The Handbook

by Jim Benton

  “I know. I know. Me too. Let’s have a look at the Handbook. It will have something about how we should punish him so he doesn’t do it again,” his dad said.

  “I really don’t want—”

  “I know. But we have to,” he said, and he took their copy of the Secret Parent’s Handbook from its secret hiding place, behind a stack of their old math textbooks from high school. “Let’s see, getting home late …”

  Just then, there was a knock on the door and Jack’s dad jumped up to answer it.

  It was Maggie’s dad.

  “Have you heard from them?” Jack’s dad asked hopefully.

  “No, but I think we’re going to have to clear this book thing up. Mind if we come in?”

  “We?” Jack’s dad asked.

  Jack, Maggie, and Mike sat on some little beds in one of the Resistance dorm rooms.

  “This should be okay, don’t you think?” the General asked them.

  “I’m not staying here,” Mike said. “This is a dump. I’m going home.”

  “They’re looking for you, Mike,” the General said. “Your home isn’t really your home at the moment. That book, the Handbook, is everything to them. It’s how they control us. Whatever secrets it possesses are essential to them and their power. For some reason, they think you have a copy, or think you’ve seen enough of it that you are a threat.”

  “So, when they find out that they’re wrong, they’ll leave us alone,” Jack said.

  The General laughed bitterly.

  “When was the last time you heard an adult admit they were wrong about something? They still wear clothes that are ten years old because they won’t even admit they’ve gone out of style.”

  Maggie giggled in agreement. “I know! My mom has this one horrible dress that she can barely even fit over her wide a—”

  The General interrupted her.

  “No. All you can hope for now is that they believe you really do have a copy, and maybe we can use that belief to negotiate for your freedom.”

  Marion added, “Remember, they shot at you.”

  “That thing probably just stuns you,” Mike said. “Besides, I’m like a ninja. I’ll get into my house without them even seeing me. Without them even smelling me. I’m a smell-ninja. That’s a ninja that even dogs can’t detect.”

  He punctuated the statement with a threatening karate pose directed squarely at Marion.

  Marion raised an eyebrow at Mike’s plump physique and cast a doubtful look at Jack and Maggie.

  “Tell you what. Let’s hear what you remember from the book; then we’ll talk about where we go next from here,” the General suggested.

  “I was the only one who saw it,” Jack said quickly. “These two have nothing to tell you.”

  Maggie was touched by his protectiveness.

  “Then tell us what you saw,” the General said.

  “I only glanced at it, you know. It just looked like some dumb old book. It was supposed to look like a collection of turnip recipes.”

  “Yes, turnip recipes. Of course. I see. Go on.”

  “I remember a couple chapter headings like ‘Face-Making’ and ‘Not Finishing Dinner.’ But I don’t remember anything other than that. I didn’t read any of the strategies.”

  “Interesting that you would refer to them as ‘strategies’ if you didn’t read them,” the General said with some obvious distrust.

  Maggie suddenly spoke loudly, almost yelling.

  “Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh!” Her voice was filled with urgency. She waved her hands wildly.

  Jack and Mike were confused by Maggie’s sudden outburst.

  “My parents have a copy! I’ve seen it. It’s labeled Turnip Recipes. We never have turnips, but I’ve seen them looking through it a jillion times. I know exactly where they keep it. We won’t have to wait a hundred years for this, will we, General?”

  She touched his arm and he stared down at her hand.

  “I, um,” the General stammered.

  Suddenly her mood changed. She seemed sad. “But you guys are right. Those agents are looking for us. There’s probably no way to get past them. I mean, you’d have to be a genius …”

  She smiled at the General and he blinked several times before awkwardly smiling back.

  Agent Washington and other agents sat in a black car in front of Jack’s house. They were trading information on their cell phones as a little boy crept up behind their car and stuck a device underneath their bumper.

  Agent Washington spotted him in the rearview mirror.

  “Hey, kid! What are you doing back there?”

  “My ball rolled under your car. I’m trying to get it.”

  “Get out of here. You could break your neck that way.”

  The boy walked away and secretly spoke to somebody on his cell phone.

  Moments later, the red minivan that the kids had escaped in with Marion pulled up slowly in front of Mike’s house, and the agents slid down in their seats and quietly watched it.

  “It’s them,” Washington whispered into his phone, and he reached for his immobilizer. “The three targets are back, as predicted.”

  The minivan door slid open and the three kids climbed out slowly with their heads down.

  Suddenly, Washington threw open his car door and yelled, “FREEZE!” He began firing immobilizer blasts in their direction.

  The kids jumped back into the minivan and it took off squealing, throwing dirt and dust as it sped around the corner.

  “All units! All units!” an agent yelled as their shiny black cars took off in pursuit of the minivan, the agents inside shouting into their microphones and activating their immobilizers.

  They raced through the turn, squealing tires and raising a cloud of dust and exhaust.

  After they were completely out of sight, a small blue car rolled up slowly with Marion behind the wheel. Jack, Mike, and Maggie climbed out and looked around.

  They were all wearing different clothes now—the decoys in the red minivan the agents were currently chasing were wearing their original outfits.

  Jack laughed. “How long before they find out that those kids in the minivan aren’t us?”

  “The Resistance is clearing traffic ahead of them all the way to the next state. That minivan has an extra gas tank, and Mole is the best driver I’ve ever known. Plus, we planted a magnetic pulse detonator on the agency car that will go off in a few minutes and disable their communications and their blasters. They won’t be able to shoot at the van, and they won’t be able to radio for backup. They’ll have no choice but to keep following them. My guess is that it will take them at least eight or nine hours to figure out that those kids are fakes.”

  “So, uh, we’ll call you when we have the book,” Jacksaid.

  “The second you have it, press the CALL button on the phone we gave you. It’s programmed with our number, and we can track you with the GPS in the phone. As soon as we get the signal, we’ll be there to extract the book.”

  “And us,” Maggie said. “You’ll extract the book and us.”

  Marion nodded. “Right. The book and you.”

  As the three began to walk away, Marion motioned Maggie back over to the car.

  She smiled sweetly and Maggie leaned in a little to hear her.

  “You better get that book, little girl,” Marion said. Her voice fell to a threatening, low whisper. “The General won’t be able to keep me from kidnapping indefinitely. Lots of the other Resistance members agree that abducting and interrogating parents is a much easier way to accomplish our goals.”

  “Why are you telling me this?” Maggie asked.

  “I wanted you to know that I’m planning on grabbing your parents first. Then Jack’s, then Plus Size’s over there.”

  “I’m getting the book just like you asked,” Maggie said, her voice trembling.

  Marion leaned in close and whispered to Maggie.

  “Your family will be the first I put in cages if you don’t bring us that boo
k,” she said as she pulled away.

  Maggie swallowed hard and ran quickly back to her friends. Mike was eyeing his house worriedly.

  “We’re late,” Jack said. “I’m in trouble.”

  “You’re in trouble? I stole the car and wrecked it,” Mike said. “Will you guys walk in with me so I have somebody to back up my story?”

  “We’re all in trouble,” Maggie said. “I believe what the General said about this book. It’s more important to the parents than we realized. And I don’t know about you guys, but I think letting the Resistance have it might be as bad as what the parents do with it. Maybe worse.”

  “You don’t really know where your parents have a copy, do you?” Jack said to Maggie.

  “Of course not. But we had to get out of there. What else could I say?”

  “See, she destroyed the conversation, Jack,” Mike said. “Just like your ol’ pal El Destroyo. We’re a good team, Maggie. We should destroy something together sometime.”

  They followed Mike into his house.

  “I think you could be right. I think the General would probably abuse the power,” Jack said.

  “Like we did,” Maggie said quietly. “But way worse. It makes me so mad that our parents have been manipulating us, but we did it right back as soon as we had the chance. Can you imagine how Marion would use it?”

  Jack cringed.

  “Mom! Dad! I’m home!” Mike yelled.

  Nobody answered.

  Jack’s eyes fell on a huge scorch mark on the wall, and then another. They followed the path of burnt spots to the bathroom door, which had been smashed in.

  “Mike … ,” Jack began.

  “They took my parents?” Mike said in disbelief. “They took my parents?” he repeated, finally yelling, “they took my parents!”

  “Oh my gosh,” Maggie said. “They probably took all of our parents.”

  The three ran to Maggie’s house. The lights were on, the front door was open, and the couch was still warm from an immobilizer blast. Her parents and brother were gone, and the same scene awaited them when they searched Jack’s house.

  Tears streamed down Maggie’s face, and Mike was working hard to hold his back.

  “We have to call the police,” Maggie said.

  “You’re right, Maggie,” Jack said. “This has gone way too far.”

  “Jack?” Mike said, rubbing his eyes. “You don’t think they’ll come back here to find us, do you?”

  “Nah,” Jack said. “They’re busy chasing the decoys. They have no idea we’re even—”

  A blast of energy tore past them and slammed into the wall, sending sparks flying.

  The smoke briefly concealed them and they darted out the back door and scrambled over a fence.

  They ran for blocks and blocks, one of Mike’s arms flapping helplessly behind him.

  They finally had to stop to catch their breath, and they hid in some bushes. They crouched there, panicked, wheezing, frightened, and without a plan.

  “I think they grazed me. They got my arm. It feels like it’s asleep. I can’t move it.”

  “We should have called the police,” Maggie said.

  “And what?” Jack yelled. “And what? And get hauled off to wherever it is they took our parents?”

  “I have to pee,” Mike said.

  “You can’t,” Jack said. “If you stand up, they might see you. Just hold it.”

  “I can’t, dude. I’m going over into those other bushes. I’ll ninja pee so nobody can see me. Besides, we lost them anyway,” he whispered, and quickly shuffled off.

  The two sat there quietly, waiting for Mike to return.

  Finally, Maggie whispered, “You know, it just occurred to me that we didn’t double back like you taught me before. We ran in a straight line.”

  Jack nodded. “Yeah, we probably should have been a little more—”

  In a neighboring bush, Mike crouched down. “I can’t get my zipper open with one hand. Jack, will you come and help me get my zipper ope—”

  An immobilizer flashed and crackled and Mike fell face-first into the bush between them.

  “Mike?” Jack said, shaking his friend gently.

  There was another blast and Maggie fell over on her face with a thud.

  Once more the immobilizer struck, and Jack felt an intensely painful stinging sensation surge through his entire body. Everything went dark as he fell forward and heard the sounds of the agents talking on their cell phones.

  Jack felt a hand on his cheek.

  “Jack. Wake up, sweetheart.” The soft, gentle voice made him feel good.

  “Mom?” Jack whispered.

  “No, I’m a nurse. But your mom is here, sweetheart. Do you want to talk to her? You have to wake up, Jack.”

  Jack opened his eyes. He was in a small room with a white-haired nurse sitting in a chair next to his bed.

  “What happened?” he said.

  The nurse looked over toward the door. One of the agents was standing there, staring intently at Jack. The memories suddenly came back to him.

  He sat up quickly. “Where’s Maggie and Mike?” he demanded. He swiveled his legs around to jump out of the bed, only to find that one wrist was handcuffed to it. “Take this off me!” he shouted. “Right now!” He rattled and tugged at the handcuffs.

  The agent walked over and removed an immobilizer from the holster under his jacket. He waved it threateningly at Jack.

  “Baby need a pacifier?” he asked Jack with an ugly smile.

  Jack looked at the immobilizer and calmed down.

  “You said my mom was here. I want to talk to my mom.”

  “Oh, we’ll all talk pretty soon,” the agent said, and returned to his position in front of the door.

  Jack thought for a moment. He thought about the Handbook.

  “Yes,” Jack said. “You’re right. We should talk. I think we should talk about personal responsibility. I think we should talk about doing the right thing. What do you two gentlemen think that means … ?”

  The agent and the nurse smiled and sat down on the bed next to Jack as Maggie was dealing with her own problems a few hallways over.

  “You can’t keep me here!” Maggie shouted angrily. “You can’t just shock people and drag them off and lock them up!”

  An agent stood in front of Maggie’s door, and a man in a suit was sitting on the edge of her bed, watching her try to get his handcuff off.

  “Those are neat handcuffs, aren’t they?” he said. He was official, but friendly. He reminded Maggie of a school principal.

  “No. Well, yes, they’re a little bit neat. But you can’t lock me up like this. Are you the police? The government? Unlock these.”

  “I’m Mr. McMaster,” he said with a bright smile. “But a lot of the people here just call me the Supervisor. That’s a funny name, huh? It’s like a spy name.”

  “You’re a spy?” Maggie said, clearly not believing him.

  “Not a spy—not exactly. Look, let’s go talk to your parents about the book and stuff like that. You like gummy worms? I’ll get you gummy worms if you promise not to give us any trouble.”

  Maggie looked over at the agent. “He’ll blast me with that weapon of his if I don’t do what you say, right?”

  The Supervisor laughed. “Yeah. You’ll be asleep before you hit the ground.”

  “Okay. I won’t give you any trouble. Keep your worms. Where are we going?”

  “Let’s go to the Family Room,” the Supervisor said, unlocking her handcuffs.

  They walked down several long hallways, escorted by two agents. The Supervisor kept a fatherly hand on her shoulder.

  A technician stopped them and put a clipboard in front of the Supervisor. He read it for a moment and turned to Maggie.

  “Green, yellow, or blue, Maggie; which color gumball would you pick?” he asked her with a smile.

  “Are you serious? Blue,” she grumbled. “Of course.”

  “Make them blue,” the Supervisor sai
d happily to the technician, and signed the document on the clipboard.

  They continued walking and he patted Maggie’s shoulder. “We’re running tests on some special medicine we can hide in gum and candy to make kids, uh, behave better,” he said. “I probably would have chosen green. Thanks for your help.”

  “You’re drugging kids?” she asked, horrified.

  “Well, not yet, Maggie. But I’ll let you in on a little secret: We will be soon. You and your friends are actually helping me convince others that it’s necessary. I want to start drugging them right away,” he said with his broad, friendly smile.

  “Why? Why would you want to do that?”

  “Maggie, kids today are smarter, much smarter than they used to be. And they’re so great at technology. Eventually, I’m not sure we’ll be able to control them with the simple strategies in the Handbook, and we’ll need to just—you know—slow them down a little.”

  “When are you going to do this?”

  “Oh, I don’t know for sure, Mags, not exactly. See, not everybody here completely agrees with me on this one. But it will happen soon. Sooner than some people think.”

  After what seemed like a mile of busy hallways, they arrived at their destination.

  The Family Room, as he had called it, was a huge space filled with gigantic screens and computers. Countless men and women were monitoring videos and data coming in from what looked like all parts of the world, and it reminded Maggie of a very expensive version of what the Resistance had set up in the old school gym.

  Technicians scurried around on catwalks, in a hurry to share their information with other technicians.

  The armed agents moved around more slowly. They watched the monitors and talked in whispers to each other. Maggie could feel them staring at her.

  She and the Supervisor began walking up a staircase to a large door, guarded by the biggest, toughest agents Maggie had seen so far.

  “Wait,” Maggie said. “Aren’t you worried that I’ll tell people what you’re doing? That this whole big scheme of yours will be discovered?”

  The Supervisor stooped down so that he was eye to eye with Maggie. His smile faded.