by E. F. Jacks
“Maybe you weren’t the same after, you know…” I stop before finishing. It isn’t my place to speculate what happened to him over there. “You worked in Vancouver?”
“No. In New York City.” He pauses. “At least I think it was there. I’m not from there, though. I know that. I remember visiting Albany as a kid with my dad. I think he worked there. We lived near there. In a small town.” His voice fades as though he’s realizing he’s telling me something he shouldn’t.
“You don’t remember whether you worked in New York? Or where you were raised?” I shake my head as though I have water in my ear. Should I be worried his memory could get us lost?
Ellis’s face reddens and he looks away.
His shame reaches through to me and I stop my questions. “Anyway, I never would have thought you worked in a big city, if that is correct.”
“Why? Because of how I dress?”
“No.” He’s handsome enough to do anything he wants regardless of what he wears. “I never would have thought that because of that rich guy remark you made about your girlfriend, your ex-girlfriend.”
“Sure, I was pretty well-off when I worked there.”
“Pretty well-off?”
He makes no effort to downplay his pride and grins. “Okay, very well-off. I’m a little less so now, of course. But I’m still comfortable.”
“You are?”
Ellis chuckles. “Shocking, huh?”
My brows draw together. “You’re saying you left most of that money behind for this?”
Ellis’s voice becomes haughty. He’s getting defensive. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
I part my lips, and “Why?” sputters out.
Ellis gazes around us at the pine-crowded hills and smiles despite our situation. He pauses, then as he speaks his voice wavers. “Because I love being out here.”
“If you love it so much, then how come you had to think of what to say when I asked you?”
He looks straight ahead and ignores my question. I don’t push him further for an answer.
My chest warms, and my thighs prickle from exertion as we ascend the winding hill. Well, Ellis is faster than me. Halfway to the top, I stop and bend over, rest my arms on top of my legs.
Ellis’s feet pound as he jogs back to where I’ve fallen behind. “Are you okay?”
His never-ending supply of energy amazes me. He eases the backpacks and gear off his shoulders. “Is this okay?” He begins to slip his arm around me.
I like that he’s asking for my permission. I nod my okay, and he guides me over to a smooth, elevated rock, sitting me down as though it’s a park bench. His arm lingers on my waist although I no longer need his assistance.
“Thanks,” I say, and he blushes as though he’s forgotten he’s left his arm around me and removes it.
Ellis takes a water bottle out of his backpack and kneels to my level. “Do you want some?”
I gulp some down. The liquid catches in my throat and I cough. “Hey, how come you always seem to have fresh water to drink?” I listen as Ellis explains he carries water purification tablets on him. “So, we don’t need to save water?”
“Drink it sparingly if you can.” I pay attention to him as if he’s my instructor. “The tablets I have—I brought enough for going by raft, not walking. We’ll run out of them sooner or later.”
I swallow the water carefully, not wanting to take more than I need at the moment. “What happens then—when we run out of the tablets?” I hand the bottle back to him.
“We’ll have to drink pure river water. It’s almost the same as tap water back home where you’re from, but it can be a little dirty.” He grins at me despite the unpleasant news he’s delivered.
I rest my hands on my legs and slouch, bend my head so I’m looking at my feet. “Seth—my ex—he wanted me to lose more weight. Guess he was right. I can’t even make it up this one hill without keeling over.”
“Nah, you’re already gorgeous.”
My skin burns from embarrassment at all the attention his eyes bestow upon me. “Thanks, but you don’t have to lie. I can handle it.” In a quiet step, Ellis darts behind me, and for a few moments I’m worried I’ve offended him. I crane my neck around to him. “Ellis? I wasn’t trying to sound harsh, you know.”
He motions for me to hush, and his expression is serious, his features hardened.
My voice is faint. “What’s wrong?”
“I thought I heard something.” He slides his gun out of his bag.
I lift myself up fast as if I’m sitting on a den of hungry, crawling ticks.
Ellis’s arms extend to me, and it takes me a second to comprehend he intends to protect me. He pulls me to him, and I relinquish all control of my body to him. I’m shielded within the warm, strong place that is his body and protected from whoever’s out there. Allowing him to take full control of all of me.
Out in the forest there’s silence once again. Ellis levels his hand near my face and gestures for us to resume hiking.
We pick up our bags and take soft, careful steps. He totes the gun in his hand as we walk.
Chapter Thirteen
Pauline
After a while both of us are hungry and exhausted. We head down to the river again when Ellis is confident it’s safer.
“Are you sure?” I ask. “What about whoever’s out there?”
“I’ll protect you.” Then he takes some fishing line and a hook out of his backpack. “I have an idea.”
“Are you setting a trap for them?”
“No. Fishing.”
“Don’t you need a rod or something?” I say.
“Nah. This could do the trick.”
“Where’s the bait?”
“You’ll see.”
Ellis fastens the glinting hook to the line, then spears a piece of dehydrated breakfast meat through it. He stands on a wide, even rock overlooking the river and dunks his hook into the water. I watch eagerly as fish approach the clear surface and create furrows, but none take the bait. Each time a fish appears, my chest expands with anticipation, then settles when Ellis isn’t successful. After a few moments of this, the line tightens and he pulls it in. A large fish is flapping from the end.
I clap my hands. “Bravo!”
Ellis bows and then walks back to where I wait on the beach. “I thought you’re a vegetarian.” He uses his hand to block the sun from hitting his eyes.
I shrug. “I’m not going to starve.”
To my surprise, he laughs.
Ellis takes the fish off the hook and sets it on a rock near me, where its body stills. I close my eyes and wince. I feel sorry for the creature, but who knows when we’ll next be able to have a fresh meal out here. Ellis turns from me and heads back over to the large rock hanging over the river.
“What are you doing?” I cringe at the echo my voice makes.
Ellis glances at me and gestures with the line and hook that he’s going to try for another fish. Normally, I would insist I take a turn, but given the situation I figure it’s best for me to wait.
“Oh, shit.”
I look up to see the fishing line Ellis grips waving in the wind, with no silver hook. He coils the line around his hand and walks back to me. “I lost it. I lost the hook.”
“That’s okay. Let’s enjoy this meal while we can,” I say.
I look away as he uses a small knife to fillet the fish. He excuses himself to rinse his hands in the river and then returns.
“We’re not going to eat it raw, are we?” I ask, kneeling by him.
“You mean like sushi? Yeah, it’ll taste kind of like that once I’m done.” He removes one of our tin meal pans from his pack and a small bottle of what looks like lemon juice.
“What’s that for?”
“You can sort of use lemon juice, the acid in it, to ‘cook’ fish.”
His way of putting it doesn’t inspire much confidence in me. “Sort of?”
“Well, it’s not the same as roasting it
over a fire, obviously. We don’t have time to start a fire, so this’ll have to do. I hope you don’t mind, being a vegetarian and all.”
“That doesn’t exactly matter given the circumstances. You brought the lemon juice along, why? You were expecting us to need it?”
The red in his neck and face deepens. “I brought it because you never know.”
Ellis dribbles the lemon juice over the beautifully whitish-pink fish. We wait a few moments, and then after he gobbles down a hunk, he holds a piece out to my mouth. “Part your lips.”
I hesitate.
“Go on. Who knows when we could get a chance to eat again.”
“Here goes.” I lean my head forward as I open my mouth. I shut my eyes, knowing that if I don’t get this over with right away, then I’m never going to eat the raw fish. Because I doubt Ellis’s story about the lemon juice. He’s probably trying to get me to eat so I’m not famished later.
Ellis places the fish piece on my tongue and I chew. His feeding me is almost sexy. Would be sexy under different circumstances. I never knew eating fish could be so hot. The texture is cool and surprisingly delicate, and its taste is bland with a slight zing from the lemon juice.
I open my eyes to Ellis’s beautiful green-gray eyes with thick lashes staring back at me. A smile passes across his handsome face. “Tastes like sushi, right? I told you so.”
I know he wants me to agree. “How would I know?” But I haven’t always been a vegetarian, and it does kind of taste like sushi.
***
We develop a structure to our hiking. While he guides the way, I help watch out for unusual noises or sights. It’s hard to let our guard down, so we chat less than we did on the raft.
Ellis peeks at me over his shoulder. I’m strides behind him and struggling to keep up. But when I tell him to feel free to go ahead, he won’t listen. He’s keeping quite a close watch on me. That’s what the tour company’s paying him to do. It would look bad for him if something happens to me out here under his care.
My foot kicks up a rock to where he is. The path is clearly not maintained by anyone, and has been created simply from hikers passing through over the years. We haven’t seen anyone on foot, and if I didn’t know better, I’d believe there’s no one out here except us. After everything that’s happened, I know that’s not true.
Who’s doing all of this to us? Is the wrath intended for me? Or are they after Ellis? I eye his back, his wide shoulders moving under his jacket. Is there something he’s not telling me? If that’s the case, then someone’s going to pay big time for getting me dragged into this mess. Although Sam was taller and slimmer than me, I have long, light brown hair like she did. Does whoever is out there think I’m her? After all, this trip was originally hers.
“Do you think my sister is the intended target of all this?”
Ellis stops walking at the suggestion, and allows me to catch up to him. “Is there something I should know about? Something you’re not telling me?” His voice betrays the questions. From his inflection, it doesn’t appear as though he’s one bit concerned that my suggestion is the actual cause of all this chaos.
I slide a sidelong glance in his direction. “You sound pretty damn confident that I’m wrong.”
Ellis places his hand on his chest and lurches back. “Don’t take our situation out on me, Pauline. I’m just as miserable about it as you are.”
“I’m not upset with you. But I don’t know why you’re so sure I’m wrong about my sister.” I continue walking, leading the way this time.
“Wait.” Ellis’s footsteps hurry to reach me. He tugs at my sleeve. “Why do you think someone’s after your sister? Do you even look like she did?” He matches my pace.
I nod as we climb uphill together. My chest burns from the effort. “Sam was taller than me, but we both have the same hair. The exact color, and almost the exact length.”
“From far away you might even look like her to someone,” Ellis says.
“Exactly.”
His tone takes on a gentler note. “Did she have any enemies?” He walks so close to me his firm arm brushes mine.
“Sam was pretty perfect. She didn’t have a past. Not like I do.”
“You’re certain? Maybe you didn’t know her as well as you think you—”
“I knew her better than anyone. And no one would want to hurt her,” I snap and whirl around to face him. “Sam was beautiful. She was smart. She was loving and lovable.”
“You would think no one would want to hurt her, but maybe that’s not the case.” Ellis looks away from me and pauses. Then he faces me again. “All I’m saying is we have to consider all possibilities…”
My eyes narrow at his mouth and he goes quiet. His glance falls to his arm.
“I’m just sorry she’s gone,” I say. What if he is right?
He looks over at me. “It’s not your fault.” From his voice I can tell he’s sincere.
An awful roaring sound cuts through the woods onto our path. Something moves at us with footsteps that are too heavy for a human.
“Ellis, what’s that…”
Feet pound the ground toward my side. I get a nostril clearing whiff of its raw, natural scent, and see its hulking shadow—through my eyes it looks as wide and as tall as two of Ellis—before I notice its entire presence.
It’s a full grown grizzly bear, standing on its hind legs, and blowing out of its snout. With its fluffed brown hair, it could be cute, until it lowers its jaw with a deep growl, and I catch a peek of its teeth. Oh, my.
Its breath is hot on my face as it holds out its arm, and its big, long-clawed paw comes at me. I scream, and I don’t stop.
Then Ellis stands between me and the bear. He touches my hand and whispers back orders to me. “Don’t move. Don’t speak.”
I’m silent. His presence is the sole assurance that keeps me from collapsing on my knees in terror and letting the massive bear maul me, or at least making Ellis have to deal with my freak out and the bear.
Ellis is so close to the mammoth creature’s jaws that fear for his life squeezes my throat. I grab onto the back of his shirt and hide behind his large frame. My face is pressed to his rope-like back muscles, which move against me as he reaches to pull the gun out from the small of his back. He smells so…good. And I can’t believe I’m thinking about sex at this moment.
Ellis continues to hold me back. He’s going to shoot the bear. And maybe he doesn’t know how it will react.
Don’t get me wrong. I love animals. But even I know a male grizzly this size would have no problem devouring both of us in a couple bites.
Ellis raises his arm and points the gun up high in the air. I close my eyes.
His voice is a hoarse whisper. “Stay back.” When he pulls the trigger, my body shakes against his.
The smell burns my nostrils, and my legs and jaw tremble at the earsplitting sound. Being from the city, I was taught guns are something to fear, and it’s the first gun I’ve heard going off. My eyes open and my ears are still ringing.
The bear hasn’t left. Ellis only fired a warning shot to scare it off, which hasn’t worked. The bear grumbles and doesn’t budge. In fact, it seems to stand taller, like it’s defying Ellis.
I notice Ellis doesn’t look at its eyes when he speaks. “I don’t like wasting bullets. Next time I shoot to kill.” He’s lowered the pistol so it’s aimed at the bear’s heart.
The bear’s huge ears twitch and it releases a complaining sound. It looks behind itself, drops onto all fours and bounds, pushing its large body through the forest brush.
I’m weeping, because I’m sure it’s going to turn around and come back to maim us. Then Ellis lifts me in his arms. He’s carrying me slowly into the forest on the opposite side of the path, with his gun in his hand.
As Ellis passes through the dense pine trees with me draped over his shoulder, for more than a moment, I wonder if the grizzly will change its mind and return to chase us. Until I hear its deep, fading whine in
the distance.
I speak down into Ellis’s back. “How come you didn’t, you know, actually shoot it?”
He lowers me with a gentle motion and sets me down on the ground. “I like most animals, but I would have shot it if it hadn’t run off.” He gives me an easy smile and catches his breath.
“Will it come after us?” The thought stills my breath again.
“I won’t let that happen to you. Besides, we probably got a little too close to its living quarters back there.”
Ellis slips his bags off his shoulders, letting them fall near his feet and then leans back on a tree trunk. Leaves half obscure his face. “We can push our way through the woods, and reenter the hiking path at a later point, far away from its home.”
I gesture to the cluttered, tall bushes around us. I can hardly see through them to the other side. “How are we ever going to make our way through all this?”
Ellis reaches into a large pocket on his camouflage pants and pulls out a blade with a short wooden handle. I gasp and move to my right. Ellis eyes me warily, then secures the long knife back in his pocket at my apparent fear. What other weapons is he carrying on him that I don’t know about?
“You seem well-equipped,” I say.
“And what do you mean by that?”
“I’m only saying you have a lot of protection on you.”
“Oh, yeah? I also brought condoms, in case you’re wondering. Except when I arrived on the scene to guide you I knew straightaway I wouldn’t be using them. You’re such a cold fish.” From his voice it’s clear he doesn’t mean it and is only saying the hurtful things to distract from my question.
“How dare you!” I step forward and get in his face, matching his glare. I wince from the additional pressure I’m applying to my ankles after all the intense hiking, but I want to meet his eye level. “I wouldn’t sleep with you. Not in a million years!”
Ellis’s eyes sharpen on me. He places his hand gently behind my head and pulls me toward him. His head tilts. He’s going to kiss me. I stiffen, and for a second I think about whether to shift my body away from his. Then he’s so close to me I can smell the toothpaste he managed to use this morning even all the way out here. Did I brush my teeth this morning? Either way, Ellis doesn’t seem to mind. I tremble with desire at his proximity. We’re all alone out here, and he could do anything he wants to me. And I’d let him.
