Christie Kelley

by Every Night Im Yours

  “Best make certain I do not discover who she is or you will be married before you can snap your fingers.”

  “Yes, Mother.”

  She pointed toward the door. “Be off now.”

  Nothing like a good chiding by your own mother to end a perfect day, he thought sarcastically. He glanced down at his watch. Even though it was only eleven, he’d had enough of this day. He slammed the door to his bedroom suite and headed for the brandy.

  He wanted to forget the past month. As if that would ever happen.

  “Avis, are you even listening to me?”

  Avis blinked and returned her concentration on Emory. He sat across from her in the carriage while Bridget sat next to her. While her maid wasn’t the perfect chaperone, Avis hadn’t any other choices. All her friends had begged off, even Sophie.

  “I must apologize, Emory. My mind drifted away from me.”

  He smiled at her. But his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I was telling you all about the prince’s comments.”

  Of course he was. And normally, she would have been listening with great interest to him. Instead, her mind kept wandering off and thinking how much more interesting this carriage ride would be if Banning sat across from her. She clenched and unclenched her fists. She had to stop thinking about him. That part of her life was over.

  Concentrate on Emory, she scolded herself.

  “And then he said it was a most agreeable story,” Emory said.

  Emory was the perfect gentleman. After their time alone in the study last evening, she feared he might have developed an attraction to her. While only a few weeks past, she would have welcomed his attention, now she wanted no part of it.

  “Avis,” Emory exclaimed. “I really don’t believe you are hearing a word I’ve said today.”

  “I am dreadfully sorry, Emory. You have been a perfect companion and yet my mind keeps wandering off.”

  He reached over and clasped her gloved hands. “Whatever is the matter?”

  Avis closed her eyes and squeezed his hands. “I’ve just been worrying about Elizabeth.”

  “It will take time but she will get over her father’s death. At least she has her sisters.”

  “You’re right, of course.”

  Emory was a wonderful man. How could she have believed Banning’s ranting about Emory hurting that prostitute? Not once in all the years she’d known Emory had he behaved poorly toward her or any other woman. But perhaps she should hear his side of the story, if he would tell her of it.

  “Emory,” she paused for a breath of confidence.

  “Yes?”

  No, she couldn’t ask him such a personal question. “Never mind.”

  “Avis, what is on your mind? You can tell me or ask me anything. We’re friends.”

  Yes, he was exactly right. And friends told friends the truth. “I heard a rumor about you and would truly like to hear your side of the story.”

  He released his grip on her hands and sat back. A deep frown marred his face. “What rumor?”

  “Something that happened a few years ago.”

  “It wasn’t as it appeared,” he said quickly. He clenched his jaw and fists as a bead of sweat broke out on his forehead. His eyes widened but he refused to look at her. “I—I never laid a hand on that girl. I have witnesses.”

  Avis smiled at him. “I knew it. With the number of boys at Eton it could have been anyone.”

  “Eton?” Emory released his grip and sank back against the velvet squabs visibly relaxed. “It was nothing but a simple misunderstanding, Avis.”

  “Will you tell me about it?”

  He hesitated a moment too long before he agreed to tell her. “Another young man in my room had snuck in a strumpet. He became irate after she tried to steal more money from him than she’d originally asked for and he struck her forcefully. The misunderstanding happened because James left the room after he saw what he’d done to her, and I walked in right after him. Everyone thought I had hit her. I never could live that story down. To this day there are still people who believe I was the monster who hit her.”

  He stared down at his hands.

  “I’m so sorry, Emory.”

  “Thank you, Avis. I hate talking about what happened that night. It makes me feel as if I am there again, watching the scene unfold in front of me, trying to defend myself against something I had no part in.”

  Avis felt a sense of guilt now for bringing it up. “Thank you, Emory. I’m certain it can’t be easy to relive such a dreadful time.”

  Emory’s explanation seemed perfectly logical to her. Not once had he acted as if he wanted anything more than a pleasant drive through the park. She breathed a sigh of relief that Banning was wrong about him.

  Banning thought about his options again for getting Avis to marry him as he rode through Hyde Park. He’d finally come to the conclusion that he would have to speak with Jennette in a manner that wouldn’t make her suspicious. The last thing he needed was his sister furious with him for having an affair with her best friend.

  “Riding alone today, I see.”

  He blinked and looked over at Somerton’s sardonic smile. Banning had been so engrossed in his thoughts he hadn’t even heard Somerton’s horse approaching.

  “What happened with your lady friend?”

  Anger fired in his belly. “That is none of your concern.”

  Somerton shrugged. “Perhaps not, but I thought it odd that you were riding here alone while she rode with Billingsworth by the Serpentine.”

  “What?” He just barely remembered to keep his voice at a civil tone.

  “The Serpentine, Billingsworth and Miss Copley, riding with just her servant as a companion.” With that, he rode away.

  Banning wasted no time in turning his horse around and galloping toward the water. He pulled up a short distance from the lake and scanned the area. Being a mild day there were many people on both horse and foot. Never having paid attention to Billingsworth’s carriage, Banning had no idea if there were any special markings on the vehicle.

  One open carriage caught his attention or maybe he had noticed the bonnet and remembered it from their drive to Southwold. Either way, his hands twisted on the reins. He wanted to shoot Emory Billingsworth so he couldn’t hurt another woman again. Knowing he was unable to shoot him, the thought of strangling Avis entered his mind. Unable to do that either, he rode off toward her house. He might not be able to shake some sense into her, but he could tell her his opinion on the subject.

  Grantham opened the door and opened his mouth to speak.

  Banning pushed past the older man. “I know she is not at home but I will be waiting for her in the study.”

  “Milord,” Grantham started, but Banning was already down the hall.

  He walked into the study and poured a glass of brandy as Grantham reached the room.

  “Milord, you must realize how…how…indelicate this is. Miss Copley is an unmarried woman and you mustn’t barge into her home in such a brutish manner.”

  “Grantham, go get your strongest footman to forcibly remove me if you must but I will not leave until I see her or you have me thrown out.”

  Grantham’s back stiffened, and then he smiled tightly. “I believe I understand, milord. Would you like refreshments while you wait?”

  Banning held up his snifter of brandy. “This shall do nicely. Thank you, Grantham.”

  He slipped into the leather chair by the unlit fireplace and waited, and waited. The minutes ticked past until one hour had come and gone, the brandy glass refilled twice and she still hadn’t returned. How could she ride with that bastard after what he’d told her about him? Perhaps she liked him a bit more than she had said. Billingsworth had been her first choice as a lover after all. And even though she hadn’t admitted an overwhelming lust for him, she might find him attractive enough.

  Dammit.

  She was supposed to be his betrothed by now. He had to keep her away from Billingsworth. There was no way of do
ing that unless she agreed to be his wife, and the likelihood of marriage lessened every day.

  “I heard I had a visitor,” her voice sounded like a soft breeze from the doorway.

  He looked over at her and glared until she let out a small gasp.

  “Why are you here, Selby?”

  “Shut the door, Avis.”

  She glanced nervously between the door and him. “I don’t think that would be a good idea,” she mumbled.

  Banning gulped down the remains of his brandy and rose. “Not a good idea?” He laughed. “But I suppose riding with that bastard in the park with only a maid for a chaperone was a brilliant idea?”

  “You were spying on me?” She inched backward toward the open doorway.

  “Spying? Just how many people saw you driving with the man today, Avis? You know what they will assume,” his voice grew louder with each sentence. He strode to the doorway, caught her wrist, swung the door closed, and pushed her against the wood. “You know people will talk.”

  “Why do you care?” she whispered.

  He inhaled the intoxicating scent of her jasmine perfume and sighed. “I just do.”

  She turned her head slightly. “I spoke to Emory about what happened at Eton.”

  “Oh? And what lies did the bastard tell you?”

  “Don’t call him that,” she said in a harsh tone. “He told me about the misunderstanding.”

  “Misunderstanding? Is that what he called it?” Banning backed away from her as she recounted the lies Billingsworth had told her. Staring at her amber eyes, he realized she completely believed Billingsworth.

  “That was quite a work of fiction he told you. I was there, Avis. He had no roommate named James.”

  Avis threw up her hands in frustration and took a step backward. Why was this so important to him? “Why does this matter?”

  He moved in closer, trapping her between the door and his hard chest again. “Because the man could hurt you.”

  “He would never do that, Banning. He’s my friend.”

  “A friend doesn’t take money with no means to repay you.”

  “A friend doesn’t ask for repayment,” Avis replied curtly.

  He grabbed her wrists and raised them above her head, pressing his body against hers. “Stay away from him,” he whispered as he bent his head toward her lips.

  Quickly she turned her head the other way to avoid his kiss. His lips landed on her neck as hot need shot through her body with his closeness. He traced the contours of her neck up to her jaw until he reached her lips. Her control slipped as his tongue found hers. Her hands itched to wind their way through his silky hair, to skim her fingers up his chest, but he held her bound to the door so she had no ability to touch him.

  “Avis,” he muttered against her lips. “Marry me.”

  He was wearing her down with just his nearness. She struggled to get out of his arms and put some distance between them, and some sense back into her head. Instead, he pressed his body closer to her.

  “Marry me,” he whispered in her ear. “We can make love every night, even tonight, right here and now.”

  “Oh God,” she mumbled, closing her eyes as his tongue lapped her earlobe. The idea of making love with him had turned her body to mush. If he let her go right now, she’d drop to the floor. She couldn’t make love with him again. No matter how much her body wanted him.

  “No.”

  Banning leaned his forehead against hers, breathing hard. “Avis, this is madness. We both want each other. We love each other. We should marry.”

  Avis closed her eyes to keep the tears at bay. “I just can’t, Banning.”

  “Why?” He barely whispered the word.

  “I cannot marry you or anyone.”

  “Why not? Are you secretly married to someone else?”

  “Of course not.”

  “Then give me one good reason why you can’t marry me,” he whispered against her forehead.

  One good reason. Fear? The idea of marriage, even with Banning, still terrified her. She loved him. But she had her father’s blood running through her veins. She remembered the look in her mother’s eyes when her father had hit her. The memories of her mother’s broken bones and bruises, of her own bruises, would never fade. And Avis was certain of one thing—she would never want a child to go through the hell she had. She couldn’t stand to see Banning’s love turn to loathing when he realized the truth about her.

  “One good reason, Avis,” he said again.

  “I just can’t marry you. I’m sorry.”

  “That was scarcely a good reason.”

  This had to end. He actually mentioned love again. His proposal today was far more serious than any previous one. And she was weakening. Perhaps it would be prudent to stop this insanity now.

  “I don’t want you to call on me again. This foolishness needs to stop.” She twisted out of his arms and finally had the distance she needed to maintain control.

  “This will not stop until you are my wife.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “And I will not stop calling on you.”

  She shook a fist at him. She couldn’t cry. She wouldn’t cry. No matter how she tried, she couldn’t keep the tears from racing down her cheeks. How could she take a chance with him when she knew what was deep inside of her?

  “I am never going to be your wife.”

  “Yes, you will.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  By the time she reached the Kesgrave estate in Suffolk, Avis felt as if she would never eat again. With her nerves in a knot, she’d been unable to sleep during the drive. So her coachman had to stop every hour or two for her to cast up her accounts.

  She stepped down and held her coachman’s arm for a moment to steady her legs. Once she was certain she could manage on her own, she walked toward the old stone house. Leaded glass windows lined the building, giving it an ancient feel. Carved in the wood above the entrance was the date 1593.

  The door opened before she even reached the front step. The butler showed her inside and into the elegant drawing room. Lord Kesgrave and his wife Charlotte smiled at her as she walked toward them.

  “Avis,” Charlotte said. “It’s so lovely to see you again. I am pleased you decided to join us for the week.”

  “Miss Copley.” Lord Kesgrave nodded at her. “Jennette arrived ahead of you but awaits your presence in the billiard room.”

  “Thank you, my lord.” Avis glanced toward Charlotte and noted the softly rounded belly that announced her impending motherhood. “You look very well, Charlotte.”

  “I feel wonderful. I assume you wish to retire to your room to refresh yourself?”

  Avis nodded. Nothing sounded better than a cup of tea and no rocking motion. “Yes, thank you.”

  Charlotte led her into the large hallway where a footman stood in wait. “Show Miss Copley to her room.”

  Turning toward her, Charlotte said, “Since you are a dear friend of Jennette, I put you in a room near the Selbys. I’ll have some tea sent up to you.”

  Avis tried to control the nervous twitch that suddenly attacked her eye. Just how close would she be to him?

  “I would be happy to show you around our home once you have settled in,” Charlotte said.

  “Thank you.”

  Avis followed the footman through the hall to the oversized staircase, glancing at the large portraits of Lord Kesgrave’s ancestors that hung on the wall as she walked. The footman led her down a long hallway with bedrooms on each side.

  Every room had a nametag, Lady Selby’s room, and then Jennette’s room. Thank heavens. For a moment she had been certain his room would be next to hers. The footman opened the door to her room and she stepped inside.

  The bedroom teemed with yellows. The marigold bedspread on the four-poster bed matched the velvet curtains, which lined the windows. Pictures of tulips and daffodils provided a beautiful accent to the landscape painting over the bed. Avis knew with one glance at the picture that Jennette had painted it.r />
  “Ma’am?” a voice called from the hallway.

  “Yes?” Avis opened the door a crack and saw her maid, Bridget. “Please come in.” She held the door open as the maid came in followed by a footman carrying her small trunk.

  As her maid unpacked her clothes, Avis relaxed and sipped her tea. Finally, her stomach settled down. Bridget helped her change into an ivory silk dress with bluebells embroidered on the hemline and then redressed her hair. As Avis collected a few extra pins in case her hair became unruly, her maid unpacked the rest of her gowns.

  “The blue gown for dinner, Bridget.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I will have it brushed out.”

  Avis left the room to find Charlotte for her tour of the house. Her fingers trailed down the polished cherry handrail as she descended and scanned the area for Banning. Uncertain how to proceed after he left in a bit of a temper the other day, she decided it might be necessary to avoid him as best she could.

  As she reached the last step, Charlotte withdrew from the drawing room. “I believe Jennette is looking for you. I shall lead you to her.”

  As they walked along, her hostess rambled on about the estate and its history, but Avis’s mind remained on Banning. At some point she would see him, and then what? The crack of a cue hitting a ball revealed their proximity to the billiard room.

  “Here you are,” Charlotte said. “I must go see to my other guests, but I shall have some refreshments brought in for you both.”

  Avis strolled into the room and stopped. Banning leaned over the table with a long cue in his hand ready to knock a ball. His buff breeches accented his muscular thighs and buttocks. A small sigh escaped her. He turned his head toward her and instantly stood upright.

  “Miss Copley,” he said in an unemotional tone.

  “Lord Selby. I understood your sister was looking for me.”

  “I believe she is.” He placed his hand on his hip and stared at her. “I did not think you would come all this way. With your dislike of traveling, that is.”

  “I promised your sister.”

  “Very well then.” He turned back to the table to take a shot. “Since you have not mentioned it, I trust there were no complications I need to be aware of?”