this out.”

  “You’re part of this.”

  “Why? How do I even possibly have anything to do with this... this curiosity you two seem to have?” Waving her hand back and forth between the two men, V found that she couldn’t keep still.

  “Because you belong to me. I asked your permission before I shared you, didn’t I?”

  Oh God! V’s stomach lost altitude, and she felt a strange quake deep in her gut. Was he saying? Did he? An acute throb took up residence between her legs, and her thighs tightened.

  She glanced around Zane and found Beau staring at them, his eyes wide, his mouth hanging open. Obviously he had heard the question and he was just as surprised as she was.

  “This isn’t about what might happen between Beau and I. That’s our business. But if it does happen, you’ll be a part of it. Understand me?”

  V nodded her head in agreement, not quite sure what she was agreeing to.

  Zane turned and faced Beau. “I won’t lie to you. You’re my closest friend, and you deserve more than that. What happened the other night... It was strange. I’m not sure how I feel about it. At first, I was adamantly against it. But you’re right. I didn’t say no. At least I didn’t mean it the way I thought I had. That doesn’t mean I’m interested in anything more than an experiment.”

  V watched Beau, noticing how he didn’t move. She wasn’t even sure he was breathing.

  “One time, Beau. Understand me? If you can’t handle that, then you should walk away from this right now. Our friendship still stands, and I won’t ever look at you differently.”

  V waited for Beau’s response. She held her breath anticipating what he would say next. Part of her wanted him to walk away because she knew him better than she realized. He was going to get hurt. He wanted Zane, and she had a feeling it was way more than the curiosity that Zane was caught up in.

  Finally, just when she thought he was going to walk away, Beau met Zane’s gaze. “One time. I can live with only one time.”

  Zane turned back to V, looking down at her. “No matter what happens here, I need to know you’re ok with this.”

  V nodded her head again.

  “I need to hear you say it. If you’re not, we’ll pretend this conversation never happened.”

  V looked back at Beau, seeing the desire brilliantly sparking in those deep brown eyes. When her eyes met Zane’s again, she knew she was all in.

  “Yes. One time.”

  Zane took a step back and then looked back and forth between them. “No matter what happens, I’m in charge. Got that?”

  V heard his declaration, and she was also pretty sure his confidence was suddenly wavering.

  Chapter Twenty Four

  ♂♂♀

  Beau stood motionless in the middle of Zane’s living room. He still wasn’t sure what just happened. An hour ago, he’d found himself sitting on Zane’s front porch, waiting for him to come home. He’d prepared his speech and fully intended to dig himself out of the hole he’d found himself in, not go in even deeper.

  Truth be told, the conversation he’d had with Zane just a few minutes ago was one of the most difficult things he’d ever had to discuss. He apologized for something that still confused the hell out of him. Was he attracted to Zane? More than he thought possible. Did that make him gay? Maybe.

  He’d been battling these feelings for about two years now. Never once had he thought to act on them. He honestly thought it was just an overactive libido and the fact that he and Zane found themselves in intimate situations because of the fact that they shared women between them.

  That made sense. At the time. Then, right after Zane started hooking up with V, Beau felt a shift in what he felt for Zane. Sure, maybe it was just curiosity, but he doubted it. Zane wasn’t the first man that Beau found himself attracted to, but what he felt for Zane was more powerful than anything he’d ever known.

  He couldn’t move from where he stood. Didn’t want to. If he did, they all might just go their separate ways and above all else, Beau did not want to lose his friendship with Zane. They’d known each other all of their lives. They’d grown up together, learned to ride horses together, learned how to satisfy a woman together – and wasn’t that a strange thought.

  No matter what happens, I’m in charge.

  Zane’s words bounced around in his head, and he wondered what the hell was going to happen now. He’d told Zane the truth when he admitted that he’d never given a blow job before. Until him. He’d thought about it plenty of times. Then, when he’d been on his knees, Zane’s cock buried deep in his mouth, Beau had finally felt like that something he’d been missing all this time was being fulfilled. He knew that what happened that night could’ve very easily changed their relationship – hell, it could’ve ruined their friendship.

  But it hadn’t. They were still friends; they’d even shared V again since that night. It was obvious they were about to share her again. This was going to be more though. His nerves were in turmoil, his head was spinning from his thoughts, and his cock was throbbing in his jeans.

  Beau knew that whatever happened here tonight wasn’t going to be more than what it was. Zane was giving in to his curiosity and as much as he knew they’d both probably enjoy it, Zane wasn’t bisexual. One time, that’s what Zane committed to, and he wondered if that were more for his sake.

  Either way, Beau wanted tonight. He’d take it if it were all he could have. One day, there’d be a relationship that made sense to him. He was still interested in women, just maybe not as much as he was interested in men. That still confused him, but he’d learned to live with it.

  “What now?” V’s seductive, sultry tone broke through his thoughts, and Beau looked at Zane. The man had insisted he was in charge. How was this supposed to work? Was there a script they were supposed to foll
ow? Were they just going to strip naked and get it on? For some reason, Beau doubted it.

  Whatever happened though, he just wanted to go through with it.

  ♂♂♀

  Zane heard V’s words. He had asked himself the same question. Looking over at Beau, Zane had the sudden urge to walk up to the man and just kiss him. It was inevitable, right?

  Instead, he made his way to the kitchen and pulled out the whiskey. He needed something to bolster his nerves. If he thought about it too much, he was going to change his mind. The fucking weird thing, he didn’t want to change his mind. He just thought that was what he was supposed to do.

  His dick was harder than fucking iron, and when he closed his eyes, he remembered the feel of Beau’s mouth on him. He could envision what it felt like to roll that condom down Beau’s massive erection moments before he buried his cock in V’s sweet little ass.

  First shot down.

  He should’ve gone for the tequila.

  Zane wasn’t sure what compelled him to go this route, but he was committed. Horny and fucking committed. He was scared too. Yes, even grown ass men got scared. He only hoped he could go through with it.

  Second shot down.

  He didn’t bother turning to look at the two people waiting for him to say or do something. He just stared out the kitchen window, facing the front yard and tried not to close his eyes. When V’s hand touched his back, the memory of the last time they were like this filled his head. Her hand weaved its way beneath his t-shirt this time, and they were instantaneously skin to skin.

  Third shot down.

  As she caressed his skin, Zane felt her lifting the edges of his shirt until she was maneuvering it up and over his shoulders. He had to duck his head so she could get it off of him, but once she did, a chill ran down his spine. It wasn’t cold in the house, not by a long shot.

  Fourth shot down.

  If he didn’t stop this, he was going to be plastered. He was already starting to feel no pain. He glanced over to see V removing the bottle from his reach, and he didn’t admonish her for it. He just kept his focus on the sparse grass and the dirt driveway. He tried not to look at Beau’s truck sitting out front either.