My Kinda Song

by Lacey Black

  We’re at Payton and Dean’s place for an unusual sisters’ night. The first weekend in October has brought a new kind of celebration, one where our entire family is together, instead of just the girls.

  My sisters and I are all inside, whipping up another batch of margaritas. (This is our third.) The guys are outside around the bonfire, getting it burned down enough to make s’mores. According to Brielle, it’s a necessity for tonight’s celebration, and I, for one, agree wholeheartedly with her.

  Yes, yes, there’s a lot to celebrate.

  First off, there’s the fact that Payton’s business is alive and thriving. It took three weeks to clean up the damage and make sure the building was a sound structure. Ryan took care of getting all the permits and inspections, and we’re happy to announce that Blossoms and Blooms reopened this past Monday to a line of eager patrons and a fresh new look.

  Of course, it wasn’t easy to get it whipped back into shape. We had to replace the large picture window in the front and had to scrub everything, floor to ceiling. She has new tile flooring and a fresh coat of sunny yellow paint, and looks better than it did the first time she opened.

  Payton also had to replace the electronics system in the building as it took on enough water damage to fry her computers, credit card system, and even one of the coolers. Thank God for insurance. It’s the only thing that saved her from having to walk away from the one thing she built from the ground up. All in all, it was a learning and building experience for her and our family since we all devoted as much of our own time and energy to getting the business back up on its feet. And there was nothing better than seeing the smile on Payton’s face when she flipped the open sign once again.

  Thank God for small miracles. I like to think Mom had a little something to do with this.

  Payton, with Dean by her side, started the adoption process for Brielle. No one really speaks of Brooke, Brielle’s biological mom, but we know she didn’t contest the adoption. In fact, she signed away her rights almost immediately. It’s both a blessing and terribly sad. How someone can just walk away from their own daughter is beyond me, but then again, Payton will be an amazing mother to Brielle, and any future children they may be blessed with.

  Their court date is in December to finalize the adoption. Grandma is already planning the party to celebrate the occasion. I’m also anticipating another big announcement from our oldest sister soon. I overheard Dean telling the guys that he was going to marry my sister as soon as possible. Of course, with everything that happened with the fire, I think his plan has been delayed slightly. But it won’t be long…

  And speaking of engagements, Jaime finally found the ring. It’s on her finger.

  Ryan knew she had been hunting for it after she accidentally found the receipt for his purchase. So one Sunday morning, she woke up and it was there. On her finger. I heard there were tears…and sex (hopefully not publicly).

  “The fire’s ready for s’mores,” Brielle exclaims as she runs inside, in full witch garb. Apparently, she’s practicing for Halloween at the end of the month.

  “We’ll bring everything out in a minute, sweetie,” Payton says, pouring the frothy beverages into tall glasses.

  “How many of these have I had?” I ask, taking a big drink of my peach margarita.

  “Doesn’t matter, Abs. Just drink up,” Jaime says, holding the bottom of my glass and tipping it back a little more.

  “Levi’s gonna get lucky tonight,” Lexi hoots from across the kitchen.

  “He ain’t the only one,” Jaime smirks, taking a drink of her own glass.

  “I miss buzzed up sex,” Meghan says quietly.

  “I’m sorry, Meggy, I shouldn’t have -”

  “No, don’t be sorry. You’re all still living your lives. You don’t have to walk on eggshells because you’re afraid of hurting me. I want to hear all about your happiness, really I do. It makes me smile, knowing that you are all happy.” Her words trail off as fresh tears threaten to spill from her eyes, but she’s wearing a smile and it’s genuine and full of hope.

  “Hey, don’t include me in that little happiness shhhhpiel.” AJ stops and looks at me. “Is that right? Shhhhhpiel? Shhh-pee-uhl.”

  “Spiel. But you’re close.”

  “I’m drunk. And I don’t even have anyone to go have drunk sex with,” AJ pouts, chugging half her glass.

  I glance over at Lexi and see her staring off at nothing. She’s still with Chris, but I wonder for how long. I know she mentioned the possibility of leaving him back a few months ago, but maybe she’s just not ready. All I know is that she’s miserable, and I hate seeing my twin like this.

  “Payton, can I have drunk sex in your bathroom?” Jaime hollers, grabbing the pitcher and refilling her glass.

  “No!” Payton exclaims at the exact same time Ryan walks in and yells, “Yes!”

  Jaime smiles widely as soon as she sees him. “Awww, look. It’s my fiancé. And he wants to have sex with me.”

  “Always, babe,” he says, walking over and wrapping his big arms around her.

  “Drunk sex is almost as good as drunk road-head,” she whispers so loudly I think the neighbors heard.

  “How do I sign up for the drunk road-head?” Levi whispers in my ear as his arms wrap around me. I shiver when his body aligns with mine, his warm breath caressing my ear.

  “Are you asking me or Jaime? She was offering,” I quip with a smile.

  “You. Always you.”

  “This little lady is ready for s’mores,” Grandpa says from the back door. “Why don’t you all quit talking about road-head and sex in Payton’s bathroom and get out here? The witch is ready,” he adds with a smile.

  “How did he know?” Lexi asks, each of us looking from one person to the other.

  “I have excellent hearing,” he reminds us from outside the door.

  We all giggle (because we’re drunk and giggling and booze go hand-in-hand) as we head outside and join the rest of the family. Dad and Dean are warming up the sticks that we’ll use to roast the marshmallows, while Grandma and Bri get the graham crackers and chocolate bars ready.

  “I love s’mores,” I tell Levi, making our way over to the fire. There are not quite enough chairs, but I don’t mind. I just take a seat on his leg and call it good.

  “And I love you,” he replies, a cheesy grin on his too-handsome face.

  “Are we going back to your place tonight?” We hadn’t decided anything when we set out for the night, but that’s typical. We may never plan for which bed we’ll fall into at the end of the evening, but we’re usually together when it happens. Nights like these, we usually head back to his place. While those where he works late, I always find him in my bed when I wake in the morning.

  “We are. Though, it doesn’t matter to me. As long as you’re naked and I’m naked, I don’t care whose bed we’re naked in.”

  “I love the way he says naked,” Grandma says, interrupting our conversation. “It’s all deep and dirty. Like he can’t wait to strip you naked and take -”

  “Why are you talking? You know he’s talking about your granddaughter, right?” I exclaim, drawing attention from those around me.

  “Oh, it doesn’t matter who’s having the sex, Abs, just as long as it’s happening.” She leans in closer and no amount of time could prepare me for what comes out of her mouth next. “It’s the piercing, right? I heard all about it. Drives women wild with passion, Abs. I’ve been thinking of having your grandfather’s love stick pierced,” she says so matter-of-factly that I almost miss the gasps and choking noises coming from those around me.

  My body starts to shake from Levi’s laughter. “Please. Stop talking.”

  “Did it hurt, Levi? I heard they take a while to heal,” she continues with a straight face.

  “Uh, yeah, it didn’t feel great, you know, when I had it done.” Levi adjusts me on his lap to cover up his discomfort with talking about his dick piercing with my eighty-year-old grandmother. “And it took
…a bit to heal.”

  “Like how long?” she goads.

  “Ummm, six months?”

  “Shame,” she tsks. “There’s no way I could go without riding Orvie’s flesh rocket for that length of time.” Standing up tall, she smiles down at me. “Here! S’mores!” she exclaims before flitting away as if she wasn’t just discussing my man’s junk.

  “I swear I must have been having an out-of-body experience. No way did I just overhear our grandma asking Levi about his cock piercing,” Lexi exclaims.

  “Levi has his dick pierced?” Jaime practically jumps up off Ryan’s lap and runs towards us. “Really? Can I see?”

  “No!”

  “Payton! Did you know Levi has jewelry…down below?” Jaime hollers across the fire, ensuring everyone and their brother hears her comment, and making hand gestures as if she’s holding on to his balls.

  “Really? Can I see?”

  “No!” I exclaim once more.

  “Why not? It’s for scientific purposes,” Jaime reasons.

  “You’re not a scientist!” I defend.

  “No, but I could be!”

  “You’re just a nosey woman who wants to see Levi’s junk piercing. Well, we all do. Whip it out, Levi,” Lexi says.

  “No way. You are not all getting a look at my man’s junk. It’s my piercing to ogle over, not yours!” I exclaim, completely forgetting that I could practically reach out and touch my dad.

  “You always used to share your toys with me,” Lexi pouts. “I just want to see it.”

  “Sorry, ladies, but the only woman getting a first-rate, birds-eye view of my piercing is the woman I love,” Levi answers, curling me into his chest. My sisters all groan.

  “I want to get my ears pierced but my friend Sasha says it hurts. You don’t have earrings in. What kinda piercing do you have? Can I see it? Did it hurt? Boys don’t have their ears pierced at my school. Did you get it done when you were in school?” My eyes widen dramatically as I glance over and see Brielle’s sweet little face. Her innocence almost overshadows the fact that she’s asking about a piercing she should know nothing about.

  “Oh, um… Dean?” Levi hollers, fear actually written on his gorgeous face.

  “Thanks, guys,” Dean mumbles as he picks up his daughter. “We’ll talk about piercing your ears later. How about another s’more?” he asks, earning him a chocolaty, toothless grin.

  “Blame Payton,” I tell him as he walks away.

  “Me? Blame Jaime! She’s the one who announced to everyone on the block that Levi has his cock pierced.”

  “Can we stop talking about it?” I plea.

  “I know! Let’s do presents,” Grandma exclaims from her chair.

  “Presents?” I ask, glancing around to all of my sisters.

  “Last time we got a present it was the spawn of Satan,” Ryan recalls, shivering as he thinks about their cat.

  “Boots isn’t the devil’s cat! He’s cute and loving and sweet and perfect,” Jaime reminds him.

  “You’re cute and loving and sweet and perfect,” he says, wrapping his arms around his fiancée and leading her towards a chair.

  “So, I, like, really can’t see it? I mean, I’m your twin. We’re practically the same person,” Lexi quietly says kneeling beside me.

  “You have no shame,” I tell her.

  “None. And maybe if I were getting some at home it’d be different. But since I’m not, well, I think it’s only fair that I get a peek.”

  “Not happening. Go away,” I tell her with a laugh.

  “Fine. Be that way, you stingy whore.”

  “What?!” I exclaim, unable to stop the full-belly laughter from erupting.

  “Fine. You’re not a whore. But you are stingy.”

  “I have lots of presents tonight,” Grandma says, joining us in the backyard.

  She hands a small bag of goodies to Brielle, who finds a witch’s cauldron, green makeup, and striped socks, all to complement her Halloween costume. Then she hands a bag to Jaime and Ryan. They both look at it like there’s a chance it could contain live explosives.

  “I’m not opening that,” Ryan says.

  “It’s an engagement present, Ryan Elson. You have to open it. It’s a gift,” Grandma chastises him.

  Jaime carefully digs in, pulling a beautifully ornate glass vase from within. “Wow, this is beautiful.”

  “It is,” Meghan agrees.

  “It’s the perfect size to hold lube, a cock ring, and those little bottles of warming gel that taste like fruit! All of that stuff is in the bottom of your bag,” Grandma says proudly.

  “Of course, it is,” Jaime mumbles, carefully setting the vase inside the wrapping.

  “Dean and Payton have one too. Theirs is in the bedroom waiting for them. I went ahead and assembled it,” Grandma smirks with a sly grin.

  “I can’t wait,” Payton groans.

  “And one more gift,” Grandma says, handing me a bag.

  “Me?”

  “Well, you and Levi. You’re practically shacking up, having the sex every day, so I thought it was time.”

  My fingers shake and I can feel all eyes on me as I start to pull tissue paper from the bag. My sisters are each speculating on what’s inside, each guess even more embarrassing than the last.

  Pulling out the nondescript brown box, I’m surprised to find the word swing written across it. “You got us a swing? But we don’t have a front porch.” My mind is trying to figure where in the world I’m going to put a swing, and how exactly it fit inside the box. It must be one of those hammocks or something.

  Levi digs into the box and pulls out the black contraption. That’s when reality sets in. My grandma didn’t give us a hammock. Oh, no. My grandparents gave us a sex swing! A freaking sex swing!

  “Is this what I think it is?” Levi asks, glancing my way with mirth and surprise in his eyes.

  “It is! Have you ever used one? They’re so nice and really helps save the back of your partner, Abs. Grandpa and I love ours. Of course, Levi will have to figure out how to hang it from the ceiling. Or maybe Ryan could come over and help him build a stand? This way, you’re not putting holes in your rental,” Grandma reasons.

  “There’s no way I’m coming over to help with that project. Sorry, buddy, you’re on your own with that,” Ryan says, slapping Levi on the shoulder.

  “You got us a sex swing?” I ask, dumbfounded.

  “Oh, there’s more! Keep going!”

  I’m almost too afraid to look, but my face is already as red as a fire truck, so it’s not like this humiliation could get any worse. Reaching into the bag, I find jewelry. No, not the kind of jewelry a normal grandkid would receive from her normal grandma. No, I get penis piercing jewelry.

  “I don’t even know what to say,” I mumble, gazing down at several pieces of jewelry. There’s a tiger’s head, a fireman’s helmet, a police hat, ruler, and an American flag.

  “Do you know how many different heads they have for that jewelry, Levi? I found all of the best ones, perfect for role-playing. There’s a tiger for when you’re feeling extra ravenous, a fireman’s hat, well for when you’re the fireman putting out the flames in her loins. Then the police hat because everyone loves it when the cop arrests the naughty girl and has to show her the error of her ways in the back seat,” she says, continuing as if the group, as a whole, isn’t completely horrified by her fantasies.

  “The ruler is for when you reverse it and she’s the naughty teacher and you’re the schoolboy, Levi.”

  “That’s one of my favorite scenes,” Grandpa says with a wide smile.

  “And finally, the American flag because, well, it was buy four, get one free, and I was feeling patriotic.”

  “Now can we see it?” Lexi begs, her eyes wide and dancing with delight.

  “Absolutely not.”

  “I kinda want to go home and try out the fire hat, angel. I’m feeling like dousing your flames,” Levi whispers, kissing my neck. My entire body is sudde
nly alive and ready to see just how he intends to put out the fire.

  “We should go home,” I suggest, glancing over my shoulder at him.

  “We should.”

  An hour later, we’re finally making our way to Levi’s truck. Dad was taking Meghan and AJ home, and Lexi caught a ride with Ryan and Jaime. So, it’s just us as we head towards our building. The awkward gifts are on the floor between my legs, and if I were being honest with myself, I’m a little excited to see his new jewelry–in place.

  “What are you thinkin’ about?” he asks, reaching for my hand.

  “The fireman hat,” I say boldly, smiling across the cab at him.

  “Me too,” he agrees with a predatory smile.

  “It’s a little weird that my grandma bought you new jewelry for your piercing.”

  “A little? But I’ve learned to never underestimate the level of mortification that can come from such a small woman.”

  “You were embarrassed?”

  “Not me. You. I was fine with it, but I hate that you were so uncomfortable.”

  “You know what will make me feel better?” I ask, unbuckling my seat belt. Levi eyes me questionably before returning his eyes to the road.

  “What?” he asks, stopping at a stoplight.

  “Road-head.”

  He doesn’t know what to do as I reach over and unbuckle his pants, pulling them open and exposing his erection. “No underwear?” I gasp, gaping down, wide-eyed and mouth hanging open.

  “I thought it might speed up the process tonight.”

  “I love the way you think,” I tell him, moving over and kissing his lips.

  “And I love you.”

  Another Epilogue

  Lexi

  The house is quiet as I enter.

  Chris is either still out shmoozing some client, or already asleep. If I had to wager a bet, I’d say he’s sleeping. He only does two things anymore: work and sleep. Sleep and work. He makes no time for me or anything else in his busy schedule.

  I go to the stack of papers on the counter. They’re all there, right where he left them. House plans, listings for property available around Jupiter Bay, kitchen layouts. There are even some financial statements for the investments he’s made on our behalf recently. Everything’s there, neatly stacked and perfectly organized.