by Maya Hughes
Things were finally coming together and in a way that Alex wouldn’t have even let herself dream of in her wildest imagination. She was in love with Gabe. Always had been, but she was finally able to admit it to herself. The waiter brought over the chocolate desert, which they decided to eat on the couch inside. She thought snuggling up with him, and some chocolate was the perfect end to the perfect evening.
The waiter and chef departed shortly and they were alone. She tucked her feet under herself as she fed him some of her dessert and they listened to music, relaxing in each other’s arms.
“I love you Alex,” he breathed against her neck as he kissed his way from her ear down to her collar bone. She turned to him, the vulnerability shining in his eyes. She’d been very free with the physical part of their newly rekindled relationship, but wanted him to know that she was just as invested as he was.
She sat up and placed her plate on the coffee table. Turning to him, whose eyes were wide with fear, she gave him a small smile. She took his hands in hers and placed them on her heart.
“I love you too, Gabe. I don’t know that I ever stopped loving you. I don’t think I could, not once I had Emma. She was a part of both of us and sometimes seeing her was hard because she reminded me so much of you and of how much I loved you, even if we weren’t together.”
After her proclamation, he took her hands from her heart and kissed both of her palms. “I think it’s time to go to bed,” he said as he stood and scooped her up, despite her protests to let her walk, and carried her upstairs.
He gently placed her on the bed and began to slowly undress, first working on his tie, then unbuttoning his shirt. Alex, not wanting to wait a moment longer, started working on his shirt from the bottom up until their hands met in the middle. Then she moved back down and undid the buckle on his belt and unzipped his pants. She reached her hand into his boxers and took his shaft in her hands. He sucked in his breath as she began to stroke him.
“You always know how to get me going woman,” he said playfully, as he pushed her back onto the bed and climbed on top of her. “But now it’s my turn.” He pulled back, undid her jeans and pulled them off completely in one motion. He got down on his knees and held her open. Looking up at her with a devious gleam in his eye, he buried her face in her pussy like a man starved. She had to grab one of the pillows and hold it over her face, so that she didn’t wake Emma. He brought her to her peak twice before she had to finally beg him to take her.
“How did you know that’s what I wanted as a reward for our dinner?” A mischievous glint in his eyes as he climbed up the bed and placed himself at her entrance, which was more than wet enough after his ministrations. With Alex being as super sensitive as she was after his previous attentions, it was less than a couple of minutes before they were both bucking against one another and reached their pinnacle together. They were both panting as they basked in the afterglow of another amazing night together.
She rolled over and sighed as she brought the sheet up over her chest and stared over at him. He was a beautiful man; she was lucky to be with him. She loved him and he loved her. She just hoped that it would be enough for them to weather whatever storm was to come.
29
Her phone was buzzing non-stop, and she hoped it wasn’t her alarm already. Usually, she didn’t even get to hear it because Emma woke her up at the crack of dawn, but it seemed Emma was knocked out from their adventures yesterday. Gabe snuggled in behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.
The vibrating began again, and he grumbled to make it stop. She felt around the nightstand until she found it and went to hit the snooze button. But she didn’t find the alarm. Instead, she found about ten missed calls from Jen and more incoming texts to count—texts from Jen, texts from people she hadn’t spoken to in years, and texts from numbers she didn’t even recognize.
Alex unlocked her phone and read through the texts from Jen.
J: Have you seen the news?
J: Have you checked the gossip sites?
J: Ugh, never mind, don’t check. Forget I sent anything.
J: Actually, you probably need to check this out.
J: Call me if you want to talk.
She opened a browser on her phone, typed her name into Google and opened the first link she saw. The headline caught her attention immediately: “Super Stud Gabe Stevens Caught in Paternity Struggle.” It wasn’t the only story, either. “Secret Child Kept Away by Gold Digging Ex.”
“Oh crap,” she gasped as she sat up in bed. Startled, he jumped up. “What happened?” he said as he looked around the room.
“This happened,” she said, shoving the phone in his face. His sleepy expression slowly turned to horror as he began to scroll through the stories.
She pushed out of bed and walked over to her suitcase. She grabbed the first pair of jeans, laying on top of the bag.
“Alex, it’s not so bad; we can fix this.”
“We can fix this?” she growled, keeping her voice down. “How are we going to fix this? I’m the money hungry bitch who kept your kid from you. I should have known better.”
“We can fix this,” he repeated. “We’ve been happy, all of us together; don’t let some tabloids scare you away.”
“You’re not the thieving whore the papers are writing about. You’re the victim here according to them.” She angrily pulled a tank top over her head. “I knew shouldn’t have come. If we had just stayed at home, none of this would have happened.”
He walked over to her and pulled her into his arms. “We couldn’t hide forever. I wasn’t going to hide you both away. I’m proud to be Emma’s father, and I’m proud to be with you. This isn’t how I wanted anyone to find out, but we will fix this.”
“How Gabe? How are you going to fix this? One day Emma will be able to read these things.”
“But she’ll know the truth from us. She’ll know that we love her and we love each other and none of the stuff written there is true,” he said, with such conviction that it stole her breath away.
I’m scared,” she said as tears filled her eyes. She started to grab her bags and pack. As she pulled her suitcase out, the large manila envelope containing the custody agreement fell out. He picked it up and held it in his hand.
Her breath stopped at what he held in his hand. She’d brought the papers, just in case, not really, she’d mainly forgotten they were in the bag, but they were her security blanket when it came to Emma. She hadn’t intended to use them, and he hadn’t seen them, and she didn’t want him to. She attempted to get the envelope from him, but he held onto the envelope as he spoke.
“I know, I know you’re scared. I’m scared too. Not about the stupid tabloids, I couldn’t care less about them. I’m scared that all this is going to pull us apart. We have got to be stronger than all this. I love you,” Alex jerked in his embrace. “I’ve been afraid to say it up until now, but I do. I love you, I’ve always loved you, and I love you, even more, seeing how you raised such an amazing daughter,” he professed.
She nodded and once again attempted to take the papers from his hand. Not realizing what it was, he finally looked down at the envelope with a nice and neat label with his name printed on it.
“What is this?” he asked, opening the envelope, and she watched as her whole world descended into a fiery crash.
Gabe paused and looked down at the envelope that Alex seemed desperate to get back from him. His name was printed on the front and he slowly turned it over to open it.
“Gabe, please,” she pleaded. He ignored her and opened the envelope. Inside was a thick packet of papers with the big ugly words ‘Custody Agreement’ printed on the front. Glancing up from the packet to Alex, her eyes wide, face frozen in fear.
He skimmed the agreement. He was much better at reading these things over after years of contract sessions and not getting caught in a clause he didn’t want to agree to. He’d learned that lesson after Stargazer. However, the various terms in this agreement were so
me of the ugliest he had ever seen.
She wanted to maintain full physical custody of Emma, limited supervised visitation for him, no overnights, no visits to LA, nothing.
“What the hell is this?” He nearly shouted pointing the papers at her. She moved from her bags to stand in front of them.
“They are nothing Gabe. Those don’t mean anything.”
“Then why did you have them drawn up in the first place? Why did you bring them with you?” He made the accusation while crumpling the papers in his hands.
“I’ve had these for a long time. I had the papers drawn up when Emma was only a year old.”
“Why did you bring them here?”
“I don’t know Gabe. I was looking at them before we left and I forgot they were even in my bag,” she pleaded.
“So, this was your solution? Your ugly solution. No visitation? Full physical custody? You wanted to keep her from me?”
“Gabe, that wasn’t what I intended. I had these drawn up a long time ago when I was still hurt and angry. I thought you didn’t want us. That you didn’t want Emma. I didn’t want her to get hurt.”
“No, you did this to try to hurt me. Keeping me away from Emma would never be a good thing for her. This was about you and getting revenge when you thought I cheated.”
“Partially, yes. I admit that, but things have changed now. I would never keep you apart from Emma.”
“Then why keep the papers? Why bring them here? Especially after how things have gone with us since you’ve been here.” Was she only with him because she thought he wanted to take Emma from him? Was this all to protect against a custody dispute?
“I completely forgot about them, Gabe. Honestly, I brought them with me because they have always been like a security blanket when it came to Emma. You’ve been out being a big movie star, making millions of dollars and it was possible you could show up out of the blue and take my little girl from me. I didn’t want to take that chance. So that’s why I had the papers drawn up,” she said, tears in her eyes.
“You thought I would try to take her from you?” he asked shaking his head. “I thought we were doing so well and making a lot of progress in our relationship, but I was fooling myself. I thought that you knew me, Alex.”
“Gabe, it will be okay. I’ll throw away the papers right now. We can work on a different agreement. One that’s fairer,” she said, trying to calm him.
“I don’t want an agreement Alex!” he roared. “I wanted a family. I wanted you and me and Emma to be a family. I don’t want a court order telling me when I can see my little girl. I want to be able to walk down the hallway and give her a hug and a kiss and read her bedtime stories. And I want to be with you. You said you loved me and here you are talking about agreements when it comes to Emma. That makes me wonder if I’ve just been fooling myself all along to think we could move forward.” He slumped down on the bed.
“Gabe, we can have that. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought the papers, and I do love you, but this is all scary for me.”
“You don’t think this is scary for me too? This isn’t just about us. If things go wrong, I lose both of you. That was a chance I was willing to take, but apparently, your stance is scorched earth,” he said, gesturing to the envelope he’d placed on the bed next to him.
“Gabe, please,” Alex started.
“I think you should go, Alex,” he said, looking up at her with all the hurt and anger coursing through him.
“You want me to go?”
“I want you and Emma to go back to the States. With this tabloid story and this,” he said, gesturing to the envelope. “Maybe it’s better that we spend some time apart and figure out what will be best for all of us moving forward.” He got up from the bed and walked past her as he headed to the bedroom door.
“I’ll have someone get in touch with you to give you all the details about heading back to the States. And I would appreciate it if Emma and I could video chat with each other at least once a day. I’ll go talk to her at the play group and have the nanny bring her back as soon as they're finished,” he said.
“I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry Gabe,” she whispered as he passed. A jolt shot straight through his heart. He’d had it all for a short while, and then it had all fallen apart.
“I’m sorry too,” he said as he left the room and walked out the front door.
30
The trip back from Scotland was a blur. Gabe had made all the arrangements just like he said he would. They had their flights booked for the following day, their bags were packed for them.
“Daddy, where’s your bags?” Emma demanded, stomping her foot at the front door. “We’re going to be late! I want to see the planes!”
He crouched down with a watery expression and pulled Emma to him, squeezing her in the tight hug.
“Daddy! Too tight. Go get your bags,” she insisted, pushing back in his hold.
“I’m not coming with you sweetie,” he sighed, squeezing her again.
“Why not?” Now Emma’s gaze was the watery one. She looked to Alex and she stood frozen, unable to explain to her daughter what had happened. Emma squeezed him back with her arms wrapped around his neck. “Daddy, why aren’t you coming?”
“I still have work here, Emma, but I can talk to you on your mom’s phone every night. And you can call me at any time, okay?”
“And once you’re finished working you’ll come back home?”
Gabe’s gaze darted to hers before darting away.
“We’ll see, sweetie. We’ll see.”
Alex wiped a stray tear off her cheek before Emma could say it. The hug from him was enough to quell Emma’s melt down. He kept avoiding her gaze and refused to talk to her. Every time she tried to get him alone to talk to him, he would walk out of the room. With Emma there, it made it harder to try to talk to him and he seemed perfectly fine with that situation. Emma took a nap just before the car was to arrive and she thought she finally had her chance, but he pushed back Emma’s hair and kissed her on her forehead and excused himself before she could speak to him again.
He came back as the car arrived to take them to the airport and she picked Emma up to carry her to the car. He said his goodbyes to Emma again, giving her a big hug and promising that he would talk to her as soon as they landed. The car pulled off and she peered out the back window, watching him as he stood in the middle of the road with his hands thrust into his pockets.
The flight was uneventful, if much more subdued than their trip to Scotland a few weeks earlier. There was a car waiting to take when home when they got to their home airport. Opening the door to their house felt like they were walking into someone else’s house. It was their house, but it felt different now. The cottage had become home while they were in Scotland. Their home with Gabe. All the items she had purchased in Scotland came in a shipment a couple of days later, and he included a few extra items for Emma.
Jen called to check in on her a few times.
“Why did you bring the papers if you didn’t intend to use them?”
“I grabbed them from the office when I was getting ready to leave. I was checking them over in my room and he popped in. I freaked, I didn’t want him to see them so I threw them in my bag and started packing on top of them. I forgot they were even there.”
“Why didn’t you tell him that you never intended to have him sign them?”
“I tried, but he was upset that I had them drawn up in the first place.”
“That’s not fair to you. He has no idea what things were like for you back then,” Jen snapped.
“I can’t say I don’t blame him. I thought I’d put it all behind me. I thought I could let it go, then I found out the truth about Lesley and it made it all so much worse. If I hadn’t been such a coward back then and found out what really happened, we wouldn’t have had to be apart at all.” She threw herself onto the guest room bed, clutching the pillow to her chest. It had been a few weeks, but there was still the faintest hint
of his scent. She’d taken to sleeping in there since they got back.
“Alex, you can’t completely blame yourself. And you can’t completely blame Gabe. A lot of this crap storm is because of that prick Aaron. He’s the one that should be miserable, not you two.”
“Hopefully that little shit will get his at the meeting Gabe’s having in a couple of days with his new talent agency.”
“Gabe’s coming back to LA?”
“Yes, there’s going to be a gap in production for a few weeks. He’s going back in LA for a while and I hope he’ll come by here,” Alex sighed.
“Hang in there Alex. I’ll give you a call in a day or so and check in on you two.”
The pair moped around the house, staying mainly in their pajamas. She didn’t even make pancakes. This was cereal emergency time. Emma missed her daddy and was moaning that she didn’t get to see him in person every day like she’d grown accustomed to. And for her, she missed the companionship, the help with Emma, and most importantly, his love and affection. She’d been mostly numb since their fight in the cottage. She didn’t know which way to turn. Everything she’d done to try to protect herself from heartache and here she was, alone again.
She’d been so wrapped up in not being afraid to be alone that she forgot to be okay with being with someone when things were going right. Her fear of falling in love had put her in the exact place she’d always prepared herself for—being alone. Did she feel like she wasn’t worthy of a loving relationship?
He left the cottage immediately after Alex and Emma left. Rattling around the house all on his own being reminded of them at every turn was not his idea of a good time. He checked into a hotel and spent as much time as he could on set. Trying not to think about them during working hours was much more difficult than he imagined.
Coming home to a house that was buzzing with energy, filled with laughter, and covered in toys was something he hadn’t realized he’d been missing out on all these years. Only a few weeks and now he was lost without them.
