Around the World in 80 Girls: The Epic 3 Year Trip of a Backpacking Casanova

by Neil Skywalker

  Most Cambodian girls at Nr 9 were extremely good at pool and played me off the table all the time. I guess they spend a lot of time playing it. One of them was already getting a bit older (read 30), but she was nearly unbeatable. I ended up in bed with her one day after smoking a massive amount of weed with her. After a couple of bangs we came out of the room again in the afternoon. I found out later she was of Laotian heritage, and thus I got my Laos flag. I now had a five bang-to-flag ratio because the last four girls were also of different nationalities: China, Canada, USA, Cambodia and Laos. Nakry became a friend and we smoked many joints and played lots of rounds of pool. She became my “rolling” woman – more on that later.

  The days were long in the guesthouse. I’m not a big sleeper and always woke up early. In guesthouse Nr9 that’s around eleven in the morning. I spend my time smoking weed, playing pool and drinking beers.

  In the meanwhile I got the attention of two 19-year-old girls, one from Cambodia named Dara and one from Vietnam named Bian. Because there was a lot of gossip, they knew that I had been with a few girls already and started to hang out with me. They used my room to freshen up or change clothes. I’m not stupid and was aware that things could get stolen so I never left them alone and of course had the chance to watch them change clothes. It’s hard to steal in my room anyway, because I use certain techniques to keep my stuff safe.

  I later came to trust both girls and let them alone in my room sometimes. At night we’d sit by the water on the big wooden deck, joking around. Bian and I smoked weed, we’d drink a few beers or rum and cokes. I slept alone that night because Dara and Bian were going out and I was too stoned to join them. I went to bed early, but in the middle of the night there was a knock on the door and the girls walked in and jumped in my bed and we slept together. When I walked out of my room with the two girls all the guests were looking at me and I felt a man, though not much had actually happened that night.

  The next night they both came back to my room, but Bian left after a while and I had sex with Dara. I couldn’t believe it was happening. I was having sex with the hottest nineteen year-old girl in Cambodia, a girl fourteen years younger than me. She had changed her clothes a few times at my place before but I’d never seen her without a bra before. Her big boobs were straight out of a Playboy magazine, and to this day remain the most beautiful boobs I have ever had the pleasure of sticking my head between. And that says a lot.

  The next night Bian came to my room and I banged her too. It was my Vietnamese flag. Bian too had an amazing body and a great smile. When I saw her the next day Dara asked me if I’d had fun with Bian. I said yes, it was great, and that was that. She didn’t seem to mind.

  My room was close to the reception and television area, so every morning people saw me with a different girl, or sometimes two. We had breakfast together, smoked some weed and then most of the time the girls went home. The guy working at the reception was laughing his ass off every morning when I ordered some food and drinks. I was spending next to nothing per day, four dollars for a room, ten to fifteen dollars on drinks and maybe seven to fifteen dollars on food depending on whether I was alone, with a girl or with two girls. Cambodia is still one of the cheapest countries in South East Asia.

  Dara had to leave to Bangkok for a few days because her “boyfriend”, some American schmuck, wanted to go there because he thought Cambodia was too much of a dump. When I say “boyfriend”, I really mean “money-sender from abroad”, because that’s what most of those guys do. They work hard in their own country but are too socially awkward or ugly to find a girlfriend. So they fly to some exotic place, in this case Cambodia, and fall in love with the first girl who smiles at them even though she’s sometimes a hooker. They spend a few weeks together until it comes to a heartbreaking goodbye. The guy is usually a total white knight defender-of-all-that-is-good-and-sacred and thinks he can get the girl out of her miserable life if he sends money so she won’t have to work in hooker bars anymore. A true Captain Save-a-Ho. Of course, the girl has a couple of these guys sending money to her. The pretty ones sometimes even have five to seven foreign boyfriends visiting her from time to time. All she has to do is keep in touch with them, play the good girl and make sure the visiting times of boyfriends don’t overlap. This way she can make hundreds of dollars every month without even really having to do much. The tricky and pretty ones can make a thousand dollars a month, which is a fucking fortune for a local in Cambodia.

  As I said, I was starting to get some status around the guesthouse, and people were talking about me. Guys were asking me how much I was paying for those young girls and would stare at me when I told them I paid nothing. Room 44 was becoming a famous place and people were even starting to joke about it. The room itself sucked balls: the bed was full of bedbugs, little beetle-like insects who crawl all over your body and suck the blood out of you. If I turned on the light they disappeared quickly, only to come back as soon as the lights were off. Then there were the water-pipes making a high-pitched noise from time to time. I have no clue what caused this but I was getting no sleep with the bedbugs and howling pipes – and the ladies.

  During the day I would forget about it and smoke some dope. I decided to go to the Heart of Darkness club again. There were a lot of hookers out that night and even more loser white guys trying to get with some of them. Damn, those guys looked pathetic. From the look on their faces, I wondered if they ever seen pussy without pulling out their wallets first. I, on the other hand, met a short Vietnamese girl there, danced with her and went back to my room without even offering her a drink. I said upfront that I was not going to pay her money for staying with me and all she said was: “I no want your money, I like you and want be with you”.

  Well, this twenty-three year Vietnamese girl, let’s call her Nina, was something different. She was a very energetic girl, talked a lot and was a complete freak in the bed. She didn’t make it a secret that she was a pro and she fucked and sucked the living daylights out of me for the next four days. I don’t think I’ve ever banged a girl that fanatic between the sheets. She deep-throated, talked dirty, and I made her say things from one of my 1980s favorite war movies: Full Metal Jacket. She had never heard of the movie but said the famous lines anyway.

  O’me so horny. Me love you long time.

  Nina was already number five in less than a week after my time with Soriya.

  Dara texted me that she had returned early after only four days in Bangkok, and her boyfriend had come with her. I was sitting next to the pool table with Nina on my lap when Dara walked into the outside area of the guesthouse. She said she’d made an excuse to her boyfriend and come to Nr 9 to say hello to me. There was an awkward moment, but she reacted calmly and wished me a good time with Nina. They both knew each other from the Nr 9 guesthouse.

  Dara’s boyfriend was not a bad-looking guy but insecurity radiated from him. I saw him and Dara at Heart of Darkness but she couldn’t talk to me because her dork boyfriend was extremely jealous. I remember looking at the guy and feeling sorry for him. I’d been banging his girl for the last couple of days and he was just awkwardly standing at the bar trying to get attention from a barkeep who ignored him.

  Although I really liked Dara, I couldn’t care too much about seeing her with her guy. Anyway, Nina stayed with me.

  I was on a roll but decided I’d better slow it down a bit. All that banging all day, every day, the weed smoking and beer drinking were taking a toll on my body. But I couldn’t beat Nina off me with a stick. After a few days her Cambodian girlfriend Seda slept in my room too. So there I was, walking out of my room with two girls again. I had tried to do a threesome with Nina and Seda but Seda didn’t feel like it. The two girls stayed with me all day, especially Nina, who was a caring girl. I didn’t have to do anything anymore. She rolled my joints and when I wanted to eat I just had to open my mouth and Nina spoon-fed me the whole plate while I was watching television.

  At one point during the day I was very sleepy
from smoking too much weed and wanted to go to my room and sleep a bit. Nina had gone to her room a few blocks away from the guesthouse and I was sitting on a couch with Seda. I said to her that I wanted to go to sleep and asked her to join me. She agreed and when we went into the room I jumped on the bed ready to get some sleep. Seda walked straight into the shower, washed up and came out butt naked. I wasn’t expecting this; I honestly wanted to get some sleep but didn’t feel like lying in bed alone, and I think Seda was misunderstanding what I meant by “sleeping”. But I hopped in the shower too, took a two-minute shower and banged Seda afterwards. It wasn’t a great bang but I was kind of spoiled already at that point. Nina came back a few hours later and laughed about the whole thing, and that night I spent with Nina and Seda together again. Seda still wasn’t up for a threesome but pretended to sleep when Nina deep-throated me only half a meter away from her.

  Every evening I lay down at the wooden deck with some girls around me and other girls started to show interest in me too. I felt like a fucking rock star. The power of having sex at will with a selection of girls and having some dudes say I was the King of Nr 9 gave me a powerful feeling, and this pissed off some of the other guys staying in the guesthouse. They tried to get laid with some of the girls but they were asked hefty prices or downright turned down. Soriya, my first Cambodian girl, had come back from Sihanoukville, and she wasn’t too happy when she found out what had happened in the meantime. I can’t name all the girls I was hanging out with, but I knew at least fifteen girls there who where always orbiting around the pool table or the lounge deck.

  Now before anyone thinks I was throwing cash around, remember, I’m a poor backpacker. Well poor isn’t exactly the right word – maybe budget-minded would be better. At this point I still had around 30,000 US dollars in my bank account, but throwing money around wasn’t an option because I still had a few continents to conquer and a few years to go. That doesn’t mean I was a tightwad, though: I’d still buy food and drinks for girls who were staying with me, but the food was only a few dollars anyway and a can of beer was only a dollar. A pack of Ara cigarettes was less than thirty cents.

  One day I read an email from Dara in the Internet café close the guesthouse. She told me her boyfriend was about to leave and that she was dying to see me again on the twenty-eighth of January.

  I told her I would stay in Phnom Penh a bit longer to spend some time with her again. I still had a few days left before my visa ran out. When Dara came back she was really happy to see me, telling me she hated her “boyfriend” because he was no fun at all, though she stayed with him because he paid well. But she also saw that I still was with Nina. I was in my room with Nina when Seda, Soriya and Dara knocked on my door, hung around on my bed for a while and asked me to come out to drink something and play some cards. Soon after all hell would break loose.

  I was invited by five or six girls to play some drinking/card game. Room 44 had been driving me crazy, so I’d changed to a new one close to a wooden neck near the water. We all sat down on the deck and started playing. I was with Nina at the time but I couldn’t keep my eyes off Dara, who looked smoking hot. We had lots of fun together, chatting and playing cards. I made a small video of it, it’s still circulating somewhere on the Internet, since I wanted to show it to my friends back home.

  Nina hadn’t minded me sleeping with her friend Seda, so I expected her to be fine when I told her I wanted to be with Dara again. She was calm when she said okay, but looked pissed off. I should have known jealousy would take over and not to underestimate a woman’s emotions. In hindsight I figured out that Nina didn’t mind me sleeping with Seda once because Seda was less attractive than she was – but Dara was a smoking hot girl with Playboy boobs, and only nineteen years old.

  I went over to the Internet café to make a Skype call to my Russian girlfriend Julia, who I’d neglected a bit over the past weeks. She was in tears for nearly an hour as we talked. When I returned to the deck, everything had changed. The girls were in a panic. Communication with Cambodian girls was already hard but now they were shouting and screaming at me.

  This is what had happened, according to eyewitnesses:

  Nina and Dara got into an argument over who could stay with me, and some of the girls had badmouthed me, including Soriya who was still pissed off that I’d banged a lot of other girls when she left for Sihanoukville. Remember, these were freelance hookers who could make money every night, but they were fighting over a guy who wouldn’t pay them anything for many days of company. Apparently things got heated up and Nina lost it. Suddenly, for some unknown reason, she jumped into the filthy disgusting lake and disappeared.

  The girls went crazy and four Nigerian guys jumped in to search for her, but they couldn’t find her. When they got out of the water, some of them had lost their jewelry, along with a mobile phone. A few minutes later I walked back into the guest house and people tried to explain what happened to me.

  Then one of the girls saw that the light in my room was on and I went in, where I found Nina lying on the floor, dripping wet and not responding or saying anything to me. I yelled to the still-panicked girls that she was in my room and closed the door behind me. She must have swum under the wooden deck and climbed into my room through the window. I tried to ask her what happened but she just stared in front of her. I reckoned she must have used some drugs stronger than just weed. She had me told that she used some “ice” sometimes, but I told her I didn’t want to hear about it and told her not to use that shit. Apparently she didn’t listen. At one point while I was trying to get her to respond I heard a knock on the door. I opened it and found Dara and a girl named Rosie there, asking about Nina. They were angry for being scared that Nina could have drowned. I went into the corridor to calm them down, closing the door behind me.

  Suddenly the door opened again and Nina came out shouting something. She started arguing with Dara in Cambodian. All I could understand were the words Neil and “long hair” (I was called that there some times), and then it happened.

  Nina punched Dara really hard in the face. You could hear the punch land It could have been a knockout blow but Dara kept standing and grabbed Nina. They immediately started kicking and punching at each other. I tried to separate them but they were holding each other’s hair and were all strangled up. By now the whole guesthouse was watching, including all the foreigners. Some guys working at the guesthouse ran over and violently beat both girls until they let go. I jumped in because one of the guys was really giving it to them. Dara walked off crying and Nina was crying in the corner of the room. I told the staff I would take care of it and closed the door. I dragged Nina into the bathroom, took off her clothes and tried to wash and fix her up a bit. Her face was bruised from the beating the staff gave her. It all went super fast: the whole fight took less than half a minute. The staff came back and wanted to kick her out, but I bribed them with five dollars and said she would leave in the morning.

  What the hell had I got myself into? I had some thinking to do.

  I told Nina to stay in the room and went outside to see what was happening there. Outside the guesthouse I found a crying Dara. Even though she had fairly dark skin I could see that her eye was blackened and bruised from the hard punch Nina had given her. She was there with her sister and some friends who were all raging and waiting for Nina to come outside. I had to talk a lot to calm things down. I told them that Nina wouldn’t come out of the room because I didn’t want more fighting. They finally agreed to stop hanging about after a while. I felt really bad about what had happened, because Dara truly is not only a very sexy girl but also a sweet and honest one. Most freelancers are coldhearted bitches but she truly was a sweet girl.

  The following morning I had a serious talk with Nina. I was still angry with her, but mostly I was angry with myself for fucking things up so badly. She felt bad about it too and wanted me to have make-up sex with her but I didn’t want to. After she kept pushing, I let her give me a blowjob and leave. She was
not allowed back at the guesthouse for a while.

  Things weren’t exactly ideal for me either for a while. Some guys I’d known for a while there were giving me a hard time, saying I’d gone too far. Basically they were just jealous because they didn’t get any attention themselves, but it made things a bit uncomfortable. Then I went to the Internet café and saw that Dara had written me an email saying she didn’t want to see me again because it caused too much trouble.

  I wrote her back a long, apologetic email. I knew that if I wanted to sleep with her again, I’d have to lay it on thick, so there I was assuring her that she was the only one I loved, even if I’d done some other bad things, which I accepted were wrong. All in very simple language, of course, to make sure she’d understand what I was saying. Then I went to my room and watched a movie to kill some time and think things over. I was wondering if she’d reply and if everything I’d said would have an effect. But I also figured that if she continued not wanting to see me again, it wasn’t going to be a disaster. The last weeks had changed everything, and I wondered why the girls suddenly liked me so much. I supposed it could have come from implementing some of the things I’d read about in those pick-up books – I’d taken some of their advice on body language and inner game – but I didn’t use their “routines or peacock tricks”, so I couldn’t be sure what it was. Something had definitely changed, though.

  In the evening things had calmed down a bit, but people were still talking about it. After night fell I saw that Dara had come to sit on the deck by the water, but I felt a bit depressed and stayed in my room. After a while Rosie came at my door and said that Dara wanted to talk with me. She had read my email and been moved by it. Things were OK again between me and her. I was happy as a clown. She stayed with me that night, and that got noticed. By the next day I was a legend around lakeside parts. I was that guy that slept with hookers for free and had them fistfight over me but still could lay them at night.