Hold Me Close: BWWM Romance (Brothers From Money Book 6)

by Shanade White

  “What a question!” she was spread over his chest with his arms around her. “I love everything about you.”

  “I am serious Jordan,” she raised her head to look down at him and his amazing green eyes met hers. “I want honesty between us and that means everything, not just the big things, but the little things as well.”

  “Okay,” he said slowly, seeing that she was very serious. “I hate that you refuse to accept anything of worth from me, like that diamond necklace I wanted to get you and the several other things I want to buy you; and I hate that you think my wealth is something not to be proud of. I also hate that you won’t accept that we have people working for us. I know you grew up in a home that was not as opulent as this one Jewel, but you have accepted me and you have to accept that I am a very wealthy man. It is not a sin to be rich.”

  She stared down at him and realized that she had been doing just that. Trying to disassociate herself from what he represents, even to the point of not going to his fancy dinners and refusing to wear the expensive clothes he had bought her.

  “It’s your turn,” he told her quietly.

  “It’s going to make me sound petty if I tell you, she murmured.

  “Tell me just the same, honesty and all that,” he told her lightly.

  “You are messy. I get it that you are used to having people pick up after you all your life but I am not used to that and it gets on my nerves. The helpers that work here have this big mansion to take care of without them having to walk behind you and do all that.” She looked at him to see his reaction.

  “Maude,” he said referring to a plump middle aged African American woman who was the head housekeeper. “She was more of a mother to me than my own mother and she disciplined me when I needed it. I was six years old when I started calling her mom. My mother wanted my dad to fire her but my dad told her that if she had been playing her part, I would not have to call another woman mom. Irene,” he was referring to the tall slender Scottish woman who mostly did work for his mother. “does not take crap from any of us and is not afraid to speak her mind. The other two and Stefan the cook are basically the same, they treat me like their child instead of the master of the house and they cater to my needs because they love me. But you are right. I grew up privileged and I am used to being catered to. From now on I will try and do better.”

  “Do I sound like a nag?” she asked him anxiously.

  “A little bit,” he said with a teasing grin. “Ouch,” he murmured as she punched him lightly in his flat stomach. “I love you Jewel and whatever it takes to make you happy, I am up for it.”

  *****

  Caroline knew she was trying too hard but she had gotten a second chance and she was grabbing it with both hands. Her son was relating to her better these days, thanks to Jewel, the same girl she had caused so much misery to in the past. She had gone out and practically bought out the whole baby store but she was worried that Jewel was going to be upset that she had taken it upon herself to do it.

  She had invited her friends over to help decorate the nursery, refusing to get a professional when Caroline had suggested it.

  She was already seven months pregnant and had started cutting back her hours at the bookstore because she had hired someone to help her out there. It was Saturday afternoon. Jordan had taken her out for breakfast and brought her back and then had gone to play golf with some friends. “You are so white,” she had teased him as he lugged his golf clubs down to his vehicle.

  “I am not!” he had retorted. “I am in love with a sister, aren’t I?”

  “You are so not pulling that off,” Jewel had told him dryly.

  “I just need some more practice.” He told her, giving her a kiss on the lips before leaving.

  The girls were on their way over. She had gone into the room designated to be the nursery when Caroline came in. “Hi,” Jewel looked up in surprise. “I thought you had a luncheon with your friends.”

  “They are not my friends,” Caroline corrected her. “And I would rather be decorating my granddaughter’s nursery than being out with a bunch of phonies.” She paused a little bit. “I am afraid I have gone and done something you might not approve of.”

  “Like what?” Jewel looked at her curiously. They now shared a tentative relationship but it was getting better every day.

  She stepped back and allowed several people to come inside the room. There were about ten women and they were all bearing several large bags from a baby store she knew sold only the most expensive things. “I went overboard and practically bought out the entire store.”

  Jewel stared at the mounting number of packages and her eyes widened as she realized that they had gone for more.

  “Do you mind?” she asked anxiously.

  “This baby is going to have more clothes than all of us combined,” Jewel said in amusement, not in the least bit offended. As a matter of fact she was touched at how much Caroline was doing to make up for the past.

  “I am far from being offended.” She told the older woman softly, going over to give her a brief hug which had her staring at Jewel in amazement.

  “Thank you,” she murmured softly returning the hug.

  By the time her friends got there, both of them were knee deep in soft tissue papers.

  Chapter 8

  Jordan stared at the ring in his hand. It was a square cut diamond that shone in the dim light in his office. He had bought it several months ago and was waiting for the right opportunity to give it to her.

  She had not mentioned marriage to him since they had been living together for the past two months. She was eight months pregnant now and swollen with his child and all he wanted to do was to have his ring on her finger and his name added to hers. He wanted his family. Living with her and making love to her every night did not make her his wife, he wanted more.

  “Oh my gosh! That’s a beautiful ring!” He had been so engrossed in his thoughts that he had not heard her come in.

  “I knocked and when I did not hear you, I came in.” the secretary apologized. “So I take it congratulations are in order?”

  Jordan snapped the box shut, irritated that he had allowed anyone to see it before her. He looked at the secretary as if he was seeing her for the first time. She must be around his mother’s age, blonde blue eyes and very attractive and well preserved. His sharp eyes noticed her subtle expensive peach suit and her well groomed hair. They were very well paid at the company but he also noticed discreet diamond earrings in her lobe.

  “Have a seat Marjorie,” he indicated for her to sit on one of the chairs available in front of the desk. “Was it worth it?”

  I beg your pardon?” her light blue eyes stared into his green ones.

  “How long did the affair last?” he asked her.

  She shifted her gaze and settled it on her clasped hands. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

  “I have flashbacks of when I was a teenager and used to come to the office with my dad.” He leaned back in the soft leather chair and gave her his full attention. “I blocked it out for years because I did not want to believe that my father was a cliché. I take it you were well compensated for the time? Clothes, jewelry, expense account and a car, but was it worth it?”

  “I loved him!” she cried, her blue eyes welling up with tears. “I did everything for him and he promised me-“her voice tapered off and she could not look at him.

  “He promised you he would leave his wife and kid and marry you.” Jordan finished the sentence grimly. He rest his head back against the soft leather, suddenly very weary and realized that he would have to replace all the furnishings in the office. “You knew he was seeing someone else? An African American woman the same time he was seeing you?”

  She looked up at him startled. “He told me I was the only one,” she said tremulously the tears falling down her cheeks.

  “And you believe a man who was cheating on his wife with you, that you were the only one,” Jordan sighed wearily. “How lo
ng?”

  “He hired me when I was twenty-two years old and he seduced me two months after.” Her lips trembled pitifully. “I fell in love with him soon after.”

  Jordan looked at her and tried not to let the contempt he felt for her to show. His father had been his hero when he was a young boy growing up and he had thought he wanted to be like him. He had given him a woman to have sex with on his sixteenth birthday and had told him to explore away, she was paid for until the morning and he had thought he had the coolest father ever. Now he knew different and all he felt for him now was contempt and derision. The man had been a pathetic womanizer who used women to satisfy his baser needs and paid them off with material things.

  “Are you going to fire me?” Marjorie asked him tentatively.

  Jordan looked at her. He had almost forgotten she was there.

  “You are very efficient and know the running of the company; I am not so stupid as to think that I don’t need that.” He told her brusquely. “You stay for now.” With a wave of his hand he dismissed her, just wanting to be alone for a little bit.

  “Thank you Mr. McIntyre.” She hurriedly left the office and closed the door behind her.

  He stared sightlessly at the mural in front of him. He wondered if he was eventually going to be like his father. Was it why he hesitated to bring up marriage again to Jewel? He knew he loved her more than life itself but what if after the marriage had been seasoned he decided that he needed more? Was he going to hurt her eventually? He had slept with other women while he had been in Europe but he had always used protection, unconsciously knowing that he only wanted to have a family with one woman and her name was Jewel.

  What if he ended up hurting her?

  *****

  Jewel gave the package to the girl with a smile and a wave. She was going home shortly just as soon as Jordan came to pick her up. He had called and told her he would be by to pick her up in the next ten minutes. It was already June and the summer had been mild so far with a few scattering of showers. The nursery had been decorated and she had spent several nights just looking at the beautiful peach and cream décor and she had played the music on the mobile several times.

  The phone rang just as she was about to reach for her pocket book. “Hi mom how are you?

  “I am fine honey I just got in from the pool. It is so hot you will never believe it. So how is my granddaughter doing?”

  “She is doing great mom.” Jewel settled on the stool, cradling the phone against her ear as she searched for her set of keys for the store. “When are you coming over?”

  “Honey, I am coming before you drop your load don’t worry about it.”

  “I can’t wait to see you.” Jewel told her.

  “I know you don’t want to hear what your old mom has to say but what about marriage? You know I did not raise you to be shacking up with any man.”

  “Mom we are not ready yet. We are trying to get the feel of living in the same space right now.”

  “What does Jordan say?”

  “He has not said anything to me since I moved in so maybe he is okay with the arrangement.”

  “What are you afraid of baby girl?” her mother asked her quietly.

  “I am not afraid of anything but I just want to get accustomed to living with him and make sure that this is what he really wants.”

  “So you are doing this for him?”

  “As well as for me.” Jewel’s voice was defensive and she was tired of trying to explain herself to her mother and her friends. She needed time.

  “You love each other Jewel and the ultimate commitment is getting married. If you are not sure about him, you should let him know now and not wait until he starts resenting you for not loving him enough to give him your total commitment.”

  *****

  “You are quiet. What’s going on?” he asked her as soon as they were half way home.

  “I am just tired that’s all.” She told him with a forced smile. After she had finished talking to her mother, there had not been enough time for her to process the conversation because he had come for her just then.

  He reached across and placed his hand over her bulging stomach. “I want to feel our daughter kick,” he told her softly, driving one handed and looking at her briefly. “I am going to be responsible for a life and I don’t want to screw it up.”

  “You are not going to screw it up.” She placed her hand over his and they both felt it at the same time, the movement of the child inside her womb.

  “I am going to be a father,” he said shakily pulling the car to a stop inside the circular driveway. “I want to get it right.”

  *****

  “Can you tell me what’s bothering you?” she asked him as soon as he climbed into the bed beside her. He had helped her shower and they had had dinner with his mother.

  He closed his hand around her as she settled on his chest. “I am afraid I am going to turn out like my father.” He told her solemnly. He told her of the conversation he had had with the secretary and how he remembered things from the past that made him realize that he had been having an affair with her as well. “I find myself thinking about him a lot and how I used to think he was my hero and how much I wanted to be like him. He was a womanizer Jewel, and I am wondering if I am going to be like him.”

  “And I beg to differ,” she lifted her head to look at him and his green eyes met hers. “You are a wonderful and loving man and you have been in love with the same woman since you were a teenager.”

  “So is there another reason why you won’t marry me?” he asked her quizzically.

  “There is,” she told him with a gentle smile, her hand tracing the dimple in his chin. “I want a fairy tale wedding with a billowing chiffon gown and the whole works and I cannot have that when I have this.” She patted her stomach. “And I want our daughter to be in the wedding photo with us. I want to marry you Jordan and I know for a fact that you are going to be the best husband a girl could ever wish for and I am willing to wait for that day when I can walk up the aisle to meet you, not waddle with someone having to hold me in case I fall.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me all this before?” he switched positions and propped her up against the pillows on the bed with him looking down at her.

  “Because at first I was afraid. I was afraid that you would find that maybe you had made a mistake and you would be just doing it because I was carrying your child. You only said it to me once and when I moved in here with you, there was no mention of it again.” She rested her hand against his jaw and felt the rough growth of hair there.

  “You know that will never be the case.” He bent his head to kiss her softly on the mouth. “I love you Jewel and it will always be you and no one else.”

  “So that answers your question. You are nothing like your father.” She brought down his head and took his lips with hers. “I love you Jordan McIntyre.”

  *****

  “Why did you put up with his infidelities mother?” Jordan asked his mother. They were in the living room having lemonade and talking. Jewel had gone to lunch with her friends and he had not gone in to the office; he had stopped going in on Saturdays.

  Caroline placed her lemonade glass on the coaster on the glass table. She had been waiting for him to ask her that question ever since his father had died. “I thought I loved him.” she said quietly. “I was dazzled by him, his wealth and his charm and I wanted better for my life and he offered it to me.”

  “I will never get how a woman put up with a man who has little or no regard for her.” He had been trying to figure it out for himself and he had been determined to mend fences with her. He had forgiven her but there were still some issues to be sorted out.

  “I knew he was cheating and I ignored it, by telling myself that as long as I had all this,” she gestured around the opulent room. “then I would be okay. I convinced myself of it so much that I found myself believing it.”

  “I am not judging you mother; I am just trying to find myself
in all this. I have asked Jewel to marry me and I want to make sure that I will never hurt her the way dad hurt you.” He leaned forward and took her hands in his. “I want to be more than he was.”

  “You are,” Caroline told him with a tremulous smile. “He was never the man you are because he had to prove to himself and to others that he was a powerful man and he went about doing it the wrong way.”

  “I appreciate you saying that mother,” he squeezed her hands gently before letting go.

  “So you asked Jewel to marry you?” She asked with a smile.

  “I did.” He smiled gently. “I love her so much mother that sometimes I find myself in a panic wondering if I am going to lose her.”

  “Your love has sustained a lot of obstacles and weathered so many storms and still remains strong. You two were made for each other, there is no doubt about that.” Caroline told him with a wistful smile. “I envy that.”

  “Thank you mother.” He told her gently, finally understanding what she had been through.

  *****

  “Jaclyn will you get off the phone!” Savannah called out to the girl. She was in the living room on the phone while she and Jewel were in the kitchen munching on pizza. “You just left Tyler a few minutes ago. What on earth do you have to talk to him about now?”

  “We were making plans for tomorrow,” Jaclyn said defensively putting away the phone. “I can’t help it if I am irresistible.”

  “Irresistible, my ass! The man probably wants a piece of the tail you gave him earlier.” Savannah said with a snort.

  “Okay you two, play nice,” Jewel said with a complacent smile. “Savannah, how is Blake?”

  “He is there,” she shrugged. “He wants to know if he can move into my apartment because that would mean saving him rent.”

  “I hope you told him no, honey.” Jewel said to her.

  “Of course I did!” Savannah bit into her pizza with gusto. “I told him there was no way I would ever fall for that again.”