by Barbara Lohr
“Oh, no. I really have to go.” She slid from the stool, leaving her half-full glass of wine. If she drank it, she might do something she’d regret. She didn't want to push him, not tonight.
No way was she falling off the wagon again, only to have nothing resolved.
“Sure you won’t stay?” He looked alarmed. And nervous.
“No really, I’m, ah, meeting a friend at the Comeback Inn tonight.” Tonight distance would be better. She needed to think.
“Oh, okay.” The coziness melted from the room.
Seth was scowling when she said good night.
“What can I bring Easter to help?”
“Anything, I guess.” He scrubbed one hand through his hair, leaving it upended. Her fingers prickled.
“Thought I might take care of the goodies for the kids.”
“Goodies?” Such a guy. He looked totally perplexed.
“You know, pequeñas cosas.” Her hands fluttered in the air and a smile tilted his lips. “Things your mother always has. Plastic bunnies, that kind of stuff.”
“Right. Sure, that’ll be great.”
Helping her into her jacket, Seth let his hands rest on her shoulders. She felt his heat behind her. It would be so easy to spoon her body into his. Would he wrap his strong arms around her? But his body stiffened. Seth pushed away from her like a boat leaving the pier.
“Night, Selena. Thanks for stopping by.”
The key to his house was in her purse. She’d meant to return it. Now she had a totally different plan for that key. Smiling, she slung the purse over her shoulder and left.
Chapter 14
Seth stood on his deck, surveying his back yard. Easter morning and things were looking pretty good. Only he didn’t feel good. Not since Selena’s visit. Sitting across from her, he’d wanted to say so much. But the words wouldn’t come. Not the right words, anyway. Besides, she was on her way to meet Gary. Maybe that’s the kind of guy she needed. Gary was never at a loss for words.
With a sigh, he pushed away from the handrail. Overhead, the oak trees were thick with red buds. One good rain and they’d bloom. About time. Clouds hung gray and heavy overhead and he hoped they held off until after the egg hunt. All the colored eggs McKenna had dropped off were hidden. He’d waited until morning to do that so the raccoons wouldn’t find them first. A stack of yellow and green plastic buckets sat on the deck. Only five kids but the game would keep them busy for what, thirty minutes? He’d come home one day to find a huge bag of stuff tucked into the back storm door. Selena must have stopped and he felt sorry he’d missed her. But he got to work. Blew up the bunnies and scattered the paper decorations around this morning.
The big surprise came when two boxes arrived from Macys. The red dishes packed inside made him smile. Was this a peace omen from Selena? Arranging the dishes neatly in his dishwasher, Seth knew it wasn’t going to be this easy. Selena was a complicated woman. He wouldn’t have her any other way.
But right now, he didn’t have her.
And Easter was his one chance to get her back.
His shoulders ached from all the yard work this past week. Gave him less time to think about Selena and how bad he’d wanted her the night she stopped over. Just to feel her in his arms. Bury his nose in her thick hair. Feel her lips. Oh yeah, those lips. But what would he say? Her visit caught him by surprise so he had no time to think. No time to pull together the words that could win her back.
And she was meeting Gary. This felt like the chess game he could never master. He couldn’t risk one more wrong move.
Sure, he’d taken her up on her offer to help on Easter. McKenna had mentioned that half the colored eggs were from Selena. But Seth wanted a lot more than a bunch of Easter eggs. Hands on the railing, he leaned forward and tried to convince himself that some of her was better than nothing.
That just didn't fly.
Truth was, he wasn’t himself right now. Reenie’s diagnosis had hit him hard and he couldn’t shake it. The memory of that woman who didn’t make it to the hospital in time haunted him. He’d never forget the look on her husband’s face—like he’d lost everything.
Lately, he’d been stopping at his parents’ house for dinner, bringing supper so his dad wouldn’t try to cook. The only thing Big Mike could whip up was potato pancakes. He used way too much oil and nearly burned the house down one time. So Seth picked up chicken, burgers or pizza and took it to their house. “Go on, now,” his mother told him after his third cup of coffee last Wednesday night. “All this carryout must be costing you a fortune. Don’t you have a lot to do for Easter? I feel so bad that we couldn’t have it here.”
His dad shut that down fast. “Now, Reenie, it’s time to let someone else do something for a change. You can hardly raise your arm, sweetheart.” That was the truth. His mother was still recuperating from her surgery and his dad treated her as if she were made of glass.
It reminded him of a dream he’d had the other night. He was down on Navy Pier with Selena when a storm kicked up. All of a sudden she was swept away by high wind and waves. He’d jumped in but couldn’t find her. Instead he sank down, down into the icy waters until he could not breathe. Until he was cold and floating.
The dream had been hard to shake off. He had plenty of good memories of Navy Pier with Selena, which made the nightmare strange. For her last birthday, they’d gone on one of the cruises around the harbor. The sky had been all stars and moonlight that night and Selena had whispered that it was the most romantic night ever.
The kind of night when a man proposes. But he hadn’t proposed. In fact, it hadn’t even occurred to him until his friend Brian brought it up. “Man, you popped for that cruise? That’s where I proposed to Steffie. Time for the ball and chain, huh?”
Seth had just stared at his high school friend. Brian married Steffie and now they were expecting. He wanted to ask Brian what he’d said, how he’d proposed. But his friend would have a field day with that question.
Time to shake off his messed up life. Sure, he wished the sun would come out but that didn’t seem likely. No leaves on the trees yet, but tulips were poking up in the back yard, replacing the crocus. He didn’t go on duty until late tonight and if he were called out earlier, fine with him. The Kirkpatricks were used to men working odd hours. They’d just carry on.
Going back inside, he poured himself another cup of coffee. Shadow appeared from somewhere, sweeping her gray tail around Seth’s ankles. “What do you want now, you little beggar? You’ve already had your breakfast.” Cuddling her in his arms, he took her with him on a final check of the house. It felt good to have her softness in his arms.
The cat had taken to sleeping with Seth. He’d fixed a bed for her down in the kitchen but she wouldn’t stay there. Too cold or too far away? She’d leap onto his bed after all the lights were out and cozy up next to him. Seth didn’t have the heart to turn her out.
Setting Shadow on the black sofa, he reached for one of the huge pillows Selena had brought over months ago. Using both hands, he tried to plump it up the way she did. “Add some color to the place, mi amor,” she’d told him. The red and purple pattern was so Selena. She knew how to brighten things up.
Something silky and purple caught his eye. Reaching down, he pulled out a pair of purple panties. His mind froze. He knew who they belonged to but how had they gotten here? He'd vacuumed this sofa the weekend before, just to get a jump on Easter. Shadow batted at the silky piece. “These are definitely not for you. You're too young.” He stuffed them in his pocket. Time to go on a hunt. After all, the family was coming.
In the kitchen, he found a recipe for Selena's Mexican Chili, tucked in the top drawer of the desk. His pulse speeded. The dining room was next and he tore open drawers of the credenza Selena had found at a resale shop. Speared by a fondue fork were ticket stubs from a movie they'd seen together. “Such a sentimental girl, Shadow.” The cat followed him from room to room.
Nothing was as personal as the first discov
ery but everything socked him right in the solar plexus. Why hadn't he noticed her purple toothbrush tucked in the drawer of the bathroom upstairs? Or her extra robe hanging in the back of his closet? He'd been walking about in a fog while Selena played this joke on him.
She was waving the green light. Maybe she wasn't so serious about Gary after all.
Forty minutes later, he was pretty sure that he had found everything. His heart thudded in his chest as he looked around. The house had become his project after he bought it three years earlier. He was proud of it and wanted it to look nice. After all, first time he’d had a holiday here. Nascar races and Bears games? Sure, but never a holiday. The place looked good. After everyone got here, it wouldn’t make much difference. Fifteen minutes and the coffee table would have peanut shells on it and one of the kids would have spilled a soda on the carpet.
McKenna had stopped by earlier with two egg casseroles, along with directions. Amanda dropped off packages of hash browns and a huge bag of bagels. “I will be here to toast these and I’m bringing cinnamon butter. Don’t worry about the sausage. I’m bringing it with me, already cooked.”
Checking McKenna’s directions, he turned the oven on and went to shower. As he soaped his body under the hot water, he knew Selena would show up. She wouldn't go to all this trouble for nothing.
Freshly showered and shaved, Seth grabbed some notes he'd made when he was clear-headed two nights ago. Folding the paper carefully, he tucked it in his pocket and headed downstairs. He was shaking the tomato juice for Bloody Marys when he heard people at the door.
“Happy Easter, Uncle Seth!” James and Randy, Mark’s boys, raced into the kitchen, followed closely by their dad and his wife, Jamie.
“Happy Easter to you, too.”
“Where’s Shadow, Uncle Seth?” Randy asked.
“In the family room, last I checked. Just hold out your hand and wait for her to come to you. Don’t grab or you’ll scare her.” Elbowing each other, the two boys disappeared.
“I’ll just set this veggie tray on the buffet, Seth.” Jamie swept past with a huge foil-covered tray.
“When’s the Easter egg hunt?” Randy dashed back to ask, Shadow not looking too happy in his arms.
“As soon as everyone gets here. How about that?”
“Oh, boy! I’ll beat you to the swings,” Randy told his younger brother James, handing Shadow to Seth. The two boys scrambled to the back door.
“Trying to get a jump on the egg hunt,” Mark told Seth in an undertone.
“No searching until I say so,” he called after them.
“They’re ruffians,” he whispered to Shadow. She gave him a slow blink of her blue eyes, as if she agreed.
No such thing as arriving late with the Kirkpatrick family. Before long they were all present and accounted for, with his mother set up in the barcalounger in front of the TV, his dad fussing around her.
Watching his father bring his mom a mug of chicory coffee, Seth wondered.
“You sure Mom’s okay?” he asked McKenna, who was unmolding her popular strawberry jello in the kitchen.
“Oh course she is.”
Logan came by and kissed McKenna on the neck.
“That tickles!” McKenna giggled. “You’ll make me drop the jello mold.”
“How about this.” Bending his head deeper, Logan aimed lower.
Too much PDA for Seth. “Okay none of that. You two are getting married soon. Can’t you wait?”
“No. As a matter of fact, I can’t.” Logan gave Seth a sly smile. “Besides, I can’t do this around the hospital.”
“Lord, I hope not.” When the two of them got mushy, Seth hardly knew what to do. “I think Mom’s calling me.”
Logan dropped the smile. “Your mother’s going to be fine, Seth. You know that, right?”
“Of course I do.” Did Logan think Seth couldn’t handle it? He filled another mug with coffee and carried it into the family room where Reenie was holding court.
When he reached his mother, three mugs were arranged on the TV table next to her. “Mercy me, honey. Do I look like a woman who could drink all this?” Mark, Malcolm and Connor had all gotten there before him. In the background, his dad hovered. Was he even watching the golf tournament on TV? His mom grabbed Seth’s hand.
“Sure smells good in here, son. Maybe you should take over having this event for me.”
Seth jerked and his coffee slopped over onto the gray carpet. “No way. Next year? You’re back on.”
“Maybe I like having my kids fuss about me.” His mother nodded her head in Big Mike’s direction. “Your father can certainly do without dish duty.”
But Seth wanted things the way they’d always been. The day felt like a shirt that had grown scratchy. Where the heck was Selena? He checked his phone, feeling relieved when there were no texts from her. Every time the front door opened, he was in the hallway in seconds. But no Selena.
If it weren't for his latest discoveries, he would have been really bummed. The back door slammed open and a tiny hand tugged at his khaki pants. “Uncle Seth, when are we gonna have the Easter egg hunt?”
Seth smiled down at Darby, Malcolm’s youngest. He’d been given a liberal dose of his dad’s red hair and freckles. “How about right now?”
The word spread like wildfire. Kids started screaming and McKenna joined the mayhem, handing out the buckets. Standing on his back deck, Seth counted to ten and yelled, “Go!” The five kids scattered and Seth was glad to see that Lisa, his only niece, was holding her own. While the boys spent most of their time shoving each other out of the way, she quietly plotted her course. With all the confusion, Seth almost didn’t notice the nudge at his elbow. But there was no mistaking Selena’s scent. He turned.
Had Selena’s smile always been this beautiful?
“Hey, babe.” So automatic. For a second her eyes softened. A kiss would have come naturally too. But he hesitated. Where was Gary with all this?
Selena’s eyes dimmed although the smile stayed put. “Happy Easter, Seth. I left my carrot cake in the kitchen.”
“You didn’t have to do that. You dropped off all that other stuff.” One glance at her in that fluffy blue sweater and he couldn’t recall exactly what she’d brought. The words escaped him. Her sweater hugged curves that would have made a roller coaster jealous. And her smile softened, like she knew it. “Thanks for coming.”
“Told you I’d be here.” A pretty pink flush added more color to her cheeks. He felt his family’s eyes on them, especially McKenna’s. The urge to push Selena’s turtleneck aside and settle his lips on her warm neck made him crazy.
Somewhere along the way, he’d lost that right but he was taking it back, and soon.
Nipping her full lower lip, Selena swung her gaze out over the yard. “Looks like you’ve got a serious egg hunt going on here.”
“Yep.” He grabbed the railing to keep his hands busy.
Kids screamed while his brothers and their wives clapped.
“Come on, Lisa! Andale!” Selena hollered. “Don’t let those boys win!” She pounded her fists on the railing like she was driving nails, the strikes reverberating up his arms. He’d always loved her competitive side, loved how she rooted for the underdog.
“Sometimes the boys win, Selena.”
Fire sparked in her dark eyes. “Not if I can help it.”
“Any double meaning here?”
“Take it however you like.” She started backing away while frustration had a heyday in his chest. “Think I’ll go talk to your mom.”
The back storm door closed behind her just as all hell broke loose below. Pretty little Lisa had more eggs in her yellow basket than all the boys put together. That made them all chuckle, while the fathers tried to calm the boys down.
Just then McKenna clapped her hands. “Time to get this meal on the table.” The women made a rush for the kitchen. Seemed that brunch was late and stomachs were rumbling. Seth was new to this host stuff and hadn’t even been wat
ching the time. He'd been too busy watching for Selena. McKenna started frying the hash browns while Amanda heated the sausage.
Relieved that they’d taken over, Seth turned back to the family room. He'd like to get Selena alone but for now he settled for studying her from the kitchen doorway. She perched on his mom’s chair. Shadow was curled up in his mother’s lap and the women seemed to be having a serious talk, making him uneasy.
“Good to see Selena here,” Connor had joined him, Sean in his arms.
“Yeah. I guess.”
“What’s the deal with you two?”
“Wish I knew.”
Seth smiled to see Sean trying to shove his own fingers into Connor’s mouth. “What’s your best guess?” his older brother asked.
The frustration of the last couple months knotted in his chest. “Just not doing something right, bro. Not doing the right stuff, not saying the right stuff. Guess I’m just a hot mess.” Killed him to admit this, especially to Connor.
“You always were a late bloomer.”
“Yeah. Right.”
Connor’s eyes followed his wife as she fooled with the serving table. “Once I got to know Amanda, I couldn’t picture my life without her. That simple. Made me sick to even think about it. Like a puzzle piece that clicked in place, his brother’s words fitted Seth’s feelings. “You’re right. Absolutely right. And Amanda? How did she know?”
Connor grinned. “I told her, egghead. I just told her.”
But the words. What words did he use?
Seth was too embarrassed to ask. He almost whipped out the scrap of paper. But he was going to handle it himself.
“Connor!” Amanda waved him over. “Can you help me with this table?”
Appearing out of nowhere, Selena held out her arms. “Here, I’ll take the baby.”
With a smart-ass smile in Seth’s direction, Connor handed over the baby and went to help his wife. Selena looked so natural cuddling Sean. He began to play with Selena’s curls, his tiny fingers quickly tangled in them.
“Ah, bambino. Qué haces, eh?” Selena crooned. Extracting the baby's hand from her hair, she gave it a kiss. Smiling, Sean gurgled up at her.
