Irresistible Refrain t-1

by Michelle Mankin

  I watched a mother and a teenage daughter both do a double take when they passed him. Bryan Jackson was every woman’s bad boy fantasy: tall, long legs, tight body, tatted arms, and handsome as sin. And what they saw on the outside was just a small part of all the good that was him.

  The elevator door opened. I paused before getting in. I was so tempted to go run to him, who the hell wouldn’t be after what he’s just said. I had to stop doing this though. I’d made my decision, but I really wondered if it’d been the right one. A father and a son hurried onto the elevator. “What number do you need?” the man asked me.

  “Twelve,” I mumbled before moving to the back. I shook my head as if that was all it would take to clear away the confusion. After the door closed, I began to fret. What if he did go back to the blonde? I started to shake. I felt kind of woozy like I had a fever. I rubbed my chilled arms, forcing my thoughts back to the upcoming meeting with Black Cat’s CEO.

  When Mickey Mouse’s recorded voice announced my floor, I plodded out of the elevator and trudged down the hall to Timmons’ room. Outside the door, a woman with grey green eyes almost as beautiful as Bryan’s smiled pleasantly at me. She had a cell pressed to her ear.

  “Just a second,” she told the caller. Balancing the phone between her cheek and shoulder, she held out her hand to me. “Beth Tate. I’m head of PR for Black Cat.”

  I nodded and shook her hand.

  “She shouldn’t be long,” Beth informed me after ending her call. Sure enough the door popped open. Charles Morris came storming out, straightening his tie and buttoning his suit jacket. Beth slid past the Zenith exec on her way into the room. He had pink lipstick smeared on the side of his mouth. When he looked at me I pointed it out, trying to hide my surprise.

  This was interesting.

  Rubbing the color off with his thumb, Charles cleared his throat and ran a hand through his close cropped hair. “Whatever she offers you, I’ll double.” His voice was gruff.

  I didn’t know what to say, but I got the distinct impression that I was caught in the middle of something more than just a competition for my services.

  “You still have my card?” he asked as the door cracked open again.

  “Charles,” Beth queried with a frown. “Are you still here?”

  “Tell her this isn’t over.” He glanced over Beth’s head. “I’ll see her in Miami.”

  “I don’t think…” Beth trailed off as he walked away with a dismissive wave over his shoulder. Her lips flattened, but her expression was neutral when she turned back to me. She opened the door more widely. “Come in. She’ll see you now.”

  The huge suite dwarfed the standard hotel room War and I shared. It was huge with a large sitting area in front of floor to ceiling windows featuring a gorgeous view of the Bay Lake. Mary sat on the middle of a beige sofa with her spine straight and her shoulders back.

  “Have a seat.” She gestured to the orange egg chair beside her.

  As she shuffled through a stack of papers on the oval coffee table, I was surprised to see her hands were shaking. An aftereffect of her encounter with Charles Morris? No doubt the man was a force to be reckoned with. But I got the distinct impression that Mary Timmons usually got what she wanted.

  She smoothed her short brown hair into place and I heard the door clicked closed behind Beth. All business now, the exec leveled me with a serious stare. “I want to let you know up front Black Cat is interested in signing you.” She tapped a finger against the manila file. “But there are a couple of things that came up on your background check that concerned me.”

  “Oh?” I raised a brow.

  “After graduation, you moved in with a man named Martin Skellin. Is that correct?”

  I nodded.

  “The man was a convicted drug dealer.” Mary tossed the file on the table. “I don’t know if you were aware, but he was murdered last week. Shot in the back of the head, execution style.”

  I inhaled sharply. I hadn’t known, but I wasn’t surprised. Martin had been skating on thin ice with the higher ups long before I’d left him. I gave the news of his death about ten seconds of my time, less than two of those feeling bad about it. “That’s awful, but I don’t know how that’s relevant to me.”

  “People are often measured by the company they keep.”

  “Guilt by association. Great.” My hands balled into fists. “Look, Martin Skellin was an asshole. He knocked me around. I left him when he tried to pimp me out to pay off some debt. My time with him is not something I’m proud of, but who he was or what he did, have nothing to do with me.”

  “I understand you’re engaged to Warren now?” She glanced at my left hand. “Isn’t that a little sudden?”

  I shifted, uncomfortable under this cross examination. I felt a fine sheen of perspiration break out on my upper lip. “Not really. War and I have known each other for years. Why all this interest in my love life?”

  I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I was beginning to feel really uneasy. I wished now I had taken War up on his offer to come with me. He’d warned me Mary was a hard ass. He had been way underselling it.

  “It takes a strong personality to go solo. I need to be sure you’ve got what it takes to handle it. There will be no boyfriends or fiancées to hold your hand.

  “I realize that.” I straightened. “I can take care of myself. I have been for a long time now.”

  “Yes. I know all about your childhood. I can’t even imagine what it must have been like for you.” Mary’s eyes softened. She stood and pulled the bottom hem of her suit jacket down. “I can certainly sympathize, and I admire your resilience, Lace, really, I do. But I have my concerns.” She moved to the windows. “You’re untrained. You’re young, and you’re inexperienced. But more than that,” she turned back around, her brow furrowed. “I’m concerned about your judgment. I’ve heard about all the partying you’ve been doing on this tour.”

  I gulped and looked down at my ankle boots. I was sunk. The woman didn’t miss a thing.

  “All that said I’m still willing to offer you a signing bonus of thirty thousand. I just need your word that drugs won’t be an issue.”

  I nodded, telling myself it wasn’t a lie, not really. I was quitting. Drugs wouldn’t be an issue for me anymore.

  “Good. I can assure you that Mr. Morris wouldn’t match that much upfront.”

  My head snapped up.

  “Don’t look so surprised. I know all about what Morris has been up to.” Mary tapped her fingers against her folded arm. “I think it was very shortsighted of him to try to lure Warren and Bryan out of Tempest.”

  “What do you mean?” My eyes narrowed in confusion. “I was under the impression that Morris’ offer included all the guys.”

  “No.” She shook her head. “Zenith’s deal was very personnel specific. Morris is an unrepentant disassembler. He likes to take things apart and put them back together in a way he thinks is best.”

  I put my hands over my churning stomach as the reality of it sank in. War had been planning to sell out the rest of the group. Just like he’d done to me in Seattle. This was what Bryan had wanted me to know. I wished he had just told me himself.

  It was obvious why War had kept this bit of damning information from me. It was a real manipulative move on his part, an obvious attempt to tie me to him, proposing to me the same night he’d just brokered that sleazy backroom deal with Morris, Did he honestly think I would overlook the betrayal of my brother or King and Sager just because he put a ring on my finger?

  Bryan was right. War had changed. And if he thought I would turn a blind eye to all this, well he didn’t know me any better than I knew him.

  “I put an end to it,” Mary continued oblivious to the fact that my world had just been turned upside down. “Morris has assured me he’s withdrawing his offer.” She sat on the couch again and leaned forward. “But back to you. I know what Zenith has offered you is high, but I know you’re smart enough to see through all th
ose dollar signs. His offer is back end loaded and full of stipulations. Basically, if you don’t meet them you get nothing. The most likely scenario is that you end up owing Zenith money.”

  “Read this over.” She handed me a piece of paper. “My offer is very simple.” She slid a check across the table toward me. “A thirty thousand dollar advance on a three year exclusive contract with Black Cat. Do things our way, Lace, and I think there’s a good chance that you’ll be a star.”

  I picked up the check and stared at it. Mary’s signature was a wide sprawl on both it and the contract. She was right about the Zenith deal. It was pages long and full of tons of legal mumbo jumbo. My vision tunneled in on this moment. There really wasn’t a choice. My mind was still reeling from what I’d just found out about War, but I was sure of this decision. I needed to do this. It was a chance for me to finally turn my life around.

  I picked up the pen and signed.

  The rest of our meeting passed in a blur. Mary shook my clammy hand. Beth came back in and congratulated me and before I knew it, I was on my way back down the hall, in the elevator to my floor, and in front of the door to my room.

  I inserted the key card and went inside, grateful that the room was empty. I didn’t feel up to a confrontation with War at the moment. I leaned back against the door. The air conditioning felt too cold against my feverish skin. I recognized what was going on now. It wasn’t Bryan or Mary. It wasn’t the flu. I was having withdrawal symptoms from the heroin. I’d had bouts like this before when I’d tried to quit, but never quite this bad.

  I just needed one more little dose to get me over this hump.

  Just enough to get me through today.

  After that I was done for real.

  I opened the safe and pulled out the small satchel. My hands were shaking so violently, I almost dropped the bag. I stumbled to the bed, sat down on the edge, flicked on the lamp, and unzipped the bag.

  24

  Back down in the lobby, I stuck out like a bad ink stain in my black jeans, shirt, and boots on the corner edge of a grey suede sectional. A modern sphere mobile spun lazily over my head while I tapped my fingers impatiently against my leg.

  Where was she?

  She should have been down here twenty minutes ago. I ran my hands across my face and up through my hair. The light sweet scent of vanilla still lingered on them. I wanted her soft curves back in those hands. I wanted my mouth on hers. I wanted to hear that low sound of arousal she made whenever our tongues touched.

  I wanted her. Now.

  I shifted, gaze flicking to War at the other end of the sectional where he sat talking to Dizzy.

  Everything was so fucked up. War was the wrong guy for her. I could finally see that. Sure, I’d once made a promise to him, but this wasn’t high school anymore. And I never promised that I would stand idly by while he let her spin out of control. I had to get Lace to acknowledge what was between us. I was her first and dammit to hell I was going to see to it that I was her last.

  “Where is she, man?” I threw up a hand. “Did she text you? It’s not like her to be late.”

  “I dunno.” War shrugged, glanced down at his phone, and then looked over as King and Sager burst out laughing. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

  “King’s response to this cop who was hassling him when we were at that truck stop in Richmond,” Sager replied with a smirk. “I recorded it and put it on our YouTube channel. Come over. You guys need to see this.”

  War, Dizzy, and I moved over to the chairs where Sager and King were sprawled. We leaned in over the laptop and King scrolled up the volume.

  “You been smoking some marijuana?” The cop on the screen asked in a condescending tone.

  “Not yet,” King replied with his usual sassy grin.

  The cop’s brows rose. “I’m just checking. I don’t know if you knew, but a lot of drug deals go down around here.”

  “Really?” King bowed up. “I get my drugs somewhere else.” He folded his arms over his thick chest and stared down at the much shorter uniformed man. “Is this because I’m Hispanic? If you don’t mind, officer, could I have your badge number?”

  I watched the cop and King but I zoned out on their conversation as my ears picked up the unmistakable sound of my own raised voice in the background. “I’ll never forget prom and how it was between us.”

  Fucking shit.

  I glanced nervously at War. Oh yeah, he heard it too. His eyes slid to me, and then back to Sager. “Play that part again, Sager.” He frowned. “And turn it up.”

  “War,” I started.

  “Just shut the fuck up!” War growled.

  My muscles locked tight as the tape replayed. With the volume up, you could hear pretty much the whole incriminating thing. There was a long moment of stunned silence when the clip finished. No one moved and no one spoke. Even the lobby noise seemed to fade away as War and I stared each other down. I felt the dynamic between us shift forever.

  “You lying asshole!” War finally shouted his face a furious mask. “How long you been fucking my woman behind my back?”

  “It’s not like that…” But I never got the chance to complete that thought. Without warning, War’s fist flashed out and connected with my jaw.

  I took a step back, gingerly touching a thumb to the blood on my lip. My gaze narrowed. “I’ll give you that one, but let’s take this somewhere else. I don’t want to talk about this out here.”

  “I don’t care what you want.” My guts wrenched. “I trusted you, Bryan. Like a brother.” He shook his head. “Can’t believe you’d do this to me.”

  “I love her, man.”

  “Don’t we all.” His lips twisted. He turned to Dizzy. “You know about this?”

  Dizzy nodded uncomfortably.

  “Listen.” I pulled in a calming breath through my nose. Time to get this out. “It was only that one time in high school.” My brows pulled together as my eyes met his. “But I’ve wanted there to be more between us, and you need to know I’ve asked her to choose.” I didn’t tell War that if she chose him that I wasn’t going to quit trying. And I guess that’s what it all came down to. War and me, our friendship, having each other’s backs, that shit always came first with him. Everything and everyone else was a distant second. The Morris deal was proof of that. He didn’t see the conflict I had because there wasn’t one for him. If he were in my place, I knew in my gut that he wouldn’t have any problem walking away from her.

  For me it was never that simple.

  War’s jaw tightened. “You guys covering for Bullet, too?” His eyes sliced into me before cutting to Sager and King.

  “Leave us out of it,” King fired back.

  “That’s his plan,” I bit out. “As long as we’re clearing the air, let’s get everything out in the open.” I threw up my hands. “War’s taking an exclusive deal from Zenith. He’s breaking up the band.”

  “What the fuck, asshole?” That from King, our large angry Latino drummer’s eyes were flared.

  “You’re so full of shit.” I held War’s gaze and gave it to him, the destructive truth pouring out of me like pus from an infected wound. “Acting all self-righteous. Giving us that tired worn out old speech about the band being a priority. None of us are a priority to you, Warren. Not Lace, not me, not the guys. To you we’re all replaceable.”

  Suddenly the hair on the back of my neck stood up again. It wasn’t that watched feeling I’d had with Lace earlier. It was more like an icy chill, like cold fingertips running up my spine. I glanced over my shoulder. A couple of paramedics jogged past toward the elevators rolling a stretcher between them.

  I turned back to the unfolding scene. Dizzy’s light brown eyes were narrowed with accusation.

  “You’re the one who’s replaceable,” King warned, looming over War, Sager at his side. “Pinche guero culero.”

  The chill I’d just had suddenly morphed into a horrible premonition the moment I heard Dizzy’s cell phone buzz.

  Di
zzy’s expression transformed from puzzlement to shock as he fielded the call. Then suddenly, without a word, he broke for the bank of elevators at a flat out run.

  My veins flooded with ice water. I bolted after him. I caught him at the elevator, jumping in just as the doors closed.

  Face pale, Dizzy looked at me. “Those guys that just went by are for Lace. Beth found her in her room. His eyes began to tear up. “Bryan, she isn’t breathing.”

  25

  A low humming sound hovered around the edges of my consciousness while a diffuse bright light up ahead propelled me forward. As I followed it, the light coalesced into rays of sunlight streaming through the trees.

  “Lace,” his deep familiar voice called.

  I blinked, dragging my eyes away from the fresh tilled dirt and craned my neck around to look at him. Hands in the front pocket of his dark jeans, wind blowing his hair into his grey green eyes, he shuffled forward. “War’s looking for you.”

  I shrugged, disinterested, returning my attention to the grave marker in front of me. My hands balled into fists.

  How dare that bitch die on me.

  Without saying anything, he dropped down to the ground beside me. He didn’t ask if he could join me and I wasn’t about to tell him he couldn’t. I needed him. More than anyone else. War hadn’t known what to say to me. I could tell he was worried, but he didn’t really understand.

  My mother’s death had totally shaken me. Not because she’d overdosed, but because she was gone. My anger toward her had fueled my fervor to succeed. Now that she wasn’t here, how was I going to prove her wrong? Show her that I was worth something.

  We sat silently together. I could hear the steady hum of the traffic from the nearby freeway. I continued to stare blankly at my mother’s name on the tombstone. His warm hand covered my own. Nothing in my entire life felt more right than that hand on mine.

  “Did you ever go back to University House to see her?” Bryan’s soft question broke the silence.