The Scent of Cherry Blossoms: A Romance from the Heart of Amish Country

by Cindy Woodsmall

  “I think that’s only part of it. If I dragged him back here right now … if he ended it with Annie tonight, it wouldn’t solve what’s going on between you two. It’d probably make things worse for a long, long time.”

  “It’s so unfair.”

  “You think what’s happening to Aden is fair?”

  He stared off into the night sky. “Aden’s shut me out. I’m gone a week, and he replaces me with Annie—and what he can be with her.”

  “That’s not really surprising. You’re twenty-two years old. All siblings go through a time of separation as they get older and are ready to go their separate ways, start their own families.”

  Roman rubbed the smooth armrest of the porch swing. “After the accident I … I thought he’d always be here, him and me together.”

  “It was bound to happen sooner or later. I’m holding out for it to happen with a nice Amish girl, but either way he will eventually leave the nest.”

  He looked at his mother with tear-filled eyes. “But what about me?”

  Ellen leaned back and folded her arms. “What about you?”

  “I can’t build a life with any woman,” he choked out.

  “You don’t know that. Not yet, anyway. It takes more time for some people to find a mate. I think you’ll find a girl who sees the best in you—if you don’t ruin the possibility with all your bitterness first.”

  He scoffed. “Like Linda saw the best in me?”

  Pinpricks of angst ran over her skin. He’d been dating a lovely girl before the accident. She’d stayed by his side at the hospital, holding his hand, whispering words of encouragement to him. But when the doctor said his injuries were permanent and he’d never walk again, her visits became more sporadic. Her attitude toward him grew distant. Shortly after he returned home in a wheelchair, she told him she couldn’t see him anymore. Roman hadn’t pursued another girl since.

  “What about the girl at Gideon and Mattie’s wedding?”

  “I only did that to get Aden to spend time with someone besides Annie.” He shrugged. “And maybe I wanted to cause some trouble between them.”

  “Maybe?”

  “Let’s talk about something else, okay?”

  “Well … tell me about that date.”

  “We were having a pretty good time … until she saw how much work Aden exerted putting my wheelchair into the carriage and lifting me onto the seat. Then all she could do was stare at my mangled legs.”

  She longed to promise him that, given time, he’d find a girl, but that might not ever happen, and she wouldn’t lie. “It’s possible that one day you’ll find someone who accepts you unconditionally. Who decides that your spinal cord injury isn’t too much to live with. Someone who sees past the chair and likes you for who you are.”

  He intertwined his fingers, staring at them. “I only know one woman who fits that description.”

  She leaned forward. “That’s a start. Who?”

  His lips tugged upward a bit, as if he was fighting a smile. “Uncle Ernie’s neighbor, Marian Lee.”

  Marian Lee. The name rang a bell. “Is she the one who called here a week or so ago?”

  “That’s her.”

  “Isn’t she the one who wrote you all those letters after the accident?”

  “Ya.” His voice carried a softness she hadn’t heard in a long time.

  “As I recall, you didn’t answer most of them. Have you called her since she called here?”

  “I’m going to bed.” He rolled toward the door and waited. It was his way of saying the subject was closed.

  She stood and opened the screen and solid door for him. “Well, maybe you should write or call her.”

  “I don’t think so, Mamm. We landed in a good place the other night when she called. I’m leaving well enough alone.” He rolled into the house and toward his room.

  “Roman.”

  He stopped and turned back to her.

  She put a hand on each arm of his chair and kissed his cheek. “You have to face your fears, or you’ll paralyze your life. You can become someone who doesn’t resent his brother falling in love. Who doesn’t try to manipulate him for selfish purposes. You can be someone who has the courage to try to be in a relationship or who has the peace to live single. And probably without Aden at some point. But to become that man, it’ll take reaching for the unfathomable strength of the One who created you.”

  He headed for his room. “You want me to draw strength from a God who left me like this?”

  “Do you need any help?” she asked, knowing she wasn’t up to the task of aiding him with much.

  “No, but thanks.” With his back to her, he waved his hand. “If anything gets too hard, I’ll just pray about it and wait for an answer.”

  Weary of battles, Ellen waited outside her son’s room until the silence told her he’d gotten into bed. She went out back, watching for Aden to return. Leaning against a huge oak tree, she prayed for wisdom and soaked in the sounds and scents of spring. The smell of freshly plowed earth. The low-pitched, slow call of the chuck-will’s-widow. But she couldn’t fully enjoy any of them. Not with such tension between her boys.

  Finally she saw Aden walking through the back field. Gathering her robe and her courage, she went across the lawn to meet him.

  When he spotted her, he stopped in his tracks for a moment. The pain and confusion she saw in him ran as deep as what she’d seen in Roman.

  He lowered his head. “What am I g-going to do?”

  Ellen wished she knew. Wished there was an easy answer. All she wanted was for her sons to be happy. “Sometimes temporary happiness results in long-term misery. We’re all tempted to go our own way at times, Aden.”

  “It’s not l-like that.”

  “How can you be so sure?”

  “How d-did you know you’d love every child you c-conceived before you ever held us in your arms?”

  “That’s different.”

  “Answer m-me.”

  She ran her fingertips from her forehead back to her ponytail, suddenly aware that her hair wasn’t pinned up properly and she didn’t have on her prayer Kapp. “I just knew.”

  “Ya, m-me too.”

  They walked back to the house together and sat on the back steps.

  “Son, if you continue on this path, there’s heartache in that too. So whether you keep seeing Annie or not, there’s going to be a lot of pain. You need to choose whether to suffer the anguish of ending things with her now or to experience all the grief a relationship with her would cause for yourself, her, and everyone in both families for years to come.”

  They sat there for several long minutes without saying a word. Ellen hoped that God would speak to her son’s heart beyond anything she could say to him.

  “I know you can’t see it right now”—she weighed her words carefully as she watched clouds move across the sky—“but there are other girls out there for you.”

  Aden stood. “Good night, Mamm.”

  He went inside, leaving her to face her hypocrisy. She didn’t want him to find someone else for his own good, but for hers. And her family’s. And Moses’s.

  Annie strolled through the orchard, the cherry blossoms now in full bloom. Normally the sight and the smell overwhelmed her with delight. But not tonight.

  She’d been thrilled at the opportunity to share this special experience with Aden. He’d met her here every night for a week, watching the tiny buds grow, then begin to open, then pop out wide as the abundant blossoms took over every tree.

  While they walked, they talked about everything from their favorite pastimes to remarkable meals and recipes. They discussed recent articles in the newspaper, including what would happen at the diner once the closest plaza on the turnpike shut down. They shared what they believed. They connected so easily, like gliding on ice, only more breathtaking. Occasionally he sang his thoughts to her, but more and more he’d been communicating without a tune or a stutter. Every night her heart soared a little higher.
>
  And Daadi hadn’t a clue about her late-night walks.

  On Sunday they’d allowed their conversations to touch on the future. He asked her again if she’d decided whether she could go through all it’d take for them to be together. She shook her head and changed the subject, turning from the future to focus on the now—concrete things like weddings they’d attended and the price the newly married couples were paying for houses.

  Then on Monday night Aden hadn’t shown. She waited as long as she could before returning home. He hadn’t come on Tuesday either. Or last night.

  Annie yanked a twig of cherry blossoms off the nearest tree. Roman—he was most likely behind Aden’s absence the last few nights. Though Aden claimed he didn’t care what his brother thought, she knew that wasn’t true. Even without their unique circumstances, as twins, Aden and Roman would always have a tight bond.

  As she breathed in the cherry blossom aroma, she realized that the deepest part of her never believed she and Aden had a real chance.

  But she wasn’t ready to give up on them. Was he? Was that why he wasn’t here?

  Tears slid down her cheeks, and she broke into sobs.

  Finally accepting that Aden wasn’t coming again tonight, Annie shuffled back toward the house. She had to figure a way to see him. If he’d given up on them, he needed to look her in the eyes and say so.

  Annie’s insides trembled as she neared Zook’s Diner. As soon as Daadi had returned to the field after lunch, she’d headed this way. Her chores were done, and she’d be back before he returned home for the evening meal. But the distance from Daadi’s to here had never seemed so vast. At the same time, two miles weren’t very far to travel to face one’s future.

  That’s what she was doing, wasn’t it—coming to discover if Aden cared enough to keep seeing her?

  At fifteen she’d known that if she and Aden ever tried to cross the forbidden lines, the pressure that loved ones would put on them to end the relationship would be powerful. And that was just the first step. If she and Aden ignored their families, the church and the community would be informed, and even more pressure would be applied—a lot more.

  She’d spent years consoling herself that staying in their own faith communities was the right thing for her and Aden to do. But she couldn’t believe that lie any longer. She’d fallen in love. She might have doubted what she wanted from Aden before arriving in Apple Ridge three weeks ago, but she’d never be able to deny it again.

  Maybe she was a fool to hope he could ever love her enough to go against what his family and church demanded of him. She walked around to the back entrance and went straight into the kitchen. Aden stood at the stove, flipping hamburgers and bacon. The aromas made her stomach growl, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten since last night’s supper.

  He tossed a patty onto a toasted bun, added lettuce, tomato, and a strip of bacon, squirted condiments, and slapped the other half of the bun on top. When he turned to pull a wire basket full of french fries out of the deep fryer, he caught sight of Annie. He froze, his hand inches from the handle.

  “I need you to tell me what’s going on, Aden.”

  He pulled the fries from the grease and dumped them into the stainless steel container. After salting them, he put some on the plate beside the burger—a couple of them missed and fell to the floor. Without bothering to pick them up, Aden put the plate on the pass-through and tapped the bell.

  Leaving an unfilled order slip on the counter, Aden turned off the stove and ushered Annie to a back corner of the kitchen, out of sight of the pass-through.

  “It’s not a g-good idea for you to be here,” he whispered.

  “I couldn’t let you disappear on me like that. Do you know how it feels to be alone and waiting for someone who doesn’t show up? It’s miserable.”

  “I d-don’t want you to f-feel that way. But sneaking around … it’s wrong. We b-both know it. And you n-never even want to t-talk about what it will take to be together.”

  As much as she wanted to deny what he’d said, she knew it was true. “I can’t bear to think of hurting our families or of what Daadi will do to your business. I just want to be together, Aden.”

  “M-me too. B-but that’s n-not enough, is it?”

  “Aden?” Roman’s voice filtered through the kitchen. “Aden, where are you?”

  He left Annie and walked up to his brother.

  “Moses is here. Says he needs to talk to you.”

  Annie’s heart pounded with fear. She didn’t want to be yelled at in front of a diner full of people.

  Aden pulled the white apron over his head, tossed it onto a counter, and strode out of the kitchen into the seating area.

  Annie tried to think of the best thing to do. Should she go out the back way so her grandfather wouldn’t see her? She couldn’t possibly make it home before he did. Eventually he would ask where she’d been, and she’d have to tell him the truth. The minutes ticked by, and her head ached from the rush of blood pounding in her ears.

  “M-Moses, wait,” she heard Aden call.

  The kitchen door flung open, and Daadi’s frame filled the doorway. “You need to go home. Now.”

  Aden moved between Annie and Moses, as if unsure what her grandfather would do next.

  “Yes, Daadi.” Though she longed for another glance at Aden, she didn’t dare as she went toward the back door. It was all she could do not to throw herself into Aden’s arms as she neared him.

  “I don’t mean my home,” Moses informed her. “I mean yours.”

  “What?” She stopped short, struggling for air.

  “I’ve already hired a driver. He’s waiting out front to take you back to the farm. As soon as you’ve packed your things, he’ll drive you home.”

  “But, Daadi—”

  He gestured toward the door. “Now, Annie.”

  She hesitated.

  “Do I need to remind you that this place has electricity because I remain a business partner?”

  His threat worked its way through her, leaving her dizzy and weak. Her knees gave way, but before she collapsed onto the floor, strong arms caught her and kept her on her feet. She looked up at Aden, whose misty eyes told her he hated what was happening, but he had no solutions.

  She longed for him to promise he’d wait for her, like her Daadi had waited for her grandmother Esther. Annie didn’t expect Aden to buy fields and plant cherry trees on them. But he could at least tell her he’d write while they were apart, to keep their relationship alive until years from now when her Daadi’s heart softened and he wasn’t so set against them.

  Aden helped her stand, but he didn’t utter a single word. Moses waited, and she was grateful he didn’t jerk Aden away from her.

  Her head spun. “Aden?”

  He backed away from her, and her heart shattered. When a horn tooted, she ran out the back door of the diner, grateful for a vehicle that would get her away from here.

  Aden sat on one of the many benches set up in his own home for the Easter Sunday service. The bishop held out his hands. “Let’s pray.”

  The gentle noise of two hundred people quietly shifting from their seats to a kneeling position reminded him of his many years of living Old Order Amish. He prayed for Annie, asking that at least she would find happiness. But he physically ached from missing her.

  When the prayer time was over, everyone stood for the reading of Scripture. He tried to listen, but he kept asking God the same question over and over—if he or Annie left their church after taking a vow, would He forgive them?

  The bishop closed the Bible, and everyone took a seat. A visiting preacher stood and began singing “Neither Do I Condemn Thee.” It was a favorite Easter song that wasn’t in the Ausbund. He, along with everyone else, had learned it in English while attending school.

  With no condemnation but only freedom to experience …

  He’d sung it many times, but this time the words washed over him as he sang.

  We can grow in our spiritu
al life and be strong …

  Aden poured out his heart in prayer while singing the words, and suddenly, like sunrise after a winter’s night, he knew that he had no sinful motive for leaving his people and that God would not condemn him for it. Powerful thoughts about loyalty and faithfulness ran through him, but, oddly, every single one seemed to point to the fact that he had the freedom in Christ, if not among his own people, to be forgiven for breaking his word and to pursue Annie.

  One brick wall that separated him from Annie crumbled to the ground. But only one. He probably faced half a dozen more.

  This morning, as dawn was breaking, he’d gone for a walk, meandering on and on until he found himself in Moses’s orchard. The cherry blossoms, which had just begun to bloom when he saw them last, were already starting to fade and fall off the trees. He’d missed the brief window of time during which he could have enjoyed their full effect.

  Had he also missed his chance to win Annie’s heart?

  It was getting dark when Roman finally got away from the church crowd and went toward his bedroom. He grumbled to himself about Aden disappearing right after the church meal and leaving him to help Mary hide eggs all afternoon. He’d been tempted to hide the lot of them in a pile of fresh dung.

  Because it was Easter, his mother had made a few special items for the after-service meal—pickled red beets with dozens of boiled eggs added. The eggs were a pink color, and people seemed so pleased at their beauty and taste. Later that afternoon the older children and some adults hid Easter eggs for the younger ones to find. The Amish didn’t include the Easter bunny, but most allowed for egg hunts and chocolate candy. Thankfully, the excitement over eating pink pickled eggs and hiding decorated eggs was over for the year.

  Once in his room, he saw no sign of Aden.

  Good. Finally he had a few minutes alone to see what his brother had been up to. Whenever he had a free second, Aden had a pad of paper out. And lately he hadn’t been willing to show Roman anything, which only made him more curious. What was Aden doing that he didn’t want even his own brother to see?