Undeniably Asher (The Colloway Brothers Book 2)

by Kreig, K. L.

  “Tell me about these,” I say softly. “They’re very sexy.” I think back to just an hour ago when I was tracing each pattern with my tongue and impossibly, I feel myself getting wet again.

  He brushes aside a stray hair that’s fallen in my eyes, tucking it behind my ear. The move is soft and seductive. Loving. He treats me like blown glass one minute and a raunchy sex toy the next. I love it.

  “The first one means family. The next two stand for older brother, one each for Gray and Luke, and the last stands for younger brother, Conn.”

  I laugh. “Oh, I bet Connelly loved it when you got that.”

  “Pitched a hissy fit like a little bitch.”

  That makes me laugh harder. “I love that you have a great relationship with your family, Asher. It’s very…endearing. And refreshing.”

  “I’m lucky, I guess. We have our issues, like any other family, but…yeah. I have a great family. The best parents and brothers a guy could ask for.” He pauses. “I’m sorry you didn’t have that, Alyse.”

  I’m sure Asher knows the basics, but I wonder how much he actually knows. His family was idyllic. Mine was…dysfunctional to the nth degree. Our voices soften. It feels like story time has given way to confession. And confession is something I am not good at. It takes me a minute to answer. “Me too.”

  “Do you miss your dad?”

  Do I?

  “He had a sickness, you know, a disease, but he tried his best when he wasn’t sucked into his gambling so deep. When he managed to stay away, he was actually a good dad.” I thought maybe he had finally beaten it, until a few months before Livia disappeared, when he seemed to fall back into it. He was at his worst then.

  “When Livia was gone for those few years, he was honestly the best he’d ever been and then he got cancer. I wish she could have seen him then. Until he became so sick and weak, those were probably some of the best times I remember with him. But at the same time it made me angry, because I had a glimpse of what it could have been like if he wasn’t an addict.”

  “I’m sorry, baby.” His soft lips touch my temple. “Have you told her that?”

  “No. Livia has her own jaded views of our father. I mean, I can see where she’s coming from to some degree. He was imperfect. We all are. But I think it’s interesting how two people can grow up in the same house and view their parents in such a different light. He hated the way he was. He just…couldn’t help it. I think Livia saw it as a weakness, but I viewed it more as a sickness. One he just couldn’t find the cure for.”

  “I think I know what you mean. I feel that way about Luke. The way he talks, you would think we had different fathers. My parents weren’t perfect, but they were pretty damn close, and I never understood how Luke could feel that way about our dad.” He pauses briefly. “You seem to have a pretty good relationship with your sister.”

  I’m not really sure how to answer that. I want to have a good relationship with her. Another thing I can’t let go. I hate that about myself. The inability to forgive and forget. “I—It’s complicated.”

  “Most relationships are. How did you get this?” he asks, tracing the scar just below my sternum.

  “What is this? Twenty questions?”

  Laughing, he pulls me tight. “I have hundreds of questions, Alyse. Thousands. I told you I want to know everything about you. Every scar, every wound, every hurt. I’m going to heal each and every one of them.”

  I smile. “Wow. Theatre and medicinal prowess? Who knew you were so talented?”

  “Oh, baby. You have no idea the things I’m capable of.” His fingers tickle my sides and I giggle. “Now, the scar.”

  I sigh. I hate talking about that day. I hate thinking about that day. I hate remembering that day even happened. But I figure since Livia was dating Gray at the time, he probably already knows I was in an accident, so I can at least talk about that without revealing the whole sordid story.

  “I was in a car accident my senior year. They had to remove my spleen.”

  “Yes, I remember. I tried to come see you and your father wouldn’t let me up. Then I had to get back to school so I couldn’t come back.”

  “Really?” I ask, surprised. “I never knew that.”

  “Yes, really. I would have at least thought he’d tell you.”

  “He didn’t,” I mumble. He was probably too distraught that he had to sit in a hospital chair versus a poker one.

  “You were in the hospital for a few days right?”

  “Yes.”

  “Didn’t the driver die in that accident?” he asks quietly.

  I stiffen and he pulls me tighter. “Yes,” I answer on a choke.

  “A friend?”

  “I don’t like talking about it,” I say softly. Tears prick over another man that are most unwelcome in this moment with Asher. A reminder of no matter how much I try to put that part of my life behind me, I just can’t seem to cut the cord and leave it there.

  “I’m sorry, baby.” I feel his lips on the top of my head. I’m surprised at how much they comfort me.

  He doesn’t ask any more questions. I don’t offer any more information. We’ve gone silent again, but it’s not uncomfortable.

  “Tell me what your tattoo means.”

  Wow, he’s really going for the jugular and he doesn’t even know it. I was grateful that we’d moved off the topic of the accident, but this one isn’t much safer. I hadn’t even realized he’d seen the small tattoo on the inside of my ankle. He hasn’t mentioned it once.

  “What do you believe in so much that you had that word inked on your body?” he prods.

  It’s so simple, but often the simplest words mean the most. It’s a reminder that my life is worth so much more than I thought it was at my lowest point. The day I got it is a day I’ll never forget.

  It’s life.

  It’s hope.

  It’s second chances.

  It’s a future that I almost selfishly deprived myself of because I was too depressed to realize that my emotional agony would eventually become bearable.

  But I don’t say any of those things. Instead, I settle for my usual MO. Being vague. It requires a lot less explaining.

  “A lot of things and sometimes nothing at all.”

  “That’s pretty cryptic, baby.”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “Alyse…I want in.”

  “I know,” I whisper. “I’m trying. It may not seem like it, but I am. I’ve never shared with anyone what I just shared about my father.”

  I’m back to lying in the crook of his arm, but he rolls me over so I’m now pinned underneath his heavy weight. He takes my face in his strong hands, eyes searching mine, thumb stroking my bottom lip.

  “I want every single part of you.”

  Breathing becomes difficult and not because he’s heavy, but because the conversation now is. I know exactly what he’s asking. I want to give it, but I’m terrified that he’ll look at me differently once he knows my dirty, dark secrets. I can’t expose myself like that without knowing where this is headed.

  Those damn tears return. “What if you don’t like them?”

  “Alyse, there’s nothing you could tell me that would scare me away. I’ll love every part of you.”

  Doubtful. “I don’t want to be just a fling,” I respond instead. I won’t survive it. I’m already too invested in him.

  His eyes soften. “This is so much more than just sex to me, Alyse. I was kind of hoping this would turn into forever.”

  The pathways from my brain to my lungs are singed by those romantic words, rendering me breathless. “I—I don’t want to get hurt, Asher.”

  “Neither do I, baby. And with the way I’m feeling about you, if you don’t feel the same, I… Jesus, I like you, Alyse. A helluva lot. More than a lot.”

  “Me too.” I confess through the lump in my throat. I’m falling so hard and fast for him, I’m freaking out. My insides are quaking so much that all thoughts about why this was ever a bad idea ar
e crushed to dust under the heavy weight of the emotional avalanche.

  “Alyse,” he whispers reverently before taking my mouth in a soft, slow kiss. I expect him to deepen it, I expect him to ravage me, but he doesn’t. He worships my mouth, my body, and my soul.

  Slowly.

  Passionately.

  Thoroughly.

  He makes unmistakable love to me, telling me with unsaid words what we both feel, but what is probably too early to voice.

  I am undeniably in love with Asher Colloway. If I hadn’t admitted it to myself before tonight, there’s no refuting it now, just like there’s no refuting the love pouring from Asher into me with each reverent touch or each slow thrust of his hips.

  I’ve given him my body.

  I can’t keep him out of my heart.

  But I have to wonder…once I let him into my mind and he sees the real me, will he want to stay?

  Chapter 19

  Alyse

  “I’m glad you said yes,” Cooper says before taking another bite of his bison burger.

  “Me too,” I reply, looking longingly at his burger as I stuff some bland lettuce into my mouth. With Livia’s wedding just a few short weeks away, I have the requisite five pounds to lose. Or…at least not gain.

  “I’m sorry, I forgot to bring the contract I need signed.”

  “Really? Are you sure you didn’t just want an excuse to see me again?” I tease.

  His smile is contagious. “Caught me. I’ll check my calendar and see when I’ll be back in the city and give you a call.”

  “You can just email it, you know.”

  “But this is a lot more fun.” He winks. “So how long have you lived in Chicago?”

  “Oh, I don’t live here. I’m just on assignment for a few months.”

  That piques his interest. “Doing?”

  “An audit. I’m a forensic auditor.”

  “Really? A woman with beauty and intellect. I like it.”

  I smile at his compliment. When Cooper called earlier this week asking me to join him for lunch, I almost declined, but there’s something about him that I really do like, so I agreed. Now I’m glad I did. It would be nice to have another friend.

  “So, where do you hail from if not Chicago?”

  “Detroit.”

  “Ah…Motor City. Nice. My cousin spent some time there a few years back. What firm do you work for?” He pops a fry in his mouth and with a smirk hands me one off his plate. I look at it only a couple of seconds before I snag it and devour it before he changes his mind. He winks and I cock a brow, giggling.

  “I work for me. I opened my own company last year. ARK Consulting.”

  “Wow. That’s great, Alyse.”

  “Thanks. What about you? How did you come up with the name of your studio, CB29? I love it. Coming up with a name was probably one of the hardest things when I opened my business.”

  His face lights up.

  “I actually co-own the studio with my cousin. We had a dream of opening our own photography studio when we were younger, so it’s named after our first two initials and we were both twenty-nine when we opened it.”

  “I like it. Very creative.”

  Half an hour later, after talking about the challenges of being small business owners, Cooper and I part ways, agreeing to meet for lunch again sometime soon.

  Wrapping my scarf around me in a lame attempt to protect against the bitter winter winds and swirling snow that started coming down five minutes into lunch, I walk faster, wishing the four blocks back to CFC weren’t so damn long and definitely wishing I’d worn anything other than a skirt and heels today.

  Once inside the building, I’m shaking the snow that’s collected on my hair when I hear my name.

  “Alyse, hi.”

  I look up to see the head of CFC security, whom I met in the cafeteria earlier this week, talking to a guard at the front desk. What’s his name again? Casey? No. Craig? No. Conner? Hell, I don’t know, so I settle for a generic, “Hi.”

  I make polite chitchat with someone whose name starts with a “C” for a couple minutes before I beg my leave. He’s a nice enough man, but I’m a little uncomfortable around him.

  It’s after one before I finally reach my temporary office on the thirty-fourth floor. I sit behind my desk with a sigh, still chilled from my short walk but glad I took the much-needed break.

  I’ve spent the last two weeks looking at ledgers and balance sheets and bank statements until my eyes are crossed. With a little over a thousand employees, CFC isn’t that big of a company, but big enough this audit could take me well until January or even February.

  So far, I’ve not uncovered anything that looks suspicious, but I have yet to really dig into the accounting system or start validating vendors against invoices, which is my next project. With the hundreds of third parties that CFC works with, that alone could take me weeks.

  Because of the nature of CFC’s business, I will also need to look at each client account and review billing practices. I may need to pull in Al to help with this after he’s done with his current audit or I could be here for months. Not that I would mind. The more time I spend with Asher, the more I can’t fathom not being able to see him every day.

  I’ve spent every night at his apartment this week. Regardless of my own emotional reservations, I can’t deny that’s where I want to be too. I’ve been trying to keep a little bit of distance, trying to protect my heart, but Asher sees right through me and he’s very convincing. I can see why he’s been so successful in his career. He’s tenacious, like a bulldog.

  Pushing aside thoughts of Asher from my head, so I can get some actual work done, I turn to my laptop and log onto the SAP accounting system that CFC uses. Last week when I met with Aaron Hinton, the director of finance, and one of his analysts, Amanda, they gave me a cheat sheet to understand the vendor and banking codes within the system. As I search my desk for it, though, I’m unable to put my hands on it.

  After ten minutes of hunting, I decide I must have accidentally thrown it away. Picking up the phone, I ring Amanda’s extension first. For one, she’s a little lower level and I don’t want to bother Aaron if I don’t need to for something so inconsequential. For another, I want to limit my time with Aaron. I’ve seen him a couple of times these past two weeks. Both times he’s asked me out for drinks, regardless of the fact that I told him I’m seeing someone.

  Of course, I haven’t told him it’s his boss’s boss’s boss, because, well, that’s just not good for either Asher or me. I need to at least give the appearance that I’m being professional, although Asher makes that as difficult as possible at every turn. Yesterday he found me in the copy room and shoved me against the wall, kissing me passionately for a full minute. Thank God there aren’t that many people on this floor, although I’m quite sure his assistant knows something is up by now. He may not care, but I certainly do.

  Unfortunately, Amanda doesn’t answer and this is the next thing on my list. Because I like to obsessively follow my lists, I’m kind of at a standstill. So reluctantly, I dial the extension Aaron gave me. Lucky me, he answers.

  “Aaron, sorry to bother you. It’s Alyse Kingsley.”

  “Alyse, well it’s no bother at all.” He’s smooth. I’ll give him that. And handsome. On the hot-o-meter, Aaron is about an eight. He meets my tall, dark, and handsome requirements, but he just doesn’t make any of my bells ring. I think Asher’s permanently silenced those for any other man.

  “I apologize, but I seem to have misplaced the legend you gave me for the accounting system. Could you email me another copy?”

  “I’ll just run it up to you.”

  “No need to trouble yourself. Email is fine.”

  “Nonsense. I need to get out of my office for a bit anyway. See you in a few minutes.”

  “Sure,” I mumble before hanging up.

  A couple minutes later a light knock comes at my door before it opens. Aaron peaks his head in. “Knock, knock. Okay to come in
?”

  Why wouldn’t it be? “Yes,” I reply as I stand.

  “Hi. Wow, you look great today, Alyse.”

  I’m wearing a simple white silk blouse tucked into my black pencil skirt. A clear-and-black silver-beaded necklace complements my very simple outfit. I wouldn’t say I look great, but I don’t look too shabby either.

  His eyes slowly rake down my body and when they finally reach mine again, they are full of appreciation. He gives me a panty-dropping smile. I have to admit it’s charming. I find myself smiling back.

  “Thank you. Sorry to trouble you.”

  He walks all the way in, leaving the door open, for which I’m grateful. “No trouble at all. I’m happy to be of help however you need.”

  I don’t miss the underlying innuendo of his thinly veiled attempt at being professional. Smirking, I hold out my hand for the paper he’s now holding hostage in his. “Ah, sorry.”

  “No problem,” I say, taking the document and setting it by my computer screen. “Well, that’s really all I need so I won’t waste any more of your time.”

  “Actually, I was wondering if Amanda showed you some of the shortcuts in SAP to make your job a little easier. Faster.”

  I spent an hour with Amanda earlier in the week, but she just went over some of the basics. I’m fairly familiar with SAP, but CFC has put their own homegrown spin on it, so it’s a little different than what I’m used to. “No, she didn’t.”

  “Well if you have a few minutes, I have some time now to show you.”

  “Sure,” I reply.

  “It may be easier if I come over there and sit with you, if that’s okay?”

  I inwardly groan, wondering if this is some ploy for him to get closer to me, but anything that can shave time off my research will be helpful, so I can’t turn him down either. Damn that Amanda.

  “Yes, fine.”

  For the next forty minutes he walks me through some of the nuances of their accounting system. He even shows me how to run a few simple reports that I can download into Excel for easy filtering and sorting, so I don’t have to wait for someone else to do it. I find Aaron is very intelligent and funny. If I wasn’t head over heels for Asher, I might actually entertain the idea of a date.