Desired: Loving An Alpha Male

by S. K. Lessly

  I didn't waste time. I kissed her once on each of her inner thighs. Then I moved to her core, and my tongue and lips brought her to the climax she was craving. After she came down from her high, she started going over the edge again and started moving away from me. I fucked her mind up in that instance as I gripped her thighs in my arms and flipped us both to where my back was on the bed, and she was straddling my face.

  She gasped loudly and looked down at me, stunned. "Drake, what are you..."

  I moved us both up the bed without letting her move from my face. I smacked her ass and said before I sucked and fucked the shit out of her with my tongue, "Fuck my face, baby... Give this pussy to me the way I like it."

  She didn't know what to do at first until I started moving her hips for her. The moment I heard her moan, I knew it wouldn't be long before her hips would be bucking my face.

  I don't do this often. Hell, I have to truly like you to even go down on you. For me to be doing this was fucking with me yet again and still I couldn't think about it. Tonight this woman was mine. Tonight I was going to make her scream my name until she gets fucking hoarse and loses her voice. Then I'm going to still keep going at it until she passed the hell out.

  "Oh God! Drake, please...." She cried as she came apart again and again. She found that rhythm as I knew she would, and she learned to give herself the pleasure she craved. But I craved more. I need to be inside her. I couldn't take it anymore. I pushed her body down to where her pussy was close to my dick, and her lips were inches from mine. Georgia grabbed my ears and kissed me just as I rammed home and sated into the best pussy I have ever had. I told myself to go slow, but she felt too good. So fuck going slow...

  *****

  “Drake, are you awake?”

  I opened my eyes to find hers looking at me through the dark. We’d just completed, I think, round three and she was still lying on top of me. I’d grown accustom to her sleeping on top of me. It’s something about us being skin on skin that soothes me.

  “Yeah, baby, what’s up?” I answered groggily.

  She rested her chin on my chest and started making circles using her fingers.

  She hadn’t been hesitant to express herself around me, so the pause she was taking was causing some alarm. She needed a little push it seemed, so I caressed her back and ass, “What’s going on, baby? What do you need to ask me?”

  She sighed but didn’t reply right away. I grabbed another pillow and put it behind my back and neck so I could see her better.

  She met my eyes and said finally, “Will you tell me something about you that you’ve never told anyone?”

  Shit.

  I watched her. She gave me those intense eyes again and, even though it was dark as shit in the room, I knew they were heavy with doubt, worry, and fear.

  Shit.

  Deflection tactic time.

  “I thought we weren’t doing this, baby?” I asked slowly, trying not to sound heartless. I mean, I am most times, but I didn’t want her to think I was a complete heartless SOB.

  She nodded her head and looked away from my eyes.

  Thank God.

  “Yeah, I know. It’s just…”

  I sat up more, putting my back against the headboard, and she ended up straddling my hips.

  She inhaled and started off speaking softly; apprehension and emotion laced her voice. “When I was fourteen, I got pregnant. It wasn’t by choice; the act of getting pregnant mind you… but there I was, and there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn’t tell my family… God, my life would have been far worse than what it already was. I couldn’t do that, and I couldn’t keep it either so… I decided to end my pregnancy…” She looked down and outlined my abs as she stared absently at them. “That was one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do, and it haunts me every day, but I just…”

  I didn’t reply… I mean, shit, what could I say to that?

  “The problem I faced though was that I was a fourteen-year-old with no money. I mean, how am I supposed to pay for an abortion, right? So I did what I had to do… There was this uh… this guy in the Baltimore neighborhood I grew up in named Jay Rock. He was well known in the street, so I went to see him for a job. He was the only person I could go to. He ran the streets in Edmondson Heights, my neighborhood, and it would be suicide if I went anywhere else.” She chuckled uncomfortably and added, “He took one look at me when I asked for a job and laughed… He said, ‘Nobody gonna pay for you, mama. Go on somewhere.’ I should have done what he told me, but I begged him. He then looked at me, licked his lips and then he did offer me a job… Well, I wasn’t doing that either, so I told him that I could sell for him. I explained since I was a big girl who stayed quiet and to herself, no one would suspect me. I could blend in when I wanted to or be a ghost if I had to. I figured I could do this for him…”

  She chuckled softly and shook her head, “Well, as you can imagine, he wasn’t going for it, but I was so adamant that he gave me a chance. I tell you, when I came back to him with his money and a smile on my face, he hired me right then and there. I was only fourteen years old, and I sold drugs for two months… Man, I was sitting pretty, you know? I thought this was going to be my chance. I was going to make a run for it, leave that awful house that I lived in and take care of myself. I proved I could do it, right?” She shook her head then looked at me and shrugged, “I was making a killing. I hid my money in the backyard over where my family kept their pit bulls. No one bothered those dogs but me. They were mean and vicious, but the only one that could be near them was me, not even my parents could get close. I fed them and walked them, so when I was out in the streets, they were my bodyguards.”

  “The success I was having gave me a plan for myself and Jay Rock helped me. He kept me under his wing, letting everyone know in the neighborhood, ‘Don’t no one fuck with Baby G’. Rumors got around on the street, and I was watched closely by Jay Rock’s rivals, but no one ever stepped up to me. The police didn’t believe I was capable of doing what the rumors said, so they never bothered me either. I still stayed to myself, and I remained quiet. I never flaunted; I had money and never ran my mouth. But I was observant and very careful, and I think that’s what Jay Rock liked about me.”

  She squirmed again in my lap, but I didn’t notice. Instead, I was taking in everything she was saying and even the things she wasn’t saying. I did feel her move off my lap and sit between my legs on the bed, still keeping her legs draped over mine. She started tracing my abs again; eyes on my torso, “There was this one day Jay asked me to come by his headquarters. He usually picks some abandoned apartment building in the neighborhood to house his stash. So I typically was careful when I make my way to him. I took different routes and watched my back to make sure no one was following me. And I did that. I swear no one saw me coming, and I wasn’t followed. So I got there, and he asked if I would run some errands for him. So I did that. I was gone a long time, and when I made it back, he was on a heated call with someone. Jay Rock was always on the phone cussing and yelling, so I didn’t think nothing of it. When he got off the phone, he looked at his crewmember and said, ‘Yo, put Dawg, Spank, and Lateef on alert. Those muthafuckas don’t know who deh fuckin’ with. I don’t think they’d be stupid enough to start some shit, but jus, in case, I wanna be ready.’ He then looked at me and nodded his head, ‘Stay low for a while, Baby G, aight? I’ll call you when the block is cold; you got me?’”

  Her eyes traveled to mine. “I nodded to him and was about to say something when the shit just hit the fan. I mean, one minute, all his boys were just milling around, watching porn on TV, playing video games, counting money and then … Bam! Gunfire just erupted…”

  I could imagine exactly the scene she was describing. I’d hit places like that multiple times, and I also know what the end result of that raid was. I rubbed her thighs to try and soothe her. I knew whatever she saw fucked her up pretty bad. I could see the emotion overcome her and tears gathered in her eyes. They only fell the m
oment she closed her eyes.

  Her voice lowered when she spoke next. It didn’t matter how close we were; I could barely make out what she said. “God, Drake, all that blood… I’ve never seen anything like it. I mean bodies just dropped left and right. Bullets… men screaming in agony, cursing, pleading, begging… I mean, some of them were executed without prejudice. I wasn’t naïve. I knew what Jay Rock and his men were, but it still bothered me, you know? It was awful…When it got quiet, I thought the coast was clear, so I rose up from my hiding place and was met with a gun placed right against my forehead. I’ve never seen so much evil in a man’s eyes. That day, I swear Satan was standing before me. I couldn’t move from the look in his eyes and only blinked when I heard a click from the gun. But still I couldn’t find my legs, so I stayed there as he pulled the trigger over and over again. I saw him bend down and grab another gun lying around. He quickly pulled that trigger too, and nothing happened. He got frustrated and yelled, looking on the floor for another gun to shoot me with, and I finally found the will to move and cut out running. As I ran, I saw a gun just lying there next to one of Jay’s men. So I picked it up and blindly shot it behind me. I didn’t look back. I just kept firing as I got clear…”

  I instinctively touched her face with both my hands and tried to remove the sadness as each tear fell. She opened her eyes and just looked in mine. Seeing the pain in her eyes pissed me off to no end. I was literally figuring out how I would find this motherfucker and rip him to fucking pieces.

  “There were at least sixteen bodies lying in that house from the aftermath… but there was only one that died at the hands of me.”

  “I’m so sorry, baby,” I said softly.

  She started shaking and trembling. I didn’t know what I could do to ease her. I kept caressing her face, rubbing her arms, just trying to soothe her as best as I could.

  “I ran for two blocks before the cops stopped right in front of me. I was covered in blood, and I still had the gun in my hand.” She shook her head and frowned. “I can’t begin to tell you why they didn’t shoot me on sight. I mean, I saw them stop in front of me. I saw them draw their weapons and point them at me, but I just stood there. I didn’t move. I couldn’t. I don’t know if I passed out or what, but the next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital.”

  She fell silent that moment still trembling. I was enraged at this point, and I wanted to ask her about her family, but she said, “The cops didn’t get much out of me because, hell, I didn’t see much. I told them how the men came in and just started shooting. I didn’t know who they were or why they were there. They asked what I was doing there, but I never answered them. They had my prints on the gun, but they also had prints from the owner too. From all the evidence, they gathered, the DA decided not to charge me. When the cops brought me home and told my family what happened, we had an understanding. They stayed away from me, and I stayed away from them.”

  “I was so scared, Drake… I was so afraid that Jay Rock’s people would think I set him up, and they would come after me. I was afraid that the other crew that got killed would come and retaliate on me too. I barely ate; I barely slept… I didn’t have to go through with the…” She paused, and I knew what she meant. She sighed, “Sometimes I just wish I died with everyone else in that place… God… I took a life, Drake, and I can’t seem to shake that fact… I sometimes see his eyes in my sleep, and I think he’s not dead… When you told me about that guy trying to kidnap me… I just know I’m a goner if they get me…”

  “I won’t let that happen, Georgia, I promise you.” I pulled her into me and turned our bodies to where she was lying under me. As I turned her though, she broke. She just cried out in agony and pain, as if this shit just happened to her instead of it being seventeen years ago.

  “Listen to me, what happened that night in that house wasn’t your fault. I know those kinds of people. Jay Rock probably had a long-standing beef with them, and they were probably watching him for a long time. So don’t beat yourself up about that, and don’t you dare fucking feel sorry for the son of a bitch that you shot. Baby, he had no soul, no heart… He was going to kill a fourteen-year-old because you were just there. Believe me, he wouldn’t have lost any sleep, so you need to stop letting it bother you now.”

  “I can’t help it…”

  “I know, baby, but try. Try and think about the good shit you’ve been able to do in your life that justifies you still being here… being alive.”

  She scoffed, “Yeah, like what?”

  “Like, hell, I don’t know… You’ve graduated from college, you’re shaping young minds as a professor, you’ve gotten the rare opportunity to be fucked by me; I mean, take your pick…”

  She started laughing. If I wasn’t secure in myself, I would have taken it personal. I smiled at her, hoping I was getting her back.

  She covered her face from me with her hands, groaning, “Ugh… I don’t know why I told you all of that. I’m sorry.”

  I moved her hands and kissed her cheeks, her forehead, her eyes, and her lips. I caressed her face and said, “Baby, it’s okay. I understand why you’ve shared that story with me, so don’t worry about it. I’m honored. I really am…”

  And I did understand why she told me. The way she’s given herself to me these last few days, I knew she hadn’t done this with anyone else. I could feel that every time I was inside her. She needed to justify doing this, giving herself to me in the way that she has. I can’t be a stranger to her, she can’t be a stranger to me, so she figured if we share something about each other that no one knows about, we’d kind of solidify a relationship that was above any we’d experienced with anyone else. It made our arrangement easier to cope with in her eyes.

  It was my turn to share. I didn’t want to, but as she continued to recuperate in my arms, I had no choice. “Ever since I was born, I’ve been a rebel. It’s hard for me to follow rules that inhibit me to get what I want. I’ve done a lot for the sake of my wants as a kid. I’ve stolen things I wanted, I’ve cheated to get what I want, and I’ve beaten the fuck out of anyone that stood in my way.”

  Her red eyes searched in mine. For what, I didn’t know, but I kept my eyes on hers so she could get what she needed from me. I caressed her face, wiping the wetness and just wanting to touch her, to mend her somehow.

  “My parents, as you could imagine, weren’t thrilled to have me as a son. I’m the youngest, and my siblings reminded me all the time that I was an afterthought as I grew up, so I made sure they regretted having that one more child and sibling.” I chuckled and added, “I wasn’t ever sent to juvie or anything like that. I was smarter than to get caught. I only surrounded myself with smart people, and if they did some dumb shit that could get me caught, well… Let’s just say I cut them out of my life.”

  “I did manage to graduate high school, and I thought about college, just to fuck with my siblings and my parents. But instead I thought of another way to do it. My brother, Daniel Jr., is about six years older than me. My sister, Julia, is four years older than me. They, of course, are very close, and they actually followed in my parents’ footsteps. My father is an Assistant Director of one of the divisions of the FBI. My mother works for NSA and is rubbing elbows with high-ranking officials in the government. So being the ideal children, my siblings decided to follow in my father’s footsteps and joined the Bureau fresh out of college.”

  “So what I did to fuck with my family is join an agency that would piss them off every time they thought about it… I joined the CIA.”

  “You’re a CIA agent?”

  I chuckled at the size of her eyes. “Oh no, not anymore, but for twelve years, yes, I was. The CIA doesn’t recruit kids fresh out of high school, but I ascertained a certain amount of skills growing up that they couldn’t possibly pass up, so at the age of eighteen, I was trusted with the life of spies.”

  “So you’re estranged from your family because you joined the CIA?”

  I sighed and just looked a
t her. This was something that I didn’t want to tell her about. Only Angel and my Uncle knows about my past, and it took me months before I confided in them. I really could make up anything at this point, but I didn’t. Instead, I gave her the exact same honesty she gave me. “Well, they don’t like me for a number of reasons, but for me, it is a lot deeper than that. So…” Georgia sat up a little, placed her back against the backboard and hugged the pillow to her. I laid on my back and put my hands behind my head. I looked up at the ceiling and continued, “I need to explain that I was really good at what I did for the agency. They would call me for most of the sensitive assignments, and I would do whatever I needed to accomplish the goal they wanted. If I didn’t like the job or I felt something was up with the assignment, I wouldn’t do it. I worked alone, so I didn’t have a problem bailing on a job. I mean, the powers to be might not approve, but fuck them… Well, not to go into details, but I was told to capture and bring a very important witness to an undisclosed Embassy. I was specifically told to do a snatch and grab clean. So I went to where the subject was and planned on doing just that. But when I got there, someone beat me to him, and they killed him.”

  I heard her gasp so I looked back at her, “Are you okay with me telling you this?”

  She nodded, and I added, “Baby, I need for you to say the words to me. Are you okay?”

  “Yes, Drake, I’m okay… I’m not shocked that he was killed… I mean, I was, but I was more shocked that someone beat you to it.”

  “Yeah, me too. So I got out of there as quick as I could. Well, the problem was this person was some big hotshot, something that I didn’t know, and someone planted evidence that pointed right at me. I mean, the moment I made it out of the apartment where the body was, the police were already there. I barely got out of the country with my life, then to find out that my own country was selling me out to take the fall for this fucker. My superiors complained about me, had written documentation that I was mentally unstable- shit that they have never told me, and accused me, in writing, for shit I didn’t do. I’ve never seen any formal or informal complaint on me until that moment.”